Lindaland
  Sweet Peas In The Rain
  I don't get humanity (Page 1)

Post New Topic  Post A Reply
profile | register | preferences | faq

UBBFriend: Email This Page to Someone!
This topic is 2 pages long:   1  2 
next newest topic | next oldest topic
Author Topic:   I don't get humanity
DaniPepper87
Moderator

Posts: 1626
From: Curitiba, Brasil
Registered: Sep 2013

posted February 18, 2014 01:53 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for DaniPepper87     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
That mood is coming back...

Yesterday, I was in the bus, with a lot of people, rainning day... I'm trying to life a simple life, so my mobile don't have music... and then I noticed... angry, sadness, pain, hopeless and the worse it could be... EVIL! For the first time I notice a woman with evil eyes, looking at another woman, who was there just looking at a Facebook page... I got truly sad.

I got home and finally cried. The cry was from within my heart... why do people need to be evil? It's not easy to live, I know, wee need to study, work and have energy for family... but all this energy is wasted on hate. I see people with smartphones but need to pay a rent house.... people who have 4000 friends on Facebook and are empty into the soul... people who want to be a lot and don't know what to do to conquer that peace of spirit.

I'm tired of this. Tired of people who come to you just to mess your life. Tired of people who just come to you to get something having nothing to share... or just take things from you. Tired of people who come to laugh at your face when you say something from the deep of your heart, saying that it is a joke. Tired of people who says to me that I don't know love. The real thing is: I don't get evil... Sometimes I tried to be evil, my gut was in too much pain I needed to go to medicine man!!

Sorry, another post where I'm down, but I really don't get it....

IP: Logged

Ellynlvx
Moderator

Posts: 5847
From: Mountain Gate
Registered: Aug 2013

posted February 18, 2014 06:31 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Ellynlvx     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Well, in the Immortal Words of one I truly respect:

"The world will go as it will, and not as you or I would have it."

It is what it is, Dani, and all we can do is our best.

We can't make decisions for other people, we just have to do what we know is right.


You have a good heart, and I love you dearly.

Keep your chin up, Sweetie.

I'm pulling for you.

IP: Logged

Ami Anne
Moderator

Posts: 53116
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010

posted February 18, 2014 07:41 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Ami Anne     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Dani

I think your 12th House planets make you more sensitive than a person without them and those deep feelings may well up inside without your knowing how to express them and this may make the sadness.
Does that fit, my dear Friend?

------------------
Want To Ask Any Question About Bible Prophecy? Go For it. It is Free, of course.


http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/

IP: Logged

PixieJane
Moderator

Posts: 3865
From: CA
Registered: Oct 2010

posted February 18, 2014 07:42 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for PixieJane     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
When I was a runaway I saw a lot of evil in pure form, some of it even without apology or masquerade, it was held as a virtue, sometimes on the belief that everyone had to choose between being a wolf (evil) and a lamb (good) which got so absurd that it wasn't unknown for a robber to panhandle only to rob the person who actually tried to help (and there are scams that target the kindhearted considering them weak and stupid, thus easy prey). Some of the hardened criminals and sociopaths found my questions as annoying, disturbing, and infuriating as my teachers did and I think my age (appearing even younger than I was due to delayed puberty without getting tall) & gender, along with a protective Krew and perhaps my tone of voice that showed only curiosity and not disrespect, was all that kept me alive a couple of times.

I asked one guy bragging about his drive by shootings why they couldn't learn to aim, especially as they shot kids which I'd think would get vigilantes after them (Texas). He thought my question was hilarious and said killing kids just terrorized others into making sure they weren't opposed (and if they were kids of the one they were after then they DESERVED to get shot, same blood), vigilantes were rare and suicidal anyway, all in all no one messed with them for fear of their kids winding up dead, too. I'd later find out that such executions & killings were used to great effect among more structured criminal organizations, plenty of criminals would rather do hard time or even be executed (or to accept sexual slavery) than condemn their families to death. Plenty of child molesters will also threaten their victims with killing their parents, or parents will threaten their pets. (Though one evil pair of parents tried to force their daughter to shoot her own dog as punishment for coming in past curfew but she shot herself instead, the parents weren't charged with child abuse or for the teen's death at all).

Me and other runaways also shared a squat with adult homeless, one we got along with whom we called Pappy, a Vietnam vet turned heroin addict. I learned fast that you don't ask people what they did before the streets, but while he was garrulous on drugs talking about Vietnam I did ask...holy crap! The guy had been forced to join the Army after busted for a little weed...got busted a 2nd time and he was shipped off to Vietnam. There he partook in debauchery (sexual and drugs) far crazier than he'd even imagined, including opiates, though at first he stuck to pot and booze. Then his unit was made to track down the enemy and then ordered to open fire, though he wouldn't look at them as he did because that felt too much like murder. And then he described a gory cleanup in which many noncombatants had been massacred and he was told that this village gave support to the enemy rather than being the enemy itself. He was so sickened and freaked that when he was offered opiates to help calm himself he took them, but was never the same.

Once he came back to the States he cleaned up for awhile and started his own family but as his own babies grew into children he couldn't help but recall the children he'd helped kill and dispose of, crushing guilt came to him, his friends wouldn't talk to him about it which might have saved him if they had, and he sought opiates again, finally getting on H. He got busted for it, in and out of prison, lost his family, and finally on the streets looking for his next fix where he met me. He grabbed me hard and demanded to know why there was such evil in the world, why? I suppose I should've been scared and yet I knew he was clutching at me like someone drowning rather than angry at me, and I told him I didn't know. He let me go and said I was smart, I had to find out for him, because he couldn't figure it out. And that was the last time I saw him alive (I have no idea if he OD later on purpose or not). It haunted me for years and did get me to ask why there is such evil in the world.

I think it was a sincere plea for understanding, to give meaning to the horrors he'd endured in the world. I hope he found it in the next life (as I reached pinnacles in understanding in previous years I tried projecting what I learned to him in case he still has a conscious existence after the death of his body), and more importantly I hope he found the love and mercy he knew so little of in life.

Should you not wish to understand, to only want someone to hold you saying, "there, there," then I can't help you with that. Rending your garments over it does no good to you or anyone else, in fact the inability to come to terms with it could lead you to experience a lot more of it that leads to your self-destruction as it did Pappy, and I wouldn't wish that on anyone. But if you want some pointers and clues to look for in actually understanding it so that you can deal with it and put it in its proper place (hopefully without becoming evil yourself in trying to fight evil) then the next post of mine is for you.

IP: Logged

PixieJane
Moderator

Posts: 3865
From: CA
Registered: Oct 2010

posted February 18, 2014 07:56 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for PixieJane     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
In many cases people are made to feel small or bad (to better control them) so they in turn make others feel small or bad to make themselves feel bigger, even on top if only for a little while (sorta like vampire & zombie bites). This is usually the lesser evils that you're most likely to see though in its extreme form can lead to sanctioned torture, inquisitions, executions. In similar fashion envy can make people feel that something has been taken from them (when it was never theirs to begin with) which usually (but not always) comes from an overblown sense of entitlement which I presume was instilled in them by dogmas of discrimination and/or spoiling them more than they should as a child.

True unapologetic evil seems rare to me (otherwise, why would we have to dress up our evils in righteous terms?), but it exists. In these cases it's more about an inability to see others as real, or having been raised the victim of evil they have no other way to relate to others. (I don't consider brutish survival when no other option is seen to be itself evil, however.)

And then there's the philosophical kind. Generally speaking they believe that things like kindness, mercy, even justice are antithetical to civilization, that it was the strong, cruel, and smart that created greatness and that the so-called "kind and fair" is seen as a means by which the undeserving are placed and maintained in positions of power which in turn makes their civilization weak and vulnerable by softheaded fools. In an ideal world they believe those too weak to defend their positions, possessions, and life don't deserve them ("Those who want to live, let them fight, and those who do not want to fight in this world of eternal struggle do not deserve to live" --Hitler) and also promote social darwinism ("My grandmother was not a highly educated woman, but she told me as a small child to quit feeding stray animals. You know why? Because they breed. You’re facilitating the problem if you give an animal or a person ample food supply. They will reproduce, especially ones that don’t think too much further than that. And so what you’ve got to do is you’ve got to curtail that type of behavior. They don’t know any better." --Bauer speaking on why free school lunches were bad despite that he himself benefited as a child). Naturally, most believe that their values are good, some even mix them with religions like Christianity (as Bauer and Hitler did, though only those individuals can truly say how sincere they were in their stated beliefs). Machiavelli (in The Prince) also described why the key to power was to be feared rather than loved (though best if you could be both).

And that leads to the most frightening type of evil to me: those who are righteous in it. These are the people who talk of holy wars (can be against Muslims as much as by them, btw), crusades, inquisitions, can support Chick Fil A who in turn supported Exodus International that were funding and promoting "kill the gays" bills in Africa (also supported by the pope at the time), and even justify vigilante murder. Many of these types have standards of behavior so strict that they themselves can't live up to them, but unable to face up to it they then project to elevate themselves from a position of moral superiority (from the adulterer, child molester, or compulsively masturbates who then hates on gays to feel better about themselves, to the parent who adopts kids from other countries to abuse, to even projecting on EVERYONE not of his/her inner circle), and they have no conscious awareness that they're actually hating what's in themselves rather than what's in others, that is that they're seeing their own reflection in those they claim to hate but failing to recognize it (or to see the actual person). For a brilliant description of this process read People of the Lie (here's a brief summary). The scariest part is that many of them truly believe that they're fighting evil rather than are evil (that is dominance, or at least seeking ascension or not being prosecuted, by inflicting suffering on others) which means that it's harder to fight because their warped rationalizations have to be torn down (and they won't let you do that, at least not to them), and they're actually compelled by their conscience to be evil!

Scary world that we live in. I've learned to accept this like bad weather and fire ants, or even hurricanes and earthquakes, however. Though for what it's worth I think true evil (a habit of willfully harming others to get ahead or even to experience pleasure) is rare, like true goodness (willfully helping others when it's of no obvious benefit to you, generally because it brings an intangible happiness, not to be confused with the evil who put themselves in a position to help people in order to abuse and/or exploit helpless victims). Most just do what's convenient, be it good or evil, and generally need a compelling reason to act kindly or viciously when it's not in their own self-interest to. Nevertheless, because of the ability of evil to masquerade itself as good (so that many evil hearts even deceive themselves) it can be spread easily and adopted by those who go with the flow without thinking too much about it, and even those of good heart can be tricked into serving evil. Meanwhile, true goodness isn't as obvious, doesn't grab headlines, or makes itself known anywhere as vividly (fear and pain demand our attention much more than kindness) so it seems less prevalent than it is. However, the truly evil are much more willing to embrace power, game the system, and tell people what they want to hear than the truly good so the truly evil do have an upper hand when it comes to everyday lives ("scum rises to the top"), though when evil can be recognized then the neutrals/apathetics will generally turn on them recognizing the evil as a threat to them and their loved ones as well (but they don't want to have true goodness foisted on them either even if they prefer the good to the evil as neighbors). It's a delicate balance.

IP: Logged

PixieJane
Moderator

Posts: 3865
From: CA
Registered: Oct 2010

posted February 18, 2014 08:11 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for PixieJane     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
A novel I once read (I can't recommend it unless you're already familiar with the series in which case you should already know of it) once gave a metaphysical reason for why evil should be appreciated (paraphrased to avoid confusion): "In a world of endless ease, with no suffering to build strength, no anguish to breed courage, no fear to foster cunning would breed a world of middling passions and bland hungers, where nothing is ventured because nothing can be lost, where no anger is consuming, no love passionate, and no life worth living."

It's worth thinking about, IMO, if you bother with metaphysics (which I'd assume the vast majority of those who come to LL do).

IP: Logged

Faith
Knowflake

Posts: 6991
From:
Registered: Jul 2011

posted February 18, 2014 08:22 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Faith     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
WOW Pixie. Great read.

I can only handle thoughts of evil, misery, torture, children getting hit by cars, psycho killers, factory farming, Christian colleges training their students how to kill innocent people in the Middle East with predator drones...I can only handle thinking of all these horrors when I am in certain moods. Glad I am in one of those moods right now because this is an interesting conversation.

My quote contribution along those lines:

"In order for men to do great evil, they must first believe they are doing good."

-Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn, Gulag Archipelago

IP: Logged

Faith
Knowflake

Posts: 6991
From:
Registered: Jul 2011

posted February 18, 2014 09:02 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Faith     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Oh and by the way, PJ, thanks for the Exodus International information, I never heard of that group before...or if I did, I forgot.

The wikipedia page on them is interesting and like a comedy of errors in some respects.

Though not the Ugandan genocide plans. Frickin unbelievable!!!

IP: Logged

StarlightSmileSupreme
Knowflake

Posts: 7794
From: neptune
Registered: Nov 2012

posted February 18, 2014 09:49 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for StarlightSmileSupreme     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Whenever I see threads like this I always wonder what it is you are seeing. They always leave me wondering what it is. How evil could she have looked and why was she looking that way? Was she angry because someone was on their mobile or was it because she wanted to steal it? What if someone said some hateful things to her, cussed her out, and that's why she had this look in her eyes.
Her feet could be hurting from shoes not fitting properly. I know that's very uncomfortable.
Or she could have smoked some crack cocaine maybe?
There could be so many reasons why she has this look.
I agree with you about all the other stuff...when people think it's fun to mess with others or do rotten things it ruins my day.

IP: Logged

Odette
Knowflake

Posts: 3646
From:
Registered: May 2012

posted February 18, 2014 11:02 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Odette     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Whenever I see threads like this I always wonder what it is you are seeing.

Tell me about it.

quote:
I see people with smartphones but need to pay a rent house

?

What do you mean? The person who has a smartphone is renting a place?
Or are you saying that they have smartphone - while you have to pay your rent?

I don't know.. In the Western world.. We work.. we make as much money as we are able to (which is usually not too shabby, in comparison to other places) .. and then we choose how to spend it - depending on our priorities.

IP: Logged

PixieJane
Moderator

Posts: 3865
From: CA
Registered: Oct 2010

posted February 18, 2014 11:03 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for PixieJane     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote

IP: Logged

PixieJane
Moderator

Posts: 3865
From: CA
Registered: Oct 2010

posted February 18, 2014 11:05 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for PixieJane     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Yeah, there's no way to know for sure why one glared at another woman...she may have had a very good reason for it, or maybe not. Since there's no way to ever know I've chosen not to focus on the particular incident and instead focus on the actual inquiry inspired by it.

IP: Logged

StarlightSmileSupreme
Knowflake

Posts: 7794
From: neptune
Registered: Nov 2012

posted February 18, 2014 11:48 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for StarlightSmileSupreme     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Odette - I felt the same about a thread you posted, lol. It's funny you quoted that part of my post since I was remembering your thread.

IP: Logged

DaniPepper87
Moderator

Posts: 1626
From: Curitiba, Brasil
Registered: Sep 2013

posted February 19, 2014 06:42 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for DaniPepper87     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Odette:
?

What do you mean? The person who has a smartphone is renting a place?
Or are you saying that they have smartphone - while you have to pay your rent?

I don't know.. In the Western world.. We work.. we make as much money as we are able to (which is usually not too shabby, in comparison to other places) .. and then we choose how to spend it - depending on our priorities.


Hi Odette

The thing is: people here where I live, says they don't have money enough to have a good life... and I don't thing a smartphone can give them a good life.... Here, brazilian people wants to have a good house, to be stable... but what I see is people buying non useful things, and then throw all the problems in God's hand or in the governament. They don't go after things... they just sit and wait and complain.

For the lady with evil eyes... no, she was not into drugs... unfortunately I know when people use drugs... i know the look they give.

What I see and don't like is: people want respect, but don't give it. People want love, but don't demostrate it 'cause you can get hurt. People want money but don't want to work (at least here where I live).

IP: Logged

DaniPepper87
Moderator

Posts: 1626
From: Curitiba, Brasil
Registered: Sep 2013

posted February 19, 2014 06:44 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for DaniPepper87     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Ellynlvx:
Well, in the Immortal Words of one I truly respect:

"The world will go as it will, and not as you or I would have it."

It is what it is, Dani, and all we can do is our best.

We can't make decisions for other people, we just have to do what we know is right.


You have a good heart, and I love you dearly.

Keep your chin up, Sweetie.

I'm pulling for you.


Ah Ellyn.... I love your words.... Yes, I truth believe this... but all I get from this is the situation I said... I try my best, then comes a person who thinks is God and want you to behave like then... and then if you don't agree... they'll destroy you.

Sometimes I sense I'm an ET into this world...

IP: Logged

DaniPepper87
Moderator

Posts: 1626
From: Curitiba, Brasil
Registered: Sep 2013

posted February 19, 2014 06:52 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for DaniPepper87     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Ami Anne:
Dani

I think your 12th House planets make you more sensitive than a person without them and those deep feelings may well up inside without your knowing how to express them and this may make the sadness.
Does that fit, my dear Friend?


Ah Ami

Can be, but I'm really upset with things I see lately in this world. People complain but don't do anything to better the situation.

Sometimes I feel that I'm too sensitive for this world. People see me as an innocent girl (I'm not saying that I'm not), but take this and try to hurt me. Why to hurt people who don't know a thing you passed through your life?

For me, Mars in the 12th is difficult... I sense I have no energy, and all I can do is sit and cry for all of this... I try to help people, but they usually get accommodated and think I need to feed them up...

IP: Logged

Ami Anne
Moderator

Posts: 53116
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010

posted February 19, 2014 08:34 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Ami Anne     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Yes, Dani
Your angst is your chart imo. I think we see through the lens of our charts.

I was thinking of how some people have been very dismissive of my pain with my mother.

I have Chiron in the 4th. They tell me to get over it and I have many blessings etc

HOWEVER, that is my pain from the chart placement.
People will see my blessings and think I am wallowing but it is MY angst.

Hence, I see it in a way they don't.

They may have Chiron in the 2nd and their angst is money. They may look at me and think that I don't have this problem so I should shut up.

I say this only to say that one needs to know one's chart very intimately. One lives out one's chart.

I need to check out your 12th house planets again when I look at your chart and their aspects.
Do a new thread with your chart and we will talk about the 12th House planets only.

That way I will focus on them.

On the other hand, where one has gifts, one cannot really understand the struggles of another. I can communicate easily. I can't really understand someone who cannot.

You see? You need to really, really look at your chart and try to realize that this is you, for better or worse, and to accept it, in my opinion.

Acceptance is the key to peace, I think.

To me, God can overcome the charts but that is all.

That is my 2 cents and others may not agree.


PS I am having an ease of the burden of my mother from my relationship with God. However, I think the House of Chiron kind of stays as our pain house for our whole life. Others do not agree with this, either, but it is my opinion.

------------------
Want To Ask Any Question About Bible Prophecy? Go For it. It is Free, of course.


http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/

IP: Logged

DaniPepper87
Moderator

Posts: 1626
From: Curitiba, Brasil
Registered: Sep 2013

posted February 19, 2014 09:04 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for DaniPepper87     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Ah Ami!!

Yes, I see this, but the real thing is I don't understand why people come into our lives and mess it all... just for fun!!!

I'm gonna throw myself into my chart study to see what can I do to live better... and I'm gonna make another post with my planets...

Thanks for all Ami... God bless you always!!

IP: Logged

Ami Anne
Moderator

Posts: 53116
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010

posted February 19, 2014 10:29 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Ami Anne     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Well, I am gonna write an article on this because it is coming to me and what usually helps me helps others.
I think it is about personal power. You cannot control jerks who come into your life. To me, the worst jerks are Anti Semites. They are there and one cannot hide from them. One must learn to deal with the horrid people who assail one.
We each have different kinds of horrid people but the theory is the same.
One has to learn to take control of the situation and beat them down, when need be, and there is a time for it.
One cannot bemoan the existence of these people. One must be stronger than they are and make THEM back down.
Then, one has found one's personal power and can use it, when needed.
Once one has one's power, one can walk away. Also, then most people won't mess with you because they won't like the fall out.
It sucks that life is like this but it is and without knowing it, you will be taken advantage by the few horrible people out there.
Most people are not this way but a few are and for those few, you need to learn to be strong

------------------
Want To Ask Any Question About Bible Prophecy? Go For it. It is Free, of course.


http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/

IP: Logged

Randall
Webmaster

Posts: 38160
From: Saturn next to Charmainec
Registered: Apr 2009

posted February 20, 2014 02:09 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
For good to exist, there must be evil. That is the world we live in.

IP: Logged

Ami Anne
Moderator

Posts: 53116
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010

posted February 21, 2014 12:48 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Ami Anne     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
How are you doing, Dani?

------------------
Want To Ask Any Question About Bible Prophecy? Go For it. It is Free, of course.


http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/

IP: Logged

DaniPepper87
Moderator

Posts: 1626
From: Curitiba, Brasil
Registered: Sep 2013

posted February 21, 2014 12:58 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for DaniPepper87     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Ah hi Ami!!

Well, now I'm a little calmer than some days ago. I turned to spirituality and pray a little, that gave me relief. But I'm still sad. Maybe this is the stage I'm under the healing process. No, I'm not crying anymore because of my ex, but now, my heart is closed. For me, it is had to believe that someone will come and love me again. As we say here... out for balance.

And one great friend of mine told me to not take this world too serious, to give a smile and going on. But it is not easy for me... as Scorpio one, I take life so serious... I'm still learning...

Thanks for all the support people here give me... mainly you, Ami, and Ellyn... Randall wrote one thing that I agree, but I see too much evil for so little good...

IP: Logged

Ami Anne
Moderator

Posts: 53116
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010

posted February 21, 2014 01:44 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Ami Anne     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I will get back to your chart when I am done with the professional chart I am doing.

------------------
Want To Ask Any Question About Bible Prophecy? Go For it. It is Free, of course.


http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/

IP: Logged

DaniPepper87
Moderator

Posts: 1626
From: Curitiba, Brasil
Registered: Sep 2013

posted February 21, 2014 01:53 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for DaniPepper87     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
No worries Ami, do things in your own time...

IP: Logged

Randall
Webmaster

Posts: 38160
From: Saturn next to Charmainec
Registered: Apr 2009

posted February 21, 2014 02:32 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
There's lots of good. You just have to know where to look.

IP: Logged


This topic is 2 pages long:   1  2 

All times are Eastern Standard Time

next newest topic | next oldest topic

Administrative Options: Close Topic | Archive/Move | Delete Topic
Post New Topic  Post A Reply
Hop to:

Contact Us | Linda-Goodman.com

Copyright 2000-2014

Powered by Infopop www.infopop.com © 2000
Ultimate Bulletin Board 5.46a