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Author Topic:   How to be a Gentlemen
Padre35
Knowflake

Posts: 2266
From: Asheville, NC, US
Registered: Jul 2012

posted August 14, 2013 10:09 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Padre35     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jF81lr-wafo

I rather like this vid as so many guys today just do not know, or are concerned with how to be someone who was raised properly.

When I say that, I do not mean "bow a knee and supplicate", rather it is more about being an organized, competent, man.

Have to admit, if a lady is in high heels, dropping her off and picking her up close to the door is something that had not occurred to me.

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MsPrism
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Posts: 785
From:
Registered: Jun 2013

posted August 14, 2013 11:10 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for MsPrism     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Oh my gosh, I'm so glad you've posted that, if only for the one you stated previous nonadherence to.

I hate being in high heels, walking through a really slippery, just polished floor in some building foyer, getting outside, avoiding street grills, transitioning to pavement balance and then having to search for the person picking me up!

If someone starts talking on their phone or texting or looking up reddit, while they're supposed to be conversing with me. . .

*puts on the best "I'm ignoring you" face*

Ask first, seriously.

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Padre35
Knowflake

Posts: 2266
From: Asheville, NC, US
Registered: Jul 2012

posted August 14, 2013 11:21 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Padre35     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote

I've also heard brick sidewalks or streets are a sort of gauntlet for women in high heels.

Do agree w/the making sure ones lady friend makes it safely home, in fact I'd probably call to make double sure.

Blame hollyweird, just have seen to many flicks were the guy just drives off w/o making sure the psycho ex had not broken into their house.

Call it weak or whatever, cannot completely repress the Scorpinionic influence in my chart.

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MsPrism
Knowflake

Posts: 785
From:
Registered: Jun 2013

posted August 14, 2013 11:31 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for MsPrism     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
*Fearful expression*

One word:

Cobblestone

It's like staring at death and saying "BRING IT ON!"

*shakes head*

I'm glad you stay to make sure she's alright, that is very gentlemanly!

I was once with a partner that wouldn't let me stop to sit down after a LONG night of being out. He continued to say "c'mon, this is why guys are easier to go out with than girls, seriously!"

When we got home, I made him put on the heels and walk around for me.

No more complaints from him about my heels after that!

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Padre35
Knowflake

Posts: 2266
From: Asheville, NC, US
Registered: Jul 2012

posted August 14, 2013 11:38 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Padre35     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Have to admit Ms Prism, a part of me wonders:

"Can she make it across that?!?!?!"

"Oh you had to park there, did you make it across the cobblestones or did you walk around the block"?

Difficulty rating=8

Wearing hose=10, it does not get any more difficult then that...

I'm being quite silly, it just strikes me as very funny..sort of Seinfeldesque.

"I had to cancel the date, I wanted to wear those great high heels I bought on sale and that Italian place he wanted to meet me at was surrounded by cobblestone streets so there was no way I could go..."

In my town it is lose brick sidewalks, that sound great when you walk on them in dress shoes, in heels..not so much.

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aquaguy91
Knowflake

Posts: 7124
From: tennessee
Registered: Jan 2012

posted August 14, 2013 11:43 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for aquaguy91     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
That is all interesting and I will try to remember those things, especially the stuff about high heels. Although you can't blame a guy for being ignorant about what its like to wear heels because most of us don't wear heels lol.

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MsPrism
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Posts: 785
From:
Registered: Jun 2013

posted August 14, 2013 11:49 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for MsPrism     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I'm actually watching Seinfeld right now. I could definitely see it being one of their silly minor problems that ends up having huge consequences! hahaha

I've only been faced with cobblestone once. I didn't see it coming because it was a small portion of the sidewalk in front of a building, like this building specifically needed a patch of the walkway to be special!

I'm walking along, supermodel-esque (that's a lie, go with it) and my partner is walking next to me. We're chatting about the people we're going to see, what this venue will be like, etc. etc. When all of a sudden, I take another step and BAM, my eyes go wide as that first heel slips off one little infuriating rock bubble. My momentum is there so I'm forced to take another step and I do that awkward arm swing to grab onto my date, people are watching. Ugh, this doesn't suit my natural aura of confidence.

Haha I finally understood the ultimate hate of cobblestone.

So you specifically chose a place to live that puts all women that have a love affair with heels, literally on edge? *suspicious eyes* Hahaha

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Padre35
Knowflake

Posts: 2266
From: Asheville, NC, US
Registered: Jul 2012

posted August 14, 2013 11:57 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Padre35     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
It would take a man of colossal ego to ever make such a claim Ms Prism.

More like the law of the fashion jungle, the agile move forward, the non agile become "fashion roadkill"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zoCXctuVnzA

Sex in the City reference unavoidable!

Do agree with the OP about those weaker then you and hospitality industry employees, imo only the largest tool bag would not at least show some accommodation.

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MsPrism
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Posts: 785
From:
Registered: Jun 2013

posted August 15, 2013 12:25 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for MsPrism     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by aquaguy91:
That is all interesting and I will try to remember those things, especially the stuff about high heels. Although you can't blame a guy for being ignorant about what its like to wear heels because most of us don't wear heels lol.

That's true, guys don't usually wear heels but I did try to explain it to him. He was just being a bit inconsiderate. We all have our moments of weakness.

He definitely knew what I meant after walking in them for a good 5 minutes!

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Padre35
Knowflake

Posts: 2266
From: Asheville, NC, US
Registered: Jul 2012

posted August 15, 2013 12:32 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Padre35     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Don't leave us in suspense Ms Prism, how did the evening turn out?

I do think the original video teaches a lot, some perhaps runs counter to what is known as "game" or "white knighting" advice.

For myself, perhaps showing my era, it is just common sense. One of the reasons imo that young guys are so rude or inconsiderate today is they view the world as "instant payoff sexually, or friendzone, one or the other".

To me, such gentlemanliness, is a man being a man at heart w/o a secondary motive, which "game" adherents would then retort with "but you did not have sex with them!"

True, the point of it all is not sex, it is being a male in the best sense of the term.

Which is one of the areas Mr AG has not quite gotten up to speed on as of yet.

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aquaguy91
Knowflake

Posts: 7124
From: tennessee
Registered: Jan 2012

posted August 15, 2013 12:39 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for aquaguy91     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by MsPrism:
That's true, guys don't usually wear heels but I did try to explain it to him. He was just being a bit inconsiderate. We all have our moments of weakness.

He definitely knew what I meant after walking in them for a good 5 minutes!



Heels are sexy, I like tall women. however I'll never understand why women wear the if they are that uncomfortable. I'm pretty sure I'm safe and won't ever have to try heels on because I'm pretty sure my feet are way too big .

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aquaguy91
Knowflake

Posts: 7124
From: tennessee
Registered: Jan 2012

posted August 15, 2013 12:40 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for aquaguy91     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Padre35:
Don't leave us in suspense Ms Prism, how did the evening turn out?

I do think the original video teaches a lot, some perhaps runs counter to what is known as "game" or "white knighting" advice.

For myself, perhaps showing my era, it is just common sense. One of the reasons imo that young guys are so rude or inconsiderate today is they view the world as "instant payoff sexually, or friendzone, one or the other".

To me, such gentlemanliness, is a man being a man at heart w/o a secondary motive, which "game" adherents would then retort with "but you did not have sex with them!"

True, the point of it all is not sex, it is being a male in the best sense of the term.

Which is one of the areas Mr AG has not quite gotten up to speed on as of yet.



Again you make assumptions. I'm a gentleman to all women. Even ones I'm not interested in romantically.

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Padre35
Knowflake

Posts: 2266
From: Asheville, NC, US
Registered: Jul 2012

posted August 15, 2013 12:42 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Padre35     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by aquaguy91:
[QUOTE]Originally posted by MsPrism:
[b] That's true, guys don't usually wear heels but I did try to explain it to him. He was just being a bit inconsiderate. We all have our moments of weakness.

He definitely knew what I meant after walking in them for a good 5 minutes!



Heels are sexy, I like tall women. however I'll never understand why women wear the if they are that uncomfortable. I'm pretty sure I'm safe and won't ever have to try heels on because I'm pretty sure my feet are way too big . [/B][/QUOTE]

B/c they look good on women.

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Padre35
Knowflake

Posts: 2266
From: Asheville, NC, US
Registered: Jul 2012

posted August 15, 2013 12:44 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Padre35     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by aquaguy91:
[QUOTE]Originally posted by Padre35:
[b]Don't leave us in suspense Ms Prism, how did the evening turn out?

I do think the original video teaches a lot, some perhaps runs counter to what is known as "game" or "white knighting" advice.

For myself, perhaps showing my era, it is just common sense. One of the reasons imo that young guys are so rude or inconsiderate today is they view the world as "instant payoff sexually, or friendzone, one or the other".

To me, such gentlemanliness, is a man being a man at heart w/o a secondary motive, which "game" adherents would then retort with "but you did not have sex with them!"

True, the point of it all is not sex, it is being a male in the best sense of the term.

Which is one of the areas Mr AG has not quite gotten up to speed on as of yet.



Again you make assumptions. I'm a gentleman to all women. Even ones I'm not interested in romantically.[/B][/QUOTE]

I say that is blatant AG.

Afterall one did mention one does not have female friends and one was disappointed when one did finally make a move and was rebuffed.

Are you still a gentleman to those who rebuffed you via politeness?

Or did you simply ghost out?

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MsPrism
Knowflake

Posts: 785
From:
Registered: Jun 2013

posted August 15, 2013 01:15 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for MsPrism     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Padre35:
Don't leave us in suspense Ms Prism, how did the evening turn out?

I do think the original video teaches a lot, some perhaps runs counter to what is known as "game" or "white knighting" advice.

For myself, perhaps showing my era, it is just common sense. One of the reasons imo that young guys are so rude or inconsiderate today is they view the world as "instant payoff sexually, or friendzone, one or the other".

To me, such gentlemanliness, is a man being a man at heart w/o a secondary motive, which "game" adherents would then retort with "but you did not have sex with them!"

True, the point of it all is not sex, it is being a male in the best sense of the term.


Haha After putting the man in heels and forcing him to walk around for awhile, I couldn't ignore his embarrassed and apologetic attitude, so it ended much better than I thought it would! I'll give others the benefit of the doubt usually because I've had friends that would feign pain to get attention.

I've heard of "white knighting" and I understand the disdain for it but it annoys me when men use the term to defend their insecurity. Example: A woman explains that a man helped her in some way and the man she explains the story to sees the difference in the behavior of the gentleman, the obvious approval of such behavior by their current female interest or partner and then condescendingly explains the definition of "white knighting" like it's the only option.

I love the idea of a true gentleman. The kind that does act the same for all people, not just their current interest.

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Padre35
Knowflake

Posts: 2266
From: Asheville, NC, US
Registered: Jul 2012

posted August 15, 2013 01:27 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Padre35     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by MsPrism:
Haha After putting the man in heels and forcing him to walk around for awhile, I couldn't ignore his embarrassed and apologetic attitude, so it ended much better than I thought it would! I'll give others the benefit of the doubt usually because I've had friends that would feign pain to get attention.

Eh, for myself, next to walking on the sun, denying Christ, and wearing heels, all are impossibilities for me at least*

(* I'd do it to raise money for cancer research or ALS if the charity had a proven track record)


quote:
I've heard of "white knighting" and I understand the disdain for it but it annoys me when men use the term to defend their insecurity. Example: A woman explains that a man helped her in some way and the man she explains the story to sees the difference in the behavior of the gentleman, the obvious approval of such behavior by their current female interest or partner and then condescendingly explains the definition of "white knighting" like it's the only option.

Difference being a man just does it w/o the hope of gaining some "in" with a woman, it's just what men do, a "white knight" does not do such things b/c it is what men do, it is b/c they "hope" in this eternal abyss of scarcity that "she'll really like me now!"

IMO, white knighting is not a regressive trait, done properly it is the manliest of traits, b/c the intent is clean so to speak.

Walk a blind person across the street it is not as if they will hand you a 20, what difference then?


quote:
I love the idea of a true gentleman. The kind that does act the same for all people, not just their current interest.

Indeed, imo it also adds currency to a manliness account that imo men should have for themselves internally.

Having a penis makes one no more of a man then having a beard, it is what men do for others and themselves that separates men from ill formed boys who rely on things outside of themselves to validate their manhood.

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aquaguy91
Knowflake

Posts: 7124
From: tennessee
Registered: Jan 2012

posted August 15, 2013 01:35 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for aquaguy91     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
QUOTE]Originally posted by Padre35:
I say that is blatant AG.

Afterall one did mention one does not have female friends and one was disappointed when one did finally make a move and was rebuffed.

Are you still a gentleman to those who rebuffed you via politeness?

Or did you simply ghost out?[/QUOTE]
Oh I'll be polite to them but I won't be close to them.

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Padre35
Knowflake

Posts: 2266
From: Asheville, NC, US
Registered: Jul 2012

posted August 15, 2013 01:37 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Padre35     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by aquaguy91:
QUOTE]Originally posted by Padre35:
[b] I say that is blatant AG.

Afterall one did mention one does not have female friends and one was disappointed when one did finally make a move and was rebuffed.

Are you still a gentleman to those who rebuffed you via politeness?

Or did you simply ghost out?



Oh I'll be polite to them but I won't be close to them.[/B][/QUOTE]

So one goes ghost?

IE, invisible, not bothering with etc?

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aquaguy91
Knowflake

Posts: 7124
From: tennessee
Registered: Jan 2012

posted August 15, 2013 01:40 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for aquaguy91     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Padre35:
So one goes ghost?

IE, invisible, not bothering with etc?



Not completely. But I do put distance there, to me it is too painful to just be close friends with a girl I have more of an interest in.

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Jessica2407
Moderator

Posts: 3532
From: Saturn
Registered: Sep 2012

posted August 15, 2013 01:44 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Jessica2407     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
How??

By not being a jerk.

Simple.

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