Posts: 3274
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010

posted November 30, 2010 10:18 AM            

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I don't feel frozen,anymore.
I feel like the Tin Man in the Wizard of Oz when they oiled him

My question is "Do you feel you had trauma?"
How would you rate it,if you could?
Do you feel numb?

Thank you so much for your answers !

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If I am not for myself, who am I? If I am only for myself, what am I , Bruh ?

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Posts: 3274
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010

posted November 30, 2010 10:19 AM            

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If I had to rate my trauma, overall, taking everything in to consideration such as good things like a grandmothers love, I would say 6.
I am gonna come back and talk about the good and the bad things about my life that made me come up with the number 6.
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If I am not for myself, who am I? If I am only for myself, what am I , Bruh ?

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Posts: 3274
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010

posted November 30, 2010 11:02 AM            

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You guys know how I struggled with my mother's abuse.
LL gave me SO much love that if there were bucket fulls, they fell down on me.
One dear person,in particular, loved me no matter what.
Thank you to the best people EVER--The LL family.

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Posts: 1894
From: venus
Registered: Jan 2010

posted November 30, 2010 02:31 PM            

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Ami, my mother was emotionally abusive.

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Posts: 3274
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010

posted December 01, 2010 03:44 PM            

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Thanks Raspberri
I am SORRY you suffered that.
The mother is really hard!

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If I am not for myself, who am I? If I am only for myself, what am I , Bruh

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Posts: 3274
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010

posted December 01, 2010 03:47 PM            

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I am coming out of a numb which felt like a permanent novacaine.
If I looked too closely, I would scream so I didn't.
Sometimes, I held on so tightly cuz I thought I would fall apart.
All the safety pins would come apart and I would be in pieces like Humpty Dumpty.

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If I am not for myself, who am I? If I am only for myself, what am I , Bruh

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Posts: 3274
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010

posted December 01, 2010 03:51 PM            

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I am having memories back to the time when I was a Gem girl.
I was full of fun.
I did all kinds of activities like horseback riding and skating.
I had lots of friends.
Then, when numb came over me, all I could do was tread water in the hopes that it would not go over my head.
I had to balance myself so I would not fall irrtreivably over some edge which was waiting just outside my reach .

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Posts: 3274
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010

posted December 01, 2010 03:53 PM            

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I feel the Gem girl under there,now.
If I could get her out,I would be so happy.
It would be beyond my wildest dreams like when someone asks"What would you wish if you could have anything?"
This would be my wish.

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Posts: 1596
From: Mars
Registered: Aug 2010

posted December 01, 2010 04:12 PM            

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I would rate my trauma 8 because of lost "life enjoyment" time.

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Posts: 3274
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010

posted December 01, 2010 04:46 PM            

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I know what you mean,PS.
When I feel centered and at peace ,it is better than doing anything or going any place.
My favorite times in life have been just feeling at peace.
I remember those times before I became numb but after did not have many.

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If I am not for myself, who am I? If I am only for myself, what am I , Bruh

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Posts: 3274
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010

posted December 01, 2010 05:55 PM            

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I put myself on a program to heal trauma .I studied trauma and came up with some things.Trauma can't be healed by just talking cuz talking is a left brain activity.
It has to be healed by "feeling" which is a right brain activity
Tears are Gods way to heal .

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If I am not for myself, who am I? If I am only for myself, what am I , Bruh

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