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Author Topic:   Brother is falling off the wagon
BlueRoamer
Knowflake

Posts: 942
From: Calm Blue Ocean, Calm Blue Ocean
Registered: Jun 2003

posted August 01, 2005 05:48 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for BlueRoamer     Edit/Delete Message
He's been a recovering alcoholic for about a year, but it seems that hes starting to fall off the wagon. He's having delusional episodes, he stopped going to his classes, and my dad might stop paying his rent...I think he must be drinking again...any advice anyone? Hes 26, scorpio with aries moon....I'm afraid hes giong to end up homeless and die

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DayDreamer
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Posts: 1283
From:
Registered: Jul 2003

posted August 01, 2005 09:05 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for DayDreamer     Edit/Delete Message
Hmm maybe he shouldnt be living on his own as he tries to recover from alcoholism. I don't know how any one could recover from an addiction on their own. I hope he gets past his dependence on it.

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Philbird
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Posts: 2918
From: Here, there and everywhere.
Registered: Jun 2004

posted August 01, 2005 09:14 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Philbird     Edit/Delete Message
Supposedly, the lemonade/cayenne/maplesyrup mixture mentioned in the master cleanse a couple of times a day helps with the cravings. (so I hear)

2tbs. fresh squeezed lemon juice
2tbs. maple syrup, grade B (must be grade B) You can find this at health food stores.
1/8th a teaspooon of cayenne pepper
about 10oz. of water.

The whole cleanse is supposed to remove the cravings all together.

Do a search for "The Master Cleanse."
Here's a start.

the Master Cleanser was developed @ 50 years ago by a guy named Stanley Burroughs. i first came across the fast in an article i read in college, but i didn't try it until i moved to California after graduation. the first time we did it was when my husband quit smoking. he thinks it really helped him to stick to his guns with quitting.

if you google "Master Cleanser" you'll come up with lots of info - folks who've done it, and folks who are trying to sell other cleansing products. i've never taken any of the herbal or bentonite cleansers - just the juice - so i can't comment on those.

i would suggest picking up the little book by Burroughs if you're going to try the clease - just to have some background info. it's short - and cheap. and from what i remember there are some interesting photos.

here's the basic recipe:

2 tbs. fresh lemon juice (organic if possible)
2 tbs. grade B maple syrup (not grade A - too refined and less mineral content)
1/8 tsp. cayenne pepper - or to taste
10-12 oz. fresh water

i think the water is supposed to be warm, but i prefer mine cold - i say go with whatever makes it go down easiest!

as i mentioned in the other string, you'll also need to take a laxative tea to keep the bowels moving. i've used two different brands that contain senna extract. there is often some cramping, but that didn't bother me so much - as long as it worked. which it does. drink it each night before bed, and then in the morning it's goodbye toxins! i've used Traditional Medicinals "Smooth Move" and Yogi Tea "Get Regular." i think i prefer the former, but they both work.

ummm, what else. ahhh, the salt water flush. this is actually my favorite part, thought the mixture makes me gag a bit. it's 2 tsp (teaspoons!) of sea salt (not the iodized kind) in a quart of water. the water must be warm - it's supposed to have the same density and temperature as blood. this, i assume, aids in the direction in which it leaves.

drink the whole thing down as quickly as possible - much harder than it sounds.

here's the funny part. this ocean will run through you in about a half hour (when we do the cleanse together we have to stagger our salt water flushes!) - word of warning - even after you've eliminated a few times, be careful of the desire to pass gas. get yourself to the bathroom - it's not just air in there anymore! everyone i know who's done this fast always mentions this!

oh, and it's advisable to eat raw foods only or even a broth/juice fast for a couple days beforehand, just to clear out the major debris. then the lemon and cayenne can really do their job.

the first two days are always tough. some tiredness, crankiness, headaches and a lovely white film forms on the tongue. this is the body starting to detox. drink more lemonade! by the third day it's all feeling worthwhile and - for me - it's wonderful to feel so light - not just physically but emotionally and mentally as well. the fourth day can be lower again, and then it just gets easier.

it's importnat to come off the fast gently. Burroughs recommends fresh orange juice the first two days, then some fresh broth and applesauce. this is how we did it and it worked great.

i think more than anything i gained a greater awareness of what i take into my body and also an appreciation of how central a role food plays in our lives. it's almost impossible to do anything social while on the cleanse. so make sure you work that into your schedule. on the other hand, work was no problem. i just took my supplies with me, and it's a great topic of conversation! my husband was doing carpentry at the time and he did it while working, too - no problem.

when he did the cleanse the first time, he had a lot of REALLY horrible gas and he expected (as in *cough cough*) a lot of gross-looking brown phlegm balls. we now think this was the smoking detox, because it only happened the first time, and it didn't happen to me. he's also a meat eater and i'm not, so that could have had an effect on the gas, too. please don't be scared away by this!!! it's a good thing, really!

i think for relatively healthy individuals this is a really good way to purge the body of toxic overload. but anyone who has any medical issues - from cancer to diabetes to mental imbalance - definitely do not attempt to fast without proper physician supervision. it could be too much too quickly for the body to take. i also don't know what the deal is with those on medication - if the flush will change the efficacy or not. so please be careful, anyone who has any questions about whether or not this is right for them.

that said, i know many people now who've done this (it's pretty popular in SoCal) - and i haven't heard any adverse effects other than the usual symptoms i listed above. it's just amazing to see how much waste even healthy people carry around with them! the folks who've actually been able to follow through with it rave about the positive effects.


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Bluemoon
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Posts: 1673
From: Stafford, VA USA
Registered: Feb 2005

posted August 01, 2005 10:20 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Bluemoon     Edit/Delete Message
I feel for you, BlueRoamer. My family is full of Alchohalics. Most never even bothered to try to jump on the wagon, much less fall off of it. Have you do an intervention?? All of the people he loves telling him how his problem affect the whole family and his friends and his work and himself.

White light to him!

Love to you and yours, Friendroamer

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LibraSparkle
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Posts: 4939
From: Vancouver USA
Registered: May 2004

posted August 01, 2005 11:58 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for LibraSparkle     Edit/Delete Message
I also have alcoholics scattered all over my family.

You, and your brother will be in my thoughts and prayers.

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BlueRoamer
Knowflake

Posts: 942
From: Calm Blue Ocean, Calm Blue Ocean
Registered: Jun 2003

posted August 02, 2005 12:08 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for BlueRoamer     Edit/Delete Message
Thank so much for the practical advice and for the emotional support. I'm so angry at him right now that I don't even want to call him. The stress it puts on my mother, whos such a wonderful person, just disgusts me.

The problem is hes a non functioning alcoholic, hes never had a job, never really went to college, and sleeps all day long. Sometimes I think he dones't really want to be alive. Hes also dones't like being around other people, he has panic disorder and hes mostly agoraphobic. I wish he could join a recovery house but I don't know if he could handle it.

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Bluemoon
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Posts: 1673
From: Stafford, VA USA
Registered: Feb 2005

posted August 02, 2005 08:04 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Bluemoon     Edit/Delete Message
Love and strength to you family in this difficult time, Roamer.

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thirteen
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Posts: 392
From: Rochester Hills, MI USA
Registered: May 2004

posted August 02, 2005 09:02 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for thirteen     Edit/Delete Message
I have two brothers with drinking problems. I don't have any answers just a lot of frustrations. Pray for him a lot. Does he take anything for the panic disorder? I send you and your family lots of white light for healing and emotional strength.

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26taurus
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Posts: 8542
From: the stars
Registered: Jun 2004

posted August 02, 2005 12:17 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for 26taurus     Edit/Delete Message
BlueRoamer,
Your post brings tears to my eyes and my heart goes out to you and your brother. I really do know how it is. Love and Light to you and he.

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sue g
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Posts: 1584
From: ireland
Registered: Sep 2004

posted August 02, 2005 01:06 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for sue g     Edit/Delete Message
Hi Blue Roamer,

I am very sorry to read about your brother, it must be very hard for you and your family.

A few years ago my husbands brother went thro a very difficult time - he was just 21 and was drinking and smoking a lot of dope and completely lost it (he thought he was Jesus). The doctors diagnosed him as having cannabis induced scizophrenia. His ma and da wouldnt have him in the house and he had nowhere to go after coming out of the psychiatric, so guess where he ended up - yes with my man and me!!

OMG that was one of the most scariest and stressful times of my life and NEVER AGAIN!!!

I got it into my head that I could help him (I was about to train as a healer at the time). I didnt protect myself too well and got very hooked into his illness so did my hubbie, being his brother he wanted to help him. He did this weird stuff to me, like coming into my dreams and tapping into me,it was very scary. He almost split my man and me up!!

Well I took him to see a social worker and he advised that we should get him away into his own flat. Funnily enough, he isnt fully well, but has been living on his own for over 10 years and seems to cope very well. I bent over backwards to try and help him - I became like a surrogate mum for him and in the end he turned on his brother and me!!!

So what is the lesson in there - I think SOMETIMES people with addictions have got to want to be helped - the person doing the helping can go under herself/himself. I know I nearly did. This guy was far more than an alcoholic, he did go thro a form of madness and I really thought I could help him................maybe I did, maybe I didnt.

As for your bro, I think all you can do is recommend help for him - Scorpio people usually respond well to healing - would he go for hands on,like reiki?

I really feel for you and your Mum, its almost like an impossible situation and we SO wanna help, but the very sad thing is, a times all we can do is offer our love and then stand back.

I will pray for your Scorpio brother, I would love to send him some healing. I too suffered panic attacks years ago. I have now reached a much calmer place - it has come with faith and age. What age is he BR? I get the feeling that a lot of Plutonians only get calmer as they mature - maybe your bro needs to go thro this very dark passage before the light floods in for him.

I am getting a shiver down my back as I write this. If he is open, just ask him to let in the light, and I will send some from Ireland - God bless all of you

Love and healing

Sue xxx

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Philbird
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Posts: 2918
From: Here, there and everywhere.
Registered: Jun 2004

posted August 02, 2005 01:17 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Philbird     Edit/Delete Message
Do you think he wants to quit? There is a medication out there called Anabuse(sp) that he could take. You have to want to quit though because if you take the med and then drink, you get sick as a dog! That's what it's supposed to do.

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BlueRoamer
Knowflake

Posts: 942
From: Calm Blue Ocean, Calm Blue Ocean
Registered: Jun 2003

posted August 02, 2005 04:18 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for BlueRoamer     Edit/Delete Message
Sue G, Blue Moon, 26T (hello!), Philbird, you don't know how much your responses mean to me, because I live far from him, the best I can do is hope and pray, thank you all for your healing energy.

Sue he is 26 years old, and Phil I'm not sure he really wants to quit yet. I get the impression that he doens't really want to live his life. He's a neptunian sub ruled scorpio, and its a pretty difficult time of the year to be born. He drinks because hes got so much energy, he has to quell it. He has a grand fire trine, including an aries moon. I've told him about why he does what he does, and he knows its true, but it doesn't help him.

Thanks so much for your responses

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LibraSparkle
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Posts: 4939
From: Vancouver USA
Registered: May 2004

posted August 02, 2005 10:07 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for LibraSparkle     Edit/Delete Message
It seems to me he is probably self medicating his anxiety (fear disorder) with alcohol.

I understand a lot about anxiety, personally. I used to have massive panic attacks regularly. In my teen years, I functioned in a perpetual state of anxiety/fear. No fun. I didn't medicate myself with alcohol, as I had a mother doing just that... which was an excellent example of why not to be an alcoholic.

Anyhow... I see this FABULOUS psychiatrist (cuz I have some issues that run pretty deep... I'm just crazy enough to make life interesting ). He helped me through anxiety without the use of medication.

Here is an excerpt from one of his books on treating fear disorders:

quote:
Treating Fear

STEPS IN TREATING
FEAR DISORDERS


Regardless of therapeutic approach, psychological treatment of fear disorders is an orderly sequence of interventions designed to help terrified people realize that, though their fear is real, the danger it signals is not.


Step 1: External control
The overall goal of psychotherapy is to foster internal control of fear. External control may be a necessary precursor, but it is the beginning, not the end. Medications sometimes help, but they should be the kind that augment internal control (anti-depressants, like Prozac, Paxil, Wellbutrin) not the kind that directly alleviate the symptoms of fear ( Alcohol, Valium, Xanax, Klonopin) Avoiding the situations in which fear occurs may help in the short run, but can quickly become more dangerous than fear.


Step 2: Taking the measure of fear
Once people understand what fear really is, they can begin to act as if it doesn’t exist. Real things have properties. They take up space and have weight. Psychological entities have properties as well. They exist in space and time with measurable intensity and duration. What makes them real is words. Fearful people are encouraged to examine their fear rather than merely reacting to it.


Step 3: Internal control
.Once people understand what fear is, the next step is showing them that, through their actions, they can exert some control over it.

Relaxation and exercise
Though rather low-tech, relaxation training and regular exercise work wonders on two distinct levels. They decrease generalized arousal, thereby raising the threshold for explosions, and they move fearful people from passively accepting their disorder to doing something about it.

Desensitization
The basic behavioral procedure for fear disorders involves substituting relaxation for the fight or flight response, and using the new connection to help frightened people move progressively closer to what they fear.

Cognitive Therapy
The basic idea of this approach is: What you feel is determined by what you say to yourself inside your head. It involves extensive re-recording of the internal soundtrack of existence.


Step 4: Creating a new balance
Fear disorders often develop in people who have difficulty asking for what they do want and saying no to what they don’t want. Sometimes they let their illnesses speak for them when they should be speaking for themselves. When they do speak up, it can cause emotional explosions in the people around them, who wonder why they’re not as compliant as they used to be. It helps to have significant others involved in this phase of treatment.


His site is actually quite informative. If you wanna dink around... http://www.albernstein.com

Maybe your brother can be convinced to seek mental help? It could be that he has some kind of chemical imbalance, or is bi polar.

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BlueRoamer
Knowflake

Posts: 942
From: Calm Blue Ocean, Calm Blue Ocean
Registered: Jun 2003

posted August 02, 2005 10:26 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for BlueRoamer     Edit/Delete Message
He's had a lot of mental help...hes had psychologists, psychiatrists, hes currently medicated

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sue g
Knowflake

Posts: 1584
From: ireland
Registered: Sep 2004

posted August 03, 2005 02:24 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for sue g     Edit/Delete Message
Hi BR

Could I ask you what a neptunian sub ruled scorpio is?

Love and light to you and your bro and you know anytime you wanna chat, please dont hesitate, we are here for you - privilege to talk to you

Sue xxx

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lalalinda
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Posts: 145
From: nevada
Registered: Jun 2005

posted August 03, 2005 04:48 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for lalalinda     Edit/Delete Message
get him to AA fast
it REALLY works

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BlueRoamer
Knowflake

Posts: 942
From: Calm Blue Ocean, Calm Blue Ocean
Registered: Jun 2003

posted August 03, 2005 10:59 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for BlueRoamer     Edit/Delete Message
Hes been in AA I think, he stopped going to his meetings i'm prety sure....I don't think hes accepted god or a higher power yet

Neptune subruled are about nov2-nov 13 i think

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