posted August 02, 2014 09:47 PM            

As always, I'm curious about real life examples, observations, theory corrections and so on.

Here's what I heard and read about in theory:

Saturn square/opp/conj Mars - Saturn refuses to provide sex, Mars gets overcritized, a general diminishing of sexual contacts overtime

Mars square/opp Neptune - dramatically different sexual tastes and preferences

Mars square Mars (or Water/Earth Mars vs Fire/Air Mars) - expressing sexuality too differently from each other

Mars opposite/square Moon - sex is emotionally unsatisfying

8th house square/opposite 5th house - very different tastes and styles

8th house rulers opp/square each other
5th house rulers - same

zero aspects between 5th and 8th - can be rather lacklustre

Someone's Saturn falls into 5th or especially 8th house - see Saturn stuff earlier

Someone's Mars falls into 12th house - the owner of 12th house doesn't really want to have sex with the Mars person or isn't too much into sex with them

Examples and experience

I personally found Mars square Saturn to be more about power struggles on a psychological level than about sex. But then we had a ton of great sex aspects in synastry, maybe it just couldn't overthrow those.

examples from other people

synastry 1

his Saturn conj her Mars (8th ruler)
Saturn square Neptune
Earth Mars vs Air Mars (no actual aspect)
5th and/or 8th rulers have no aspects to 5th and/or 8th rulers

they had those sexy aspects
his Mars conj her Asc
her Venus opp his Mars
her Pluto trine his Moon
his Pluto trine her Venus

Didn't help. Not the worst sex ever, but both call it unsatisfying and sort of boring, they aren't attracted to each other's natural styles and have different preferences and body rhythms. They need to put on an act if they want to impress and satisfy each other. Initially they had great physical attraction (she even said she never wanted another man so strongly before) but it is fizzling out and their sexual contacts become less and less frequent.

Synastry 2

his Mars (8th ruler) opp her Neptune
his Neptune square her Saturn
Mars in Air vs Mars in Earth (no aspect)

They had those sexy aspects

his Venus square her Mars (5th ruler)
his Mars (8th ruler) trine her Pluto
her 5th ruler trine his 5th ruler

posted August 02, 2014 11:19 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by starrynight:

8th house square/opposite 5th house - very different tastes and styles

Someone's Saturn falls into 5th or especially 8th house - see Saturn stuff earlier

Someone's Mars falls into 12th house - the owner of 12th house doesn't really want to have sex with the Mars person or isn't too much into sex with them

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I have these with my partner.

His 8C is CAN, my 5C's CAP. No issues here. Our styles mesh perfectly. Eerily, I'd say. We have identical profiles and issues. It's rather spooky.

His SATURN is in my 8H. It definitely orients a dominant dynamic towards me -- but I never feel unsafe, taken advantage of, or otherwise controlled. But he handles power very well; he has a lot of experience.

posted August 02, 2014 11:25 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by starrynight:
They've been married for several years and had great emotional contact (DW Moons in 8th in synastry), but from the description, there was always something a little off about sex. Even when it was good, there was some detail that went wrong, something not quite "it". He also had a habit of saying it was her fault when sex wasn't awesome. In short, it wasn't like it was truly bad, but it was never really good either.

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Sounds like a failure of intimacy, actually. Extreme honesty is required with an 8H Lunar overlay.

I find with most couples that they're running independent scripts during sex, which hinders intimacy. It's only when people agree to be present with one another during the physical act that intimacy is achieved.

posted August 02, 2014 11:42 PM            

Any idea if a SATURN transit could bring on a period of anorgasmia? I seem to be dealing with it for the first time in my life. Very strange.

posted August 03, 2014 12:14 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by IndigoDirae:
I have these with my partner.

His 8C is CAN, my 5C's CAP. No issues here. Our styles mesh perfectly. Eerily, I'd say. We have identical profiles and issues. It's rather spooky.

His SATURN is in my 8H. It definitely orients a dominant dynamic towards me -- but I never feel unsafe, taken advantage of, or otherwise controlled. But he handles power very well; he has a lot of experience.

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Maybe it's just hopeful thinking because the guy I'm dating right now--no sex yet--has his Saturn in the 8th house square my Mars, too. Though at the same time his actual ruler of 8th falls into my 5th house for a conjunction with my 5th ruler Mars and his own Mars while my Venus, Jupiter and Saturn have a threesome party in his 8th. Kind of controversial, hehe.

I was just told about another case of "trouble reading interest" with Mars in 12th.

quote:

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Originally posted by IndigoDirae:
Sounds like a failure of intimacy, actually. Extreme honesty is required with an 8H Lunar overlay.

I find with most couples that they're running independent scripts during sex, which hinders intimacy. It's only when people agree to be present with one another during the physical act that intimacy is achieved.

On top of it, one partner blaming the other for bad sex? Wow. He sounds like a real winner. That's usually an underlying anxiety pattern stemming from fear of poor performance. The blaming is just icing on the cake -- and hella abusive.

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This anxiety pattern is actually curious. I'll allow myself to get distracted from sex for a moment.
Her Saturn and Jupiter both fall in his 1st house. He seemed to go from "I'm lucky to have met you" to "you are too bossy and overbearing and stifle my masculinity", like mood swings, all the time.

Oh I made a mistake, sorry.
Her Moon falls into his 10th house, no DW. But his Cancer Moon falls in her 8th house and conjuncts her own Cancer Moon (8th ruler) there very tightly.

His Venus also falls into her 8th house. Square her Mars. He kept complaining she made him feel weak and "like a girl"(his words and he meant in a bad way). He tried to put her down to make himself feel more in control and stronger.

In synastry, her Mars sextile his Moon, square his Venus, square his Lilith.
His Mars opp her Neptune and trine her Pluto and that's it. Her Saturn also square his Moon.

I always thought that might be the problem. His Sun and Mars have no aspects to her personal planets. Only his Moon and Venus do, and both receive some harsh aspects along with harmonious ones.
At the same time, her own Venus only has a conjunction to his Mercury, and her Moon has nothing beyond a conjunction to his Moon.

posted August 03, 2014 04:13 AM            

I've really only limited experience with the 8H/SATURN overlay at the moment, which is a natural dominant orientation it would seem. But then his MOON and EROS are also in my 8H; natally being in his 5H, it's like overlaying into my 8H suddenly activated them after lying dormant. And they're involved in a right T-Square, too! 10H/5R MARS-LILITH (exactly on my PLUTO) opposite 5H/8R MOON-NYMPHE and square 8H/10R MERC. The repetitive representation of the three in that one configuration is astounding.

MOON is already oriented towards sexual intimacy in the 8H, but SATURN there is primed to dominate and take control. That's why it's looking like a natural 'dominant' aspect / overlay.

I'd have to see what NEPTUNE is ruling in the case of the marrieds. Typically, if anything is stifling an 8H MOON overlay, there will be problems. I also agree that if a man's 'most attached to' points aren't being aspected in a synastry, he may feel as if he's struggling to maintain his identity. If they're SUN-MARS -- ooh, brother. Top of the chart? Oh, boy. It does sound as if sex may be an undercurrent and psychological battleground for them due to his ego being unsupported. That's a rough place. It takes some serous evolving and more honesty than most are capable of.

It's amazing to me how people can have sex for years, conducting a complete relationship, and not actually be experiencing intimacy.

If NEP is afflicted, that COULD indicate these 'separate scripts'. PLUTO, of course, is the domain of power plays and unresolved struggles for dominance. 8R can sometimes tell a bit more of that story, too, once it's already going.

posted August 03, 2014 04:15 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by next to neptune:
I dont understand the problem with having someones Mars falling in the others 12th house? Some people say this is highly sensual and also sexual….

My partners mars falls in my 12th house, and I have never had a problem with him sexually, we can't get enough of each other, thats the only "problem" lol:P

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Depends on how that MARS is positioned, as well as the disposition of the 12H. Other factors can smooth over some of the basic misunderstanding involved in the overlay.

posted August 03, 2014 06:36 AM            

I think in order to evaluate sexual compatibility, you need a checklist, not certain aspects:

- evaluation of the natal needs: some people need a square to their sexual planets, other need a trine etc.
-more than one Yin/Yang pair between those two people, according to their natal needs: general Yin/Yang pairs:

Sun/Moon
Venus/Mars
Moon/Mars
Venus to outer planets
Mars/Neptune

- sexual rulers connected
-overlays in sexual houses
- a presence of both attraction and compatibility factors