Posts: 88
From:
Registered: Nov 2012

posted November 03, 2012 09:12 PM            

---

In my experience this is a really bad aspect between couples. The venus person sees the neptune person with rose colored glasses and they can do no wrong. I knew two friends with this aspect. It was her neptune and his venus. No matter what horrible things she did to him or how uncomfortable a position she would put him in, no matter how many times she lied to him he saw her as "helping" him even when that clearly was not her intent.

I also had this aspect before with someone. I was venus. I saw him as the perfect man. It was really difficult for me to believe and accept that he just wanted to have a fling with me and nothing more even when the signs he didn't want anything serious with me were clearly there in retrospect.

IP: Logged

Posts: 54748
From: Saturn next to Charmaine
Registered: Apr 2009

posted November 04, 2012 12:18 AM            

---

Welcome!

------------------
"Never mentally imagine for another that which you would not want to experience for yourself, since the mental image you send out inevitably comes back to you." Rebecca Clark

IP: Logged

Posts: 4410
From: nevada
Registered: Apr 2009

posted November 04, 2012 10:11 AM            

---

Hello Mandy pie! Welcome to LL

------------------

"For all those who believe, expect a miracle.”
Linda Goodman 1925-1995

IP: Logged

Posts: 2375
From: CO, USA
Registered: Apr 2012

posted November 04, 2012 11:30 AM            

---

Yes, hard Neptune aspects in general are quite difficult to deal with in synastry and in composite.

Hard Venus-Neptune is especially troublesome because the Venus person is usually seeing things through those rose colored glasses and trapped in the Neptune person's fog. Sometimes the Neptune person is either malicious about it or too guilty to tell the truth. It depends on other aspects. But whether they want to face it or not, this relationship will have a definite tendency to float into la-la-land and make someone get burned when the fantasy back drop falls away into the ugly, true background. Venus will feel like the love has died and Neptune will feel bitter that the truth has finally come to light. Usually when a Pluto-Venus transit happens it's possible that a couple with Neptune-Moon, -Venus or -Sun hard aspects will have some sort of revelation and things will definitely have to change.

IP: Logged

Posts: 471
From:
Registered: Oct 2012

posted November 04, 2012 11:50 AM            

---

Actually that aspect can work out in either direction. I was Neptune, he's Venus. I freely admit I idealize him somehow even though I try not to (half the time when I dream of him, he's wearing all-white, which should give you an idea of what I'm talking about here).

If anything the idea that he idealized me and put me on a pedestal is laughable to me because he was actually pretty negative where I was concerned and always made me feel like I wasn't enough and didn't measure up in some way (his Saturn opposes my Venus). He was always very verbally brusque with me, and critical. Ran off and had 'fun' with someone else and then decided to hook up with them long term, but every time I lay eyes on him I still damn near hear harps and see little twinkles and sparkles around his head. I freely admit I love him still in spite of all that, even to the point of stupidity. I don't even really trust him, I know he isn't trustworthy but I still feel what I can only describe as adoration for him. I tell him all the time that I love him. I also tell him I know he's a "h*e". Because it's true.

So no, the idea that Neptune is always the deceiver/illusion/wrongdoer, and that Venus is somehow the poor blinded victim isn't always the case.Then again I have Venus square Neptune natally so that might play into it.

You have to remember too that how things look from the outside to you or me may not be the truth of the dynamic between two people. You might see this guy and this girl interact and think she's the douchebag or the one doing the snowing and the actual backstory on them and the private dynamic between them could be totally different. Also, if you're personally interested in this guy for yourself that can color a person's perception too, because in general women tend to have a tendency to demonize any other female associated with a guy they're attracted to.

IP: Logged

Posts: 1499
From: USA
Registered: Apr 2009

posted November 04, 2012 05:58 PM            

---

Yeah, like Stacy Lewis said, it can go both ways. I had it with someone, and I was the Neptune, and I idealized him.

I think that's the cue with this aspect in opposition. One person, could be the Venus or the Neptune, is idealizing the other. It's not a mutual admiration society though; perhaps in Neptune conjunction, trine or sextile, it could be, but in opposition or square, no. Seems like a one way street.

IP: Logged

Posts: 814
From:
Registered: Jul 2010

posted November 07, 2012 10:56 PM            

---

Venus-Neptune in Synastry

Venus is the planet of beauty, pleasure, and harmony, and rules our one-on-one relationships. Neptune is the planet of fantasy, dreams, idealism and delusion.

When Venus meets Neptune in synastry, a soul connection is indicated. You probably met each other when you were looking for the relationship of your dreams. We all have an idea of our perfect match, our knight in shining armor with whom we will share a fairy-tale love story. When someone’s Neptune makes an aspect to your Venus, you feel as though your dreams have come true.
​
With this aspect comes the tendency to view each other in the best light possible. The little, or big, characteristics that would normally bother you about someone are glossed over in favor of their better qualities. The Venus person tends to project her fantasies onto the Neptune person, assigning him the qualities of her ideal match. The Neptune person may or may not actually possess these qualities, but tends to play along to please the Venus person.

When a Venus-Neptune aspect is found in synastry, the couple gets caught up in the other-worldliness and fantasy the relationship offers. This can cause major problems later on, as Neptune is bound to err in some way or another, which leads to disappointment on the part of the Venus person. Venus’ refusal to see Neptune for who he really is lends itself to self-defeating behavior; in reality, no one is perfect, so Neptune will eventually fall off the pedestal Venus holds him so highly upon.

Another danger of this aspect is outright deception. Yes, Neptune feels pressure to fulfill the fantasies of the Venus person. Like Venus, Neptune aims to please. This desire to keep Venus’ fantasy alive could lead Neptune to lie and deceive the Venus person. While on some level, Venus may feel something is not quite right, she subconsciously chooses to overlook these inconsistencies, thereby ignoring the truth to keep the dream alive. Usually, Venus eventually realizes Neptune is human, and he isn’t perfect, which can lead to disappointment and a broken heart.
​
Another manifestation of this aspect involves a victim-savior scenario. Venus may be drawn to Neptune because he needs “help”. Perhaps he is an alcoholic. Perhaps he is a drug addict. Perhaps he has unresolved issues from the past which he is dealing with. Neptune draws out Venus’ compassion and sensitivity, stimulating her desire to “save” him. This can be dangerous, as the relationship can become unhealthily co-dependent.
​
The preceding description is especially applicable to hard synastry aspects between Venus and Neptune. The harmonious aspects (sextile and trine) are less intense, and foster the positive characteristics of Venus-Neptune aspects such as compassion, forgiveness, and a feeling of unity.
http://astrolady.wix.com/astrolady#!venus-neptune-in-synastry-the-soul-mate-aspect/cps2

IP: Logged

Posts: 471
From:
Registered: Oct 2012

posted November 07, 2012 11:09 PM            

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Belage:
Yeah, like Stacy Lewis said, it can go both ways. I had it with someone, and I was the Neptune, and I idealized him.

I think that's the cue with this aspect in opposition. One person, could be the Venus or the Neptune, is idealizing the other. It's not a mutual admiration society though; perhaps in Neptune conjunction, trine or sextile, it could be, but in opposition or square, no. Seems like a one way street.

---

Exactly. Only one of them benefits, and it's definitely not the person doing the idealizing, overlooking faults, and rolling over hot coals butt naked for the other person...who doesn't even care LOL.

And fairy's post pretty much echoes my experiences to a tee which shows that it's not always the Venus person that plays the fool. Pretty much the *only* part of that description that applies to my ex, is how he somehow thought I was a damsel in distress and that it was his job to "save" me even though I'm fine and never asked for/needed/wanted the help. He has a weird idea of what "helping" is too that usually qualifies more as verbal and emotional abuse.

Even now based on things he's said since then, he doesn't view me accurately or clearly - instead he views me as some doomed, tragic figure that needs rescuing which is totally perplexing to me.

So it's this weird thing where even though on some level I know better, I wind up overlooking all his flaws and am just so besotted, while he's looking down his nose and sneering while musing that I'm some pathetic little free-falling waif or something.

IP: Logged

Posts: 69
From: Durham north carolina usa
Registered: May 2015

posted July 09, 2015 07:15 PM            

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Mandy pie:
In my experience this is a really bad aspect between couples. The venus person sees the neptune person with rose colored glasses and they can do no wrong. I knew two friends with this aspect. It was her neptune and his venus. No matter what horrible things she did to him or how uncomfortable a position she would put him in, no matter how many times she lied to him he saw her as "helping" him even when that clearly was not her intent.

I also had this aspect before with someone. I was venus. I saw him as the perfect man. It was really difficult for me to believe and accept that he just wanted to have a fling with me and nothing more even when the signs he didn't want anything serious with me were clearly there in retrospect.

---

I've had this both ways.
One guy, I worked with my neptunemployment opose his venus and he is very handsome, sweet, charming but I know he is a bad boy type. He plays girls comeing and going, he has hooked up with people that I know. He is always asking me to be with him but I couldn't even imagine going that route. I did promise him that if my current love didn't work out that I would see him but, I don't think I could ever do that.

The other guy I actually dated. His neptune opose my venus and my saturn conjunct his venus. I can say I was facinated by him but was in an on/off relationship with my current love. I knew he couldn't possibly see me as anything good , also caught on to somethings that was highly amusing. Men and thier games! Psh!!! So I played back.lol I'm sure he saw me as off in some ways but I saw him as the same. He just wanted to get laid in the beginning and that was easy to see, maybe he wanted to help me since I was going threw so much. I don't know whatever is my oppinion. We hung out alot as Saturn predicts we were a comfort to each other then he left without telling me goodbye. Dudes go figure??? Anyway, I just tried to feed his ego, looks like he needed it as much as I did. I do hope he is doing ok but, I'll never see him on certain levels again. I really have no patience for bs., I understand but seriously don't understand. I think it was all some crazy lie anyway, like he really should have just said, he I like you, your great but not for me. I'd already relized the that to begin with. Never hear from him anymore either, hmmmm wander why? Because I don't serve a pur purpose I'm sure?

IP: Logged

Posts: 54748
From: Saturn next to Charmaine
Registered: Apr 2009

posted July 09, 2015 08:08 PM            

---

Moving to Interpersonal Astrology.

IP: Logged

Posts: 13
From: Tiptree, United Kingdom
Registered: Dec 2014

posted July 10, 2015 05:57 AM            

---

Hi,

Sorry to hear about your Neptune story.

Interestingly, I have this with someone I would like to be in a relationship with-her Neptune at 28 Deg Scorpio is oposit my Venus at 26 Deg Torus. My Neptune in Capricorn also makes a square to her Sun in late Virgo.

Both of us have difficult Natal Neptune aspects-I have it on the 4th house cusp (square the Ascendant), it's my 7th house ruler and it squares my Juno in the first.

In her case she has an exact Juno/Neptune opposition (with Juno sitting in the 12th).

So, I'm guessing in a relationship, we'd potentially both deceive each other? lol.

------------------
The world is just, a great big onion... And hate & fear are the spices that make it fly.

IP: Logged