posted December 02, 2010 05:58 PM            

I have a few.

1. Abusive personality towards others
2. Arrogance
3. Shallowness
4. Lack of Empathy
5. Bad breath
6. Unaddressed Addiction Issues
7. Deceptiveness

I could say that generally, without these particular issues, someone who is polite and has a bit of passion and intelligence has a very good chance of getting my attention.

------------------
The good is the beautiful.

posted December 03, 2010 12:12 AM            

Some important things I have recently learned the
hard way, about relationships,
after 2 marriages I walked away from;
and my 3rd. and current marriage, which is over; just have the legalities and all to deal with.
Well my big rules now are;
and these must be mutual!
In no particular order:

1. Make sure the other person is whole psychologically and emotionally whole.
And of course, you must also be whole.
You cannot fix or save each other.
That must come from each for themselves.
2. Be sure they love themselves, as must you also love yourself.
3. That they and you honestly want each other, more than need each other.
Co-dependency is unhealthy.
4. That you honestly love each others' company. Not merely tolerate or make do.
5. Sexually compatible.
6. Same ethics and moral base.
7. Intellectually and spiritually compatible.
8. You must take the time to really get to know them, and they you, before committing.
9. Honesty and trust must be had betwixt both!
10. Communicate! communicate! communicate!
11. Be yourselves! No masks!
12. Don't confuse deep friendship love with relationship love. Being great friends does not automatically mean the relationship can or should become more.
My soon to be ex is a great guy, but, in sad retrospect, we should have never tried to go beyond being simply great friends.
The trying to salvage that friendship is a very difficult task.
Bringing to each other much terrible pain now, that would not be, if we'd just stayed good friends.
I am sure I'll think of more, but am rather sleepy at the moment.

posted December 03, 2010 08:08 AM            

oddly, i have absolutely nothing in common with LEXX's chart to my knowledge, there is some planets of yours LEXX, in my 7th, but this list is certainly not qualities or something i don't feel i posses.

common ground.

posted December 03, 2010 08:52 AM            

quote:

---

Make sure the other person is whole psychologically and emotionally whole

---

Where do you find one of those

posted December 03, 2010 11:50 AM            

Still a fraking needle in a haystack to find anyone like that though... lol

posted December 04, 2010 12:09 AM            

letram
Thank you.

Ami Anne
LOL!
When you're ready, hopefully the right one for you will appear!
As to cloning iQ;
Sorry iQ, no more Cancerians for me.
LOL Ami! The clone's all yours!

Lei_Kuei
Yes indeed! Like looking for a needle in a haystack!
LOL!
However.....
That perfect "needle" for me,
would shine and stand out clearly to me amidst the dull hay straws!

posted December 04, 2010 03:37 AM            

Do:
-Treat me like an actual human being & don't be afraid to have a real conversation with me, no lines, just real quality one-on-one relating, just say "hi"
-Listen to what I say, doesn't matter if he doesn't agree, just give me the respect to hear me out
-Sees others positive qualities, and emphasizes these in conversation, either to me or to the person themselves (note, this is different from bland charm, it shows that they're appreciative and that they don't take the beauty in the world for granted)
-Sincere
-Assertive
-Pleasant soft quality to voice (but not like michael jackson)
-Act pleasant but detached, so I won't feel as if he's trying to tie me down/box me in
-Serious about his work, and life in general
-Boyish & rugged looks/Earthy

Don't:
-Any early invasion of personal space
-Orchestrating some atmosphere of comfort and close relatedness when we don't know each other very well (the manipulators)
-Any terms of 'baby' 'sweetie' etc. right off the bat, also if they use my name too much in conversation it creeps me out
-Obvious sexual staring, you know the type, if you're gonna look at me like that do it so I won't notice, cos if I do I will never take you seriously.

posted December 04, 2010 06:06 AM            

Ask yourself the question what is it like to live with me? What are all your strange habits and flaws.

You see i'm not an easy person,better to say I'm a special person. And if a guy wants to be with me and stays for a long time. Than I think he most really love me. That's the harsh feedback I got about me in my life. the feeback came from the ex boyfriend (virgo) of my mom.

To choose is not so difficult. Buth will you get your choice? In my life I usually don't get it.
Positively, maybe I made the wrong choice and I was protected by not getting it. Buth is leaves you
very lonely and so I always look for a way living without love. As good as it gets, it's not easy.

posted December 06, 2010 01:59 PM            

i am so glad you have come to this place and space in your life. some of us never get there, but i would SOOOO rather live with myself and maybe some pets than with someone i can't relax and be myself with. even as a roomate some people are impossible to feel "safe" around, while others know how to live and let live...