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Author Topic:   Facebook Breakups..
Odette
Knowflake

Posts: 3585
From:
Registered: May 2012

posted February 18, 2014 12:13 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Odette     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
.. and friendship meltdowns!

We were talking about FB some time ago.. and I was telling people how I am FB-anal.. and don't really add people who are close to me, specially someone I am romantically involved with. I am using it as a second linkedin basically.. and I'm making it impersonal.

I've had a lot of issues previously with FB.. and a bunch of my relationships have turned ugly as a result of FB.
The last one was the worst. We had way too many mutual friends and these people were caught-up in our breakup.
He often used FB to get attention or try to upset me.

Have you ever had something similar happen...?
Do you think FB can be responsible for a lot of unnecessary negativity in relationships?
http://www.prevention.com/sex/sex-relationships/facebook-contributes-surprisin g-number-break-ups
http://www.gurl.com/2013/02/06/cause-of-breakup/

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DeepFreeze
Knowflake

Posts: 950
From: Pluto with Barbiegirl19
Registered: Nov 2013

posted February 18, 2014 01:04 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for DeepFreeze     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Well I agree.
It's no secret that Barbiegirl19 and I are together.
Now, she didn't have one when we got together simply because of the drama that happens there and etc. Guys bugging her all the time.

I had one but got rid of it when we got together. For different reasons - not the relationship exactly. More of a protection of privacy.

Weeks later we talked about it and both agreed to just leave them off. Just to not have any Facebook. Neither really cares or has any particular addiction to it and both agree that it can be stressful on a relationship. We have fun interacting here and pointing out topics to each other and etc. We don't miss FB at all.

Of course, many will argue about trust, using self-control while using FB, etc etc. Really, we don't need any self-control to just not have them. It's completely unimportant to either of us so we just say, "heck with it. Why even put that possibility out there at all if we don't care about FB in the first place?"

I have had situations where there was a breakup involving mutual friends and FB. It was never really problem though. Normally, if they weren't THAT close of friends I just drop them too. LOL Kind of stupid I know but it's just me.

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12muddy
Knowflake

Posts: 1425
From:
Registered: Feb 2013

posted February 18, 2014 03:57 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for 12muddy     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hmm I used to stay away from those sort of things but a while ago I opened a facebook account and so far nothing has happened to me but I've seen some funny things.

I'm not sure if facebook is responsible, it's just a tool - how people use it is up to them.

The most frequent thing that I've seen is tracking one another. People track comments and "likes" made by their friends, romantic interests and partners, then draw all kinds of conclusions from it.

And the "relationship status", all sorts of drama revolve around it. Whenever a person changes his/her relationship status, everyone jumps in and starts asking questions

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Sibyl
Knowflake

Posts: 41
From:
Registered: Dec 2010

posted February 18, 2014 05:51 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Sibyl     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
No drama on my facebook, I only have good experiences and I LOVE IT. It's just another way to connect with people in my opinion, and that in itself is is fantastic. It's great for me because I'm a member of so many different social groups and have friends all over the world. It is often the easiest way to keep in touch. It's also really nice to be up to date with what people are doing, really. I like knowing that my former classmates and friends are doing well, and to get a tiny look at what they're up to. It also makes it so much easier to connect if we should find ourselves in the same situation/locality at some point, which I find happens all the time really. Facebook makes it so easy to casually exit and enter other people's lives without it having to be a big deal or a great effort.

I don't believe personal observations and feelings belong on there though. The ones who seem to have trouble with understanding boundaries on facebook also seems to be the older generation (meaning people 40 plus). I think younger people get the social code much better and understand not to overshare.

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Yin
Knowflake

Posts: 3288
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted February 18, 2014 06:06 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Yin     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
The only drama I've had on FB was with people from LL! I still have some LL connections on there but luckily the dramatic "friendships" have dissolved.

Other than that, my FB is pretty much the way Sibyl described hers - a happy place to keep in touch and share with people from all over. I don't mind the "oversharing" part, it's human.

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Ami Anne
Moderator

Posts: 52716
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010

posted February 18, 2014 07:53 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Ami Anne     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
The more outspoken I get, the more people love me or hate me.

The ones who hate me block me or de-friend me but the ones who like me stay.

That is the best way to be

------------------
Want To Ask Any Question About Bible Prophecy? Go For it. It is Free, of course.


http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/

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Kerosene
Knowflake

Posts: 8936
From: Mercury
Registered: Dec 2012

posted February 18, 2014 09:08 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Kerosene     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I don't have one I don't need one I don't care about acquaintances because if I wanted to be there friend I would give them my number . We have iPhones now Facebook is obsolete

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Yin
Knowflake

Posts: 3288
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted February 18, 2014 09:21 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Yin     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Not everyone worships king Apple. There are fairer kings our there... and more generous Social media users come from all ages and walks of life.

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Hera
Moderator

Posts: 8585
From: Jupiter
Registered: Sep 2010

posted February 18, 2014 11:24 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Hera     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by 12muddy:
I'm not sure if facebook is responsible, it's just a tool - how people use it is up to them.



My sentiment exactly.

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YoursTrulyAlways
Knowflake

Posts: 6723
From:
Registered: Oct 2011

posted February 18, 2014 11:38 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for YoursTrulyAlways     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I use FB actively. No issues with it. People on my FB page, like Ami, pretty much see my life. No drama.

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Violets
Moderator

Posts: 2399
From: Twin Peaks
Registered: Apr 2011

posted February 18, 2014 12:02 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Violets     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I've never really experienced a lot of drama on Facebook...hardly any, actually. My youngest brother and my step-daughter, who are 26 and 24, are on there and they don't stir up a lot of drama, so I don't think it's just due to my age group. A lot of my friends are in their early thirties as well, and they're fairly quiet about their personal stuff for the most part.

There have been two times where I've sliced and diced a couple of grown women for posting some pretty stupid and hypocritical memes, and one woman unfriended me. She was an acquaintance through my ex sister in-law, so it wasn't a loss.

Other than that, I had one friend (the wife of a guy I went to high school with, who happened to live in the same town we had moved to)... She would constantly make passive-aggressive, contradictory comments on a lot of things I posted, so I just put her on my "restricted" list.

So she messaged me and asked me why, and although I didn't really want to get into it, I went out of my way to politely explain my viewpoint.
So then she started posting passive-aggressive stuff on her own page about how "some people just don't want to hear others' opinions on Facebook" and then put me on her restricted list, so I just blocked her. We weren't good friends or anything, and I found her really annoying.

After that, she called me twice and left messages trying to remedy the non-issue, which I thought was a little whacko, since we had only hung out twice and weren't really even good friends.

So those are my Facebook drama stories.
The End.

I don't post much about my small personal woes, although I do swear a lot.

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Violets
Moderator

Posts: 2399
From: Twin Peaks
Registered: Apr 2011

posted February 18, 2014 12:11 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Violets     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Also, for the most part...I've learned that if I don't want other peoples' political or religious (or non-religious) beliefs shoved down my throat via my Facebook newsfeed, I should probably offer the same courtesy to others.

And I generally don't argue with people who post stuff that I don't agree with. I find it rude, although it did happen a couple of times over the years.

So I don't spout my political or spiritual opinions on there, and if someone consistently posts annoying crap that I don't agree with, I either put them on "hide" if they're people I have some sort of tie with, or I quietly unfriend them.

It doesn't mean that I hate them. I unfriend people all the time if I don't interact with them much and don't know them well. It keeps me from having 500 people on there who don't need to hear about my petty grievances or odd expeditions.

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Randall
Webmaster

Posts: 37672
From: Saturn next to Charmainec
Registered: Apr 2009

posted February 21, 2014 05:04 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I keep it for LL groups and for the ability to contact Knowflakes when LL goes down. I'm barely there otherwise.

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