posted May 19, 2015 04:46 PM            

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Originally posted by FireandSpiritandDew:
I like the idea of relationships being a means of growth, but also, in the long-term, part of the point of a relationship is to support you in getting on with your own life. If you have billions of really amazing and breath-taking aspects then I could imagine that it might end up being a bit of a distraction from other important stuff, like work.

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posted May 19, 2015 04:53 PM            

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Originally posted by Astro keen:
Gabby, that you know three guys is cool. Great to have a choice!

The guy I know falls in the great synastry category, exactly as you described it. I think these guys are a test of some sort. They demonstrate that your own perceptions are more important than astrology. That you need to stay grounded and fully aware if you are getting what you deserve and desire.

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posted May 19, 2015 05:19 PM            

It's also hard to rely on synastry alone when there's so many real life factors that can't be accurately depicted in a chart. How a person looks, sounds, feels and tastes can weigh in on a decision. What if you don't like their friends or family and vice versa? What if they chew with their mouth open and you bite your fingernails? The charts can only take us so far.

posted May 19, 2015 06:04 PM            

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Originally posted by Gabby:
Lol...you mean you'd never get out of the bedroom?? Lol

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Well... Pluto-Venus square dw... I mean there were other things that we liked to do together, but somehow never quite as much

Even with other (more balanced!) aspects, though, I can imagine being so fascinated and drawn by someone that you don't invest in friends and career and your home and so on, and I don't think that the best relationship in the world would make up for the lack of them. And you might end up over-reliant on them.

posted May 20, 2015 03:00 AM            

Hard aspects can be hard work, they force us to put effort into things and they are dynamic and exciting. Having to work hard for something often makes us value it all the more. Too many hard aspects will wear us out though. They create tension.

The thing with hard aspects is they make us feel very motivated to DO something. It's like a compulsion. We want to get our point across very badly.

Soft aspects and flowing and easy, they show harmony and agreement between people. The awesome thing about soft aspects is we can just relax around these people, and don't have to constantly defend our point of view to them. The get us, and we can naturally feel comfortable and free around them.

A mixture of free flowing joy with tension and excitement seems to be what works best. It's rare to find a synastry that is only soft or hard anyway.

Actually, I rather like certain soft aspects, and am very attracted to them. Soft aspects to my 7th house ruler conjunct my ASc really generate a lot of chemistry with me. I just love it. Same thing with soft aspects to my Venus. I fall in love with that sort of thing.

posted May 20, 2015 08:00 AM            

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Originally posted by margym0o:
Well I guess like they say the natal chart of an individual (which then comes together as synastry etc.) is ultimately a chart of possibilities so it's wise to take into account progressions etc. to get a full picture of why something is/is not working. Of course, there's always free will too.

It's also hard to rely on synastry alone when there's so many real life factors that can't be accurately depicted in a chart. How a person looks, sounds, feels and tastes can weigh in on a decision. What if you don't like their friends or family and vice versa? What if they chew with their mouth open and you bite your fingernails? The charts can only take us so far.

If there is a mutual attraction and things between you fall in line AND you have great synastry? Well that's just super

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posted May 20, 2015 08:00 AM            

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Originally posted by FireandSpiritandDew:
Well... Pluto-Venus square dw... I mean there were other things that we liked to do together, but somehow never quite as much

Even with other (more balanced!) aspects, though, I can imagine being so fascinated and drawn by someone that you don't invest in friends and career and your home and so on, and I don't think that the best relationship in the world would make up for the lack of them. And you might end up over-reliant on them.

Besides, at my point of old-age, I'd probably prefer someone who made up his mind and did what he said he would over The Best Composite In The World...

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posted May 20, 2015 08:10 AM            

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Originally posted by Lotis White:
I think the best synastries are the ones that have a mixture of ease and challenge to them. That is, a mixture of hard and soft aspects.

Hard aspects can be hard work, they force us to put effort into things and they are dynamic and exciting. Having to work hard for something often makes us value it all the more. Too many hard aspects will wear us out though. They create tension.

The thing with hard aspects is they make us feel very motivated to DO something. It's like a compulsion. We want to get our point across very badly.

Soft aspects and flowing and easy, they show harmony and agreement between people. The awesome thing about soft aspects is we can just relax around these people, and don't have to constantly defend our point of view to them. The get us, and we can naturally feel comfortable and free around them.

A mixture of free flowing joy with tension and excitement seems to be what works best. It's rare to find a synastry that is only soft or hard anyway.

Actually, I rather like certain soft aspects, and am very attracted to them. Soft aspects to my 7th house ruler conjunct my ASc really generate a lot of chemistry with me. I just love it. Same thing with soft aspects to my Venus. I fall in love with that sort of thing.

However, I agree that a synastry completely lacking in hard aspects would be boring. Also, I'm a feminine Sun/Moon combo (Sun in Cap, Moon in Cancer) and I tend to be very attracted to masculine Sun signs... Like Sag and Aries (These signs harmonize with my Fire Asc, Mercury, Venus, and Mars). I certainly wouldn't go for the male version of myself, I want someone a bit opposite.

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That's makes a lot of sense and made me think about what aspects are hard versus soft in these different synasties, with these 3 guys.

The one that is really pushing forward we have a lot of beautiful soft aspects to Saturn AC, Sun, Merc...our hard aspects are Moon square Moon and Pluto square Mars, DW Uranus square Mars...plus his Saturn is on my DC...probably why it's taken so long to get together but he's not giving up.
The list of aspects is very long with this guy we touch each other's charts all over the place

posted May 20, 2015 10:39 AM            

So, I'm always a bit weary about putting too much into the synastry alone. You have to go with what you feel.

Of course I'll just sit back and wait to be told that I'm delusional. LOL.

posted May 20, 2015 10:48 AM            

I'm starting to believe that your natal chart is everything you need to know.

You'll lived your natal chart regarless.

Just my 2 cents.

posted May 20, 2015 10:49 AM            

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Originally posted by LucieLemonade:

Of course I'll just sit back and wait to be told that I'm delusional. LOL.

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That's kind of a bad joke in the context of what happened here lately. Because when you are delusional, all you can pray for is to be surrounded by people who tell you so or help you see it. Most people don't give a **** , they just think it (she's delusional) and then go on with their lives. And some of them will even use your delusional moments for some personal benefit, such as a little refreshment ego trip.

Gabby, do you still want one of these threads to be closed?

posted May 20, 2015 11:03 AM            

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Originally posted by LeeLoo2014:
That's kind of a bad joke in the context of what happened here lately. Because when you are delusional, all you can pray for is to be surrounded by people who tell you so or help you see it. Most people don't give a **** , they just think it (she's delusional) and then go on with their lives. And some of them will even use your delusional moments for some personal benefit, such as a little refreshment ego trip.

Gabby, do you still want one of these threads to be closed?

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I guess not, they both took on a life of their own, lol!!
Thank you though!
I like the way we all play a roll together in helping ppl. I noticed ppl getting onto you about being harsh...don't let that get to you. Your way is one of many ways that's needed in order to help some. My way may be much more gentle, maybe to gentle at times... doesn't mean one way is right or one way is wrong...they are just differnt. Ppl need both at different times and sometimes your way is going to be exactly what they need, sometimes another way will fit best. I just wanted you to know that I appreciate your ways!

posted May 20, 2015 11:05 AM            

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Originally posted by LucieLemonade:
My x husband and I had meh synastry but we had a great relationship.

So, I'm always a bit weary about putting too much into the synastry alone. You have to go with what you feel.

Of course I'll just sit back and wait to be told that I'm delusional. LOL.

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posted May 20, 2015 11:12 AM            

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Originally posted by Gabby:
I guess not, they both took on a life of their own, lol!!
Thank you though!
I like the way we all play a roll together in helping ppl. I noticed ppl getting onto you about being harsh...don't let that get to you. Your way is one of many ways that's needed in order to help some. My way may be much more gentle, maybe to gentle at times... doesn't mean one way is right or one way is wrong...they are just differnt. Ppl need both at different times and sometimes your way is going to be exactly what they need, sometimes another way will fit best. I just wanted you to know that I appreciate your ways!

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Thank you, Gabby, I really appreciate this, you being aware of it and also writing it! It means a lot to me, especially coming from you
I also wanted to tell you something, how much I appreciate what you do, in relation to the asteroid thread you linked today, but I will do it on that thread.

posted May 20, 2015 11:21 AM            

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Originally posted by LeeLoo2014:
Thank you, Gabby, I really appreciate this, you being aware of it and also writing it! It means a lot to me, especially coming from you
I also wanted to tell you something, how much I appreciate what you do, in relation to the asteroid thread you linked today, but I will do it on that thread.

I thought the same that both threads became interesting and it would be a shame to close any of them.

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posted May 20, 2015 12:55 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by LeeLoo2014:
That's kind of a bad joke in the context of what happened here lately. Because when you are delusional, all you can pray for is to be surrounded by people who tell you so or help you see it. Most people don't give a **** , they just think it (she's delusional) and then go on with their lives. And some of them will even use your delusional moments for some personal benefit, such as a little refreshment ego trip.

Gabby, do you still want one of these threads to be closed?

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I don't know what's happened on here lately. I do know that some people truly believe that X aspect/placement, etc can ONLY bring bad things and Y mean only good things.

This I do not believe and I don't believe it because I've lived these "terrible horrible relationship killing obsession creating anger inducing, etc" aspects and placements and they were not at all the case.

posted May 20, 2015 01:29 PM            

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Originally posted by LucieLemonade:

I don't know what's happened on here lately. I do know that some people truly believe that X aspect/placement, etc can ONLY bring bad things and Y mean only good things.

This I do not believe and I don't believe it because I've lived these "terrible horrible relationship killing obsession creating anger inducing, etc" aspects and placements and they were not at all the case.

I was really clued in with that thread about high & low vibrations. That thread rocked my world! It was like a light bulb moment.

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