posted September 24, 2015 09:15 AM            

However, I am also wondering if one's soul always align with the particular religion they were brought up in.

For instance, I was brought up in a specific religion and I was very devoted up until I turned 18. When I turned 18, I moved out of my parents house and my values have radically changed. I remember that when I was 7, I once told my parents: "Why do we have to do everything according to religion? Why can't we just be? It's not me".

Growing up, I sort of felt slightly awkward because I was following a certain path that my parents had taught me to follow but me inner self felt inadequate.

Fast forward, I have been "spiritual" since I was 18 which made me feel a lot better. I notice that whenever I shifted back to my parents religious beliefs to abide by the "rules", my life would lose balance yet again . For instance, one summer I was very devoted and I ended up getting sick and repeating my college semester almost right away.

Whenever I'd just be "me", I would feel extremely happy and content.

Yesterday, I had a car ride with someone who first asked me if I was a believer of a certain religion. I hesitated and said "yes" for the sake of it because I knew he was and it's also the religion I was brought up in. Then he proceeded to put some religious tape that kept saying that non-believers will be punished in hell and the lost souls who were once believers but decided to trust the "devil" instead will never be granted God's forgiveness. The tape lasted the whole car ride (two hours).

That was before a job interview I had. Then that day was hell. After hearing that tape, I became insanely agitated. I gathered I had lost my inner "balance". Then, I didn't get the job, I cut my finger rather deeply and my phone broke down completely. I've been extremely agitated since I heard that tape and I feel as though I've lost my inner peace.

My mom has also been telling me I'm a sinner and God is punishing me for my sins. My extremely religious brother thinks the same and I'm stuck all alone.

The moment I heard that tape, things started going south. The past few weeks were quite rough on me to begin with, but I feel as though I had a certain luck when I had inner peace.

posted September 24, 2015 11:44 AM            

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posted September 24, 2015 02:52 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by mercuranian:
i understand. my soul does not align with the religion i was brought up in. i've also noticed that "spiritual" people are usually happier than "religious" people.

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It is what I was talking about. If you "soul" does not align with a certain religion, don't you feel miserable or agitated when someone is trying to force it on you? You just feel tense even if it is the one you were brought up in.

posted September 24, 2015 03:19 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by MineAgain:
It is what I was talking about. If you "soul" does not align with a certain religion, don't you feel miserable or agitated when someone is trying to force it on you? You just feel tense even if it is the one you were brought up in.

I know you should feel at peace with the higher power, but certain beliefs which do not align with your true self may make you feel inadequate and therefore make you unhappy.

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posted September 24, 2015 03:25 PM            

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posted September 24, 2015 03:41 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by mercuranian:
i understand. my soul does not align with the religion i was brought up in. i've also noticed that "spiritual" people are usually happier than "religious" people.

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I think it's a bit too broad/sweeping to say that "spiritual" people are happier than "religious" people. The whole thing is a bit blurry to really define things. Ideally, spirituality and religion should be one. If someone is deeply and genuinely into their faith/religion, is it wrong to say they are spiritual as well? Or perhaps someone does not necessarily relate to a traditional belief, they would like their "spirituality" to be as valid as someone else's "religion", no?

Truthfully, people are complex and you don't really know if someone is "happy" or "unhappy", despite the outward projection. Happiness can be a fluid thing, that changes from day to day or even hour to hour.

I suspect the thing you are observing about "spiritual" people being happier than "religious" people could be a very surface thing. For example, they don't have to follow rules, go to church, or memorize prayers - I bet they're glad about that, right?! How deep or shallow is this happiness? Are there people who don't identify with a traditional religion and are truly happy? Of course there are! But I've also seen truly happy people who are also sincerely religious.

posted September 24, 2015 03:54 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by CosmiqPhuz:
I suspect that it's not because of the religion, but because of inner tension and nerves resulting from the harsh interactions with your family, the guy in the car, etc.

I think it's a bit too broad/sweeping to say that "spiritual" people are happier than "religious" people. The whole thing is a bit blurry to really define things. Ideally, spirituality and religion should be one. If someone is deeply and genuinely into their faith/religion, is it wrong to say they are spiritual as well? Or perhaps someone does not necessarily relate to a traditional belief, they would like their "spirituality" to be as valid as someone else's "religion", no?

Truthfully, people are complex and you don't really know if someone is "happy" or "unhappy", despite the outward projection. Happiness can be a fluid thing, that changes from day to day or even hour to hour.

I suspect the thing you are observing about "spiritual" people being happier than "religious" people could be a very surface thing. For example, they don't have to follow rules, go to church, or memorize prayers - I bet they're glad about that, right?! How deep or shallow is this happiness? Are there people who don't identify with a traditional religion and are truly happy? Of course there! But I've also seen truly happy people who are also sincerely religious.

Belief can be a very blurry thing, because a lot of times it's directed mostly inwards. People's actions often contradict their beliefs. And people have different motives. Some want to be truly good people, others just want to get to heaven. I don't care if you believe in God or Allah, or talking trees, but if you treat others like sh*t, what's the point?

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To be honest, I've always felt inadequate with the religion I was brought up in. It's got nothing to do with recent events. They certainly accentuated the feeling but they did not trigger it. These events are not highly relevant in such context. I'm really trying to dissociate how I feel about my parents from how I feel about religion because these are two different aspects.

I however agree that my nerves are indeed intensified by the circumstances but also because religion is on TV 24/7 at home.

When I was about 5, I knew my parents would never celebrate Christmas yet I begged to get a Christmas tree until I got it. Then, as I was growing up, I was far more interested in reading about other religions than about my own. I've always felt inadequate even when I didn't know much about what religion meant. As I said, even at 7, I wasn't feeling comfortable with it and no 7 year old knows how to take a step back from their family traditions. As a kid, I hated anything that related anything to my parents tradition when all of my siblings seem to be pretty content.

This inadequacy is something I've always felt, it's not something new. However, the recent events have pushed me to look deeper into this feeling of inadequacy but they certainly did not trigger it.

posted September 24, 2015 04:08 PM            

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posted September 24, 2015 05:13 PM            

To others, they didn't realize what they believed in or needed to follow until they were in a dire situation. Life-or-death, rock bottom, hopeless situations. At that point, it's not a choice, but an absolute desperate need. When my mom was stranded in the ocean in a fishing boat, no food or water, and some of her cousins died from sickness and pushed overboard, she cried out to God.

I grew up in a home with 2 religions - my mom's Catholic and my dad's Buddhist. We participated in both practices and there was never one argument or fight over religion in our house. I still take part in a Buddhist ceremony with my dad's side of the family every year. I attended Catholic school for 1st and 2nd grade - parents stopped sending me cause it was so expensive. My mom sent me to Sunday school until I had my confirmation at 14. The key to the harmony in our house was the awareness of the big picture. We never watched religious things on TV, though.

My grandpa once told me: "You are defined by your actions, not by what you think or believe." That may explain my casual attitude towards religion.