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Author
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Topic: I am so depressed..
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Doux Rêve
Moderator Posts: 2162
From:
Registered: Dec 2010
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posted December 27, 2011 10:41 AM
  
I think I have Seasonal Affective Disorder, due to the winter and lack of light, etc, but whatever it is.. I've been feeling so down lately.
I have a hard time falling asleep at night, I have nightmares and I when I wake up in the morning I don't feel like doing anything. I just lay in bed and wish I didn't exist. The same feelings keep haunting me, I feel empty, lost, confused. I've never cried so much in my life, I just burst into tears for no apparent reason.. I don't go out, I push everyone away, I hurt people around me.. but I just can't help it.
I don't see the light anymore, only darkness everywhere.. I feel so lonely, lost and just.. there's this void inside of me that I can't get rid of.. Everything seems so pointless.. I wish I were strong, but I'm not, and everyday reminds me of the failure that I am. I am so tired of this  Anyway.. if you've read this, thank you for your time.. and sorry for the negativity, I just felt like I needed to let it out somehow..
Oh and, happy holidays to you all, I hope you're feeling better than I am.
IP: Logged |
Chahldean
Moderator Posts: 193
From: Everywhere I've Been
Registered: Jun 2009
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posted December 27, 2011 12:11 PM
Halo Doux Reve~You are Worth every feeling You are having and Word you wrote...as sharing such emotion with Others is healthier for You than You think! These pangs of mortality and Being Human transpire in All of Us, at One time or another in our Lives....
so, although you may feel lonely, You are not alone my Dear. We are hear. Each step of the Way....all One needs to do is reach out....and You have.  The Path you are on is is consuming indeed....as depression and helplessness feeds itself ad nauseum with what appears to be no end in sight. These feelings may be attributed to many things...as you have indicated the weather, the change of seasons, the holidays...They all feed into this behavior and emptiness in Human Beings. Nutrition is also important as one must maintain the proper minerals and vitamins to help boost the natural immune system our bodies survive on. Vitamin C and Niacin help tremendously in balancing these symptoms. Finally, there is Energy and Change.
Energy is inert in these circumstances unless One activates it....with the old adage if
"Nothing changes, nothing changes" One must dig deep into Your Divine Resources of Self worth and Righteousness...find how Beautiful You are and transfigure yourself into Your Self.
I Trust and Know You can do this! It is the True test of Time and Humanity in All of Us
and I know You can Win this minor battle you are suffering from....You are Worth IT!  ------------------
Gnosis ThySelf Knowledge bows to Spirit IP: Logged |
NativelyJoan
Knowflake Posts: 1098
From: New England
Registered: Sep 2011
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posted December 27, 2011 12:16 PM
Doux Reve, that sounds terrible. Don't feel bad about sharing, it's better to express what your feeling instead of suffering alone in silence. I've had passing bouts of depression also for most of my life. I've also been to some pretty dark places however I truly believe in order to know truth you have to know darkness and lightness. What you're going through is just a passing moment of despair, it will pass in time. Use this time to better understand yourself, your wants, needs and desires, what you are searching for deep within. What in your life is leading you to feel lost or empty inside. Even in this place of darkness, try to find things that uplift you. If there are things that give you peace like taking a walk near a river or ocean, or sitting alone in a room, whatever it be that engages you and allows your mind and your emotions to find peace. This is a time period where you're truly connected to the darkest depths of yourself, and it's a prime opportunity to better understand who you are as a person. We all go through these moments, it's apart of our nature. Life isn't always going to be blissful, however we can make experiencing the not so pleasant emotions by redefining the way we view them and working wholeheartedly through the way we experience them. Equanimity comes with growth and understanding. Once we are able to understand our drives, thoughts and emotions, we can naturally experience them while fully understanding them with a healthy emotional detachment. Which will makes us even more effective at helping others. Don't worry use this moment of despair to your own advantage. Use this experience to better understand who you are and what you truly need and desire. IP: Logged |
LEXX
Knowflake Posts: 9742
From: Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat.......& LEXIGRAMMING.♥.. is my Passion!
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 27, 2011 12:54 PM
Doux Rêve
Apologies here,
I am too exhausted to make a long reply at the moment.
I just want you know that I care and totally understand.
Message me at fb if you want.
I will check in here and there after I rest a spell.
{{{hugs}}}
Love
LEXX
xoxoxo------------------
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ IP: Logged |
lechien
Knowflake Posts: 1980
From: in a giant room with 2 little furry friends
Registered: May 2009
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posted December 27, 2011 02:41 PM
(((hugs)))IP: Logged |
Randall
Webmaster Posts: 22150
From: Saturn next to Charmainec
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 27, 2011 02:52 PM
You will feel better if you take Vitamin D.------------------
"Never mentally imagine for another that which you would not want to experience for yourself, since the mental image you send out inevitably comes back to you." Rebecca Clark IP: Logged |
LEXX
Knowflake Posts: 9742
From: Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat.......& LEXIGRAMMING.♥.. is my Passion!
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 27, 2011 03:27 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Randall:
You will feel better if you take Vitamin D.
YES!!!!!!!!!!!!
I have noticed it does help mood to a degree! 
And B12.
And C.------------------
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ IP: Logged |
Doux Rêve
Moderator Posts: 2162
From:
Registered: Dec 2010
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posted December 27, 2011 04:22 PM
You guys are so wonderful.. Thank you so much, each one of you.It really helps. I will try my best to follow your advice and hold on. (((hugs))) 
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starfox
Moderator Posts: 877
From: London England
Registered: Aug 2010
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posted December 27, 2011 04:43 PM
Do you have a lightbox? a friend had SAD and always used her lightbox in the winter.IP: Logged |
Doux Rêve
Moderator Posts: 2162
From:
Registered: Dec 2010
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posted December 27, 2011 05:00 PM
No, sadly I don't.
I read that it can have negative effects on the eyesight, so I'm kind of wary of it..IP: Logged |
ElizabethO
Knowflake Posts: 471
From:
Registered: Nov 2011
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posted December 27, 2011 05:09 PM
HUGS. In addition to what everyone said above, you should get those lightbulbs that emulate the sun. It may not solve everything, but it's a good start to make yourself feel better physically so you can focus on taking care of yourself emotionally and spiritually. I think it's called Light Therapy IP: Logged |
Doux Rêve
Moderator Posts: 2162
From:
Registered: Dec 2010
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posted December 27, 2011 05:24 PM
Thank you, Elizabeth.I will see what I can do. xo IP: Logged |
Randall
Webmaster Posts: 22150
From: Saturn next to Charmainec
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 27, 2011 05:41 PM
It's not that D is a mood elevator as such, but when low to no sunlight leads to depression (SAD), it's a D deficiency.------------------
"Never mentally imagine for another that which you would not want to experience for yourself, since the mental image you send out inevitably comes back to you." Rebecca Clark IP: Logged |
T
Knowflake Posts: 7127
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 27, 2011 11:14 PM
Wishing you better days ahead.
I can relate with everything you said.Agree that vitamin D3 may help too. & get sun when you can.  IP: Logged |
Fondue Knight
Knowflake Posts: 819
From: NY
Registered: Nov 2011
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posted December 28, 2011 12:23 AM
I feel for you, gurl. I'm pretty sure I get seasonal depression as well. This year it's merged with my unemployment depression. FUN FUN FUN!!!1  IP: Logged |
Venus
Moderator Posts: 1569
From:
Registered: Mar 2011
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posted December 28, 2011 01:48 AM
Doux Rêve, i totally feel you.. i have been fighting overwhelming grief for the past two weeks, a year ago (a year from the 24th) my dad went into a coma from which he never woke up.. and now with the season back thats all i can think off 24/7 its soo hard to see the light in some situations and ur drowned in a pool of sh*t..i promised myself i wouldnt sulk in my self-pity as i have throughout the past year, someday you just have to strap on your work boots draw a smile and take it like it is.. how i see it life is tougher on people with tender hearts.. but "...life is a victory for the strong in spirits.." KJ you and I, we have strong spirits.. just wait it out, thats what im doing IP: Logged |
RegardesPlatero
Moderator Posts: 4366
From: Storybrooke, Mr. Gold's Shop
Registered: Sep 2011
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posted December 28, 2011 05:26 AM
I just want to send out some good energy to anyone and everyone suffering from depression right now, whatever the cause of it may be. IP: Logged |
sand
Knowflake Posts: 6997
From:
Registered: May 2011
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posted December 28, 2011 07:29 AM
quote:
Originally posted by starfox:
Do you have a lightbox? a friend had SAD and always used her lightbox in the winter.
is this a lightbox? i saw it in a furniture store tho so maybe you are talking of something else.  hate the -ber months this year too. IP: Logged |
starfox
Moderator Posts: 877
From: London England
Registered: Aug 2010
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posted December 28, 2011 07:34 AM
quote:
Originally posted by sand:
is this a lightbox? i saw it in a furniture store tho so maybe you are talking of something else. hate the -ber months this year too.
I don't think that is one? but I can't tell from just a picture. These are modern versions. http://www.sadbox.co.uk/light-boxes-c-43.html IP: Logged |
Doux Rêve
Moderator Posts: 2162
From:
Registered: Dec 2010
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posted December 28, 2011 10:57 AM
Thank you, T, Fondue, Venus, Regardes and all the others, you are such sweethearts.I am sorry to hear that some of you are going through hard times as well, but at the same time I feel less lonely. My heart still aches and I feel like the pain will never leave.. But knowing that I'm not alone helps, a little bit. Please take care of yourselves, hold on and keep up the hope, things will eventually get better (at least I hope so..).
Much love to you all
And thank you again for the support. IP: Logged |
LEXX
Knowflake Posts: 9742
From: Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat.......& LEXIGRAMMING.♥.. is my Passion!
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 28, 2011 11:53 AM
Doux Rêve {{{hugs}}}------------------
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ IP: Logged |
Doux Rêve
Moderator Posts: 2162
From:
Registered: Dec 2010
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posted December 28, 2011 09:28 PM
Thank you Lexx, you are so lovely ((hugs))IP: Logged |
LEXX
Knowflake Posts: 9742
From: Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat.......& LEXIGRAMMING.♥.. is my Passion!
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 29, 2011 12:17 AM
Doux Rêve
You are a sweetheart and you have often given me cause to smile.
Thank you!{{{hugs}}}
Sorry I do not tell you that often enough.
I can be so damn addle brained at times. 
Like I will see something you post, and think,
nice, or sweet,
then smile,
but duh me,
not reply or say anything.
I do that in real life too.
Someone will say something and I will be smiling or laughing like crazy inside my mind,
but then forget to vocalize it and sit there like a dolt.
Me and my brain farts LOL!PS.
My facebook is screwing up.
You are not showing up on my friend list.
A few others were not either.....some glitch.
Let me know please.
------------------
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ IP: Logged |
Doux Rêve
Moderator Posts: 2162
From:
Registered: Dec 2010
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posted December 29, 2011 07:53 AM
Aww Lexx thank you so much for your kindness  You bring a smile on my face! ((hugs))
I will send you a message on FB then, to let you know. xx
IP: Logged |
LEXX
Knowflake Posts: 9742
From: Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat.......& LEXIGRAMMING.♥.. is my Passion!
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 29, 2011 12:52 PM
Doux Rêve
Thank you PS.
No fb message yet.
fb has been messing up for me.
http://facebook.com/cyfairy
------------------
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ PS.
Smiling here!
Just got your fb message! IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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