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Author
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Topic: being patient with mentally challenged people
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aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 4883
From: tennessee
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted December 14, 2012 02:19 PM
  
i have a neighbor who is severely autistic and he drives me up the wall. i know he cant help it and i feel bad for him but i cant stand being around him. i cant step outside my door without him being right in my face saying "hi dusty, hi dusty, hi dusty!" or when i get home from work he runs over and stands in front of my car door and tries talking to me. most of the time i
feel stalked lol, i literally cant
step out of my door without him
appearing a few seconds
later"hi dusty hi dusty, how are
you how are you how are you"
he repeats everything he says
lol. ever seen one of those nature shows where the crocodile is laying on the bank watching the water and quickly gets in when he spots something? well my autistic neighbor is like that crocodile lol. i ignore him mostly but sometimes i end up yelling at him and i feel bad, i did this morning. anybody here work with mentally challenged people or have relatives that are? how do you keep your patience and sanity? IP: Logged |
Xiiro
Moderator Posts: 1366
From: San Diego CA, USA
Registered: Jun 2011
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posted December 14, 2012 03:57 PM
I grew up around people with a huge range of different developmental disabilities. I have also worked in a living community for people with moderate to severe developmental situations. There are several factors to consider with your neighbor. One minor thing to get out of the way is the fact that some people react to people with disabilities in a hostile or adverse way, because they are frightened. They fear the vulnerability represented by the developmentally different person. Fear can arise out of not comprehending exactly what the disabled person is going through (or being forced to imagine their self in that state), which results in wanting them to just go away. As an Aquarius, I assume you don't need to be told that the world is made up of all kinds of people and each of us has a unique value we bring to the table. That doesn't stop at people who are socially challenged or even socially incapable. People with developmental issues generally teach the insane majority that our conventions and obsessive projection exists to mask an undeniable innocence and vulnerability. They teach us that we are not in control and that our obsession with control turns out to be where we are developmentally challenged. The biggest thing to keep in mind is the fact that your neighbor is likely not trying to bother you intentionally. When you yell at him or tell him you are not interested, there are cases where the meaning behind those words don't register. I think it is also important to remember that you are probably not dealing with someone who's internal age matches his external appearance. If you consider your neighbor may have the psychological development of an 6 year old, you may begin to get a better perspective of the situation. You can't just tell a 6 year old that you are late for work, because the value of that sentence isn't comparable to something they understand. Good News! if your neighbor is autistic, there are certain rules that just don't apply. One reason you may be frustrated is because you feel imposed upon, but don't want to respond in a rude way. For many people on the severe (and sometimes light) end of the autistic spectrum, "rude" doesn't make sense. Of course yelling at the person or harming them is not the appropriate way to deal with the situation, but less socially appropriate communication could make more sense to certain autistic people than social politeness. There is nothing wrong with smiling, interrupting them with a kind tone, while they are talking saying, "Bob I need you to move, you are blocking my door", and opening your door gently toward them so you can get out. If you are unable to stay and have a conversation, just tell him you have something important to do, but you will see him later. He may keep talking, but may not be phased if you go on about your business. He will likely not get offended if you put your needs before his desire to have a conversation. In some cases being rational and to the point (not emotional and personally effected) makes perfect sense. Some autistic people have difficulty with touch, so gently reaching in their direction to touch their arm, may automatically cause them to move out of your way. If he doesn't move you can touch his arm and gently prompt him out of the way. Another thing to consider is autism often externally manifests as dissociative behavior pared with obsessive compulsive fixation. In some cases the dissociation and fixation are results of external stimuli overload (hence the reason some autistic folks dislike touch). Your neighbor likely repeats himself obsessively because it gives him some sort of command over being bombarded with hyper-vivid external data. Aside from that, he is just another person who longs for friendship and interaction with others. Finally, you could just take some time out of your day to have a conversation with him. Even if the conversation is difficult for you. The fact that he is social is good and though you may have places to go and people to see, he is not a non-entity, he's your neighbor. Taking the time to be neighborly and accepting is a gift to a person who is used to people treating them as if they are inherently annoying for things over which they have no control. Finding out more about him could give you more insight into how to deal with him better and it could give him some of the friendship he seems to so desperately want. If you haven't seen these, check them out.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U_GXVzZ0Unk
and http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KmDGvquzn2k IP: Logged |
somethingexcellent
Knowflake Posts: 68
From: england
Registered: Nov 2012
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posted December 14, 2012 05:57 PM
It's hard to deal with someone who isn't on the same level as you. It can be tiring if they're below you and it can be tiring if they're above you. I don't fault someone for being frustrated or angry with another person with, in this case, autism. It takes a toll.Call me heartless or callous (I really am), but I don't like to deal with people who have low functioning mental disabilities. I think they're a person just as deserving of whatever treatment """"normal"""" people get, but I don't have the patience. I simply don't and I'm not afraid to admit it.
I won't chase them away with a pitchfork and torch or anything! I'll talk with them, yes, but the care aspect is what bogs me down. IP: Logged |
hippichick
Moderator Posts: 2078
From:
Registered: May 2009
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posted December 14, 2012 06:09 PM
I wonder about the caretakers who let these type of "challenged" folks out into the public, alone, facing misunderstandins, etc.There is a MR boy who walks our neighborhood..he is way not right. My youngest went to school with him. But his parents send him to walk 2 miles to the bus stop everyday to go "somewhere?" I dont think this young man is harmful but I wonder what harm could come to him... IP: Logged |
aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 4883
From: tennessee
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted December 14, 2012 07:08 PM
quote:
Originally posted by hippichick:
I wonder about the caretakers who let these type of "challenged" folks out into the public, alone, facing misunderstandins, etc.There is a MR boy who walks our neighborhood..he is way not right. My youngest went to school with him. But his parents send him to walk 2 miles to the bus stop everyday to go "somewhere?"
I dont think this young man is harmful but I wonder
what harm could come to him...
exactly! my neighbors just let him roam around outside with no supervision. he was caught masturbating in another neighbors house.IP: Logged |
sand
Knowflake Posts: 8007
From: Lake Como next to George Clooney's House
Registered: May 2011
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posted December 14, 2012 09:32 PM
It's v v hard. My uncle is schizoid. I will have to take care of him one day. But I suppose they are given to people who can idk.. Nah that's BS lol but I'd like to think so.. I have an autistic cousin born to a couple of cardiologists.. He does the same thing.. The repetitive hi's. kind of like blues clues too. My other cousin is annoyed as hell with him coz he doesn't understand y people find mental retardation cute lol! I suppose it isn't. Just making light of a bad situation. IP: Logged |
sand
Knowflake Posts: 8007
From: Lake Como next to George Clooney's House
Registered: May 2011
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posted December 14, 2012 09:38 PM
quote:
Originally posted by hippichick:
I wonder about the caretakers who let these type of "challenged" folks out into the public, alone, facing misunderstandins, etc.There is a MR boy who walks our neighborhood..he is way not right. My youngest went to school with him. But his parents send him to walk 2 miles to the bus stop everyday to go "somewhere?" I dont think this young man is harmful but I wonder what harm could come to him...
My uncle, when he was much younger, used to watch this game show. This game show was a cab ride away from his house. On some Sundays he would runaway and cajole a cab driver to take him to the studio. He appeared on that show once lol! But yes because he is gigantic some days he would get beat up because people were afraid of him. I have no idea how they took care of him though coz I was v v young then like 8 or so. I just remember he would always slip by everyone. He is a Pisces. IP: Logged |
sand
Knowflake Posts: 8007
From: Lake Como next to George Clooney's House
Registered: May 2011
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posted December 14, 2012 09:47 PM
quote:
Originally posted by aquaguy91:
[QUOTE]Originally posted by hippichick:
[b]I wonder about the caretakers who let these type of "challenged" folks out into the public, alone, facing misunderstandins, etc.There is a MR boy who walks our neighborhood..he is way not right. My youngest went to school with him. But his parents send him to walk 2 miles to the bus stop everyday to go "somewhere?"
I dont think this young man is harmful but I wonder
what harm could come to him...
exactly! my neighbors just let him roam around outside with no supervision. he was caught masturbating in another neighbors house.[/B][/QUOTE] On the flip side they can also be sexually abused. I don't think it is in them to rape anyone or anything like that. Their sexuality is probably very alien to them. Like they don't understand the urges. IP: Logged |
YoursTrulyAlways
Knowflake Posts: 4316
From:
Registered: Oct 2011
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posted December 15, 2012 09:49 AM
I thought you were referring to work. I was going to talk about my boss.  IP: Logged |
Desiring Shadows
Moderator Posts: 1927
From: UNITED STATES, BABY
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted December 15, 2012 10:02 AM
^lolzI always keep my cool patience-wise, because I know the differences... IP: Logged |
Lexxigramer
Moderator Posts: 861
From: The Etheric Realms...Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat...& LEXIGRAMMING.♥.. is my Passion!
Registered: Feb 2012
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posted December 15, 2012 11:32 AM
quote:
Originally posted by hippichick:
I wonder about the caretakers who let these type of "challenged" folks out into the public, alone, facing misunderstandins, etc.There is a MR boy who walks our neighborhood..he is way not right. My youngest went to school with him. But his parents send him to walk 2 miles to the bus stop everyday to go "somewhere?" I dont think this young man is harmful but I wonder what harm could come to him...
The guy who killed all those little kids and adults was mentally handicapped.
Yeah, most are not violent but I have encountered too many who were.
Then there are the ones who go about thinking they are entitled to extra special treatment, in the case of Downs Syndrome;
who even spout whilst being pushy creepy rude,cutting in lines, contaminating food buffets, grabbing and touching up to including sexually offensive,
spouting like it is a badge of honor and entitlement to not have to obey rules, laws, and respect others;
"I am SPECIAL!!!!!!!!!!!"
I am like thinking, you are retarded etc. not special in a nice way.
I know they cannot help it but it is still not something I want to be around.
Like in a clothing aisle in a store, one was feeling the cloth up like in a perverted way and wiping their nose and drooling on them.
One of my neighbors is a non Downs mentally handicapped man.
He creeps me out and frankly seems potentially dangerous.
He finds me sexy like his dead wife.
He comes onto our yard without permission and every fraking time he sees us outside.
I fear going outside because he will appear.
He peeks in our windows and yells;
"I know you're in there!!!!!!"
I have known some nice mentally handicapped folks, but to be honest,
there are some very creepy pushy potentially dangerous ones out there with no real concept of personal and societal codes of polite conduct. 
Oh yeah,
mentally handicapped people with rifles saying they are hunting deer and so forth, waving their weapon around like a toy, walking down the street......very very very scary!
IP: Logged |
Lexxigramer
Moderator Posts: 861
From: The Etheric Realms...Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat...& LEXIGRAMMING.♥.. is my Passion!
Registered: Feb 2012
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posted December 15, 2012 11:39 AM
quote:
Originally posted by sand:
On the flip side they can also be sexually abused. I don't think it is in them to rape anyone or anything like that. Their sexuality is probably very alien to them. Like they don't understand the urges.
Yes some are sexually abused. 
However;
most I know of are very very aware of their sexual urges and do have lovers.
Some do public displays of affection that border on whoa get a room for that!
Others try to impose on folks, even children
and yes, masturbate and flash in public.IP: Logged |
Ceridwen
Knowflake Posts: 5011
From:
Registered: Jul 2011
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posted December 15, 2012 11:55 AM
Oh MY GOD,I am so ******* angry right now that I can`t even find words to describe. And quite frankly, it doesn`t even seem worth the effort.
Just one thing no person with Down syndrome thinks they are entitled to a special treatment or acting like king of the castle, UNLESS they were brought up that way!
It has NOTHING to do with Down syndrome AT ALL, like it is a sign of their mental handicap. Xiro, thank you for your post.  IP: Logged |
Ceridwen
Knowflake Posts: 5011
From:
Registered: Jul 2011
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posted December 15, 2012 11:59 AM
Great examples here for a spiritual community. 
IP: Logged |
hippichick
Moderator Posts: 2078
From:
Registered: May 2009
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posted December 15, 2012 12:24 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Ceridwen:
I donīt know about heartless or callous, I just see narrowminded and intolerant here.Not just you though.
Great examples here for a spiritual community.
I shall clarify my post.
I am asking the caregivers to own their responsibility and their jobs to keep them from harm and out of potential hazard's way. These folks are not able to fully care for themselves and live entirely independent so where in the heck are the people who are responsible for the challenged ones?
IP: Logged |
Ceridwen
Knowflake Posts: 5011
From:
Registered: Jul 2011
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posted December 15, 2012 12:49 PM
quote:
Originally posted by hippichick:
These folks are not able to fully care for themselves and live entirely independent so where in the heck are the people who are responsible for the challenged ones?
I completely concur with this.
I was mostly referring to Lexigrammer`s and somethingexcellent posts.
As for aquaguy, well not really a sign of the most open person around int his post, but he was quite honest about feeling awkward. It`s just how he feels.
And yes, sometimes they are posing a challenge to stay patient. lol
However having said that two days ago two women who were clearly not mentally handicapped posed a lot more challenge to my patience than someone with mental handicap ever did.
My brother has the Downsyndrome, and I know quite a lot people with Downsyndrome and other mental handicaps. And I have worked with some autists and people with ASpergers. And if I have learned one thing then that they are as varied and individual as people without mental handicap (though I find that us so called normal people often have more of an emotional handicap). It very much depends on how they were educated and what experiences they made with their environment in a young age. Of course there are some that are behaving like King of the Castle, but usually they do so cause they have always been treated like they were Kings by their family.
What is a common sign of the Down syndrome is that they do not really have a feeling for "distance" and of course not for socially acceptable behaviour, unless they are being taught this explicitly, and with more emphasis than most other people.
Usually they are reacting quite immediately to external or internal stimuli, very emotionally. Since they are mentally handicapped they are often on the stage of a kid, even if they are grown ups. Now, we are living in a society that is functioning of the basis of social rules of bheavour, which of course entails a lot of distance (sometimes i feel too much of it actually - people are so distanced from each other that some can be dead for months without their neighbours noticing in some cases=).
Now this distance-less-ness of people with Down syndrome can of course lead to masturbating in public. Well, if they feel like it, they might do.
However, most people with Down syndrome would never do that, cause they learned and have been taught that it is not acceptable to behave that way.
Actually my brother learned the rules so well, that he has lost a lot of his instinctive connection to his emotions, which he is slowly learning again.
He is ust so afraid that anything he does of his own accord would lead to rejection or is not acceptable.
He is a Capricorn, too.
I feel that his education was going some steps too far in this.
But education is necessary. It is necessary for all of us, so for people with mental handicaps as well. And a lot depends on how much effort their environment put into bringing them up.
BTW people with Down syndrome were considered sacred and divine in several ancient cultures like Incas and Aztecs.
I guess this was culturally necessary to ensure that thy were being taken care of, as they could not survive on their own.
But that taking care of each other is actually a foundation of culture, of society, even though it has been quite perverted in the mean time. And there is a lot to learn from people with Down syndrome (can`t really speak for the other handicaps) in this regard. I love going to celebrations with my brother. You know why?
Cause I have never felt more love in any other getting together.
Their caretakers, often the parents, with that sacrifical love and unwavering protectiveness (cause let`s face it, if they took up the responsibility, they had to give up a lot of what many people consider valuable in life); and the people with Down syndrome themselves. To be honest my brother has always been a mission and a gift to my family. And I am absolutely convinced, it was him who taught me and my family the most valuable lesson of all. To value and embrace life in all its shades.  IP: Logged |
Lexxigramer
Moderator Posts: 861
From: The Etheric Realms...Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat...& LEXIGRAMMING.♥.. is my Passion!
Registered: Feb 2012
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posted December 15, 2012 04:25 PM
Ceridwen
I WAS NOT ATTACKING FOLKS WITH DOWNS SYNDROME!
YOU STATED QUITE CLEARLY WHAT I TRIED (and failed) TO CONVEY:
quote:
It very much depends on how they were educated and what experiences they made with their environment in a young age.Of course there are some that are behaving like King of the Castle, but usually they do so cause they have always been treated like they were Kings by their family.
I was referring to the ones I have encountered who ARE NOT BEING TRAINED OR TAKEN CARE OF PROPERLY!!!!!!!!!
I know there are some who are being cared for properly, but it seems that in my area with all its poverty,
the afflicted are left usually to do their own thing and or are being given the impression they are entitled to be treated better than others and are arrogant and rude.
Glad your brother has the love and support and training that the ones I have encountered have not.
I was only stating what I have personally seen going on.
Sorry but that is how it is too often.
You paint me out like some hater when I am not. quote:
Originally posted by hippichick:
I shall clarify my post.I am asking the caregivers to own their responsibility and their jobs to keep them from harm and out of potential hazard's way. These folks are not able to fully care for themselves and live entirely independent so where in the heck are the people who are responsible for the challenged ones?
EXACTLY!
I was referring to that group not ones like your brother Ceridwen!
It is a sad fact that they do exist whether you want to acknowledge that fact or not and paint me as a hater.
Because of my childhood speech impediment and other physical troubles;
I was mistakenly put in what was known sadly in my day as the retard class for a few years.
I made some wonderful friends of the mentally handicapped kids  and took it upon myself to be their protector even once it was discovered that I was not retarded and in fact had the highest IQ in like a 100 mile radius.
(180 well above the genius level of 135).
In my day, some 40/50 years ago kids were always being mislabeled.
If you were different, you were automatically labeled retarded even when not.
I treasure those friendships I made whilst in the handicapped class. ;
and even though it has been years since then, and sadly many have died;
they were wonderful folks.
So do not judge me because of what I have observed. The kids in the "retarded class" I was in, were polite and did not act like many do now with the you are special=better attitude they are being taught.
We camped out and did all kinds of things together when rejected by the "perfect kids" and their snobbery.
We worked for farmers in the Summer doing hard labor the "perfect kids" were just too high and mighty to do.
Good memories there to say the least.
Being mislabeled as retarded personally myself;
I know damn well first hand about such folks.
Even regular kids get the wrong message when they are told they are special.
Special? Everyone is special but that does not mean better than others.
Kids whether handicapped or not get the wrong message when told that.
Several of my best friends, long dead,
were mentally handicapped.
Geeez....just being honest and stating things how they are in some cases and I get stamped with the heartless hater label.  IP: Logged |
Linda Jones
Knowflake Posts: 1509
From:
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted December 15, 2012 09:55 PM
It is my belief that people with Down's and other such syndromes/handicaps have incarnated in this 3D world so that others around them (without these challenges) can learn lessons in love and caring, including patience.And anyone who spurs our soul growth deserves thanks because they in fact serve as a beacon of light. And if we can recognize it, they are actually our Guides.
@ Ceri:
Thank you for sharing the story of your brother. I can see where a lot of your high mindedness comes from. I seem to remember from somewhere that you said your brother has asteroid Angel exactly conjunct asteroid DNA in his natal. I'm sure he serves as an Angel Guide for you and your family. That's astrology at work once again, proving something in real life.
quote:
... two days ago two women who were clearly not mentally handicapped posed a lot more challenge to my patience than someone with mental handicap ever did.
I so agree with this scenario as this has happened to me. I've worked with people with Down's and other disabilities as a volunteer and found the regular folks there trying my patience much more.
quote:
... people with Down syndrome were considered sacred and divine in several ancient cultures like Incas and Aztecs.
I'm not surprised about this because this is how it should be.
@ Aquaguy:
Here's a quote for you LOL Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you, but not in the one ahead.
~ Bill Mcglashen
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------------------
I have a DO NOT DISTURB sign on my imagination ... because I want to frustrate the twins ... Convention and Dogma The moment I cease to seek the truth, or settle for the truth in the moment ... that is the moment I cease to be a seeker, and become a fundamentalist instead. ~ me, myself, and I ~ IP: Logged |
Lexxigramer
Moderator Posts: 861
From: The Etheric Realms...Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat...& LEXIGRAMMING.♥.. is my Passion!
Registered: Feb 2012
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posted December 16, 2012 03:58 AM
It seems this thread is glitching or someone is messing with my posts.Re-Posting my post made about 3 hours before the one by Linda Jones... Lexxigramer
Moderator Posts: 844
From: The Etheric Realms...Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat...& LEXIGRAMMING.Black heart (cards).. is my Passion!
Registered: Feb 2012
posted December 15, 2012 06:56 PM Ceridwen 
Please see all my replies above:
Sorry I p!ssed you off.
I do not think you read all my posts carefully.
I posted about a stalker type mentally handicapped person also. (schizoid and ?)
I am physically disabled and afraid to be in my own yard alone because of that creepy man.
When my husband is not home that man bangs on my door and yells;
"I know you're in there!".
Another guy a few houses down from us told me he is a schizophrenic but said that he has had lots of shock therapy and wanted to be buddies because he is OK now and has no friends left because he freaked them all out.
My having been assaulted/hurt/nearly killed by mentally handicapped people;
including repeated death threats;(schizoid)
up to including one(Downs)cornering me in a basement laundry room to "show me his knives" up very close like in my face......
including him being verbally sexually aggressive obscene other times.....
well;
I am quite leery of "some" mentally handicapped people now.
His twin brother was basically OK however even though he was "too friendly" and tried to touch inappropriately and played peeping Tom.
I have tried to clarify my povs,
based on my personal experiences;
which are not your personal experiences;
as you seem to see me as a hater.
I am quite aware that not all mentally handicapped people are not creepy or potentially dangerous.
Many are nice.
But like it or not, some are scary and or not nice.
Like the one aquaguy91 mentioned after quoting this from hippichick:
quote:
Originally posted by hippichick:
I wonder about the caretakers who let these type of "challenged" folks out into the public, alone, facing misunderstandins, etc. There is a MR boy who walks our neighborhood..he is way not right. My youngest went to school with him. But his parents send him to walk 2 miles to the bus stop everyday to go "somewhere?"
I dont think this young man is harmful but I wonder
what harm could come to him...
quote:
Originally posted by aquaguy91:
exactly! my neighbors just let him roam around outside with no supervision. he was caught masturbating in another neighbors house.
aquaguy91 said the man was caught masturbating IN ANOTHER NEIGHBORS HOUSE.
Would you feel good about him coming into your home and doing that?
What if he wandered into a room with a little kid in it?
Your child?
I am disabled and at times am bed bound.
I would not want some mentally handicapped person wandering into my home, especially when I am defenseless.
BTW,
I was molested as a child by a man who most likely had Downs. (he was a hired farmhand)
Not sure he had DS but he had the physical features (mongoloid I think it is called?)and folks said he was retarded. He was friendly but way too touchy feely in a bad way towards little kids.
We trusted him because he was like a big kid and fun.
(he was like 40 years old or so)
But he went to far with some of us neighbor kids.
Anyhow please do not think me a hater of mentally handicapped folks.
Whilst many of my personal experiences have been positive;
some of my personal experiences have been rather negative.Hopefully this post does not vanish again.
IP: Logged |
Lexxigramer
Moderator Posts: 861
From: The Etheric Realms...Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat...& LEXIGRAMMING.♥.. is my Passion!
Registered: Feb 2012
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posted December 16, 2012 04:26 AM
I see yet another post of mine has vanished.
IP: Logged |
Lexxigramer
Moderator Posts: 861
From: The Etheric Realms...Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat...& LEXIGRAMMING.♥.. is my Passion!
Registered: Feb 2012
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posted December 16, 2012 05:31 AM
closing this thread because a bunch more posts have vanished. IP: Logged |
Ceridwen
Knowflake Posts: 5011
From:
Registered: Jul 2011
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posted December 16, 2012 05:59 AM
Lexx,my last post to you has vanished as well.
I just wanted to thank you for clarifying.
Your first post came across so generalistic to me, and I find generalizations to be dangerous.
No people are the same, not even mentally handicapped ones.
In no way I meant to downplay your nasty experiences.
It is unexcusable, no matter if people are mentally handicapped or not. Period. But I think that we as a social community (humanity) have the responsibility to CARE for and GUIDE those, who canīt do it on their own, from a young age on. Not only the parents, but everyone.
People with mental handicap can be educated as to what is appropriate and what not, and that is OUR responsibility as community. However, I understand that I am pretty much on my own with that thought. It cost patience and time and involvement of course. And that doesn`t really fit into our selforiented society.
But pushing them out and making them live a "parallel life" doesn`t solve anything. They need to be treated as part of the society. Of course they have special needs that have to be addressed (needing someone to guide their everyday life for example), but I agree with you, being "special" does mean neither better nor worse than others.
And actually I think everyone of us is special and different, and has a right to be treated with respect.
IP: Logged |
Lexxigramer
Moderator Posts: 861
From: The Etheric Realms...Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat...& LEXIGRAMMING.♥.. is my Passion!
Registered: Feb 2012
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posted December 16, 2012 06:07 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Ceridwen:
Lexx,my last post to you has vanished as well.
I just wanted to thank you for clarifying.
Your first post came across so generalistic to me, and I find generalizations to be dangerous.
No people are the same, not even mentally handicapped ones.
In no way I meant to downplay your nasty experiences.
It is unexcusable, no matter if people are mentally handicapped or not. Period. But I think that we as a social community (humanity) have the responsibility to CARE for and GUIDE those, who canīt do it on their own, from a young age on. Not only the parents, but everyone.
People with mental handicap can be educated as to what is appropriate and what not, and that is OUR responsibility as community. However, I understand that I am pretty much on my own with that thought. It cost patience and time and involvement of course. And that doesn`t really fit into our selforiented society.
But pushing them out and making them live a "parallel life" doesn`t solve anything. They need to be treated as part of the society. Of course they have special needs that have to be addressed (needing someone to guide their everyday life for example), but I agree with you, being "special" does mean neither better nor worse than others.
And actually I think everyone of us is special and different, and has a right to be treated with respect.
I closed this thread but it mysteriously re-opened.:alien:
Thank you for replying again.
I must rest now....
this glitching thread and trying to re-post for a few hows this morning is just too much for me.
I will leave it open for the moment as closing it did not help fix things either.:(IP: Logged |
juniperb
Moderator Posts: 5623
From: Blue Star Kachina
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 16, 2012 09:43 AM
At first read , I thought aquaguy cold .
Another read and I realized he should be commended for daring to ask and question openly an issue that affects his mind and emotions in different ways. Folks are not often in a position of meeting autistic people and having ambivalent emotions about them. I`d much rather, as a sister with a mentally retarded brother, have others be honest than dismissive, blaming involved caretakers for trying to give the autistic as normal a life as possable . How would this be "special treatment" or a danger to the neighborhood is beyond me.I see it as a misunderstanding and perhaps some fear involved. Ceri and Xiiro. You explained with words that fail me now. ------------------
We need to listen to our own song, and share it with others, but not force it on them. Our songs are different. They should be in harmony with each other. ~ Mattie Stepanek IP: Logged |
Lexxigramer
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From: The Etheric Realms...Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat...& LEXIGRAMMING.♥.. is my Passion!
Registered: Feb 2012
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posted December 16, 2012 11:25 AM
quote:
Originally posted by juniperb:
At first read , I thought aquaguy cold .
Another read and I realized he should be commended for daring to ask and question openly an issue that affects his mind and emotions in different ways. Folks are not often in a position of meeting autistic people and having ambivalent emotions about them. I`d much rather, as a sister with a mentally retarded brother, have others be honest than dismissive, blaming involved caretakers for trying to give the autistic as normal a life as possable . How would this be "special treatment" or a danger to the neighborhood is beyond me.I see it as a misunderstanding and perhaps some fear involved. Ceri and Xiiro. You explained with words that fail me now.
Taking care of someone and all is not special treatment.
It is what is needed just as surely as I need help with many things a non disabled person does not.
I was referring to folks who need watched out for and help relating to the world.
Too many are left to their own devices.
Would you let a child run freely without rules or supervision in some things?
These folks are often "childlike" in their outlooks and maturity;
and like a young child do need to be watched and helped. PS.
I have several Autistic people in my life.
Some very close relatives, some folks I have known as eccentric hermit like reclusive friends for decades.
There are varying degrees of it from severe;
and unable to function in the world around them;
to able to fit in to the point most folks would not even realize they are Autistic.
One of the greatest loves of my life to date is an Autistic man.
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