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Author Topic:   How Depression Feels To Me
Ami Anne
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Posts: 57179
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010

posted September 27, 2014 07:48 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Ami Anne     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote

The Marshmallow FogóóDepression

The Marshmallow fog descends on me. You think I would want to let it go but I donít.

It has been a long time since I let myself be known. I ache like one who longs for cheese cake safely put away in the freezer. It calls until one eats it piece by piece but then one gets tired of being dainty and shoves the whole thing in oneís mouth. The fog is related in ways that make your head throb like algebra when it reaches the place that you could throw the book against the wall.I digress so easily because I donít want to tell you.

Well, let me start at the beginning. I had one thing too many happen. When the final event hit, I became like Alice descending down the rabbit hole, spinning like there was no tomorrow. When I hit the bottom and stood up, I was muffled like sound coming from far away. You strain to hear but you can barely make out words. I stayed that way as if a thousand cotton balls hit me and entwined in my internal organs.

I suppose there was a Pre Marshmallow Fog and a Post Marshmallow Fog. In the Pre Fog, I was normal. In the Post Fog, I was like a walking corpse.When the fog rolled in, it was heavy. The darkness was like melting chocolate covering me like I was in the middle of an chocolate Easter Bunny candy or chocolate Santa Claus..When I tried to leave, the doors were enclosed in chocolate, as were the windows.

That brings me to the present. The Marshmallow Fog is like a heavy blanket that may feel nice at the beginning of the night but is cloying by the end. It is like sitting next to a woman with too much perfume. I will give them dirty looks or even request that my chair be moved. It is an affront. I wish I could have moved my chair as easily from the Marshmallow Fog but it was stuck to the floor, as they used to do with childrenís desks in elementary school. They wanted to keep the child from moving and disturbing the peace.

I suppose that is why the Fog came in the first place. It prevented me from disturbing the peace in the Alice in Wonderland world in which I lived. Reality was like a kailidoscope, colors turning and revolving such as to make you sick if you didnít close your eyes. I closed my eyes. What choice did I have? It was that or insanity. The fog blankets the insanity so you have a semblance of your real self like the zombies who look human until they reach critical mass and take over the town.

I hope you donít mind my rambling. You can tell I am trying to figure it out.The Fog is lifting these days. Under it is pain like fire, pain that shoots forth, my body rocking. I donít know the outcome. It is an unknown destination, as they say.

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Ellynlvx
Knowflake

Posts: 10125
From: the Point of Light within the Mind of God
Registered: Aug 2013

posted September 27, 2014 09:56 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Ellynlvx     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I can actually see that darkness, when people near me feel it.

It does roll, just like fog.

Sometimes when I look to the Mountain outside my door, I consider the way the fog rolls, and I always think of Tolkien.

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teasel
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Posts: 6398
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Registered: Apr 2009

posted September 27, 2014 01:19 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for teasel     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
My fog had lifted, but it's back in a big way. I'm sorry that you've been feeling it yourself.

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Ami Anne
Moderator

Posts: 57179
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010

posted September 27, 2014 03:05 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Ami Anne     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by teasel:
My fog had lifted, but it's back in a big way. I'm sorry that you've been feeling it yourself.


I can say that I am feeling my way out of it, Teasel. Just describing it helped a lot. When people can relate, that helps too!

I have gotten lovely comments on this and that kind of thing really makes everything worthwhile!


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Want To Ask Any Question About Bible Prophecy? Go For it. It is Free, of course.


http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/

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