posted January 14, 2012 11:38 AM            

And by "attraction factor" I mean the good looks.

Yes, I'm one of those women who won't do "beer belly" "smell like an ash tray" kind of man. Even if you paid me to date him once.

BUT unlike men, women have this kind of emotional maturity that allows them to see through an average-looking person, recognize something else (called "attraction" or chemistry) and perhaps -if it's strong enough- go for it. Sure, there are men like that too, but the average Joe won't think about inner beauty first.

In my opinion, it's a myth that women don't pay attention to looks. It could have been true in older generations when women would marry through arranged marriage or just to have kids and/or safety, but nowadays women have more options. It still is important that the "pretty boy" also can provide a safe home for the forthcoming children, and women are created by nature to think of children (regardless of whether they indeed have them or not - it's called "nesting") but looks or at least attraction certainly factors in.

posted January 15, 2012 03:49 AM            

Anyway, it's a bit absurd to say that THIS IS WHAT ALL WOMEN ARE LOOKING FOR. Because not all women are alike and many women may actually have more in common with stereotypical men than stereotypical women. Articles like this really annoy me lol.

Honestly, I like attractive men. I don't even consider guys dateable if they're not attractive. I tend to date up not down in terms of attractiveness. I don't mind being the less attractive partner in a relationship.

I also don't nest. I don't want kids really. I don't care if the dude works at a coffee shop. Guys with big careers and money tend to have different world views than me anyway. Corporate slaves are unattractive to me for a lot of reasons. Idk.

posted January 18, 2012 04:56 AM            

Personally, I think that it honestly depends on the woman. Some women do care about looks. Other women care about maybe a certain area, but are able to overlook others/don't care about other areas. Other women just don't really care at all and do look at personality more than looks. It also sometimes happens that someone who seems unappealing at first glance becomes more attractive as a woman gets to know him--his inner handsomeness starts to manifest on the outside. Obviously, he won't literally transform (unless he gives himself a makeover or otherwise changes his appearance), but his better features will start to stand out more and his inner attractiveness will start to really come out.

I also think that, while many people might have a 'type', (a) others have no type and (b) even those with a type will sometimes use this type as a set of guidelines and will be open to stepping outside of that box.

I personally couldn't see myself wanting to be with someone whom I found repulsive or disgusting, but, on the other hand, I honestly would prefer to be "the pretty one", if I were going to be in a relationship. That is, I'd want to be the more attractive of the two. Not sure why. Maybe Venus in Scorpio wanting to have the upper hand a little bit, at least in this area?

------------------
*I use the whole sign system*

Personal Planets:
Sun, Mercury: Libra
Venus: Scorpio
Moon: Cancer
Mars: Capricorn

posted January 18, 2012 05:18 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by AcousticGod:

I think this extends to making life beautiful, you know? If life is great with the person you're with then it's not as much about the looks or whether your partner fits some mold, but rather it's that the union brings out the beauty both of you enjoy together. That's why nice guys can do just fine, because it's not always about some conception of masculinity. It's confidence.

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posted January 18, 2012 06:40 AM            

Randall, LMAO!!!! What goes into your look!! Ami's right, you're cute.

posted January 18, 2012 01:18 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by jesstar:
first time ive read this thread and i feel kinda stupid now lol i just started a "super hero " thread lastnight because i have a crush on a "nerd boy" anyhow to each their own . ive known enough women in my life to know we all dont consider the same men attractive ,handsome or goregous. thats just silly. my lovers have been drop dead goregous in my eyes ,hence the instant attraction .yet not everyone sees them as i do ( thank goodness )

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posted January 18, 2012 02:00 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by mockingbird:

I agree. It takes a(n informed, passionate, intelligent) talker to get to me

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posted February 08, 2012 06:53 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Ami Anne:

Some guys make you feel really beautiful.
This is prolly the biggest thing to make any guy attractive to woman.
The woman feels beautiful around him.

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posted February 14, 2012 06:37 AM            

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quote:

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Remember, love can conquer the influences of the planets....It can even eliminate karma.

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posted February 14, 2012 07:47 AM            

There is more but those are the basics.

Physical things:
1.
CLEANLINESS
2.
No drunks/druggies

After all that,
I do not really care.
If there is chemistry there is chemistry,
no matter the physical appearance.
I do however tend to avoid short haired men,
and men with southern American accents, because they scare me,
and were the types who raped, and abused me.
However,
I would not automatically say no go to a short hair, nor yes to a long hair.
It would depend on the overall person.

Perfection/beauty
is a nice perk,
but not a requirement.

posted February 14, 2012 11:30 AM            

"Go shine your shoes" "Go iron your shirt again" "Your coat is wrinkled"

"Why aren't you wearing that?" "Yuck, you're wearing *that*??" "You are *wearing* that? Who are you 'doing' in the office?"

She's a Leo. Of course she cares an extreme amount about how I look! Looks are supremely important to her.

posted May 27, 2012 12:21 AM            

I went to a formal dance with a weird looking guy in college. Beforehand, I had told my friends that I was thinking of dating him, in spite of his looks. He was smart and funny and had good manners.

Well he showed up for the dance looking ridiculous. That was inconsiderate. Game over.

posted May 27, 2012 04:54 AM            

What matters to me,
Loyalty
Intelligence
Ambition
Hardwork
Humility
Honesty
Self love
And the most important of all is that he should deeply, widely & highly love me.

posted May 27, 2012 06:02 AM            

quote:

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But that doesn't mean I'll put up with someone whose teeth shine like the Sun.

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posted May 27, 2012 09:30 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Hera:
I couldn't find myself attracted to a shorter guy that is bald.

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Are you sure it's the physical feature or could it instead be the lack of confidence men tend to feel over these features?

What about Seth Green? There are debates on his actual size (even Seth contradicts himself on this topic) but he's between 5' (152cm)-5'4 (160cm) doesn't seem to let it bother him and many women find him hot. In case you haven't seen him here is in Buffy the Vampire Slayer:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B_RayCxhaKI

And as for bald, there's Gunn in Angel and Robin Wood in Buffy, though granted I don't think they're naturally bald but rather shave their head. There's still Vin Diesel (for the women who prefer macho alphas) and Patrick Stewart (for those who prefer the sensitive men) and I think they're both naturally bald but not bothered by it. Does their self-confidence make a difference?

Conversely is it what OTHERS perceive? That is you might make an exception for the examples I listed because they're celebrities as your coolness factor would skyrocket while those you know would otherwise think you were "settling" if you got a short or bald guy who wasn't rich & famous (ie, in this case it's not the physical feature nor the issue of confidence in the man).

Unfortunately I'm demisexual so I can't say just how sexy I find these examples...though I think they all look awesome and even without their fame I'd happily have any of them as escorts (even if Seth is smaller than me).

posted May 27, 2012 11:39 PM            

quote:

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Are you sure it's the physical feature or could it instead be the lack of confidence men tend to feel over these features?

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From the guys you listed, I only find Seth attractive and I still don't know if I would date him even though he's famous. It's also the fact that he makes a good couple with Willow, who is also on the smaller frame. I am not. Nice to see a Buffy/Angel fan though!

I am not saying I wouldn't give a guy a chance at all. I did say I dated short and bald. But it is not what I want, not what I *really* want. It took me quite a while to get here and stop delluding myself that looks are not important. They are. I am judged for my looks and I judge others for theirs. And why would I go into something half way, it will only go badly. I can stay friends with them instead of complicating both our lives with something that I know will never work because I won't enter it wholeheartedly.

posted May 28, 2012 09:27 AM            

Overweight :
I'd a crush on an overweight guy.
I turned down an overweight guy. This fellow was a rich & influential alpha male, yet failed to impress.

Skinny :
The only guy I was close to falling in love with was a skinny Virgo.
I'd issues with another guy because I found him too thin.(this fellow's heavier than the previous one)

Short :
An ex was short & I didn't care much.
Another ex was short but that HURT my ego!

I'm very particular about teeth!

The Virgo was a super sensitive, shy thing. Whereas every other guy is an alpha male. So I don't even know whether it's their personalities or looks that I found unappealing.