posted July 04, 2014 06:34 PM            

I'm going to be real with you.

Many think that Twin Flames is your fantasy love story made real, or a happily-ever-after faerie-tale where you meet the other half of your soul and go off into the sunset hand-in-hand.

I'm here to give you a -- friendly -- reality check.

TWIN FLAMES IS NOT ABOUT TWO PEOPLE.

It's about YOU.

This is YOUR journey.

If you think you might be a Twin Flame, and are undergoing a spiritual awakening -- congratulations! The more that can shrug off this third-dimensional illusion -- the better.

The likelihood you've found your Twin Flame? Slim. Very, very slim. Oh, it happens -- but rarely. And it changes your life in ways you could NOT have fathomed prior.

Look at yourself exactly one year in the past, since you begun Awakening.

How much has changed? EVERYTHING? Your concept of reality? The way the universe 'works' ? EVERYTHING you EVER thought about what your life MIGHT be?

You MIGHT be a Twin Flame.

Did the bottom fall out of your reality, like a Companion of Dr Who -- suddenly discovering that NOTHING was the way you thought it was -- in 2012?

You MIGHT be a Twin Flame.

Notice I've said nothing about another person? Oh, sure, they can be the trigger to gutting your reality and shifting your paradigm in astonishing, unimaginable ways. But it usually started before they came on to the scene.

You just didn't NOTICE.

When I first learnt, mid-March 2014, that I was indeed a Twin Flame -- AND that I had located my own -- I was sceptical -- raging against it -- despite the feeling in my gut, in the depths of my soul -- that it was true. Maybe I didn't want to believe it. Maybe I didn't want the TREMENDOUS responsibility.

You know those adventure stories where the hero is told by the wisened sage that they're 'the chosen one' and their journey is about to begin?

Yep.

It's a LOT like that.

If, at this moment, you're contemplating whether or not you are a Twin Flame -- you likely aren't.

I know -- I'm not trying to be insensitive. I'm trying to be real. Nobody wants to hurt feelings, or give the wrong idea -- so there are very little definitives when it comes to Twin Flames. And a HUGE survivor bias. (I'll explain that later.)

If your life hasn't DRAMATICALLY changed -- done a complete 180º, to where the person you were, the world in which you (thought) you lived, and what was your life's purpose? I am highly sceptical you're a Twin Flame.

That DOESN'T mean you aren't here to experience love to the depth and breadth and height -- to reconnect with your most cherished Soulmates, and be a big time proponent of this whole unconditional love thing.

Think of it as a giant cosmic movement, of which we should ALL be a part. Some of us are on the frontlines. Some are pinch-hitters. Some are 'secret weapons', and the 'last resort' -- when battle-plans A through ? fail. I'm learning it's a MUCH more complicated, unfolding, and evolving thing than I EVER imagined -- or could have hoped to.

I think the more important question is what does a Twin Flame mean to you? That varies -- wildly -- depending upon who you ask. For some, 'finding their Twin Flame' becomes the be-all, end-all of their existence -- a powerful obsession, about which they become defensive, and largely isolated, since many don't understand. They then seek to congregate in groups of those who are reported to, or identify as Twin Flames.

Quick note --

Many of them aren't, by the way. But some are. Some are very genuine. I've heard that Twin Flames can easily identify other Twin Flames; I thought -- well, isn't THAT convenient. Honestly, I have to say -- that may be true. I can't explain it, either. But I DO know, and can tell, almost immediately, if someone is, or is not, a Twin Flame. It drives me a little crazy. I don't like being the bearer of bad news, so most of the time, unless I can tell, right off the bat, when I'm dealing with another Twin Flame -- I'll take a polite exit from the conversation.

After all, this seems to be a very, very sensitive topic. THAT's my greatest concern.

Nobody seeks to 'be confirmed' as a Twin Flame. It's ALWAYS 'is THIS my Twin Flame?'

Honestly? Truly?

It doesn't matter. I used to think it had, though, so the fact that many are under this impression doesn't surprise me; it's being perpetuated by those who seem to be going off of bad information. There's a LOT of it out there.

Fortunately, I've been able to cobble together some excellent markers for identifying if someone is a Twin Flame, thanks to brilliant research done by those whose advancement greatly (and currently) exceeds my own.

Now, why is it about YOU and not whoever your Twin Flame might be?

Well, you're going to Ascend together no matter how you slice it -- we forget that. The issue then becomes how we spend our time together (or apart) on Earth. Having an amicable relationship, if not close, is obviously preferable. Fighting sucks -- to say the least. Cutting the cord -- NOT an option (and I can explain why; personal experience -- just trust me on this one: confront it, don't drag it out, and don't seek to be 'relieved' from the Universe).

So, the journey, as many wise and wonderful women here will tell you, with their own experiences, is about YOU. It's not about a perfect love relationship. It's not about romantic ideals. Frankly, I think what it's 'about' varies so much from person to person, we'd be remiss to say, 'it's about this,' in any respect.

Now, I'm of the (probably new and minority) opinion that the Twin Flame journey is undertaken by one, beginning at birth, involves many, many Soulmates, Karmic Partners, one Guardian Soul (typically encountered later in the journey, with indications or 'signposts' along the way, pointing to an eventual meeting) and, at long last, some form of Reunion with our Twin Flame.

Now. Survivor Bias.

My husband (one of my dearest companion Soulmates and karmic partners) and I have been contemplating the likelihood there's also a survivor bias at work here:

That there are far less Reunions here on Earth than we're thinking.

Why? Survivor bias is a statistical term when our population is being confounded by an unaccounted for variable -- in this case, it's a reporting bias.

We're really only hearing from Reunited Twin Flames in the 'confirmed' category. The rest of us sorry sacks which have to do a lot of self-work and evolving -- we get lumped into 'who knows?' and 'maybe' and 'guess time will tell'.

Thank God for astrology. At least NOW we have SOME sort of tool that can guide us in one direction or the other -- either way, encouraging our evolution -- and that of those around us. That's a pretty big win for 'our side', so to speak.

What is 'our side' -- this growing army of Soulmates and Twin Flames? Who can honestly say? The overall, underlying, repetitive theme seems to be shockingly simple.

Love.

Well -- UNCONDITIONAL love. Most of us can hack love. Unconditional love? THAT's the lesson.

Pop quiz. It starts with ...

... your Twin Flame?

NO!

It starts with YOU!

You're practically useless -- in evolutionary terms -- until you master (or at least pass the core curriculum on) self love.

As a therapist, I couldn't help but notice how many 'hopeful Twin Flames' were actually seeking to fill a very deep void, left from childhood wounds, adolescent betrayals and adult failures.

That's not a void your Twin's going to fill -- and you can't expect them to. That's ALL on you.

And don't even get me started on the Twin Flame Mission. I'd love to tell you it's all about finding the one who completes you in every way and living a life of pure love and devotion, radiating the power of that love.

But this is Earth. Land of Dualism. Individuation.

Now, if you're a Twin Flame, you've returned to help with the Grand Plan. You already did that whole individuality thing. But there has to be SOME reason we're back. Right? That's a longer discussion -- and the debates can be very lengthy and involved, indeed.

We're here to WORK. Spiritually sweat. Nose to the cosmic grindstone. We're here to resolve OUR individual conflicts and personal issues, in hopes that we can achieve SUCH a potent self-love that it DOES radiate from us, to others, and we can be an ultimate force of healing, salvation, and pure, unadulterated -- love.

Up to the task?

You MIGHT be a Twin Flame.

posted July 04, 2014 07:47 PM            

How much has changed? EVERYTHING? Your concept of reality? The way the universe 'works' ? EVERYTHING you EVER thought about what your life MIGHT be?

You MIGHT be a Twin Flame.

Did the bottom fall out of your reality, like a Companion of Dr Who -- suddenly discovering that NOTHING was the way you thought it was -- in 2012?

You MIGHT be a Twin Flame."

posted July 04, 2014 08:06 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by tgem:
"Look at yourself exactly one year in the past, since you begun Awakening.

How much has changed? EVERYTHING? Your concept of reality? The way the universe 'works' ? EVERYTHING you EVER thought about what your life MIGHT be?

You MIGHT be a Twin Flame.

Did the bottom fall out of your reality, like a Companion of Dr Who -- suddenly discovering that NOTHING was the way you thought it was -- in 2012?

You MIGHT be a Twin Flame."

Been there...done that. Yep, I'm in.

---

posted July 04, 2014 08:43 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Blind writer:
Despite everything, the greatest thing any of us can do is self-improve. People cannot help but want a pat on the back, or a smidge of proof they've done a good job. Guidance of a sort, or a badge to justify the path they're on. That is not how things work, though.

Everything in the universe begins with self. As one of my favorite sayings go: "what others do is their karma, how you react is yours". What good have You done for yourself, for those you love, and perhaps most importantly, for those who are strangers, or honestly in need? One's interpretation will invariably vary (hah), but as long as we all can hope for a better tomorrow, then we're moving in a brighter direction.

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Well stated, and more than appropriate coming from the first to independent confirm a Guardian status to me.

posted July 04, 2014 08:48 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by IndigoDirae:

Well stated, and more than appropriate coming from the first to independent confirm a Guardian status to me.

How on earth is that going anyway? I know you were having a time with tPANDORA-URA opposite your nMOON/ATLANTIS/PLUTO -- and tPLUTO opp tSUN squaring to boot.

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posted July 04, 2014 08:59 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by IndigoDirae:
:: hugs ::

You're not alone. I've felt it on all-sides today. It seemed wise to stay safe and keep close to home.

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posted July 05, 2014 01:08 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by IndigoDirae:
Thank God for astrology. At least NOW we have SOME sort of tool that can guide us in one direction or the other -- either way, encouraging our evolution -- and that of those around us. That's a pretty big win for 'our side', so to speak.

---

Astro is a useful tool, but try not to lose sight of spirit/higher self/source...That's the beauty and power of this Union; it's a direct connection to the Divine. It Is Divine...

posted July 05, 2014 07:24 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Gabby:
Indigo....are you ok??

Great thread, btw!

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Thanks, Gabby. To be completely frank, I'm having a flare up of fibromyalgia. It feels all but gone -- or simply managed -- most of the time. But ALL of the past month seemed to converge to bring about one.

I'm great mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. So I'll be just fine physically, too. I'll just pay closer attention to what my body is saying -- I'm not the best there. I'm too 'mental'.

posted July 05, 2014 07:27 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aurora_girl1990:
Hey Indigo,could you identify if i'm a twin flame or not please?

Thanks and i hope you're feeling better.

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posted July 05, 2014 08:11 AM            

I was so hung up on the twin flame thing for a couple of years that it got to the point when I just got fed up with the whole thing.

Now, I'm not discrediting the theory but I think this concept can really make a person lose sight of what's important.
As you said the real twin flame experience isn't meant to make you focus on the other person but on yourself. Or at least, being a twin flame shouldn't make you lose sight of your own growth which I think happens when we become obsessed with this.

The whole experience with my "TF" has thought me to appreciate things for what they are. So what if he's a soul mate or twin flame! The experience wasn't less important because of a label attached to it. My spiritual awakening began a long time ago (very slowly) but meeting him has changed my perspective drastically and I'm thankful no matter what he is to me.

posted July 05, 2014 10:00 AM            

I love my husband and feel bad talking about the ole ex-soulmate/TF...whatever. But sometimes I can't help relating what I've been through...laying out the complexity of the romantic path I travelled.

posted July 05, 2014 01:48 PM            

I am not a twin and life goes on just the same. I have decided post-Bull not to think about this anymore, twin or no twin, it makes no difference to me. It's a less glamorous take on romance but it keeps me real and for someone with DC ruler conj Neptune and SN, real is very important. However, I liked your take on it very much.

posted July 05, 2014 02:42 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Ceridwen:
I hope you feel better soon, Indigo.

But I think since you are rebalanced emotionally, spiritually, mentally, the physical will follow back to balance.

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You're absolutely right, Ceri. In fact ... I woke up feeling as if EVERYTHING was different. There's only an echo of the pain from yesterday. And I was THIS close to having to go get x-rays, and an adjustment -- and so on. REALLY did not want to.

posted July 05, 2014 03:15 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Heartsong11:
Great thread Indigo and hope you're ok

I was so hung up on the twin flame thing for a couple of years that it got to the point when I just got fed up with the whole thing.

Now, I'm not discrediting the theory but I think this concept can really make a person lose sight of what's important.

As you said the real twin flame experience isn't meant to make you focus on the other person but on yourself. Or at least, being a twin flame shouldn't make you lose sight of your own growth which I think happens when we become obsessed with this.

The whole experience with my "TF" has thought me to appreciate things for what they are. So what if he's a soul mate or twin flame! The experience wasn't less important because of a label attached to it. My spiritual awakening began a long time ago (very slowly) but meeting him has changed my perspective drastically and I'm thankful no matter what he is to me.

Thanks for this post

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Perfect, Heartsong. You got it.

When I saw this happening so widespread, I became seriously concerned. It's no different than clients in my practise seeking to fill their own void with another person -- interpersonal relating 101 no-no.

Sometimes I wonder if some of us are so independent, or otherwise past a lot of the possessive and clinging behaviours, that nothing less than our Twin Flame can make us really pay attention -- to where we're going, what we're doing -- and how we are -- or aren't, evolving.

For me, it was the incredible 'coincidence' of creating a Twin Flame story -- knowing nothing of the whole Twin Flames thingummy. Since I'm an unrepentant researcher, it compelled me to get VERY educated on the subject.

Did it ever tingle in the back of my mind that he was somehow intrinsically connected to it? I mean, with how unbelievably protective I am of my work, just KNOWING he was the one who was supposed to develop and 'operate' (write) my main character? That it was 'his' and all I'd done was reunite the two energies?

Not until I ran our composite. I'd never seen ANYTHING remotely like it -- and I'd run a LOT of composites. Hundreds. Maybe more.

What got me was the way he, having no idea or concept of proper astrology, 'interpreted' it.

'It means we're soulmates.'

I don't even remember what I said -- except I was the one suddenly dodging and diverting. Honestly saying I had no idea WHAT it meant -- but it was definitely important. It wasn't a passing comment, either. When he asked for general advice on who are 'best matches', I gave him the dates for when the SUN was conjunct his MOON. He noticed my birthday wasn't in there.

'But we're soulmates.'

So, no -- on some level ... despite all of the insanity of it all ... he was serious. Of course, it would be a number of years before I would finally confront the truth of the matter.

But I kept coming back, or staying in contact on some level, because of the story. I couldn't let THAT go. Ever. Having to lose one of the best Twin Flame stories this world will honestly ever see -- one to which people can relate, that's down to earth, and bizarrely based in reality -- that felt like a horrible failure.

Am I trying to fill a void?

I feel that my creativity is an expression of the very depths of my soul, made manifest to share with others -- that it's a BIG part of what I'm here to do.

posted July 05, 2014 03:57 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Gabby:

Honestly I think the very most genuine way to know if you've met your twin flame is if after the experience is over....can you love again? Can you find love again? Or do all relationships seem void of truth after that? Missing some really huge depth, like they are almost fake?
If so and you have gradually learn trying to be involved in that kind of love hurts more than it helps and decide being alone, working on yourself, is the only right thing to do....you probably just had a twinflame experience.

I'm saying even years n years later your still looking for a love that helps you forget that person, but everything feels shallow and meaningless by comparison...you probably met your TF.

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And for the first time, Gabby, we disagree.

I suppose I'm learning, and playing, by an entirely new set of rules here -- but that's not quite my experience.

When my Twin lied to me, straight to my face, refusing to confess his identity -- I'd already become engaged two months prior. Because I made myself forget him; I forced myself to believe his reticence and withholding was due to his never having loved me -- never intending to go beyond what we had: a bizarre level of unprecedented honesty despite the anonymity.

I couldn't not marry my fiancé. I couldn't abandon my to-be-stepdaughter. I couldn't. Could you? Not me. I knew that was going to be a crucial part of my path. I couldn't turn back now and run -- ironically -- to my Twin. No doubt HE would've then done the running -- and maybe even worse. Who knows?

So I can't say I never loved again. I learnt. I pushed myself. Can it ever be THAT? No. And don't think my husband hasn't had to adjust to this. It's been hard for the both of us, really, just accepting that my Twin couldn't hack it. And so ... here I am. Somehow, managing being a wife and mother -- not married to my Twin Flame, and teaching both of them -- AND my Guardian Soul -- unconditional love.

Now having no contact, being estranged from my Twin -- that was horrible. I couldn't deal with it. I admit that. NO contact? No. Even acting like acquaintances. No. Real -- or nothing.

But I'm still loving. I'm just loving MYSELF now, too. That's what was missing. The huge lacking piece. But, no. I can love. Oddly, I can love better and more completely than ever. More fully. More truly. Less fearfully. Less anxiously.