posted November 07, 2018 10:24 AM            

I have been married for 4 yrs almost exactly on the date. When I met my husband (we will call him "S") I will admit that he "sold me" a picture of him that I now know not to be true. Or it might be true, just not something that he chooses to show.
He sold me a picture of him being kind (he is when he wants to be), curteous (he is when he wants something from you), understanding of all the different nuances that it entails being a human; being freightened, angry, sad etc etc

Anyway, S was kind, loving, content and caring for about 1 year. During this time, I had little knowledge about his past and that included his ex-wife. He never told me what a controling psycho she is and how she manipulates everyone so that she can get money. He never told me about all the years he used drugs or all the people he used to hang out with, doing drugs. He never told me about all the people he used to do "business" with. People that later popped up out of nowhere and literally scared me to death all the while he kept saying that I should keep calm and stop being silly.

The more I kept finding out about his past, the angrier he has become. Nowadays he is downright vile. He calls me the C-word almost on a daily basis. He flips me off. Yells at me in front of complete strangers. Humiliates me infront of his daughter. Threatens divorce only to later say he was joking.
It also doesn't help that I CALMLY tell him that it makes me sad because that makes him angrier.

Things have been OK-ish for most of 2018. We are currently in the middle of signing a contract on a new business and it's been going really well, bar a few sidesteps in terms of contract signing and then BOOM!

Apparently, his past has come to knock on the door again. The seller (we had never met him because deal is being brokered) is an "old friend" of S. They used to drugs 20 years ago while seller beat the **** out of his police-girlfriend. S has stopped drugs since way back, but not the seller whom appears to have taken drug use to a whole other level...

Seller showed up at work today, yelling and screaming. High as a kite. I was literally so scared I was sweating through my tshirt while hiding out in office. Seller wanted to shake my hand but I didn't want to because I was SCARED OF HIM!! When he left, S told me he didn't want to be my business partner (one of MANY (!!) threats he has used on me) because I couldn't behave properly. I tried telling him that I was scared but he didn't care.

posted November 08, 2018 05:45 PM            

Let them give you some advice. Assess your situation.

uh, WHY are you signing contracts with him and his buddy .. I'm not a lawyer, but, if they start doing something wrong, couldn't you be liable?

If you have the finances, have his buddy (the one you are contracting with) investigated. Background check, criminal check. Do it secretly … if you can, for now. Do you have (your own) lawyer who could do that for you?

His change of behavior is **RED FLAG**?

Go consult with DV .. You've got "addicts"!!
Protect yourself.

If you feel it's right, do something to stall the business deal, if you need counsel with this. Don't want you getting screwed!

posted November 08, 2018 08:21 PM            

you dont quit hard drugs and keep associating with the people you used with unless there's **** still going on

because you cant get away from drugs without stepping away from all of it and that includes the people you used with unless they clean up with you

posted November 09, 2018 10:39 AM            

I just feel that there is nothing we can do to start FRESH because his past is ALWAYS coming back sooner or later and I am freakin sick and tired of the sh1t!

Like other poor women, I am sitting here making delusional excuses as to way he is behaving like a **** :-/ It's pathetic, really.

posted January 14, 2019 08:23 PM            

This, along with some of your other posts really makes me wonder... Why are you still with him?

Pardon me if that's rude, but it's not sarcastic - a genuine question. Is there any reason you can't get out or do you just love him or...

posted January 15, 2019 06:40 PM            

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