posted April 13, 2015 09:17 PM            

I realize that I don't know you and maybe I shouldn't give you advice that you never asked for - but I've replied to a few of your past posts and threads about this man - and I feel for your situation.

My impression is that you have some emotional problems and the fact that he rejected you triggered your past problems. He is just one person... He doesn't want to be with you, but it's ok. It's his prerogative. He's just one fish in a very big sea. There are MANY more swimming along.
This guy is irrelevant to your life now, in your present. He is out of your life and belongs in your past.
I think it's very important for you to draw a line and say "This is completely over and I'm completely done."

Based on your chart and the way you come across - you seem like a strong and confident person. This is why I think this particular man triggered some past memories or subconscious past hurts - and hence had such a serious impact on you. I don't think this is the way you always react to being rejected. You should try to figure out - why this whole thing affected you so much.

I'll just give you a "classic" example. I don't know if this is your situation, but it might be something similar. Lets say a woman has a complicated relationship with her father. She loves him very much, feels abused by her mother - but he never helps or protects her and he is never there for her, so she feels betrayed. He says he loves her back but he only sees her once per year because he is always busy with work or other things. If this woman meets a man who reminds her of her father, later on in her life, she would be much more vulnerable to being rejected by this man and much more hung up on his love and approval.

^ Obviously this might not be your situation at all - but whatever your situation is - I really feel like there are some past emotional wounds that you need to heal - that this Taurus guy opened up ... And this is why you find it so hard to "let go".
This is not about him. As I said, he is just a random guy, very random actually. I can tell you more about his chart, as I have in the past - but I feel like it's mostly irrelevant - because it's not about him. It's about whatever you projected onto him.

In my opinion this man's chart makes for an extremely selfish, hedonistic and self-centred personality bordering on narcissism. Everything is ALL about him and he has no comprehension of your feelings, or any other woman's feelings. Empathy is definitely not strong in this one. He is lazy, chauvinistic and expects women to look after him in every way.

He is also pretty "thick" in the sense that his intelligence only extends to practical and pragmatic matters. He is entirely unable to "think outside the box" and to understand true spirituality. If he is religious, which he may well be - then he is religious in a robotic way, following what his parents taught him to do every Sunday. But he has no deeper understanding of this world or spirituality (As you do).
So - to sum up - He is childish, lacks intellectual depth, selfish and every woman's worst nightmare as a husband and father.

When I read this: "Now he happily in love (1st time apparently) with a young girl who lives an hr and a half away that he basically worships" --- My first thought was: Is she rich? LoL Or are her parents rich? Because this guy falls in love with one thing, and that thing is money.
He also cares about food and sex, don't get me wrong. But money is his first TRUE love.

^ This of course is my very biased opinion, but I've had enough experiences with similar placements in a chart to form that opinion.
I am sure he has redeeming qualities, but whatever they are - they won't mean much in the context of a relationship. He might make a perfect son and awesome employee. But he will never make the perfect spouse.

Ok ... So that's "him" ^! But basically, he's just a regular morron and the way he treated you was disrespectful. The fact that he seems so special to you - is the real problem.
You need to see things more clearly, for what they are not what you want them to be - to move on from this.

posted April 13, 2015 11:55 PM            

He told you exactly what he needed...space, room to breath, time to adjust and feel his way through to find out if you were the place he belonged. You refused to give him what he needed and he didn't have the resources to deal with the way you handled his requests.
Just a case of, it was not meant to be. He gave you something you needed, it's your responsibility to figure our what that was and use it to make sure your in a better place next time and have the emotional ability to respect another's needs. Someone telling you what they need shouldn't send you into a frenzy, unless your already starving and looking to him to feed you.

Think about that...if you were comfortable in your own rights and happy with or without someone you would have the ability to give them time and space to figure out what they needed.
If your not...you will freak out. You will feel the fear that your about to loose something you can't live without.

He's not the problem, your not taking care of your own needs and instead looking to someone else to come along to heal you. When someone tries to open up to you, the burden of your expectations are overwhelming.

The answer is to start learning how to feed yourself so your not starving. When someone comes along you'll be able to give a relationship the space to grow at a natural rate, and give it a chance to get off the ground.

posted April 14, 2015 02:56 AM            

Sometimes people bring us pain so that we can eventually learn we deserve more than that and seek joy. Everything in the above tells me that you were incompatible at a basic level, and problems started immediately. I'm so sorry it's left you confused and in pain. Perhaps the greater lesson is to dip rather than dive; take things more cautiously rather than plunging so quickly. From what you've said, the signs of his casual involvement were there from the beginning. Often, we don't want to see them until they are unavoidable.

I do wish he'd been more mature and disengaged from the relationship (if that's what it was) much sooner than ignore daily, all-day texts, for several months. Wow.

posted April 14, 2015 05:25 AM            

One day I met someone that REALLY opened my eyes to my inner demons but instead of vanishing, he is standing firm and asking ME to do the job while he quietly supports me in the background. I must say it is the hardest work I have ever done and I cry a lot out of sheer frustration with myself but I think it's worth it.

posted April 14, 2015 08:15 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aubyanne:
Yan,

Sometimes people bring us pain so that we can eventually learn we deserve more than that and seek joy. Everything in the above tells me that you were incompatible at a basic level, and problems started immediately. I'm so sorry it's left you confused and in pain. Perhaps the greater lesson is to dip rather than dive; take things more cautiously rather than plunging so quickly. From what you've said, the signs of his casual involvement were there from the beginning. Often, we don't want to see them until they are unavoidable.

I do wish he'd been more mature and disengaged from the relationship (if that's what it was) much sooner than ignore daily, all-day texts, for several months. Wow.

:: hugs ::

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As for aspects Yan, you might have been told already somewhere but it's your Sun-Pluto opposition/conjunction that triggered the extreame obsession. His Karma conj. your SN.

posted April 14, 2015 08:35 AM            

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posted April 14, 2015 08:37 AM              

quote:

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Originally posted by midnightvenus:
After the father thing was mentioned, I think that maybe you feel like letting go of him is like letting go of your father.
I think I'm where you were, except nothing happened yet between me and the guy.
He has Moon in Gemini, like my father, falling on my 2H.
I don't feel anything towards my father, love or hate, but I do feel the abandonment. I haven't seen him since I was 11.
Maybe that's what keeps me hung up on the guy.
In my case, I avoid contacting the guy.
Lately he's been the one contacting me periodically, from months to months.

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Wow two thumbs up for this.

I never thought of it like that, but that could be an unconscious motive behind it.

posted April 14, 2015 08:38 AM              

quote:

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Originally posted by Ami Anne:
I didn't even look at the chart but it sounds like a strong Chiron relationship.

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posted April 14, 2015 08:39 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Ami Anne:
I didn't even look at the chart but it sounds like a strong Chiron relationship.

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posted April 14, 2015 08:43 AM              

quote:

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Originally posted by astra7:
As for aspects Yan, you might have been told already somewhere but it's your Sun-Pluto opposition/conjunction that triggered the extreame obsession. His Karma conj. your SN.

[/B]

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So does that mean he came into my life so I can settle a karmic debt from a past life?

Does this have any significance?:

I met him right before Transit Saturn entered Scorpio.

At the time, TSaturn was on my 5th house cusp entering my 6th house.

We ended right before TSaturn was finishing up its transit in Scorpio.

When TSaturn entered Sagittarius, it was hovering on my 7th house cusp.

Now TSaturn is transiting my 7th house (ruled by Scorpio), conjunct my mars and North Node in Sagittarius.

posted April 14, 2015 08:45 AM              

quote:

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Originally posted by midnightvenus:
Edit: Wait, I got it wrong. His Mars-Chiron conjunction trines her Pluto, not her Mars-NN conjunction. The fact that she has this conjunction is interesting though.

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So he definitely was a catalyst for healing.. I assume with mars-chiron conjunction trine my Pluto.

posted April 14, 2015 08:50 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Yanmorg:
Wow two thumbs up for this.

I never thought of it like that, but that could be an unconscious motive behind it.

You're in a better position than I am. At least he still tries to contact you. Haha.

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posted April 14, 2015 09:00 AM              

quote:

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Originally posted by midnightvenus:
I think you feel like he owes you, like your father does, even though you're over their abandonment/absense.
His Mars-Chiron conjunction on your 2H could have triggered your fear of losing >something<
His Karma touches your ASC and your Mars-NN conjunction.
This seems to show that he was supposed to be a lesson for you.
You have to do your homework (which involves learning about the whys and hows we're talking about right now)

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Thank you for further elaborating..

I've already looked into it a bit, but I'm not nearly advanced enough to conduct a karmic analysis. I'm still a beginner who just so happens to grasp a lot of astrological concepts fairly quickly which helps with the big picture.

You guys notice every little detail that I would probably overlook wvery time if I was trying to interpret charts.

I am willing to learn and I continue to seek knowledge every day.

Where do you suggest I start? Any articles or professional Astrologers you would recomment that has a good grasp on karmic astrology?

posted April 14, 2015 09:08 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Yanmorg:
So does that mean he came into my life so I can settle a karmic debt from a past life?

Does this have any significance?:

I met him right before Transit Saturn entered Scorpio.

At the time, TSaturn was on my 5th house cusp entering my 6th house.

We ended right before TSaturn was finishing up its transit in Scorpio.

When TSaturn entered Sagittarius, it was hovering on my 7th house cusp.

Now TSaturn is transiting my 7th house (ruled by Scorpio), conjunct my mars and North Node in Sagittarius.

Aries rules my 12th house which is the focus here. Interesting.

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ETA: On a more positive side of tSaturn in 7th H..... If you work on this issue, may be learning to go slow at the beginning of the relationship etc.... by the time Saturn leaves your 7th H, Satur will leave you a gift by bringing more healthy relationship in your life. Of course, it all depends on what's happening with the rest of the chart, progression etc.... but generally that is the case. If it doesn't bring a new person, at least you worked hard on the relationship issues and you will have a healthier attitude/idea about relationship.

posted April 14, 2015 09:18 AM              

quote:

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Originally posted by Gabby:
Talk to your dad, pour your heart out...let him know how you feel. When you do this you will realize the feelings you have regarding this relationship are displaced.
Your pain and hurt belongs to the relationship with your father but your afraid to express it to him so those emotions get invested into your relationship.

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Me and my father have excellent communication. I was never afraid to confront him about my emotions. He actually forces it out of ke because he always knows when something's wrong with me.

Now, I have poured my heart out before but I didn't say anything or do anything that my father didn't already predict.

My dad isn't a perfect man, but he's an honest man. With himself and others. He actually said I have some abandonment issues because of him. The issues come in when he thinks he can solve all (not literally all) my problems through a cellphone.

I do feel angry sometimes when my father adopts his philosophical view on how I should view his absence. Sometimes you just can't heal someone with all that philosophical, higher learning talk. My father is a Sagittarius so I get his optimism, but sometimes it's hurtful. He disconnects from his emotions and looks at every situation with an objective point of view which drives me nuts because meanwhile, I have all of this emotions bottled up that are hard to express. Now don't get me wrong, he's very much in touch with his deepest emotions. My guess is, my dad just tries to help me with my issues by trying to make me look at the situation differently..

Isn't it weird that my father is a Sagittarius and My mother is a Gemini?