posted November 19, 2018 05:38 PM            

Then, meets one, or two people, and can easily listen to them talk about the most banal, boring things and find them fascinating.
Day in, day out, they hear the same people say the same thing, then one day, one person says the same thing, and then **boom** instant closeness.

What triggers this in someone?

What does it take for someone who's introverted, asocial, never likes anyone really, to "click"?

posted November 20, 2018 09:17 AM            

That's interesting, and that you have so few aspects is fascinating!

posted November 20, 2018 09:33 AM            

But yeah I sometimes find someone with whom I can talk for the most boring thing and be so interested. In my case I feel like I always know what someone is going to tell me when I sense his energy (meaning when they are close to me) but it can also happen online for example but not all the time like it does with people who are near me.
However there are some people that I click with and it's like magic buy it depends on how it'll last.
I feel like I'm not interested and I don't have the need to socialize plis I feel very easily drained and quickly bored, also I am usually very dissapointed by how superficial most people are.
All these must be pretty obvious in my chart.

posted November 20, 2018 01:24 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by ithinkimightbewrong:
i'm like that too

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Wow, really? Do you feel like your 12th House Sun overrides every single “social” personal planet and house placement in your chart?

posted November 20, 2018 09:38 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by capricorncheriscty:
ithinkimightbewrong, we are both Gemini ASC with chart ruler in water house conjunct sun in water house. Maybe that is it.

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posted November 27, 2018 03:09 AM            

for those that say i have few aspect i set it so that it shows only degrees of only 4 or less

some things i might attribute it to is

venus in 11th needing intelectual stimulation...same with mercury in 12th just with a different tone

neptune in 7th needing to merge with someone completely...nothing superifcial..same with sun

taurus sun is also a bit of a homebody...i stay in 97 percent of my life

saturn conjunct dc ....proplems with relationships...same with moon conjunct saturn

pluto in fifth house...again nothing supeficial

posted November 28, 2018 05:16 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by ithinkimightbewrong:
i posted my chart above

for those that say i have few aspect i set it so that it shows only degrees of only 4 or less

some things i might attribute it to is

venus in 11th needing intelectual stimulation...same with mercury in 12th just with a different tone

neptune in 7th needing to merge with someone completely...nothing superifcial..same with sun

taurus sun is also a bit of a homebody...i stay in 97 percent of my life

saturn conjunct dc ....proplems with relationships...same with moon conjunct saturn

pluto in fifth house...again nothing supeficial

i can deeply merge wiht people but it doesn't happen often..

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You also have chiron on the ascendant.

Some interpretations I found for this placement:

<i>With Chiron conjunct the Ascendant, it can show someone who is often very self conscious, feeling like an exposed nerve most of the time. Most of the time, these people tend to have very low self worth which results in depression and feelings of hopelessness, particularly when they are young.
</i>

<i>I think Chiron conjunct the Ascendant can be particularly difficult. The Asc is our basic ability to express who we are and make our lives work. With this placement you can bumble along in life with nothing quite working, nothing ever going anywhere, and that can go on for decades. And the problem is that you’re trying to do ‘normal’, you’re trying to live your life like everyone else does, but somehow your heart is not in it, and you feel inadequate because of that. </i>

Here a comment from someone who said their father had chiron conj ascendant in gemini, just like you:

<i>My father had Chiron tightly conjunct his Asc.  He was definitely a maverick, one of the last of the self-made men.  However, he totally eschewed “feelings”.  (Chiron in Gemini, if that makes a difference).  The MIND was the only thing that mattered to him.  He was even a Pisces!  But to him, if you weren’t intelligent, you weren’t worth talking to.  I think he was wounded early on by this; he had musical talent but completely killed it off in favor of having a business mind.  He was raised by immigrant parents who were very, very strict and had a very difficult childhood.  When his younger brother came along, he was the favorite and my father was left out in the cold.  I think he put emotions aside very early and only trusted what he could control.  He was a very, very cold father.  But I have Saturn square Sun, so maybe this is just how I “saw” him.</i>

posted November 28, 2018 06:09 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Plut0nian2:
Lala I have this too exactly as you described it I am just not considered asocial by others for some reason.

But yeah I sometimes find someone with whom I can talk for the most boring thing and be so interested. In my case I feel like I always know what someone is going to tell me when I sense his energy (meaning when they are close to me) but it can also happen online for example but not all the time like it does with people who are near me.
However there are some people that I click with and it's like magic buy it depends on how it'll last.
I feel like I'm not interested and I don't have the need to socialize plis I feel very easily drained and quickly bored, also I am usually very dissapointed by how superficial most people are.
All these must be pretty obvious in my chart.

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I noticed you have saturn in aquarius (You want friends but may be emotionally distant and lack intimate relationships.) and the NN in the 7th house, so your life purpose is building relationships? Must be something you're not familiar with..

I wonder if saturn in aqua also means that you weirdly see friendship material in what looks boring to you and if that could be a subconscious blockage to not having to follow your NN which is to form relationships. The fact that Saturn is also in the 8th, means you may have difficulty allowing change and transformation. The key is to be more open to relationships and you may find them less boring.

You could also feel disappointed in people easily because of Neptune conjunct the DC, you tend to idealize (potential) partners or dream up the ideal partner, but that can result in desillusion and disappointment. Perhaps , therefore you need an earthy capricorn type which is the sign on your DC and also where your Juno is placed. It's also what you have to become more of (your NN), but not easy since your sun, SN, mercury and Chiron is in the opposite sign of cancer.

The NN in cap in the 7th may also mean Becoming willing to put in the effort to make a relationship work. Beginning to understand the practical considerations of being in a relationship that go beyond simply getting your emotional needs met. Letting go of timidity that prevents you from asserting your authority within your relationships. Becoming unafraid to set goals for relationships and expecting your partners to have their own goals too.

posted November 29, 2018 04:47 AM            

quote:

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i can deeply merge wiht people but it doesn't happen often..

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Hmmm mystery still to be solved is how does this happen? What is the key to open this proverbial gate? Can it be found in the chart? You don't have to know. Just thinking out loud here.

I figure for everyone it might be a tad different, but if someone can be figured out, then perhaps it could give a clue as to what needs to be bypassed, and how that comes about, possibly for others, too.

posted November 29, 2018 04:07 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by astri:

I noticed you have saturn in aquarius (You want friends but may be emotionally distant and lack intimate relationships.) and the NN in the 7th house, so your life purpose is building relationships? Must be something you're not familiar with..

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That's very accurate, friendship is the best type of relationship for me.
Indeed I am emotionally distant, I usually say that I am a cold person and then I may say that I'm emotional which is contradictive, but what I mean by cold is exactly that: emotionally distant.

I am very unfamiliar and still completely inexperienced at relationships. After reading astrology for so many years I still can't digest it that my life purpose is relationships. It doesn't feel right.

quote:

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I wonder if saturn in aqua also means that you weirdly see friendship material in what looks boring to you and if that could be a subconscious blockage to not having to follow your NN which is to form relationships. The fact that Saturn is also in the 8th, means you may have difficulty allowing change and transformation. The key is to be more open to relationships and you may find them less boring.

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Very accurate again what you said about having difficulty allowing change.
It's not exactly that I'm not open to relationships it's more like I a language I don't know so I can't speak it at all.
I know I will get bored at some point no matter what because I get tired and drained.
I need too much alone time.

In the first sentence of the paragraph above do you mean that I choose people I find boring as friends subconsciously in order to not follow my NN? I choose people I adore as personalities for friends, my friends have been very special to me we have a special bond, I don't mean typical friends it's more like pure unconditional love both with women and men. I like friendships because I don't have to have sex with my friends or get intimate in any other way that is expected when you're into a relationship. I don't get jealous and I just am happy and I feel free into a friendship.

quote:

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You could also feel disappointed in people easily because of Neptune conjunct the DC, you tend to idealize (potential) partners or dream up the ideal partner, but that can result in desillusion and disappointment. Perhaps , therefore you need an earthy capricorn type which is the sign on your DC and also where your Juno is placed. It's also what you have to become more of (your NN), but not easy since your sun, SN, mercury and Chiron is in the opposite sign of cancer.

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That is probably why I attract Venus in Cap conjuct their Saturn and maybe other Capricorn planets even though I'm the opposite of Saturnian myself.
The problem with Capricorn though is that it conjucts my NN but at the same time conjucts my Neptune.
I naturally dislike Cancers (Iean as and it happens with the ones that are forming a conjuction to my SN. I don't find it a coincidence that I feel Cancer and Aries are holding me back in one way or another. Even though I love my NN sign I dislike its house placement.
Until about 21yo I had a completely wrong opinion about love and relationships. In my mind it was like you fall in love with someone and if it's mutual we'll just be happy in love and that's it (even then I didn't want marriage and kids). I wouldn't think of routine and things like that, they didn't even exist in my mind or they did but they were very far from reality. At about 21yo I got to the exact opposite end. I realised what a burden relationships are and how routine kills love slowly. I know I can get over someone no matter if it takes years I will and since no relationship in my life is meant to last because something external will happen in order to lose the people I love and love me back (i'm talking about relatives, friends etc) they die or they have to move far away etc. So it isn't worth it to bond or be intimate with someone since I already know it won't last. Generally though in my life as soon as I feel a bit "safe" or hopeful about something (I mean anything like something small or something like a job) it magically gets ruined because of some kind of misfortune that came out of nowhere.
I think that is Uranus affecting both my 6th H (routine, jobs and health) and 7th H relationships with significant others.

quote:

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The NN in cap in the 7th may also mean Becoming willing to put in the effort to make a relationship work. Beginning to understand the practical considerations of being in a relationship that go beyond simply getting your emotional needs met. Letting go of timidity that prevents you from asserting your authority within your relationships. Becoming unafraid to set goals for relationships and expecting your partners to have their own goals too.

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posted November 30, 2018 05:26 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by anonymidarkness:
I'd look for luminaries connection, mercury/mercury or even 12th house for revealing hidden things, or 8th, or IC, feels like home.

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You're probably onto something, here. I don't have a lot of examples of people like this, but there is one, who made 1 connection in her late 40's, and it was with a woman who strongly hit her 8th. She said she was the only person who made her feel anything deeply for another human being. Before then she never spoke to anyone, except for at work when they made her.

A similar story with one guy, as well. He is/was essentially asocial. Self possessed to the max. I got the impression he had a lush inner world that sated him and made him unwilling to ever make a friend. Never pined for any real connection. But, when around 30, he met a woman he connected deeply with. Lo and behold, she hit his 8th.

posted November 30, 2018 06:22 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Plut0nian2:
That's very accurate, friendship is the best type of relationship for me.
Indeed I am emotionally distant, I usually say that I am a cold person and then I may say that I'm emotional which is contradictive, but what I mean by cold is exactly that: emotionally distant.

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I thought it is weird the way you describe yourself, considering you have so much Cancer energy in your chart, but then I noticed Chiron is actually in Cancer too, which means your wound is to your emotions and your ability to feel loved may manifest as feeling an inner emptiness and loneliness, a sense of something missing, not finding the nurturing you need, a tendency to sabotage relationships...so this is obviously also an obstacle to go in the direction of your NorthNode.

Your Chiron is also opposing your Saturn in the 8th, from which the latter on its own is already preventing you from diving deep into relationships.
One explanation I read about Chiron opposite Saturn is
'Extremely rigid and formal behaviors to deflect attention from deep sensitivity. ' or 'Having a rigid internal voice of authority'..
https://astrofix.net/saturn-chiron-aspects/

Chiron also makes a biquintile aspect to the moon and I read that the biquintile seems to show a greater urgency to let go, or spread, an idea or style before changing it or moving on to something else.
It seems like this urgency is largely subconscious with you, since you claim to not want more intimate relationships.

You do kind of give it away by saying

quote:

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Originally posted by Plut0nian2:

I choose being emotionally unfullfilled anytime I always have been anyway and I don't really care. 

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This of course is a contradictive statement. Being emotionally unfulfilled means you’re not having your emotional needs met (Chiron in Cancer) and can’t be truly happy, yet you claim you don’t care(Saturn in Aqua opp Chiron + chiron biquintile moon). I would think that the ‘not caring’ about your emotional state is more like a coping mechanism to deal with what you have come to terms with: that relationships are constricting, boring and not fulfilling either. So it seems that you may prefer not being in a relationship, NOT because you truly want to be alone, but because it seems like a better option than being in a relationship that feels like a chore. However, in order to feel emotionally fulfilled, on a deeper level, you most likely do desire to be in a romantic relationship, but having your NN in capricorn means you need to put in an effort and be realistic about it.

quote:

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Originally posted by Plut0nian2:
when I understood the practical considerations of a relationship (T. Saturn square natal Neptune) that I stopped wanting one even in the imaginary Neptunian way that I wanted it before. “

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Neptune on the DC is another obstacle or excuse to give up on following your NN, because at first you may have set the bar too high by expecting a too idealistic partner to then become disappointed and then you went the other opposite by focussing on the practical side of relationships mainly which turned it into a chore. Too low expectations is not good either of course.

You could for ex. write down what you expect from a relationship and the characteristics that you want in a partner and use the law of attraction to attract what you want. And take a deep look at these subconscious blockages that make you believe you supposedly don't want a relationship because not being in one doesn't make you feel emotionally fulfilled either, which means you're lying to yourself.

With your cancer energy, you may be nurturing to others (mainly friends) but in order to feel nurtured yourself on a deeper level, you need to form romantic relationships, otherwise your northnode wouldn't be there. I think you're seeing it wrong as if your NN is annoying you somehow, but it's really those other aspects that are blocking you from accessing deeper happiness which you can find by following your NN. You're your own worst enemy basically (saturn opp chiron) .

posted November 30, 2018 06:48 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by ithinkimightbewrong:
i'm like that too

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Here too, we see Chiron opposing Saturn and the Moon.

With hard Chiron-Moon aspects, there is a feeling of awkwardness about expressing our emotional needs. These people may easily tell others “I am really fine”, and then privately resent them when they can’t see the hollowness of that statement!
(from https://cafeastrology.com/articles/chironaspects.html )