Lindaland
  Interpersonal Astrology
  Commitment in synastry

Post New Topic  Post A Reply
profile | register | preferences | faq

UBBFriend: Email This Page to Someone! next newest topic | next oldest topic
Author Topic:   Commitment in synastry
alludeu
Knowflake

Posts: 135
From: Australia
Registered: Aug 2016

posted November 19, 2016 11:58 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for alludeu     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Are there any aspects in synastry that would make someone want to commit (more than usual).. If a person was typically someone not wanting to commit most of the time?

IP: Logged

Randall
Webmaster

Posts: 72761
From: Saturn next to Charmaine
Registered: Apr 2009

posted November 20, 2016 01:36 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Bump!

IP: Logged

Selenite
Knowflake

Posts: 1267
From: Lyra
Registered: Aug 2013

posted November 20, 2016 03:27 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Selenite     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
For me it's actually been a lack of Saturn. I don't think I have problems committing, but I also don't have a clear definition of commitment in the first place. If someone becomes demanding or starts placing ultimatums, I will feel trapped and like we're not compatible enough to just go with the flow. Like if we have to make the effort to restrict each other and it doesn't happen naturally then something isn't working, for me at least.

I've been with my boyfriend for a little over a year and we are both like this. We never talk about commitment or 'where we're going' because it just doesn't mean anything to either of us, and adds unnecessary pressure (also neither of us wants to get married ever).
There's no Saturn besides ours being squared and mine being trine his DSC. I have Saturn in the 7th trine Venus in Scorpio natally, and he has a grand Earth trine with Cap Rising and Mars in Cap. So I think we are both just 'responsible' in relationships and tend to stay until things don't work anymore.

There are a ton of easy aspects with Uranus so there is a sense of friendship that allows us to be separate individuals who always come back to each other. I'm not exaggerating when I say I slept at his place every night for 6 months when we first started dating, but that was super rare for both of us. We never really talked about why it was happening, although he did bring it up a couple times like an 'isn't this strange?' sort of thing. Normally both of us are the type of people who reaally need lots space (we both have moon square Uranus), but we just never felt burdened by the other so we can always be around each other.

I guess that's normal for healthy couples, lol. But in the past, all of my other relationships ended because I felt super restricted.. and now in the relationship where I'm with the other person almost constantly, I feel the most free. It's kooky

We have:
Saturn sq. Saturn (0)
Saturn trine DC (2)

Uranus trine Sun (3)
Uranus conjunct Sun (0)
Uranus trine Mercury (1)
Uranus conjunct Mercury (0)
Uranus trine Moon (0)
Uranus trine Moon (5)
Uranus conj. Mars (0)
Uranus trine AC (4)
Uranus sq. MC (4)

IP: Logged

margym0o
Knowflake

Posts: 800
From: Canada
Registered: Jul 2014

posted November 21, 2016 09:04 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for margym0o     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Selenite:
For me it's actually been a lack of Saturn. I don't think I have problems committing, but I also don't have a clear definition of commitment in the first place. If someone becomes demanding or starts placing ultimatums, I will feel trapped and like we're not compatible enough to just go with the flow. Like if we have to make the effort to restrict each other and it doesn't happen naturally then something isn't working, for me at least.

I've been with my boyfriend for a little over a year and we are both like this. We never talk about commitment or 'where we're going' because it just doesn't mean anything to either of us, and adds unnecessary pressure (also neither of us wants to get married ever).
There's no Saturn besides ours being squared and mine being trine his DSC. I have Saturn in the 7th trine Venus in Scorpio natally, and he has a grand Earth trine with Cap Rising and Mars in Cap. So I think we are both just 'responsible' in relationships and tend to stay until things don't work anymore.

There are a ton of easy aspects with Uranus so there is a sense of friendship that allows us to be separate individuals who always come back to each other. I'm not exaggerating when I say I slept at his place every night for 6 months when we first started dating, but that was super rare for both of us. We never really talked about why it was happening, although he did bring it up a couple times like an 'isn't this strange?' sort of thing. Normally both of us are the type of people who reaally need lots space (we both have moon square Uranus), but we just never felt burdened by the other so we can always be around each other.

I guess that's normal for healthy couples, lol. But in the past, all of my other relationships ended because I felt super restricted.. and now in the relationship where I'm with the other person almost constantly, I feel the most free. It's kooky

We have:
Saturn sq. Saturn (0)
Saturn trine DC (2)

Uranus trine Sun (3)
Uranus conjunct Sun (0)
Uranus trine Mercury (1)
Uranus conjunct Mercury (0)
Uranus trine Moon (0)
Uranus trine Moon (5)
Uranus conj. Mars (0)
Uranus trine AC (4)
Uranus sq. MC (4)


What is Saturn doing in your composite? That might provide some clues as well. Probably even moreso than your synastry, as the synastry is more your chemistry with each other and the composite is a snapshot of the relationship overall. The lack of Saturn in your synastry might explain why you don't "restrict" the other person in any way, yet if Saturn is active in your composite it might explain the relationship commitment (key word - relationship).

I am experiencing this right now - only minor Saturn contacts in synastry but Saturn is trine our Sun-Venus-Mercury stellium in our composite. It's been almost 3 years and we are very committed - for better or worse. To add to your point though, we are both very Saturnian by nature in our natals so this probably adds our own individual sense of seriousness towards the relationship as well.


IP: Logged

mir
Knowflake

Posts: 2555
From:
Registered: May 2009

posted November 21, 2016 02:15 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for mir     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
*** It's been almost 3 years and we are very committed - for better or worse.***

Same story here (1,5 year total).
Each (instinctively initiated) break-up seems to be triggered by the deep fear of loss (we both lost too many loved ones / parents etc.) and the need of reassurance might be out of proportion or unbearable to most but when both are familiar with it and able to 'unceasingly reassure', things will line up naturally again and again. It's really all about mutuality, having the same level of dedication, depth of feeling (despite the gap of expressing it ofcourse) and seeing and accepting each other's vulnerabilities (the latter is a BIG part of the love we have for each other and yea ofc. this has another more dark side triggering the fear, no black without white remember)

Hardly any Saturn in synastry;
only his Saturn (which hardly aspected in his own chart - he should be a commitment phobe with all that hard Uranus in chart) sextile my Mars but that's really IT all together (no minors either).

(^ not taking into account the declinations here in which my Saturn isn't doing 1 thing either)

Saturn/NN exactly conj in composite. On the compo Desc.

My saturn exactly square asc/merc & opp. Nept. Only the last couple a years I'm capable of true commitment - although enough space is a constante (and I'm 45 already, to not forget hehe).

IP: Logged

Selenite
Knowflake

Posts: 1267
From: Lyra
Registered: Aug 2013

posted November 21, 2016 02:16 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Selenite     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by margym0o:
What is Saturn doing in your composite? That might provide some clues as well. Probably even moreso than your synastry, as the synastry is more your chemistry with each other and the composite is a snapshot of the relationship overall. The lack of Saturn in your synastry might explain why you don't "restrict" the other person in any way, yet if Saturn is active in your composite it might explain the relationship commitment (key word - relationship).

I am experiencing this right now - only minor Saturn contacts in synastry but Saturn is trine our Sun-Venus-Mercury stellium in our composite. It's been almost 3 years and we are very committed - for better or worse. To add to your point though, we are both very Saturnian by nature in our natals so this probably adds our own individual sense of seriousness towards the relationship as well.


Hi That's so sweet that it's been 3 years, I'm happy for you This 1 year relationship is the longest either of us has had.. go figure.
Well let's see in the Composite, Saturn is conjunct Jupiter by 3 degrees in H3. It's quintile Mars (0), and semisquare Sun and Mercury, but that's it. However, the chart pattern is a strong kite formation so that probably adds some stability (And the sense that it 'just happened' without any extra work on our parts).

IP: Logged

mir
Knowflake

Posts: 2555
From:
Registered: May 2009

posted November 21, 2016 02:40 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for mir     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Now that I'm thinking about it....

All my past relationships clearly had (very) hard Saturn aspects in synastry. But there in fact, never was, such "mutuality" as I experience now (having only one saturn sextile syna wise).

IP: Logged

Randall
Webmaster

Posts: 72761
From: Saturn next to Charmaine
Registered: Apr 2009

posted November 29, 2016 11:48 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Good info!

IP: Logged

All times are Eastern Standard Time

next newest topic | next oldest topic

Administrative Options: Close Topic | Archive/Move | Delete Topic
Post New Topic  Post A Reply
Hop to:

Contact Us | Linda-Goodman.com

Copyright 2000-2016

Powered by Infopop www.infopop.com © 2000
Ultimate Bulletin Board 5.46a