posted July 18, 2002 01:39 AM         

This is probably not the right forum for my post but I didn't really know where to put it, so I'm sorry. I figured the "healing" part of the forum was appropriate for my post, but maybe not....oh well.

Anyway, here's my problem: I have absolutely no idea *why*, but for some reason I've been somewhat dishonest lately. I am truly a very very honest person, and I don't know what's come over me! I'm not exactly lying I guess, but I'm sort of exaggerating things to make myself look better. It's awful. I don't know why I'm doing it. It's nothing like me! Afterward I feel horrible, like I'm the scum of the earth, but a few days later I'll do it again! I don't feel like myself at all! I never do this. It's not like full blown lying, though.....it's more like I'll exaggerate something to make myself look better. I think I'm doing it out of insecurity. I don't know. Please give me some advice to help me stop doing this!

The "lies" that I'm talking about about aren't really things that hurt other people; if anything, it hurts me! Like for example....I've started a small soap business and my friend asked me how much money I made at my last show. I told her I made like thirty bucks more than I actually made! It's like I boosted up the number just to make myself feel better. How pathetic is that? I don't know why I'm doing things like this lately.... I guess my confidence has gone down the drain, and so I feel like I need to make myself look better to other people.

Maybe it is something astrological. I have no idea. Anyway, I would appreciate hearing what you all think.

posted July 18, 2002 10:51 AM         

I too have ususally been a very honest person. About two or three months back, however, I started lying a little to protect mys-elf. Nothing major ... just small cover-ups. For example, I had promised my Other that I would not stay in office beyond 9:00 pm on any day (since it takes me a long time to reach home). However, I didn't keep the promise, and used to leave a few minutes late (but late, nevertheless). I hid this from her, because I felt she would be disappointed if she were to find out.

And, I also told some little lies to my boss when I was a late (not much) to work sometimes. I used to tell her I was well in the morning ...

Telling these lies felt quite bad initially, but slowly I became a *little* numb to it. I was not happy with the situation, but was unwilling to risk speaking the truth, and face criticism.

posted July 18, 2002 10:51 AM         

I have told mys-elf that this Peace I experience when I speak the truth is more important than the small amount of respect others may lose for me, if I told them of my slip-ups. Moreover, facing my shortcomings honestly gives me the stregth to do something about them. This is a paradox ~ as long as I was hiding my faults, I had no strength to change them. Now that I admit them, I feel strong enough to rise above them.

I would Love to hear other knowflakes experiences and onions about this issue.

posted July 19, 2002 02:20 AM         

It is one thing to lie to save face, and quite another to wish our life was different. When we *ordain* something, we do state something which is not a truth yet, but which we expect to manifest soon.

Our words carry a lot of power. Whatever we say has the potential of coming true. The further one has progressed on the spiritual path, the more potent one's words are. Jesus once healed a person simply by saying, "By your own faith in God, you are healed."

Now, had Jesus thought of this as lying, he would have said, "Well, you are in a bad shape right now, but you'll get better soon." And that would have kept that person unwell, since Jesus said that in the *present*, the person was _not_well_.

So, how do we resolve the dilemma? When should we speak the truth, and when should we ordain?

posted July 19, 2002 02:22 AM         

For example, if I was not well, and someone asked about my health, I could say, "Oh, I am fine. But I could be better, I guess." This way, I would have spoken the truth, as well as ordained something better (by saying "I am fine").

I have been trying this for four years now, and it is very "interesting". Initially, you might stumble a few times, but slowly you'll get the hang of it. You'll find yours-elf thinking carefully about the words you choose, before anything you speak! The habit grows on you. And I really do believe it works. The more often we repeat something positive, the faster it comes true.

And yes, when you catch yours-elf saying something negative (i.e., ordaining something undesirable), just CANCEL!

All the best!

posted July 19, 2002 08:18 AM         

GLLF, don't be so hard on your S-elf.

posted July 20, 2002 05:20 PM         

I haven't been doing it since I posted. If I ever feel tempted to *embellish* my stories (the PERFECT word for what I do!), I stop and find a way to change topics so I'm never tempted.

I recently saw some relatives, and, (because I've been sick for a while) they always ask me if my health is improving. I always say "of course it is!" even though it isn't, and then, to top it off, I make up some elaborate reason why I'm feeling soooo much better, even though I'm not. I guess I like to tell people what they want to hear. I just need to keep my embellishing to a minimum.

posted July 20, 2002 09:43 PM         

In Linda Goodman's Star Signs, Linda wrote about something called the Electromagnetic Field. Usually, when you meet someone with a very strong and capable physical presence, they are manipulating the electromagnetic field to their advantage, whether they are aware of it or not.

When you want your stance to be known and your voice to be heard, you stand with your back facing north. (All directions indicated are attainable with a compass.) If you want to relax, hang loose and not have too much of a presence, you stand with your back facing south. Even though Linda Goodman never wrote this, I took it to mean that standing with your back facing east or west creates a neutral presence, where both people are on common ground.