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Author Topic:   We could be together, but...?
ikja
Knowflake

Posts: 165
From: London, UK
Registered: Oct 2014

posted November 16, 2014 04:54 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for ikja     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I have a friend that I have known for a long time. When we were younger we were very close - best friends. We would say 'I love you' and all sorts. We've argued a lot since then, but always made it back. I would say that it's usually because he has been insensitive and my Aries mars has been been very quick to respond. Either putting distance between us or by 'going off' (not some of my finest teenage years).

Despite all of that, when we get together (back then and even now)... It's always comfortable and we get on. Talk. We reminisce. He has taken to calling me before work recently and we spent all of last night playing songs that we used to listen to 8/9 years ago. I swear, sometimes, I feel the love when he looks at me and I look at him, but I can't describe it.

We do date other people. He teases me about my choice in men and I tease him about his choices in women. In my opinion, if we wanted to make it work between us... I THINK that we actually could. But, I think we've both got our ideals about how "perfect" partner should look and the other person doesn't fit our defined mould.

However, I wanted to present the aspects that were present in our synastry. Though I've tried to press him for a birth time, I've had no joy... So these have been generated using 12:00pm:


(I'm Horizontal and he is Vertical)

Our relationship does frustrate me, but I wanted to start a discussion about the aspects in synastry that prompt the sentence 'we could be together, but...'

In my opinion, the HUGE 'buts' in our synastry are the MARS aspects - grrrrrrr! It makes us very up and down and I think that my friend cannot handle being seperated from me often. I think it actually hurts his feelings.

What about your relationships? Is there someone, are their people that you think you could be with if it wasn't for dominant aspects in your synastry?

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Enneline
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Posts: 1507
From:
Registered: Nov 2012

posted November 16, 2014 05:04 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Enneline     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
post a synastry please

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ikja
Knowflake

Posts: 165
From: London, UK
Registered: Oct 2014

posted November 16, 2014 05:20 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for ikja     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Enneline:
post a synastry please

Hi Enneline,

This is the synastry:

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Enneline
Knowflake

Posts: 1507
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Registered: Nov 2012

posted November 16, 2014 11:48 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Enneline     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
who is who?

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ikja
Knowflake

Posts: 165
From: London, UK
Registered: Oct 2014

posted November 16, 2014 12:06 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for ikja     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Enneline:
who is who?

My fault, I'm forgetting the basics lol - I'm on the inside. My friend is on the outside

------------------
When in doubt, ask questions.

 ❤

Sun: ♊, Asc: ♏,
Moon: ♈, Venus: ♉, Mercury: ♊, Jupiter: ♋

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Enneline
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Posts: 1507
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posted November 16, 2014 12:29 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Enneline     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
To be honest I don't see too much of sexual attraction here. You get along great and feel attracted (very wide venus&merc conj, luminaries to hard aspect to sun/moon midp etc.)to each other but not really in a sexual way but to be honest your synastry looks boring. You don't bring anything new to each other.

but often friendships result in marriages

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ikja
Knowflake

Posts: 165
From: London, UK
Registered: Oct 2014

posted November 16, 2014 12:41 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for ikja     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Enneline:
To be honest I don't see too much of sexual attraction here. You get along great and feel attracted (very wide venus&merc conj, luminaries to hard aspect to sun/moon midp etc.)to each other but not really in a sexual way but to be honest your synastry looks boring. You don't bring anything new to each other.

but often friendships result in marriages


I appreciate your perspective. I would disagree with we 'don't bring something 'new' to eachother, because we always come back together and he consults with me on many things. In addition, as stated, his birth time is not exact so, I can't really confirm or deny the rest of what you've said lol. Our relationship may prove 'less boring' after the consideration of these aspects in relation to our houses and also our Natalia in relation to our synastry/composite charts - who knows? (I may never lol)

But as a side note, sexual attraction to me doesn't MAKE a relationship. For me, it's about how deep and open I can be with someone. Maybe that's my Venus/Pluto aspect. Maybe it's also a Gemini thing and even Scorpio ascendant thing. So, when there's talk of no "explicit" sexual attraction in charts... That doesn't make sense to me, but that's just me. I've had Venus/Mars aspects with people and I have found those relationships unbearable.

With that said, the point of this thread isn't/wasn't to go into substantial detail about my relationship with this particular person... It was to see if there were any other people in the forum who FEEL like they could possibly be with someone if it wasn't for a particular aspect or aspects in synastry which they often see playing out.

------------------
When in doubt, ask questions.

 ❤

Sun: ♊, Asc: ♏,
Moon: ♈, Venus: ♉, Mercury: ♊, Jupiter: ♋

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page one
Knowflake

Posts: 420
From: USA
Registered: Jun 2012

posted November 16, 2014 07:12 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for page one     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
After mir's progressions threads, I'm tempted to say Sun square Venus could be a culprit. Plus maybe Sun opp Juno. And the only other aspect you make to his Venus is with a Saturn sextile.

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Aubyanne
Moderator

Posts: 1350
From: Tinseltown, Hollyweird, The Multiverse
Registered: Sep 2014

posted November 16, 2014 08:18 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Aubyanne     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by page one:
After mir's progressions threads, I'm tempted to say Sun square Venus could be a culprit. Plus maybe Sun opp Juno. And the only other aspect you make to his Venus is with a Saturn sextile.

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ikja
Knowflake

Posts: 165
From: London, UK
Registered: Oct 2014

posted November 16, 2014 08:28 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for ikja     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Aubyanne:

Who wants to be a dear and link me to said threads? Lol

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Aubyanne
Moderator

Posts: 1350
From: Tinseltown, Hollyweird, The Multiverse
Registered: Sep 2014

posted November 16, 2014 08:50 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Aubyanne     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Besides, the reasons can range from fear to immaturity.

My Twin and I could've been quite the dynamic duo, but he's still working off years of malimprinting, which has left him emotionally abusive, and both of us scared of the intensity we felt since Day One. So, once it came time to film together, (spoiler alert: it all fell apart before that happened) he broke my heart into a thousand pieces, saying things to me designed to wound with such potency, because of his fear and fury at the fact that I'd been pulling away (due to his aforementioned emotional abuse). The fact he'd mentioned that a month later, (once I took his call) honestly didn't help. The damage was done.

I felt emotionally slaughtered. And the truth was, he can only manage casual relationships, (really, not even relationships -- more like encounters) and we're SO much more than that -- it was better to just not approach a sexual relationship at all. Unfortunately, our chemistry is too strong; without an outlet, it becomes anger -- and an outlet is just not going to happen.

I know, I know I'll have to deal with it EVENTUALLY. But I'm going to put that off for as long as I can, and focus on the life I'm living, and the relationships I have, right now.

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Aubyanne
Moderator

Posts: 1350
From: Tinseltown, Hollyweird, The Multiverse
Registered: Sep 2014

posted November 16, 2014 08:51 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Aubyanne     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by ikja:
Who wants to be a dear and link me to said threads? Lol

Oh, there are many. Many, many. I highly suggest doing a site search with 'mir' and 'progressions' or 'progressed chart' as your terms.

I can't think of any in particular to link just at the moment. But I know a search will uncover many over the years.

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ikja
Knowflake

Posts: 165
From: London, UK
Registered: Oct 2014

posted November 17, 2014 03:18 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for ikja     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Aubyanne:
Besides, the reasons can range from fear to immaturity.

My Twin and I could've been quite the dynamic duo, but he's still working off years of malimprinting, which has left him emotionally abusive, and both of us scared of the intensity we felt since Day One. So, once it came time to film together, (spoiler alert: it all fell apart before that happened) he broke my heart into a thousand pieces, saying things to me designed to wound with such potency, because of his fear and fury at the fact that I'd been pulling away (due to his aforementioned emotional abuse). The fact he'd mentioned that a month later, (once I took his call) honestly didn't help. The damage was done.

I felt emotionally slaughtered. And the truth was, he can only manage casual relationships, (really, not even relationships -- more like encounters) and we're SO much more than that -- it was better to just not approach a sexual relationship at all. Unfortunately, our chemistry is too strong; without an outlet, it becomes anger -- and an outlet is just not going to happen.

I know, I know I'll have to deal with it EVENTUALLY. But I'm going to put that off for as long as I can, and focus on the life I'm living, and the relationships I have, right now.


I hate sad love stories. Call it the Taurus Venus in me.
I understand what you're saying about the immaturity/fear thing. I'm convinced that the reason why me and my someone who I love dearly are not together is because he is somewhat scared that he has found someone who really wants to get really deep and he just isn't there yet. He is not ready to feel the intensity. It used to be me, but now it is his turn and I really do wonder about a future. At the moment, we are in no contact and I don't see me breaking my silence any time soon because I'm still trying to recover from his emotional unavailability. One day at a time eh?
With that relationship, there was a lot of saturn aspects. So, we are definitely "binded" for life; but... Uranus is also factors in there. Rather sad, but many neccessary for us to grow as people before we can begin again more maturely and intelligently.

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starmoon
Knowflake

Posts: 1487
From:
Registered: Sep 2011

posted November 17, 2014 11:23 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for starmoon     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Enneline:
To be honest I don't see too much of sexual attraction here. You get along great and feel attracted (very wide venus&merc conj, luminaries to hard aspect to sun/moon midp etc.)to each other but not really in a sexual way but to be honest your synastry looks boring. You don't bring anything new to each other.

but often friendships result in marriages


looks like just friendship. maybe a correct TOB would make the positions more favorable.

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