posted March 08, 2012 08:20 PM            

You are probably not the only woman Mister Husband has made a pass at behind your sister's back. I suspect your sister knows this. Even if she can't admit it to herself, she probably senses it. He disrespects her by lying, so he probably doesn't respect her in other ways as well.

Some insecure women can't face that they've picked a loser (and might have to be alone if they break up), so they take out their anger and betrayal on other women. It has absolutely nothing to do with you and everything to do with their internal problems.

My accusatory friend was exactly like this... apparently after she got through with me, she went on to wreck every female friendship she had over "man drama." In the end it almost wasn't even about the man, it was just proving that she could be "better than" other women. But she had such a well of self-hate that it was never enough, and the cycle would start back up all over again. I almost feel sorry for her. But I won't talk to her or engage with her again.

posted March 09, 2012 03:35 AM            

My mom went through similar situations with two of her sisters. She told them both that something was peculiar about their husbands and they both accused her of being jealous. These idiots chose their husbands, who they only knew for a few years in comparison to their whole lives with my mom, and ended up catching them cheating with either a close friend or co-worker.

Before any of this happened, one of their husbands came onto my mom. The other made comments about my body in front of my aunt when I was 11! Both were present for the disgusting events and chose to ignore their actions.

posted March 09, 2012 09:17 AM            

quote:

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Your sister knows that she's made the wrong choice and is looking for someone to take it out on.

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posted March 09, 2012 03:11 PM            

Can't choose your family ... Your only way out is probably to turn away because this whole ordeal is very toxic. Trying to fix things or talk things out would probably just make it worse.

Try the very best you can to not let her false accusations get to you because otherwise you might get very ill, mentally & physically.

posted March 10, 2012 01:43 AM            

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quote:

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Remember, love can conquer the influences of the planets....It can even eliminate karma.

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posted March 10, 2012 02:13 AM            

And she sure doesn't sound like the type of person you can get through to with talks.. sorry I know that sounds judgmental..

If you can, try to go out for awhile, go to a friend's, a library, or shopping etc. On days you don't wanna leave the house, maybe go to your room and lock the door. Keep yourself busy. These are some of the things I did to separate myself from a toxic family member. Going through this constant same old, same old can't be too good for your health. Gotta think about yourself for now, 'cause she sure as hell don't sound like she's thinking about your feelings. :/

Hope things will get better for you guys one day..

posted March 13, 2012 07:22 AM            

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Originally posted by Randall:
That sucks, Teasel. BTW, if anyone quotes, I will still be able to edit it out.

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Thank you. I appreciate that.

I only saw your responses today. My sister is usually great in just about every respect. Her problem with me is that I don't want to be around him in person - that I think he'll make another pass at me if he's around me, and she wants me to say that I'm wrong about him. I don't know that I am, because it ended up being a problem each time. So once again, I'm wrong and he's an angel, because she got over it, and I still haven't.

She forgets that I didn't want to be around anyone, and that I've put off my own friends who have wanted to visit. I am in a very different place than I was a year ago, let alone two years ago, and I was in a bad way a year ago. this is not the time to be pushing boundaries. I am extremely depressed, and angry, as well as just plain lost.

I'm going to delete these posts later, so thanks again Randall for the offer to delete any quoted parts. I literally almost walked away from everything last wednesday. I now know how some people end up homeless. I literally feel repulsive and empty, and if anyone else wants to take a whack at me, I just won't be around anymore.

posted March 13, 2012 10:27 AM            

Again, I'm reminded of the fact that my relationship with her was never worth fighting for. I brought up an incident in which he was sober and was rude to me, but according to her, he was either drunk or it didn't happen. She couldn't stand up for me at any time, otherwise she would have lost him. I was expected to always be there, and just get over things. She's ordering me to get over it, calling me names, bringing up other things that have nothing to do with this fight, just to hurt me. At the moment, i think she's pathetic. consistently having to defend myself, when I'm not in the wrong, having to defend my feelings that are invalidated.

posted March 17, 2012 02:43 PM            

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted March 18, 2012 08:35 AM            

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted March 18, 2012 11:44 AM            

Just because they are family does not give them the right to use and abuse me.
I am sad over what could have been but not over what was,
which was not good for the most part, and some outright horrible to say the least.

posted March 18, 2012 06:23 PM            

This society lends us to believe that blood is thicker than water, not always

In answer to your topic question, alot, unfortunately ALOT of women are insecure. Many times a man will come between women without anything really happening, it is seen and experienced over and over.

You have our support, you are the one in truth~

blessings