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posted December 24, 2010 10:14 AM            

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A friend of mine was dating a guy she met over the internet a while ago. Long story short...

she got burned.

If you meet someone over the net, be careful if they constantly brag about themselves (I'm rich, I'm beautiful, I'm smart, talented yada yada etc.), it could just as well be the very things he/she is insecure about or even lacking irl. And be careful who you show your photos to and where you post them. There's some seriously messed up people in this world.

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posted December 24, 2010 10:20 AM            

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many people are online unknown to themselves and the people they meet online...google is a great reference engine if you want to see if there is anything nasty out there...but it is always good if you are going to MEET your online buddies to have it in a situation where you can LEAVE quickly, and that is in public at least at first. there are also online detective sites that will cough up a great deal of info for very little money...

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posted December 24, 2010 10:34 AM            

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Thanks Kat, good tip.

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Posts: 695
From: The Beach
Registered: Apr 2009

posted December 24, 2010 11:59 AM            

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Internet or not, some people can be very deceptive. The internet can make it much easier, though.

I find on forums where people don't use there real names it can be even worse. People that can use any name they want sometimes don't feel accountable for their word or actions and don't feel like they have to adhere by normal standards of behavior. They also don't have to worry about what their "real life" friends and family think if they spout off about nonsense because of almost complete anonymity.

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Posts: 8284
From: The Goober Galaxy
Registered: Apr 2009

posted December 25, 2010 07:16 PM            

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You're preaching to the choir on that one, MoonWitch. Testify, my sister! lol

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"The stars which shone over Babylon and the stable in Bethlehem still shine as brightly over the Empire State Building and your front yard today. They perform their cycles with the same mathematical precision, and they will continue to affect each thing on earth, including man, as long as the earth exists." Linda Goodman

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posted December 25, 2010 07:43 PM            

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I've always felt accountable for my words and actions, but then I've never seen the internet as separate from real-life.

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Posts: 695
From: The Beach
Registered: Apr 2009

posted December 25, 2010 09:04 PM            

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I don't either, teasel. Some people use the internet mask as an excuse, unfortunately.

For instance, i run into far less drama at places like Facebook than on forums where no one really knows who the other people are. Not saying it's all bad, of course.

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Posts: 9399
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010

posted December 25, 2010 09:30 PM            

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I could be wrong but I think I can FEEL people out on here.

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Jesus never put his trust in man cuz he knew what was in man.
Pluto conjunct Deja ,Bruh.

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From: Mars
Registered: Aug 2010

posted December 25, 2010 09:30 PM            

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Just an idea, but there's probably less drama on facebook, because people generally know each other, or each other's friends, better than an anonymous forum like this.

There's a comfort level that's not present, until people get to know each other.

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Posts: 8284
From: The Goober Galaxy
Registered: Apr 2009

posted December 25, 2010 09:37 PM            

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I'm always myself on here.

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From: The Beach
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posted December 25, 2010 09:43 PM            

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quote:

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Originally posted by Randall:
I'm always myself on here.

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I believe you. There are plenty of genuine people and I totally get why people would want aliases sometimes. Im just saying that there are some people that use the anonymity in an abusive way.

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Posts: 695
From: The Beach
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posted December 25, 2010 09:46 PM            

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quote:

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Originally posted by PlutoSquared:
Just an idea, but there's probably less drama on facebook, because people generally know each other, or each other's friends, better than an anonymous forum like this.

There's a comfort level that's not present, until people get to know each other.

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Somewhat.

But I belong to "groups" on Facebook that have most of the same people that used to post on other forums 10 years ago. There was a LOT more drama on the boards where people used made up names and where they weren't connected to their "real life" in a way. There are many of them that have much better behavior and are far far less likely to flame or spout nonsense when others see their real names, their photos, some of their personal lives so to speak.

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Posts: 695
From: The Beach
Registered: Apr 2009

posted December 25, 2010 09:47 PM            

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I have actually been thinking about writing about this in mu blog for some time now. . Maybe this is more incentive.

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Posts: 4338
From: Mars
Registered: Aug 2010

posted December 25, 2010 09:49 PM            

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There are many of them that have much better behavior and are far far less likely to flame or spout nonsense when others see their real names, their photos, some of their personal lives so to speak.

That's what I'm including in that "comfort" factor...

When you can see someone's picture, their name, etc... there's sort of an open ability that people can use to gauge whether or not they want to interact with someone else...

We don't have that here.

Essentially, we're talking to anonymous people that we may or may not choose in real life to associate with, if we were to bump into them in real life.

It's like putting blind cats in a bag together.

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Posts: 1314
From: Down the Rabbit Hole
Registered: Jun 2009

posted December 25, 2010 09:49 PM            

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Moonwitch,

I agree. I found the (very) few LLers that I have interacted with outside of this site and let into my personal life (& vice versa) to be very rational people who usually don't get into trouble on here. They are the real deal, very genuine and cool folks.

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Posts: 4338
From: Mars
Registered: Aug 2010

posted December 25, 2010 09:59 PM            

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I would probably go as far to say, that I am probably more of myself in an anonymous forum than I am on my facebook account...

I have family and old friends that are somewhat set in their ways, and I honor the history by keeping my account open, and reading other's updates.

On Lindaland, I am as direct as possible. Unless someone speaks up and tells me otherwise.

Regardless, I don't think this is necessarily an issue of who is more genuine vs. deceptive... I think this is a different aspect to people coming out under different circumstances.

Even the trolls are probably genuinely expressing a true side of themselves - malice or bitterness, in an environment where they feel comfortable.

Just more food for thought.

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Posts: 9399
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010

posted December 25, 2010 10:03 PM            

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I was on another Board and did not trust people like I trust people here.

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Posts: 4338
From: Mars
Registered: Aug 2010

posted December 25, 2010 10:05 PM            

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Also, anonymous posting is good in the way that it allows us to share our pain, or shame, and our embarassment in an environment that has the least amount of detriment to our personal lives - people are CRUEL in real life when equipped with personal information.

There are posters here that have shared their lives of divorce, death, rape, incest, std's, etc. etc.

A basic referencing to High School brings to mind, a girl that I knew who was diagnosed with Herpes... she told one friend, and within a week's time, everyone knew - and punished her for it by treating her like an outcast.

Anonymous posting is a mixed bag of goodies.

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Posts: 695
From: The Beach
Registered: Apr 2009

posted December 25, 2010 10:17 PM            

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quote:

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Anonymous posting is a mixed bag of goodies.[/B]

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True. You bring up some good points.

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Posts: 3601
From: Pluto, next to Ami Ann
Registered: Jul 2010

posted December 25, 2010 10:24 PM            

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man, it is so funny how soulful made this thread because not too long ago i was thinking about how differently people you know in person act or seem online....like some of my friends from school are my friends on FB and a couple act totally different or seem totally different than how i know them and sometimes for me its a little hard to differentiate and i begin to wonder why i'm a friend of a person like this if they behave seemingly negative

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put your foot down once, not stomp it over and over

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Posts: 8284
From: The Goober Galaxy
Registered: Apr 2009

posted December 25, 2010 10:26 PM            

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One might say that the anonymous nature of Lindaland combined with the personal nature of the topics creates an openness that actually leads to a bonding of sorts...a closeness by osmosis...an unintentional byproduct that is induced by the anonymity.

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Posts: 4338
From: Mars
Registered: Aug 2010

posted December 25, 2010 10:28 PM            

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P2

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Posts: 9399
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010

posted December 25, 2010 10:29 PM            

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YES
It is the charts.They give an intimacy I have not found ,elsewhere.

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Jesus never put his trust in man cuz he knew what was in man.
Pluto conjunct Deja ,Bruh.

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Posts: 3601
From: Pluto, next to Ami Ann
Registered: Jul 2010

posted December 25, 2010 10:30 PM            

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LOL, well if i did something like that then i'd use male characters....just saying in fighting games i use male characters...mostly because they'r stronger than the female characters

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put your foot down once, not stomp it over and over

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Posts: 9399
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010

posted December 25, 2010 10:36 PM            

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edit

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