posted June 12, 2013 02:08 PM            

Something I have always wondered...

quote:

---

However, you are inclined to keep your feelings to yourself, even when you ought to discuss them with someone. It isn't good to bottle up your angry feelings.
Women will be very important in changing your life and you may "inherit" something from a woman.

---

It is true I keep my anger bottled up, especially when it comes to "hidden anger".
I dont hold in little things like people not picking up their things, but things that really bother me, deep down..

What I really mean is..
My mother was an alcoholic. It is what killed her coming up on 5 years ago.
I didnt cry. Of course I was surprised in finding out, its not something you wake up expecting to hear that day, but I always knew it could be any time.
I hadnt talked to her in a month due to her drinking, so the news kind of bothered me.
It was a very long time before I really cried over her death. Sure I let out a little weep here and there, but actually taking the time and emotion to mourn her took me over a coulple years to do.

During this time I went through a horrible and dark time in my life. For awhile I couldnt figure out what was wrong with me.. but I was harboring those feelings of anger towards my mom and it was making mentally and physically sick.

That is really just a short version, but from it all I think I have learned that you cant go through life holding everything in. You need to learn to cry or even laugh. I need to love and be more patient, even if I am at my wits end. And I need to learn to accept.

posted June 12, 2013 02:58 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by fairaqua:
I like to go back to Astro.com every now and again to read through my "Astroclick: Portrait"

Something I have always wondered...

It is true I keep my anger bottled up, especially when it comes to "hidden anger".
I dont hold in little things like people not picking up their things, but things that really bother me, deep down..

What I really mean is..
My mother was an alcoholic. It is what killed her coming up on 5 years ago.
I didnt cry. Of course I was surprised in finding out, its not something you wake up expecting to hear that day, but I always knew it could be any time.
I hadnt talked to her in a month due to her drinking, so the news kind of bothered me.
It was a very long time before I really cried over her death. Sure I let out a little weep here and there, but actually taking the time and emotion to mourn her took me over a coulple years to do.

During this time I went through a horrible and dark time in my life. For awhile I couldnt figure out what was wrong with me.. but I was harboring those feelings of anger towards my mom and it was making mentally and physically sick.

That is really just a short version, but from it all I think I have learned that you cant go through life holding everything in. You need to learn to cry or even laugh. I need to love and be more patient, even if I am at my wits end. And I need to learn to accept.

Ive always kind of wondered if that is what it ment by "Women will be very important in changing your life and you may "inherit" something from a woman."

---

Aww This may get moved but may not as it is a SW peas topic, too. I can relate so much, Friend

------------------
Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal