Author
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Topic: All the eggs in one basket or keeping options open?
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Hera Moderator Posts: 7227 From: Aries fantasy land ^_^ Registered: Sep 2010
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posted August 18, 2013 02:40 AM
Which are you? Which do you think it's best? Pros and cons? I think I used to be the all eggs in one basket type of girl. Taurus Venus and all. All that Neptune ugh.. But as I grow older and out of time (joking) I find this a bit unreasonable. Plus by now I've experienced all sorts of situations to know it's never so good that it can't get better with someone else and really, nobody is that irreplaceable. I think getting hung up on people really deprives us of worthy experiences. Sure, some people are really special, but with all those billions of people out there, there have to be MORE special people, MORE people with your kind of funky. So why get stuck on ONE single person??
Anyway, just ranting. This was this morning's epiphany. Hera wants to mingle, know MORE and MORE people. Eh. Scary discovery for an afflicted Cap rising.. ------------------ This girl is on FIRE LOVE, because what else is worth living for, and dying for?! Sandpaper kisses on a cheek or a chin That is the way for a day to begin. Sandpaper kisses, a cuddle and a purr I have an alarm clock that's covered in fur! IP: Logged |
Hera Moderator Posts: 7227 From: Aries fantasy land ^_^ Registered: Sep 2010
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posted August 18, 2013 03:02 AM
For the record, I am not referring to stable, committed relationships, where there are deep strong feelings, preferably mutual . Just, you know, the initial stages when nothing is set in stone. Was thinking of "Cold mountain" and how unrealistic that is nowadays. There's this Gemini I went to college with, we've been in the same city for 5 years and have not gone out ONCE. I'm thinking of asking him out sometime! I like what he's posting on my FB page lmao. I wanna go to the theater or the opera with him! I used to love our intellectual talks back in the day!
------------------ This girl is on FIRE LOVE, because what else is worth living for, and dying for?! Sandpaper kisses on a cheek or a chin That is the way for a day to begin. Sandpaper kisses, a cuddle and a purr I have an alarm clock that's covered in fur! IP: Logged |
Padre35 Knowflake Posts: 2286 From: Asheville, NC, US Registered: Jul 2012
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posted August 18, 2013 03:04 AM
Tough call, indeed every woman is replaceable, so are most men.My problem is I vibe off of what the other person is feeling and forget myself and me needs in the meanwhile. IP: Logged |
Hera Moderator Posts: 7227 From: Aries fantasy land ^_^ Registered: Sep 2010
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posted August 18, 2013 03:05 AM
quote: Originally posted by Padre35:
Tough call, indeed every woman is replaceable, so are most men.My problem is I vibe off of what the other person is feeling and forget myself and me needs in the meanwhile.
wtf, every woman is replaceable but only "most" men are???? Sexist much? IP: Logged |
Kerosene Knowflake Posts: 4309 From: Mercury Registered: Dec 2012
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posted August 18, 2013 03:15 AM
Im too fickle for that.. Jupiter is virgo too analytic to be optimistic about situations. I'm lucky in life because I don't make rash choices that could effect my entire life, unlike some people I know... In the back of my head, I always hear nothing is absolute and permanent. Every few months in relationships I like to talk to my partner and discuss things I feel we're both lacking and if we can't fulfill each others needs than I leave because I don't believe in commitment in that sense.
I feel like you should be with someone because you want to, not because you're obligated. that's bs and why I never want to get married. but love is a different story, I don't always fall in love and when I do it's hard... and torturous because it apart of me wants to go to the end of the earth for that person.... Take all my eggs fry them too.. **** love.. IP: Logged |
Hera Moderator Posts: 7227 From: Aries fantasy land ^_^ Registered: Sep 2010
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posted August 18, 2013 03:22 AM
I'm conflicted because I have Cancer DC and that can get clingy. But on the other hand Moon is in SAG in the 11th house. Gotta have FREEDOM, including of choice. It's good to have options, methinks. Tho it can also get confusing if it's too many. IP: Logged |
Kerosene Knowflake Posts: 4309 From: Mercury Registered: Dec 2012
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posted August 18, 2013 03:23 AM
I wish I had venus in virgo... :cIP: Logged |
Aries Eagle Knowflake Posts: 338 From: Mars & Moon Registered: Jan 2013
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posted August 18, 2013 03:25 AM
quote: Originally posted by Hera: Which are you? Which do you think it's best? Pros and cons? I think I used to be the all eggs in one basket type of girl. Taurus Venus and all. All that Neptune ugh.. But as I grow older and out of time (joking) I find this a bit unreasonable. Plus by now I've experienced all sorts of situations to know it's never so good that it can't get better with someone else and really, nobody is that irreplaceable. I think getting hung up on people really deprives us of worthy experiences. Sure, some people are really special, but with all those billions of people out there, there have to be MORE special people, MORE people with your kind of funky. So why get stuck on ONE single person??
Anyway, just ranting. This was this morning's epiphany. Hera wants to mingle, know MORE and MORE people. Eh. Scary discovery for an afflicted Cap rising..
I agree with her Royal Arien majesty. God bless ------------------ ★★★★★♈ General of the Army ♈★★★★★ IP: Logged |
Kerosene Knowflake Posts: 4309 From: Mercury Registered: Dec 2012
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posted August 18, 2013 03:28 AM
but most people in my life come and go like seasons. Just the fact of the matterIP: Logged |
PixieJane Moderator Posts: 2740 From: CA Registered: Oct 2010
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posted August 18, 2013 03:55 AM
quote: Originally posted by Hera: wtf, every woman is replaceable but only "most" men are???? Sexist much?
Maybe that's his personal experience, he found all women and most men he dated replaceable. Maybe you'll find an irreplaceable man as he has one day yourself. IP: Logged |
PixieJane Moderator Posts: 2740 From: CA Registered: Oct 2010
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posted August 18, 2013 03:59 AM
As for the actual question...for me I'm glad I experimented when I was younger, and that did sometimes mean being with multiple people (though never a true polyamorous relationship despite interest in trying one). Not so much today, I know what I want.I have A LOT of Sag in my chart and need my freedom...but that's more about being allowed to conduct my affairs my own way and allowed to have outside interests, friends, etc, without being micromanaged or having to deal with constant jealousy or being too clingy (though I've learned to accept at least a little of each and with more grace than I did when I was younger). IP: Logged |
charlie Knowflake Posts: 943 From: los angeles, ca, USA Registered: Jun 2012
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posted August 18, 2013 04:01 AM
Options are always open and abundant..IP: Logged |
Hera Moderator Posts: 7227 From: Aries fantasy land ^_^ Registered: Sep 2010
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posted August 18, 2013 04:02 AM
Lol Pix. Just sounded like he looked down on women. I wonder that way about Padre sometimes. He makes sure to always seem nice but there's the occasional Freudian slip. I do hope to find that irreplaceable man one day! But until then, next please!
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PixieJane Moderator Posts: 2740 From: CA Registered: Oct 2010
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posted August 18, 2013 04:04 AM
Btw, you might enjoy this book (and I've seen it as a library book if you don't mind getting it that way): http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Ethical_Slut This was the book that made me want to experiment with polyamory. IP: Logged |
12muddy Knowflake Posts: 559 From: Registered: Feb 2013
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posted August 18, 2013 04:35 AM
I kept my options open. I was one of those people who like to sample a thousand of samples I have that kind of “all or nothing” mentality when it comes to romantic relationships and I put everything on the line. That was why I felt that I should explore my wants and needs with different people before making a decision. Now that the decision has been made, I'm betting my life on it. IP: Logged |
12muddy Knowflake Posts: 559 From: Registered: Feb 2013
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posted August 18, 2013 04:36 AM
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Ami Anne Moderator Posts: 45192 From: Pluto/house next to NickiG Registered: Sep 2010
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posted August 18, 2013 07:45 AM
I don't see Padre as being sexist, Hera. You seem very defensive lately. Are you going through a period where you are forcing yourself to speak up? If so, I understand and do that, too.------------------ Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
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mockingbird Moderator Posts: 2054 From: Registered: Dec 2011
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posted August 18, 2013 07:59 AM
Did you read what he wrote, Ami?Do you have other reasoning for it? ------------------ If I've included this sig, it's because I'm posting from a mobile device. Please excuse all outrageous typos and confusing auto-corrects. IP: Logged |
Doux Rêve Moderator Posts: 5732 From: Registered: Dec 2010
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posted August 18, 2013 08:43 AM
Wow, Hera, I was literally thinking about that same topic yesterday night.. synchronicity, much? I agree with you. Unfortunately, I find it hard to keep my options open the moment someone gets under my skin. I try to think of different possibilities and not restrict myself to one person because I know things can get iffy real quick, but once my heart's in the equation, it's pretty much unmovable. That sucks cause I tend to have a tunnel vision when it comes to stuff like that.
But I have the ability to rationalize my feelings and basically make them fade forcefully, if I focus my mind and thoughts in that direction. It's not easy but possible.
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Padre35 Knowflake Posts: 2286 From: Asheville, NC, US Registered: Jul 2012
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posted August 18, 2013 11:05 AM
quote: Originally posted by Hera: wtf, every woman is replaceable but only "most" men are???? Sexist much?
Think about it for a moment Hera, as a man, I view men from my pov and "know" how we are moreso than a women, from that pov I'd think some men would be irreplacable but they wind up getting replaced anyway. For example, my neighbor has a host of issues, both mental and physical, she has a livein BF who takes care of virtually everything, yet she is going to give him the boot and just wants to live alone. She has a blow and go(multiple DWI's), has not worked in 2 yrs, addicted to both booze and uses a ton of pot and literally has -0- means of support aside from her livein BF. From my pov, he's irreplacable, if the situation were reversed, I'd say the same about her. She has 2 teenaged children, no job, and is just going to dump him, imo for her he is irreplaceable, yet he will be replaced. IP: Logged |
Padre35 Knowflake Posts: 2286 From: Asheville, NC, US Registered: Jul 2012
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posted August 18, 2013 11:09 AM
quote: Originally posted by mockingbird: Did you read what he wrote, Ami?Do you have other reasoning for it?
I was not trying to be sexist, not at all, I do have a very different pov from a woman's pov and that is the reason why I wrote what I wrote. Granted I'm not running for public office so I'm free to hold whatever opinion I wish to hold with no apologies (this being a public forum there are rules both written and unwritten concerning decorum). IP: Logged |
Ami Anne Moderator Posts: 45192 From: Pluto/house next to NickiG Registered: Sep 2010
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posted August 18, 2013 11:12 AM
I like straight talk. With all the political correctness about sexism, men have become wet noddles because they are afraid to offend women who will call them sexist over every little thing. I look like a girl but think like a man ------------------ Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
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somethingexcellent Knowflake Posts: 2342 From: vodka fine, I'm so divine Registered: Nov 2012
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posted August 18, 2013 11:31 AM
quote: Padre: From my pov, he's irreplacable, if the situation were reversed, I'd say the same about her.
Ah, so then what you said was simply misleading. IP: Logged |
Padre35 Knowflake Posts: 2286 From: Asheville, NC, US Registered: Jul 2012
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posted August 18, 2013 11:40 AM
quote: Originally posted by somethingexcellent: Ah, so then what you said was simply misleading.
Perhaps, however it is undeniable that in society such a man would be looked down upon if the situation was reversed. IP: Logged |
aquaguy91 Moderator Posts: 7220 From: tennessee Registered: Jan 2012
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posted August 18, 2013 11:40 AM
lets just say this, nobody is getting loyalty from me unless they earn it.IP: Logged |