posted January 18, 2013 07:27 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by somethingexcellent:
"Thanks, now tell me more about how I should run my life."

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posted January 18, 2013 07:30 PM            

"You could do better"
"Oh, thanks!"
"So do better"
"No, thanks"

posted January 18, 2013 07:34 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by aquaguy91:
its stupid... girls say that to other girls all the time.

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Of course, because girls are stupid.....

posted January 18, 2013 07:40 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:

Of course, because girls are stupid.....

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posted January 18, 2013 09:29 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by aquaguy91:
i'm just being honest when i say i have never heard a guy say that ... however im sure some have said it...

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posted January 18, 2013 09:32 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Lexxigramer:
[QUOTE]Originally posted by aquaguy91:
[b]i'm just being honest when i say i have never heard a guy say that ... however im sure some have said it...

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[/B][/QUOTE]

And if they have not said it, we have thought it at least once!

Seriously though, what I've found is the less one cares what anyone else thinks, the happier one will be.

posted January 18, 2013 09:59 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by sand:
I hate women that rely on their friends' opinions. Such.. Pussies. (Don't mean the op coz we do not know each other) strong and independent with a mind of her own for me.

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posted January 18, 2013 10:03 PM            

I can handle my mum though. She's a Leo so she has a superiority complex. I'm just like: "whatever trevor".

The only guy she did not say this about was *also* a Leo LOL And she is still going on about how I should've married him.

However - what really gets me is when a group of people all decide to tell me that he is not good enough.
I have had this happen recently..
Literally every second person in my life is having a go at this guy, trying to put him down in my eyes.
Not to mention - he has also said this about -himself-. He told me he thought he wasn't good enough for me.
If anything bothers me more than other people saying this... it's the person saying it themselves.

When this has happened - & I asked people what they meant by it - the main reasons were:

- financial.. the guy in question is not *as* wealthy as my 'friend/s' think he should be in order to be 'good enough'..

- education-related... the guy has attained a lower level of education than mine.

- appearance-related... the guy is not considered as physically attractive.

- moral/social.... the guy's actions might be considered anti-social or amoral (like sleeping around for example)

- behavioural.... the guy's behaviour towards me is considered 'less' than what I deserve... e.g. he gets me a $100 present for valentines & my friends think i should be with someone who gets me a house, a car and a yacht for valentines.. or something along those lines lol

I ignore this kind of thing now. I'm very clear about my standards.. and what I want in a man.
The only reason I would break up with someone or not date him in the first place - would be if he is not what *I* personally want and expect.
It has nothing to do with whatever anyone else thinks of him.
You have to know who you are and what you want. This is a personal decision. It is your life and it's definitely not someone else's call.

Sometimes these people realise how wrong they were - as time goes on. For instance my step sis has been in a long-term de facto rel. for over 10 yrs. Everyone said they would break up and that it wouldn't work out (because he wasn't 'good' enough), but it's still working out.

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quote:

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I have heard quite a few guys say it.
Actually hmmmm, I have never heard a female say it.

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posted January 18, 2013 10:33 PM            

A. They are thought if as slutty. (Actually inexperienced so listening to friends #meh)

B. They are "players".

posted January 18, 2013 10:41 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Odette:
It bothers me when people say this.
My mum has a habit of saying it *all* the time about absolutely everyone.

I can handle my mum though. She's a Leo so she has a superiority complex. I'm just like: "whatever trevor".

The only guy she did not say this about was *also* a Leo LOL And she is still going on about how I should've married him.

However - what really gets me is when a group of people all decide to tell me that he is not good enough.
I have had this happen recently..
Literally every second person in my life is having a go at this guy, trying to put him down in my eyes.
Not to mention - he has also said this about -himself-. He told me he thought he wasn't good enough for me.
If anything bothers me more than other people saying this... it's the person saying it themselves.

When this has happened - & I asked people what they meant by it - the main reasons were:

- financial.. the guy in question is not *as* wealthy as my 'friend/s' think he should be in order to be 'good enough'..

- education-related... the guy has attained a lower level of education than mine.

- appearance-related... the guy is not considered as physically attractive.

- moral/social.... the guy's actions might be considered anti-social or amoral (like sleeping around for example)

- behavioural.... the guy's behaviour towards me is considered 'less' than what I deserve... e.g. he gets me a $100 present for valentines & my friends think i should be with someone who gets me a house, a car and a yacht for valentines.. or something along those lines lol

I ignore this kind of thing now. I'm very clear about my standards.. and what I want in a man.
The only reason I would break up with someone or not date him in the first place - would be if he is not what *I* personally want and expect.
It has nothing to do with whatever anyone else thinks of him.
You have to know who you are and what you want. This is a personal decision. It is your life and it's definitely not someone else's call.

Sometimes these people realise how wrong they were - as time goes on. For instance my step sis has been in a long-term de facto rel. for over 10 yrs. Everyone said they would break up and that it wouldn't work out (because he wasn't 'good' enough), but it's still working out.

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I usually get this from women, but I've had the occasional male friend say similar things as well.

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Right on, love that in a person, male or female.

I do think a network of friends is a valuable thing, I also think they go to far when it comes to someone else's personal decisions.

posted January 19, 2013 02:35 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Odette:
moral/social.... the guy's actions might be considered anti-social or amoral (like sleeping around for example)

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I'd be inclined to agree with the said person then, unless you really don't mind it, in which case whatever floats your boat. (I'm not meaning to include polaymory, open relationships, etc, but someone who lies & betrays.) That is to say if a friend of mine were to complain of it, or I found out about it, I'd say the same. 'Course if she said drop it then I would...as long as she didn't whine about being cheated on.

I'd also get on her case if she were to cheat on him, unless he was a chronic cheater himself in which case I'd hope she found someone better while cheating on the cheater.

quote:

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Originally posted by Odette:
behavioural.... the guy's behaviour towards me is considered 'less' than what I deserve... e.g. he gets me a $100 present for valentines & my friends think i should be with someone who gets me a house, a car and a yacht for valentines.. or something along those lines lol

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You're definitely in a different income bracket than me, practically a different world. And if some guy got me a $100 present for Valentine's then I very well might question his common sense and count it against him unless that was pure pocket change to him and/or there was a compelling reason for it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4kGvlESGvbs

posted January 19, 2013 02:45 AM            

That said, I'm not a slave to my friend's opinions. I learned a bitter lesson about going against my own judgment to please friends while in my teens and I won't do it again. I ultimately make up my own mind about these things and expect the same respect (or at least tolerance) for my choices even when it wouldn't be their choice that I show them for their choices that would not be my choice. I'm not so spineless as to do as I'm told, but then I'm not too proud to consider the insights and opinions of others either.

posted January 19, 2013 03:10 AM            

I would say "Lets see you handle the situation, I doubt you know how much B*llshit I have to put up with".

Its easy to judge someone, but we are all individuals all dealing with are own unique problems.

posted January 19, 2013 06:24 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by hannaramaa:
I get where you're coming from Faith! Although I do think girls probably say this to each other more than guys do. However, that's not to say guys don't somehow influence their friends' decision to stay with a girl in the beginning or not.

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I hope it was clear that I was laughing because aquaguy said, "Girls always say stupid stuff like this," which struck me as more anti-girl talk from him. Yeah, we always just say stupid stuff.

*rolls eyes*

Fact is, I agree with Lexx: I've only heard "you can do better from" from guys, and I've heard my girl friends complaining that guys say this to them. It's condescending.

posted January 19, 2013 12:39 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
I hope it was clear that I was laughing because aquaguy said, "Girls always say stupid stuff like this," which struck me as more anti-girl talk from him. Yeah, we always just say stupid stuff.

*rolls eyes*

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posted January 19, 2013 06:19 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by YoursTrulyAlways:
Do better in what sense? That you should have someone that looks like Clooney or Cruise or Pitt. Or better meaning there are lots of eligible doctors out there? How about Prince Harry? Or better meaning he rides a Harley, writes poetry, cooks gourmet meals and hates looking at all other women? What is the definition of "better?"

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My point exactly.