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Author
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Topic: Is it just me or am i always the last to know??
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NickiG
Knowflake Posts: 829
From: Pluto, next to Ami Ann
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted November 09, 2010 02:18 PM
 
ami knows all about this, but my boyfriend doesnt seem to want to tell me important things like his jeep being broken down or being fixed....maybe, its never actually getting broken down...or my little scorpio tail is being suspicious again...is it a man thing?? ------------------
Early in the morning, in the middle of the night
Two men got up to fight
Back to back they faced each other, drew their swords and shot each other
If you dont believe my story is true, ask the blind man who saw it too :P IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 2294
From: Orbiting
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted November 09, 2010 03:20 PM
I don't think it is a "man" thing.
It is ,perhaps, a one time thing but we have to tell people what is important to us, I find. Different people are "loose " about different things.
Some people would not care about something that would drive someone else crazy It takes a really long time to learn even the simplest things about what makes another person tick lol
IF he does NOT care about your feelings/wishes, I think you have a problem.
If he does and TRIES to change, you don't.
That is how *I* would view it ,anyway. ------------------
Pluto conjunct Dejanira, Girlfriend. IP: Logged |
Randall
Webmaster Posts: 1653
From: Columbus, GA USA
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted November 09, 2010 04:10 PM
He sounds sneaky, and that means dishonesty. Honesty is very important...maybe even the most important part of a relationship. It doesn't mean he's cheating, but it's a red flag.IP: Logged |
NickiG
Knowflake Posts: 829
From: Pluto, next to Ami Ann
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted November 09, 2010 05:31 PM
dude..he doesnt contact me first...i'm always the one to start a convo and often times it takes him some time before he answers------------------
Early in the morning, in the middle of the night
Two men got up to fight
Back to back they faced each other, drew their swords and shot each other
If you dont believe my story is true, ask the blind man who saw it too :P IP: Logged |
Randall
Webmaster Posts: 1653
From: Columbus, GA USA
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted November 09, 2010 05:42 PM
Maybe he's just trying to get you to chase him.IP: Logged |
NickiG
Knowflake Posts: 829
From: Pluto, next to Ami Ann
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted November 09, 2010 05:45 PM
huh, i thought girls were to be the one that gets chased....------------------
Early in the morning, in the middle of the night
Two men got up to fight
Back to back they faced each other, drew their swords and shot each other
If you dont believe my story is true, ask the blind man who saw it too :P IP: Logged |
Randall
Webmaster Posts: 1653
From: Columbus, GA USA
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted November 10, 2010 04:00 AM
Not always. I'm usually the chasee. A lot of guys are nowadays. But I can chase as well.IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 2294
From: Orbiting
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted November 10, 2010 07:06 AM
Hmmmmmmmm Which Mars does the Doctor have  ------------------
Pluto conjunct Dejanira, Girlfriend. IP: Logged |
mochai
Knowflake Posts: 30
From:
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted November 10, 2010 08:49 AM
Not to go all psychoalanyzing on your bf, but it sounds like maybe he has had some significant trauma. There's a part of me where if my car were in the shop, I wouldn't want to tell someone because I'd be afraid of some psychological bs done to me that would be subtle and make me feel like a failure, or that they would abandon me in my moment of need, so I wouldn't want to tell them. I have a great boyfriend now but I am paranoid in thinking he will abandon me emotionally so I very rarely call him and he usually calls me. I'm so suspicious that there's something lurking under the surface and he will hurt me, which I just can't take right now. If your boyfriend's heart is in the right place it's not a big deal, but he may have large abandonment issues with the significant women in his life, whether mother or girlfriends etc. It could be something else entirely, but that's why I don't call my boyfriend. I don't do the car thing. It could also be that he needs you and he's afraid of that so he's keeping a lot of distance as self preservation, which is also something I would do. Either way I would talk to him about it. I don't know you so don't take this personally, but if it is something interpersonally, contempt, criticism, blockwalling (being cold to emotional petitions like a man ignoring his nagging /criticizing/ wife during a football game) and defensiveness were the greatest indicator of divorce in marriage and are probably applicable to dating scenarios. You can get away with it some in a relationship, but the 'bank account' has to be healthy. That doesn't mean don't be defensive and just let yourself be hurt, but maybe look at where that came from in both of you as it usually takes two. You have to be equals in a healthy relationship. I'm sure it's not that but just in case. Good luck.  IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 2294
From: Orbiting
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted November 11, 2010 07:23 AM
What is happening ,now?
Relationships are so hard.
You have yourself to deal with which is hard enough without adding another person ------------------
Pluto conjunct Dejanira, Girlfriend. IP: Logged |
NickiG
Knowflake Posts: 829
From: Pluto, next to Ami Ann
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted November 11, 2010 10:45 AM
for sure ami..but right now i'm babysitting, so whether or not he has texted or called me is unknown------------------
the better the chase, the better the reward IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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