posted February 18, 2005 11:00 PM         

Basically this article is about a website (www.bluedragonfly.org) which was started by a girl suffering from an eating disorder and this poor girl is so mentally sick from her disorder that she is actually giving people tips on how to continue and hide their disorder.

This really made me cry, I also suffer from an eating disorder, however not anorexia or bulimia...I suffer from overeating. I am 275 pounds and I know how it feels to wish desperatly to be thin. Especially since I frequent a UK chatroom and there are sometimes are people in there who will say "Americans are Fat" and it will start out a whole debate about Americans and fatness and some of the Americans (yanks as we are called, lol) will shout out "well Im not fat, Im thin and beautiful" and I feel very ashamed that I am one of the "fat americans" that they are reffering to I also cant stand how some people think they are helping me and other fat people when they say mean things about our weight. They dont understand that things like that make us want to eat more. My fiances brother said to him right in front of me "Maybe if you critisized her more she'd stop being fat and lose weight , you should go back to your ex Suzie, she lost weight and looks good now" I just wanted to die.

posted February 19, 2005 05:04 AM         

This is just such a sad topic...so painful. I really feel for you. It's a tragedy that people put such an enormous emphasis on thinness. Yes, it is important to be in a "normal" weight range for health reasons. But people can be so cruel, even kids can be cruel to those who are heavy. And even if nothing is said to your face, it just seems like you receive a "pointed lack of attention," from others. Many people don't see the real you. It's like being overweight is considered a major character flaw. It's really terrible. I know because I've been there. It caused me an incredible amount of pain and frustration. I really feel for you, and I'm just so sorry that people can be so thoughtless and hurtful.

posted February 19, 2005 10:16 AM         

I think that this is a great idea and, your extension of a helping hand to others, shows your true soul. This topic has always been one of my ' issues', as my husband calls them. My mother was, very, self depreciating and I could not understand why. Throughout my school years, I was around this either, through friends or my family. My best friend's sister was when the inability to understand the disrespect shown, turned to frustration. My friend and I were about 16, her sister, at 11, was not always a welcome tag along but, she was left in Big Sister's charge, much of the time. Needless to say, with 5 years between them, they saw moments of agreement, very rarely! During one of their arguments one evening, the older sis becomes quite frustrated when the younger rolls her eyes at her but, upon voicing her feelings about it, the younger, adamitly, denies the action.....
Within a week, the 11 year old had been diagnosed with epilepsy and, daily steroids were perscribed. Kids are terribly cruel and, she was always being ripped apart. Unfortunately, the intolerance to being over weight and, really just being, ' flawed ', is not only fed to us in everything in the media but, parents, sometimes unintentionally, reinforce it. I have had my own experience with weight, through the birth of my kiddos. It only reinforced my appreciation of the body that I had been, somewhat, unaware of through life.
I agree with the comments made about the current clothing trends... I have a 6 year old daughter and, she is absolutely beatiful, even when she has almost every inch of her skin COVERED!! I was, totally, blown away a few months ago, when upon picking my lovely innocents up from school, my 8 year old SON, turns to me and says, " Mom,.... I think I might be getting fat."

Oh miss_apples, do remember, the judgements of others, only shows their own weakness'!
~When everyone else, first of all, finds a common, ' perfect' and, then attains it... then is when I, might, care~ This is how I deal with those who are consumed by trivial fears, they drown in their own shallow waters until they find help in themselves.....

LovinHugs to you miss.

posted February 19, 2005 10:34 AM         

quote:

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Yes, it is important to be in a "normal" weight range for health reasons.

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Despite the currently fashionable media stance, there is some research to refute this claim.

Thin people do not have a lock on health. Thin people die of heart attacks, diabetes, etc., too. I see many thin people eating horrible diets. And people who are thin following Atkins type programs have put their health in jeopardy.

Many people who fit into the 'overweight' category are very healthy, with excellent blood pressure, stamina, etc.

Miss Apples, don't allow someone else determine your self-worth. That's the sad issue. Tell your future brother-in-law to f*ck off and take some lessons in manners. And I would question the committment of a fiance who allowed his brother to speak to you in such a way.

posted February 19, 2005 05:00 PM         

I don't think I have ever met a health professional who would agree that that is so. This includes both conventional and holistic medicine.

If you are overweight, you are more likely to suffer from heart disease, diabetes, stroke, certain types of cancer (such as breast, ovarian, colon and more), sleep apnea, gout, osteoarthritis, gallbladder disease, and other health problems.

While being at an ideal weight doesn't *guarantee* better health, it does improve your odds.

I don't mean to be insensitive by saying any of this, and I don't want to make anyone feel bad. Weight is such a battle for so many people, myself included. I wish there were a better solution for everybody. It can be really hard trying to maintain a healthy weight in this country.

posted February 19, 2005 05:07 PM         

I am also very healthy. Ive had many tests done and I have normal blood sugar and normal, almost low blood pressure. But I can tell that I dont have as much energy as I did when I was skinny before I had my babies.

Also I am not as hard on myself as a lot of other overweight people are. I actually do think Im beautiful and I like my body except for my flabby arms...lol. Im not ashamed to wear a swimsuit in public and I dont hide behind baggy clothes. Just every once in awhile I get down on myself when I talk to certain people or see certain types of media. And I get terribly jealous when any of my friends lose weight, although happy for them at the same time.

Todays society really does put too much focus on physical things such as the way a person looks, money, and objects. And if you dont have those things you are considered "flawed" as someone mentioned. And they really think that insulting and taunting will get you motivated. I watch that show "celebrity fit club" and I am disgusted how that physical trainer guy uses insults at Mia Tyler and the others thinking he is actually doing them a favor by being mean. I think things like that just drive most people to either eat more, turn to anorexia or bulimia, or to physical hurt themselves and others in other ways.

posted February 19, 2005 06:24 PM         

I'm quite skinny (but not fit) and I've worn very baggy clothes for the longest time - since puberty, actually.
I started developing well before and faster most everyone else (and have stretch marks on my breasts and hips to show for it)...and developed more than many. This made later elementary through middle school quite uncomfortable, and as a defense mechanism I just hid what there was to see.

*takes pop psy hat off*

Ah, body image.

posted February 22, 2005 03:26 PM         

I'm sure when you get your drivers liscense and start accomplishing more outside the house, you'll begin to feel better and more in control of your life. I'm sure thats really hard not being able to drive, it would give you like a sense of not being productive. Oh yea and when one area of my life starts getting better, it always spreads to other areas. So I'm sure getting your liscense will have a positive effect on your confidence or feeling of accomplishment.