posted October 02, 2014 09:24 AM            

I just registered to the forum after scrolling through for years, and this is my first post! Hope to continue to hop on here and post often!

Over the past year I have become close to a female friend who is really a blast to be around. Honestly she is one of my closest friends, she would do anything for me and we share MANY of the same interests and values. I really enjoy her friendship, but I'm afraid I'm trying to make a square peg try to fit in a round hole with this one.

She is a Scorpio Ascendant with a natal 12th House Pluto and 1st House Saturn conjunct her Ascendant, so honestly she comes across as EXTREMELY Plutonian but also very rigid & has a "parenting" energy about her. With the 12th House influence I am almost certain she has no clue how she comes across whatsoever. My best friend of 15 years met her once and hated her guts (he's a Gemini Sun/Aries Moon - no wonder). I'm not knocking the Pluto/Saturn energy, Scorpios kick ass, and Saturn can be very stabilizing, but this is one of the more intense "Scorpio energies" I've ever encountered. Additionally, her Libra sun and Virgo moon hug my ascendant on each side. So needless to say this friendship has been very intense for me when I met her. It's a bit of a love hate relationship at this point! I love her Libra/Virgo energy, I can't stand the intensity of many of her shadow Scorpio traits. I keep holding out thinking we'll move through it and then something happens that really just bothers the hell out of me and I want to run for the hills!!

She is very wise and can cut through the ******** . The Scorpio in her knows how to stick to something and get it done, which my Gemini Moon energy needs (there is something to learn from each other). She is a natural healer and I find myself constantly in situations where she is counseling me (which to be honest I don't really like). I get the feeling I am being manipulated all the time, which is tiring, just let things progress as they are! She actually kind of scares me, which is of course a very Pluto/Scorpio thing. I also find myself having to explain or justify other friendships to her (even ones I've had for YEARS) and even life pursuits, she wants me to go her route and not my own. Honestly, she is a very demanding friend, wanting to be with me a LOT, but a very dynamic one. I need space. I don't like all the attention I feel I have to give her, she EXPECTS me to be around her often or to make her one of my highest priorities. However I do get a lot out of the friendship, I have learned a lot about myself and she has been extremely supportive. Most of all, I'm terrible with setting boundaries with people, and boundaries are laughable to her. She's a self professed "boundary pusher".

I'm ALL Mercurial (Asc/Sun Virgo, Moon Gemini with Mercury dominating my chart), but have TONS of Leo energy from Mercury/Venus/Mars. I am very high strung, but warm. She is a bit cold and domineering, but nurturing. I am also hard to peg down. I don't like intensity at all, I like lightheartedness. I don't like to be controlled or possessed, like that is a quick way to make me cut you off. I cut her off this summer after she just about smothered me this spring, wanting to involve herself in nearly EVERY aspect of my life. For example I was asked to teach a yoga class, and when she found out she demanded that she co-teach, refused to take no for an answer, found the person who offered me the job, and injected herself in the situation. I wound up canceling the class and didn't want to be around her. Then I felt bad because I feel like she really doesn't realize how she comes across. I felt I was being an ******* , & started to include her in things again. Now I'm here, posting about the friendship after she threw around the idea of us scheduling going to the grocery store every week together. I just can't handle all of that.

Here is the other element. I have a T-Square in my natal chart, with Pluto at the apex in my Scorpio ruled 2nd house (Venus in Leo 11th and Jupiter in Aquarius 5th). I'm afraid if I don't learn how to interact with her, then I will continue to attract this. I like to think I can adapt to most friendships and situations, I pride myself on it, but this is one I'm sure sure I can adapt to. I also think my flightiness has something to learn from Scorpios, but I fear this friendship is just doomed.

Can my Gemini/Virgo/flighty energy make this very Scorpio friend work? I know Virgos and Scorpios can and do get along very well in many instances, but something in me just is irked by all this possessiveness and constant justifying. Should I expect her to tone down the possessive nature or is this something she really just can't help & probably wont change?