posted July 20, 2013 08:49 PM            

I never really realized how afraid I was of it until I kind of moved away from my old self, a bit.

I kind of let something go inside me, some part of my ego, I guess. Then, I saw how afraid I am to let anyone know me.

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted July 20, 2013 09:03 PM            

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted July 21, 2013 12:48 AM            

(music) The Who - Who are You? (FuLL/Lyrics) [6:17] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r5kmCgVhADY

posted July 21, 2013 06:52 AM            

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted July 21, 2013 03:03 PM            

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted July 21, 2013 05:11 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Padre35:

Well, for me, things are just different for men. Basically we are trained from a young age simply not to delve into such things.

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Yes, to me, it is harder to be a man than a woman but that is just how I feel and people may/ will disagree.

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted July 21, 2013 05:12 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by mirage29:
^ And as a girl/female I was 'ridiculed' if show emotion... stuffing it was 'more comfortable' for 'them' and not me

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Yep, but it is not healthy to have a life as a programmed robot. That is what I am seeing--Grrrrr

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted July 22, 2013 10:46 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by mirage29:
^ And as a girl/female I was 'ridiculed' if show emotion... stuffing it was 'more comfortable' for 'them' and not me

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Well, sort of, in my experience what will happen is those emotions will leak out one way or another.

With men it leads to very self destructive behaviors, with women they sort of come out of left field.

posted July 23, 2013 08:43 AM            

When you play music and sing, you have to be real. It will be totally boring if you can't feel someone's heart.

Think of musicians who are not that good but have an open heart and you think they are great like Willie Nelson.

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted July 24, 2013 03:37 AM            

Has to be that magic-connect through the eyes, or with the ether-jello in the air... like connective raw eggwhite, or clear jello. It's substance.

Feel the audience or room-air like the hair edges of a cat's ears and whiskers... Even the people in the back row will feel the touch!

And for me, I'm a people-hugger and toucher. I realize how uncomfortable many people are about that.... But I've been told I'm a really good hugger. I love people from the core of me... and want them to heal. Love to embrace children...

posted August 17, 2013 01:56 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by mirage29:
Relating to what you're saying with music and performing, Ami... Onstage or off, it's about relationship and forming an intimacy.

Has to be that magic-connect through the eyes, or with the ether-jello in the air... like connective raw eggwhite, or clear jello. It's substance.

Feel the audience or room-air like the hair edges of a cat's ears and whiskers... Even the people in the back row will feel the touch!

And for me, I'm a people-hugger and toucher. I realize how uncomfortable many people are about that.... But I've been told I'm a really good hugger. I love people from the core of me... and want them to heal. Love to embrace children...

To your comment about "giving" your emotions...?
Sometimes it's good to just allow them to flow by themselves....unforced. 'You can't give what you don't have'....

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<3 i loved this post so much!!
"we accept the love we think we deserve"

Ami i feel your pain, I am a combination of you and mirage29. I am terrified of opening myself up emotionally but i am a total people-hugger and affectionate person. People get confused because I'm open to 95% of people in that way, except for when my romantic emotions are involved and then i shy away from all the real people that i actually want to open up to...it's terribly contradictory and i imagine it's horribly confusing to the people i'm romantically interested in.

posted August 20, 2013 08:34 AM            

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted August 21, 2013 03:47 AM            

I can relate to what you said. So weird, isn't it? Accepting real interest, and real love.... We need to soak in a bit more? On the romantic issue, yes, I can almost feel the sting... O my!

{{{Beautiful HUGS}}} to you!!!

posted August 21, 2013 08:27 AM            

My current partner has the tendency to be self reliant and continuously independent. I have the tendency to want to be close all the time. We were fighting a lot for the last few months because of the anxiety I felt when I got too close to him and became fearful.

posted August 21, 2013 01:26 PM            

So Proud of you for 'taking charge of that fear' inside, and being bold to reach out and take new risks, to stretch, to 'do it afraid'... You work hard at wanting to grow and to change, and to become the Best person you know how to be. Those are admirable and noble qualities.

However, please 'don't throw out the baby with the bathwater'....? Double-Check those messages within, look again at those feelings of fear... Sometimes it's our intuition trying to relay a message to us that something's 'not right' in the situation here.

Please learn that it's very important NOT to disrespect and disregard the messages coming from our inner selves. Be careful not to override what can perhaps possibly be a 'genuine' sense of danger or discomfort about this person or the particular situation you find yourself in.

Don't give all your power away to this dude, just to try to prove yourself 'worthy' to him.... I know you long to give out from your Beautiful Heart, and to express 'who you are' with Totality, and to merge into the Divine of Love-- through your physical, mental, emotional, spiritual joining....

This can put us into a situation where we 'project' ideal pictures of 'what we want the other to be' onto This guy (or gal). oooo can be sooooo painful and disappointing, but a lesson learned about self, and 'what we are desiring and looking for' in a partner!

MetalAphrodite? Ask the Universe to bring you this kind of an equal-Love... Give AND Take... in Safety. Yes, we are learning, and will be given contrast for ourselves to consider and learn how to discern one love from another.... (It's just that my own nurturer-goddess in me wants to tell a daughter that she's Beautiful, and to Stay Safe.... for what it's worth!)

Be Happy ..... Learn to Love Yourself Unconditionally!

(music) Ready for Love (IndiaArie) [4:29] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=moOXLgd519I

posted August 21, 2013 01:54 PM            

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted August 21, 2013 05:04 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by mirage29:
MetalAphrodite!

So Proud of you for 'taking charge of that fear' inside, and being bold to reach out and take new risks, to stretch, to 'do it afraid'... You work hard at wanting to grow and to change, and to become the Best person you know how to be. Those are admirable and noble qualities.

However, please 'don't throw out the baby with the bathwater'....? Double-Check those messages within, look again at those feelings of fear... Sometimes it's our intuition trying to relay a message to us that something's 'not right' in the situation here.

Please learn that it's very important NOT to disrespect and disregard the messages coming from our inner selves. Be careful not to override what can perhaps possibly be a 'genuine' sense of danger or discomfort about this person or the particular situation you find yourself in.

Don't give all your power away to this dude, just to try to prove yourself 'worthy' to him.... I know you long to give out from your Beautiful Heart, and to express 'who you are' with Totality, and to merge into the Divine of Love-- through your physical, mental, emotional, spiritual joining....

This can put us into a situation where we 'project' ideal pictures of 'what we want the other to be' onto This guy (or gal). oooo can be sooooo painful and disappointing, but a lesson learned about self, and 'what we are desiring and looking for' in a partner!

MetalAphrodite? Ask the Universe to bring you this kind of an equal-Love... Give AND Take... in Safety. Yes, we are learning, and will be given contrast for ourselves to consider and learn how to discern one love from another.... (It's just that my own nurturer-goddess in me wants to tell a daughter that she's Beautiful, and to Stay Safe.... for what it's worth!)

Be Happy ..... Learn to Love Yourself Unconditionally!

(music) Ready for Love (IndiaArie) [4:29] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=moOXLgd519I

(music) Because I am a Queen! (IndiaArie) [3:58] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c6MBY-0_0yU

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Surprisingly, his challenge is to learn how to trust in others and cooperate. Mine is to learn how to be more independent. We're each others' teachers.

posted August 21, 2013 07:59 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Ami Anne:
I hear you, Metal. I struggle with the same. It is fear that someone will see who we are inside that we have not accepted, I think.

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