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Author
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Topic: Dealbreaker Traits
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PisceanDream
Knowflake Posts: 1286
From: Here
Registered: Jun 2014
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posted November 20, 2014 03:26 PM
  
What personality traits would you be unable to tolerate from a potential or existing partner? What would absolutely kill it for you?I, personally, cannot tolerate headstrong, offensive, and in your face people. I don't like people who initiate and over-engage in this whole *** for tat thing. People who give into their anger or their ego so impulsively and just fight everyone for the hell of it... I need someone peaceful and patient. People who think they're right when 489020934 people are telling them that they're wrong. That kind of stubborn... I'm right you're all wrong, I refuse to see what you mean kinda thing... Nope. Never. I don't see how anyone would tolerate/defend that. I also don't like whiny and naggy people, particularly ones that throw their agency under the bus for the sake of expelling any kind of culpability and accountability. You messed up? Cool. Own it and apologize, don't start disassociating yourself from your own autonomy by blaming others for the way you act. I also dislike people so quick to pour their romantic feelings out. Be patient. Be sure. Then talk to me about it. But don't tell me "I'm the one" and you've known me for 3 weeks LOL bye  What about you guys? IP: Logged |
sweet-scorpion
Moderator Posts: 2357
From: CO, USA
Registered: Apr 2012
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posted November 20, 2014 04:16 PM
Those are all really good points! I especially can't stand people who are really headstrong too. Pride is normal, but too much pride is killer. As you know, I really don't tolerate excessive insecurity well. It draws out MY insecurities and it just creates a weird atmosphere of a confusion and discomfort. I've also never really cared for people who are wishy washy to an excess, either, especially when it comes to how they feel about others and what they are doing with their lives. So basically, I like people who have their heads set firmly on their shoulders! Confidence, not arrogance, is appealing to me. IP: Logged |
aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 10288
From: Uranus
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted November 20, 2014 05:11 PM
I cannot stand women who refuse to openly communicate about things and instead play mind games. Sadly this rules out At least 90% of the women in my generation but I can live with that. IP: Logged |
PisceanDream
Knowflake Posts: 1286
From: Here
Registered: Jun 2014
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posted November 20, 2014 06:30 PM
quote:
Originally posted by sweet-scorpion:
Confidence, not arrogance, is appealing to me.
IP: Logged |
PisceanDream
Knowflake Posts: 1286
From: Here
Registered: Jun 2014
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posted November 20, 2014 06:33 PM
quote:
Originally posted by aquaguy91:
I cannot stand women who refuse to openly communicate about things and instead play mind games.
Agree! quote:
Sadly this rules out At least 90% of the women in my generation but I can live with that.
I don't think that's true. I'm a woman of "your generation" and I don't, in my experience, see this to be the case.
IP: Logged |
Randall
Webmaster Posts: 48041
From: Saturn next to Charmainec
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 01, 2014 09:12 PM
Have to think about it. IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 59062
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted December 01, 2014 09:48 PM
Not loyal LOL------------------
Want To Ask Any Question About Bible Prophecy? Go For it. It is Free, of course.
http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
IP: Logged |
CatMote
Knowflake Posts: 803
From: Fighting Neptune for his trident
Registered: Apr 2013
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posted December 01, 2014 10:19 PM
YOURE THE ONE PISCEAN DREAM MARRRRY MEEEEEEi get ****** when im ignored. yeah, im egocentric, whatever. but i think its more than that. i always put my all into personal relationships and i get upset when i dont get the same in return.
i get peeved when people dont have any personal integrity or pride into their work or what they do. this work represents YOU, you better put it into action! something of a motto for me is that if youre going to fail, fail gloriously. ------------------
"Perhaps there are new plateaus to reach, even greater heights to which I must ascend." IP: Logged |
Padre35
Knowflake Posts: 3889
From: Asheville, NC, US
Registered: Jul 2012
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posted December 01, 2014 10:30 PM
Ugh, being just flat out rude and unfeminine and not being concerned at all about your time.6 hrs of ranting on the phone to Apple over a pos laptop.over two days.was a fascinating sort of hell IP: Logged |
aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 10288
From: Uranus
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted December 02, 2014 12:12 AM
I have been thinking more about this. One thing I can't stand is people who are close minded. I'm a very open minded person and need somebody like me in that sense.IP: Logged |
aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 10288
From: Uranus
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted December 02, 2014 12:27 AM
quote:
Originally posted by PisceanDream:
I don't think that's true. I'm a woman of "your generation" and I don't, in my experience, see this to be the case.
Well you may be different, but my experience tells me most women are cowardly and passive when it comes to communicating. I have also had other guys tell me they have the same experiences. Which is ok, but I can't deal with it given my own problems.IP: Logged |
Padre35
Knowflake Posts: 3889
From: Asheville, NC, US
Registered: Jul 2012
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posted December 02, 2014 12:34 AM
I'm willing to embrace any idea or even behavior, what does bother me is when self righteousness is tossed inIP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 59062
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted December 02, 2014 11:22 AM
Well you may be different, but my experience tells me most women are cowardly and passive when it comes to communicating. I have also had other guys tell me they have the same experiences. Which is ok, but I can't deal with it given my own problems.In my opinion, this perception is the chart. In my chart, I have a very hard time trusting women because I have nemesis conj the Moon as well as a very wide Mars conj Moon( 9 degrees). I really, really, really struggle with a feeling inside that woman cannot be trusted. I expect to be betrayed. When I have female friendships, I feel like I have a wall up. I can't help it. I am just being really real here. With men, I form easy friendships. It flows well. I have Sun trine Neptune. I have Sun sextile Pluto. I have amazing asteroids conj my Sun. It is not our fault, per se, but what we have been given and the lens that results imo ------------------
Want To Ask Any Question About Bible Prophecy? Go For it. It is Free, of course.
http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
IP: Logged |
12muddy
Knowflake Posts: 2119
From:
Registered: Feb 2013
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posted December 02, 2014 03:01 PM
wanting to control, micromanage my life -> biggest deal breaker.lazy, indecisive, sexist, racist, hot n cold, not being open and communicative, easily swayed, having bad personal hygiene, overly jealous, reckless-not caring about their health and safety, showing highly unhealthy interest in physical appearance, luxury goods, money, status, work, power, mind games, arguments...etc... addiction to alcohol, drugs, sex, smokes, gambling. not being able to manage/balance their time, money, relationship, work.... etc... not having basic cooking, cleaning, house-keeping skills... getting depressed, losing heart easily. Not having zest for life. I dont mind being friends or interact with people who have these traits. Dont think much about these stuff at all coz after all people r people, they have traits that gel well with my own and traits that dont. Most often I just accept that it is what it is. But choosing a life partner is s.t else, I live with the person, tie myself to them. So yeah things that dont matter in friendship become important. IP: Logged |
bansheequeen
Knowflake Posts: 771
From: Beachville, USA
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted December 02, 2014 03:14 PM
Too caught up in physical appreance and fashion, his hair etc. I don't like men that primo more than I do or care more than I do about the clothes he wears. I don't know why it's just a huuuge turnoff. I think my mars in taurus makes me prefer more down to earth men.Too self absorbed. Big ego. Kinda ties in with the above. Users. People that manipulate and use others are the worst. And in a man it just reminds me of a catty female. Cares too much about what other people think. Doesn't really hurt anything but it's just really unattractive to me. I actually knew a guy that didn't want to be seen getting out of an ugly car. Wow just wow. Buys into a culture too much. Like popular culture, hip hop, punk, whatever culture. I can't stand people that buy into other peooles ideas and groups. He needs to be his own man. IP: Logged |
Faith
Knowflake Posts: 9371
From:
Registered: Jul 2011
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posted December 02, 2014 03:35 PM
When I was single the biggest dealbreaker was apathy on either side.No spark, no point...over and out. IP: Logged |
Padre35
Knowflake Posts: 3889
From: Asheville, NC, US
Registered: Jul 2012
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posted December 02, 2014 11:43 PM
Odd you would say that AG, when I ask direct questions or make flat statements women I've met will shoot things straight.Another deal breaker incessantly talking about ex's, I can get it was messy, can get it was a part, perhaps a large part, of their lives..each day, every day, just too much. IP: Logged |
hannaramaa
Moderator Posts: 9152
From:
Registered: Nov 2011
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posted December 03, 2014 01:16 AM
*Not making me feel like a woman.*Having a bad sense of timing. "Going with the flow" instead of taking command and being decisive. I hate that. Wtf is up with my generation playing the game of who can care less? Are we really that deep and have 'been through so much' that we have walls up? We're only 20-somethings. Let's get real, here. Speaking to everyone my age who hasn't been through a serious trauma, of course! I can't deal with guys who are "big fish in little pond"ers. They're usually the overly cocky ones but wouldn't bust a grape in a fruit fight, bye Felicia. That's a little boy's game. Someone who isn't intuitive. This must be why I have Neptune in the 7th, Moon trine Neptune, Sun square Neptune, and Mars in the 12th (and for added effect - Pluto in the 5th.) It's natural for me to be attracted to someone spiritual, on some level. Maybe they don't know it but I see it in them. Men who advocate that husbands can't rape their wives because their married. NOPE. Quiet guys. It just heightens all my insecurities and anxieties. IP: Logged |
Odette
Moderator Posts: 4868
From:
Registered: May 2012
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posted December 03, 2014 01:28 AM
- Lack of imagination
- Over-inflated ego
- Expectation that they be able to completely rely on me financially or on an emotional level, as though I'm their parent
- Expectation that I can "heal" all their problems, when I am not Jesus Christ
- Playing games, acting immature
- Sexist views... actually *any* discriminatory views
- Lack of intelligence, inability to hold a conversation with me...Those are the first things that came to mind...
IP: Logged |
charlie
Knowflake Posts: 2676
From: los angeles, ca, USA
Registered: Jun 2012
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posted December 03, 2014 03:50 AM
quote:
Originally posted by hannaramaa:
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"Going with the flow" instead of taking command and being decisive. I hate that
I effin hate that too!! Makes me want to punch a whole in wall. Or person. Speaking of going with the flow: toss 100 people in a rip current and let's see how many just "go with the flow"..It's a sad excuse for being disinterested in my opinion! IP: Logged |
florence
Knowflake Posts: 648
From:
Registered: Jun 2012
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posted December 03, 2014 04:26 AM
What kills it for me & I hate to see in others relationships too is when intimacy is mistaken for a right to interfere inordinately especially when it results in a pestering without understanding or even caring that i/someone doesn't want to do xyz. Possessive and even control is fine if actually I can respect them but I can't respect it when fought for in a petty manner - it's just like putting stress or pressure on the other. I suppose it suggests to me they can't manage their own stress so spill it over.Lack of reflective thought or breadth in thinking. Basically this is the main one that the above comes under but i especially dislike this manifesting in the above manner Double standards, contradictory behaviour, hypocrisy - it gets through my radar in the short term but over time bothers me a lot. More a head than heart issue. IP: Logged |
Faith
Knowflake Posts: 9371
From:
Registered: Jul 2011
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posted December 03, 2014 10:39 AM
quote:
Originally posted by florence:
What kills it for me & I hate to see in others relationships too is when intimacy is mistaken for a right to interfere inordinately especially when it results in a pestering without understanding or even caring that i/someone doesn't want to do xyz.
 Reminds me of this quote....which I'm posting since Padre loves quotes sooo much. (Just kidding, he loathes them.) Still, this is the point, embellished with a pretty photo:  ^ Fits my Sag Venus nicely. IP: Logged |
Padre35
Knowflake Posts: 3889
From: Asheville, NC, US
Registered: Jul 2012
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posted December 03, 2014 08:15 PM
quote:
Originally posted by charlie:
I effin hate that too!! Makes me want to punch a whole in wall. Or person. Speaking of going with the flow: toss 100 people in a rip current and let's see how many just "go with the flow"..It's a sad excuse for being disinterested in my opinion!
Actually the best way to escape a rip current is to keep your head above water and let it carry you until it runs out of force. IP: Logged |
aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 10288
From: Uranus
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted December 03, 2014 08:38 PM
quote:
Originally posted by hannaramaa:
Wtf is up with my generation playing the game of who can care less? Are we really that deep and have 'been through so much' that we have walls up? We're only 20-somethings. Let's get real, here. Speaking to everyone my age who hasn't been through a serious trauma, of course!
.
Yes.
IP: Logged |
florence
Knowflake Posts: 648
From:
Registered: Jun 2012
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posted December 04, 2014 04:36 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Faith:
Reminds me of this quote....which I'm posting since Padre loves quotes sooo much. (Just kidding, he loathes them.) Still, this is the point, embellished with a pretty photo: ^ Fits my Sag Venus nicely.
So maybe is my sag moon. I'm taurean possessive and want to merge (neptune conjunction) but just in a romantic way, not like in an administrative way  do you have some nuance like that between earth sun, pisces moon? If I got your aspects right IP: Logged |
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