posted October 14, 2002 12:29 PM         

anyway, a few months ago, they stopped the chemo because it was aggravating her rhematoid arthiritis..she has that severe...

she had a ct scan the other day and found out that she is in the same place as she was a year ago, and they are starting chemo again..this time though it must be some aggressive therapy as she was told she will loose all her hair...

does anyone just have some positive thoughts? i normally am very positive about these kinds of things, but you know what? i'm beat down, i'm run down...i'm exhausted from worry and depression..i'm severely (in my eyes--the doctors won't give me any meds to help me, so they must not think i'm obese but in my eyes, i am badly overweight)...at any rate, my stepfather has been fighting lung cancer, he was diagnosed last year at this time too...was given 3 months, and received massive amounts of chemo and radiation...

on top of that, my oldest daughter is 12 and very hormonal and smart mouth and just a teenager, but drives me nuts...and my marriage, i'm piecing back together after i thought i'd lose my mind back in July...i still might before this is all over with...

and i just don't have anything positive in my body at this very moment...

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When I despair, I remember that all through history the way of truth and love has always won. There have been tyrants, and murderers, and for a time they can seem invincible, but in the end they always fall, always.

- Mahatma Gandhi

posted October 18, 2002 03:24 AM         

Lots of light to you

I've lost family, including my father, to cancer. I know it's hard. Just try to breathe and calm yourself and your surroundings the best you can (go through the motions even if you don't feel like it- showers and candles help). It sounds like there are alot of difficult issues merging in your life all at the same time. Just try to stay steady and centered. It is important for you to stay serene and positive so that you can be a healthy example for others around you. Also, try to realize that although you can have compassion for and want to help others around you, sometimes there are things that are beyond your control and it is probably best to let go if it is causing you depression. Having compassion and helping others should never make you feel depressed, if it does, it is a subtle warning sign that you are taking on too much of other's responsibilities (which doesn't help them anyway). I don't know if this relates, just wanted to share it.

I will send your daughter light as well.
Have you thought of ways to relate to her better? Does she ever read the boards here at LL?

Well, take care, and love to you...

Pearly

posted October 18, 2002 09:09 AM         

As far at that white light and angels around me...I do feel that La Tee Da, thank you for reminding me of it, for sometimes the darkness of depression will blind me from it. This board and several people here are becoming very special to me, because I feel the goodness...and that in turn makes me feel good in general.

Thank you Hopeful for the link...I scanned it briefly, but will most certainly read it more closely as time allows.. I have 2 kids and I work! Time is precious.

With that said, I have developed a plan for cleansing beginning this weekend that will carry through next week. At the end of the week, I shall evaluate the situation and go from there...more on that later..

THANKS AGAIN TO EVERYONE!

*HUGS*

------------------
When I despair, I remember that all through history the way of truth and love has always won. There have been tyrants, and murderers, and for a time they can seem invincible, but in the end they always fall, always.

- Mahatma Gandhi

posted October 24, 2002 10:28 AM         

they found out last fall at the same time about their cancers, although his was much more grave and they only gave him 3 months to live...that was on Sept 29th, 2001....and happily he is still with us!! But he has not been cured, only in remission..which is still a good thing...at this point anyway...so...these are good resources for them both...

I guess I was more upset about mom the other day, since her chemo is starting again, and he is not having it right now...its been a very tough year...

------------------
When I despair, I remember that all through history the way of truth and love has always won. There have been tyrants, and murderers, and for a time they can seem invincible, but in the end they always fall, always.

- Mahatma Gandhi

posted November 12, 2002 12:59 PM         

I send LOVE LIGHT AND HEALING!
To you and your mother.

posted December 25, 2002 03:00 AM         

Curing cancer is mostly a prevention thing. You can prevent it by living a correct life, with purity of mind, body, and spirit, avoiding the chemicals that cause it (now everpresent in modern life) and eating healthy food. But once you have cancer, its sayonara sister. The body splits apart by the seams like a pinata of toxins and develops cancer when all hope is lost. Then you wander around, looking for some miracle recovery that never seems to come, and then die really fast and decompose. I could tell you all kinds of practical advice on how to avoid cancer, but who is going to follow it? Most people would just call me an idiot, dismiss me, and go about their life. Since then, I gave up bothering to really share much in-depth. I will say diseased people are toxic sponges, having absorbed as much industrial waste as their cells can take, they finally just shut down. If allowed years (10 to 20 years) to detox, their bodies emit all kinds of gross substances, sickly fluids, mucus, and develop all spectrum of diseases on the way to health.

Sure, the hope for that miracle is there, that light body mastery, that promise of alien and divine intervention. If you want that, make yourself worthy of it. Become a saint, help others, and lose yourself. If you keep being selfish and expecting this and that, forget about any miracle. Some people literally sit around waiting for a miracle to sweep them off their feet. Not going to happen. Certainly never worked for me.

posted December 28, 2002 10:57 PM         

for it just sounds like you need it...