posted July 01, 2013 09:19 AM            

I know what a crappy relationship with parents is. Stay strong And do whatever it takes to feel better, even if that means cutting them out of your life.

posted July 01, 2013 09:31 AM            

For example, I was having a really rough time a while back for a number of reasons, and it came out in expressions of anger whilst I was playing sport. I stopped, and took some time to work out why I was angry, and what I could or could not do to resolve the root issue.

I don't really know you, or your life situation, but do you maybe feel that sometimes you sublimate how you feel just to make things easier? So say for example, a friend asked you to spend some time with her, but you had already planned to have a you day and do xyz. Do you do something like, well she's my friend it would be bad of me not to spend time with her, event hough I really wanted today to myself. If you are doing something similar to this, you need to stop brushing off looking after yourself first and foremost.

Why can't you tell people you resent your feelings? They are obviously there for a good reason, everyone has feelings, and they are important for all of us.

Really the only way to really find out what the cause is, would be to have an long series of in depth conversations, with either yourself, or someone you feel comfortable talking with. You don't even need to talk about specific things, it could be as simple as talking about things in general. It is very hard to find someone to talk to, who will genuinely listen.

I wish you the best.

posted July 01, 2013 09:31 AM            

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted July 01, 2013 10:00 AM            

If you don't or there's just no way you can open up...then I think it would be best to isolate yourself completely, at least as long your anger lasts.

posted July 01, 2013 10:25 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Doux Rêve:
I don't think getting physical about it will help.. if anything, it may help relieve the temporary tension, but the underlying feelings will remain.

So it's like treating the symptom and not the cause, you know?

The problem lies in my feeling unheard, I think.

Unheard by the people who hurt me.
They don't know what they did, or if they do, they don't realise just how much it affected me.

I'm talking about my parents, here.

And I can't tell them about my angry / hurt feelings.. I just can't.

I don't know what to do about it.

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Je suis desolee ma cherie...Tout commence avec nos parents,n'est ce pas? Je ne pense pas qu'ils vont accepter leur faute meme si tu leur en parle.

posted July 01, 2013 11:15 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Doux Rêve:
I don't think getting physical about it will help.. if anything, it may help relieve the temporary tension, but the underlying feelings will remain.

So it's like treating the symptom and not the cause, you know?

The problem lies in my feeling unheard, I think.

Unheard by the people who hurt me.
They don't know what they did, or if they do, they don't realise just how much it affected me.

I'm talking about my parents, here.

And I can't tell them about my angry / hurt feelings.. I just can't.

I don't know what to do about it.

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I am just going back and studying this thread. Some people will never hear. I am going through kind of the same thing.

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted July 01, 2013 03:18 PM            

The way shamanic practitioners address soul fragmentation is by traveling back to the moment of trauma, collecting the fragment, and reuniting it with the present version of the soul. If you want to do this yourself, it is important to keep a few things in mind.

1. Your fragment is a fully functional version of you. If you didn't trust adults, you may not want to approach it as an adult. If you had fear of aggressive people, you may need to approach it with gentleness.

2. It is not rare for a fragment to hide from you. A practitioner is well aware of how to manipulate the "dream world" (aka imagination) to coax a hiding or terrified fragment. I have a panther totem with a very strong "soft kitty/mama" vibe. I often use her when a fragment is particularly afraid.

3. Sometimes you may have to resolve the trauma before the fragment will go with you. An unprotected and vulnerable fragment being accosted by a parent, may need a hero to put that out-of-control authority figure in its place. Keep in mind though that your fragment may resist your help if you battle aggression with aggression. You were smart when the trauma happened and that means you wouldn't go with a stranger who deals with problems the same way your perpetrators did.

4. You often need to explain to your fragment why you are there and why they should come with you. You can't just snatch up a soul and whisk it off. The fragment has to willingly come with you. It can be helpful to explain that you are taking your fragment back to a safe place where you have grown up and learned how to protect your self from similar situations. Explain that where you are taking the fragment is home and that they are so wanted because without them, your home feels as if something is missing.

5. Trust your vision. It may feel uncomfortable or weird and when you get to the trauma it may be very different from how you remember it. Sometimes you journey and you don't see anything, but your feelings direct you. This isn't uncommon when the fragment decides it is safest to find a dark place and hide. You are traveling through your own mind/imagination to the place where you feel emotionally stuck, respecting that your experience is more complex than just a memory, and letting it go. The more you surrender to the journey, the more effective it will be. The more creative you are, the more command you will have over the dream world environment.

6. Bring tools. Shamanism is a healing modality of the mind, so objects of sentiment can be strong tools. If you lack a totem animal, but have a teddy bear, bring him. When you need a protector, teddy can be gnarly in the dream world. Also bring a container as a symbolic vehicle for transportation. When you gain the consent of your fragment, you will want to put them in a container. This assures them safety and helps you not have to keep track of the soul as you journey back. When you return to the present, you can open the physical container and inhale or drink the soul back into your body.

This used to be part of my healing practice and the results were phenomenal. =)

posted July 01, 2013 03:25 PM            

I am a person who also has a LOT of pent up anger (mostly at myself) and I am still trying to find the 'perfect' way to release this anger other than blowing up into tears and getting into fights (verbal, physical) every once in a while. I really hate it that when my anger reaches its boiling point, my tears are uncontrollable, no matter how hard I try to push them back to its respective lacrimal glands

So far, the most effective method for me right now is praying. When I light a candle at church, I tell God all my thoughts, feelings, everything. Afterwards, I just bask in the heat of the candle/s that surround me. It feels very refreshing. And to tell you the truth, I am not what you can call a religious person but God's love helps me release some, if not all of the anger inside me.

posted July 01, 2013 07:01 PM            

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted July 01, 2013 08:12 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Doux Rêve:

Like I want to express myself so bad but something's blocking me.

Any advice?

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posted July 01, 2013 10:17 PM            

quote:

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Doux Rêve: anyone who tries to "help" me by telling me to just "relax, breathe and let go" makes me want to punch a wall.

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That's actually really stupid advice, so it's good you're not listening to it! Relax, breathe, and let go? What does that even mean! Sounds like repression to me.

Entertain your negative thoughts! If you're imagining doing something out of spite and anger, then imagine it. Plan it. Eventually you'll run out of anger and you'll be done. It's like fuel. Personally, I imagine my feelings as little gingerbread people and I eat them. If I'm hateful towards someone, I'll let myself feel hateful. I'll resent them, rant about them to my friend, whatever I feel like doing; but you can't stay one feeling forever if you express it. Eventually I stop because I'm too tired to continue - my anger is spent, and all is right with the world again.

Now my Scorpio homegirl, I leave you a very Scorpio quote:

quote:

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6. Don’t fight your demons. Your demons are here to teach you lessons. Sit down with your demons and have a drink and a chat and learn their names and talk about the burns on their fingers and scratches on their ankles. Some of them are very nice.

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