posted October 28, 2016 12:08 AM
Hey, guys! Greetings from Hollyweird. I'm back with more about That Guy.
After this very lengthy, complicated but largely disjointed mixed-message-filled back-and-forth, we've reopened the lines of communication, and are clearing the air with some very unexpected results. Our on-screen chemistry is off-the-charts, but I hadn't accounted for how much of that seems to be actual sexual energy between us. So, I considered a potential, but very casual, sexual component to our working relationship. And I may have been unintentionally, and unfairly, shortchanging what we have real potential to be.
Allow me to give a little backstory.
In 2012, I began developing my first TV property. It was with an old crush I'd largely moved beyond, though as it'd always been mutual, working together again brought all of the old feelings back. He's not one for intimacy, and we already had buckets of that, and being unable to combine a best friendship with sex left us disappointed, angry, and estranged, by mid 2013.
But he's still the best producing partner I'd ever had. It really wrecked me. Though I'd moved onto the project I'm soon going into production with now, I've stayed solo -- I kind of vowed to -- even though it does get extremely lonesome, and there's that part of me that yearns for a partner.
It was one of those things that smacked me in the face; I hadn't even considered it until it seemed obvious. I'd been getting the strange 'do-over' vibe from him since the beginning; it's as if he's the bizarre amalgam of every almost-success, and failure that occurred for foolish reasons. The ones on which you can only shake your head, because it feels like such a senseless loss with meaningless pain.
He felt like my last real shot. Like, somehow, together, we were going to do really amazing things, and make it work. That we'd be formidable on screen, good friends off-camera, and keep the sexual energy between us from detonating by enjoying an outlet. ALL of the things that I'd failed to achieve in the first relationship of its kind.
But, see, he wasn't only my costar; he was my producing partner, too. And I'd kind of sworn ... after him, there would be no others.
So, if you'd have a look? Things are slowly orienting in such a way to where we'll be having that conversation soon, and I'm stunned that I'm willing to even consider giving it another go. But it just ... feels so right to me. Hard to explain.
Anyhow, thank you! Sorry for the absences, but showrunners gotta showrun! I'm still here, though. I've just taken to lurking and pop in when I can.
SO. Once more, with feeling:
... I'll upload a composite in a bit, if anyone's particularly interested in that. Fortunately, his TOB is correct to the minute, just like mine. Booyah! Accuracy for the win!
Thanks, everyone.