posted January 02, 2017 02:57 AM            

I am attractive, educated, blah, blah blah, you know, all that stuff you've read before.

But I have never had a relationship and when I tell people this, they cant seem to believe it. Neither can I really. So, I am slowly learning to accept that I am meant to be alone in this lifetime.

Life is short, you feel like you blink and its over. Maybe my soulmate is in another dimension watching over me. If he is, he's not doing the best job!

So my question is, is there anything you can see in my natal chart that says that I am meant to be single in this lifetime?

I think it would give me some peace of mind knowing I am rather than hoping I will ever meet anyone.

posted January 02, 2017 06:18 AM            

But lets not confuse "lonesomeness" with "loneliness". Because the latter can be experienced even when in a relationship.

I notice that you have Saturn on your Asc/Sun/Mars and that Sun/Mars sit in the 10th

To others, you seem very independent, restrictive, serious and proud. So many assume you above all those "petty" things like romance,love and frivolity.

In fact, it could be that with Saturn so far up in the chart,you have had to work and develop a sober attitude towards life- so as to be seen and revered as an authority figure.

Your more sensitive nature is hiding in the 12th house- not seen by many but experienced very intimately by yourself.

So much so that if we were to consider the whole sign system, it would be in the 1st house-denoting someone who feels quite deeply and is a romantic at heart.

The thing is that with Saturn sitting on your Sun,Venus and Mars like that,you are quite tough to break into-well at-least that is the perception others have(Saturn squares the Asc too).

You seem to others so standoffish and austere that even those who would like to try, feel very much "out of their depth" etc.

No there is nothing that you can do with being you.But you can be made aware about how you come across to others and stop beating yourself up for about it and learn to work with it.

Saturn is dry and cold energy. And when it sextiles your Venus, squares your Sun and conjuncts your Mars like that, it suggests to me that you are a person who is not easily impressed.

It takes a while to warm your heart as you are not one to just "jump right in" and fall in-love.

You weigh your risks and are likely so picky with your suitors, that the pool is very small.

Figure out whether you want a lover that is all the things that you deem the "ideal". Or you can stand to love someone(within reason of-course) "as is".

Now this is not to say that you must "settle". But it does mean that you must be prepared to ask yourself questions like "Am I looking to love a perfect person?" or "Am I looking to perfect the way I love a person?"

Saturn can endow people with extraordinarily good looks(contrary to popular belief). But looks are not really the issue here when it comes to attracting.

There are many attractive/good-looking people who are single. So that is not really a factor-as much as people have been lead to belief.

The issue here is allowing a version of LOVE that is far removed from your "ideal" to come into your life.

The LOVE that nurtures, supports, protects, listens, guides,hugs and kisses you etc. But comes in a differing package from the one that you are expecting.

Increase your pool of suitors to cross colour lines. Extend your age bracket and rid yourself of unfounded views of "types" as no-one ever marries their "type" and after 50 years with that person, they even forget that they ever had one.

Consider all these things because I can honestly say that as a Saturn-Venus conjunct person,this is what I have had to learn myself.

I am super picky and can be turned off by the slightest deviation of character displays that are inconsistent with my "ideal".

But if one feels loved by the person, feels safe with them and protected. And most importantly,if you feel acknowledged, cherished and listened to,god dammit you should consider letting that person in.

Love is possible for you. But you may have to let go of the illusions of "how" it should come.

posted January 02, 2017 02:07 PM            

No. You can create anything you want. I can give you some clues. Where were you born?

quote:

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Originally posted by TaurusVenusGirl:

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posted January 02, 2017 02:45 PM            

I definitely don't submit to a 'type' as I've dated people from all backgrounds and different appearances. I am more attracted to personality, however, l don't take my time to get to know people and need them to approach me and persevere but most men give up easy and aren't interested in cracking my hard shell.

I get that standoffish thing. I've had people who've presumed I'm in a relationship just because I am so standoffish!!

I am also disinterested in putting myself out there. I don't enjoy going to bars and clubs to meet people. I go to work then home and enjoy the occasional trip to the beach or hike. I do expect that I should be able to stay home on a Saturday night and at around 8.30pm my soulmate knocks on the door and says 'Baby, I'm the one' which will never happen.

I've just always been like, if it's meant to happen it will. If I'm meant to meet someone the universe will push us together.

I've been working with my Kinesiologist (Energetic Healer) on meeting a partner. We used a goal and put it on line. My goal was to 'I now enjoy an intimate,loving, long-term, committed and respectful relationship with a male lover who I am also best friends with'

And voila! He walked into my life, but as a married man. So I think my goal came into fruition, but as he was married I just think the universe was just trying to tell me 'Well here he is, but you can't have him, as you are meant to be alone'

posted January 02, 2017 11:43 PM            

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Originally posted by TaurusVenusGirl:
I was born in Perth, Western Australia.

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posted January 03, 2017 08:32 AM            

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posted January 03, 2017 11:48 AM            

@TaurusVenusGirl,
First thing that popped out to me was Saturn squares. And that conjunction on Mars. Saturn squares are a b#@%#.
I have those, and I can be pretty frigid too. And ofc, I don't want to be that way. But a lot of what you said resonated.

You also have moon in 12th. The cliche of clandestine affairs does play out in real life, doesn't it? All I want to tell you about this particular problem - is that you deserve to be a part of someone's *real* life. You deserve to play a role that's visible to others. Don't sell yourself short by being in the shadows and being okay with it. Coz that's what the 12th House finds most comfortable.

Secondly, about Saturnian hang-ups. One way - that has sometimes worked for me - is to adopt the opposite point of view. That comes naturally to us anyway when we ponder about a situation - but I mean, really embrace it. *Imagine* you are someone without any hang-ups or inhibitions and play out that fantasy (your 12H moon will eat that up). Once you get past that FIRST barrier of *allowing* human intimacy to develop, those hang-ups will melt away on their own, one by one. You'll be forced into a new perspective and some things that you thought you absolutely couldn't live with, you'll find tolerable, even endearing. Or some things you thought you couldn't live without, you won't even miss.

^ Because getting over that first hurdle allows feelings to take root. And those are truer reflections of who we are and what we want. 12H moon feelings are nebulous at best, and even we don't know the extent of our feelings at times. So if you set the stage like this - pushing past gate 1 - those feelings will suddenly be clearer than ever. Whether it's a "yes, I did the right thing" or "Oh he is SO not the guy" - either way, you'll have a better perspective of the whole thing.

posted January 03, 2017 02:58 PM            

I've developed an original method which uses Western and Chinese astrology to scan for resonant prospective mates. My scan for you told me that you are VERY selective regarding intimate partner.

First, look at your own chart, goals and motives. Are you actually searching for a lifemate? If so, it may be helpful to make it a priority.

Until you make up your mind, I'm reluctant to invest any more time and energy in helping you without a clear direction and intention statement from you.

quote:

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Originally posted by TaurusVenusGirl:
Sure comdoc, but not sure how that's supposed to help me?

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posted January 03, 2017 07:00 PM            

Elysia: "You also have moon in 12th. The cliche of clandestine affairs does play out in real life, doesn't it?" I like to be low key in my relationships. I dont want to be showed off or have others show me off either.

"Where's the moon. A 12H one needs a LOT of coaxing to let those waters out." This totally speaks to me!

posted January 03, 2017 07:19 PM            

I dont know what to say really.

Maybe there's a higher life plan for me than just "Romantic Love" which everyone seems to focus on so much.

I think I will get a dog and give him a mans name, like Greg or Derrick and call him "My Partner" instead of "My dog", I know he will be very loyal to me at least and not cheat on me

I dont know anymore about "looking for something" If something is meant to be, it will be. The universe will realign to bring people together if they're meant to be, you just cant force it.

posted January 04, 2017 03:51 AM            

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Originally posted by TaurusVenusGirl:
Hi Beautiful_Light, how do I check my solar returns, and what do I need to look out for?

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posted January 04, 2017 04:13 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by TaurusVenusGirl:
Thank you everyone for your advice and feedback so far.

I dont know what to say really.

Maybe there's a higher life plan for me than just "Romantic Love" which everyone seems to focus on so much.

I think I will get a dog and give him a mans name, like Greg or Derrick and call him "My Partner" instead of "My dog", I know he will be very loyal to me at least and not cheat on me

I dont know anymore about "looking for something" If something is meant to be, it will be. The universe will realign to bring people together if they're meant to be, you just cant force it.

I am who I am, and I cant change me.

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Dear VenusGirl,
Consider this: if you get a dog or other pet, you run the risk of pouring 100% of your emotional reserves into the pet and leaving none for a possible relationship with a human male.

What disturbs me more in your last post, however, is the last sentence. "Can't" is possibly the most dangerous word in the English language. As long as you believe you "can't," then you most likely won't. If you believe, instead, that you "can," then you will.

My advice; hustle down to your local used bookstore and find a copy of The Holy Scriptures. Christians have their own version and usually call it, The Bible.

Turn immediately to the Book of Psalms. If you don't like the words, "Lord" and "God," substitute one of the other names that the ancient Hebrews used to describe their deity. Your deity cares more about you than any birthchart will ever reveal.

Begin by reading the 23rd Psalm. Read it everyday until you can recite it without looking at the page.

My dear sister offered the above advice 25 years ago and became my #1 Life Hero because of it.

Yes, VenusGirl, there most certainly is a higher life plan, but no astrologer's ever going to be able to tell you what it is.

posted January 04, 2017 05:34 PM            

But hey I think you will meet someone at your job

posted January 04, 2017 08:00 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by next to neptune:
I dont see why you should be single for your whole life?

But hey I think you will meet someone at your job

7th house ruler is in the 8th house - and the 8th house ruler is in the 6th Maybe you should just focus on having a lover (maybe at the job?) instead of getting married

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next to neptune: Lol! I am a Licenced Massage Therapist. In Australia, if a massage a patient, and we want to date, I will have to stop treating him, then wait 2 years after the last session to date them or risk loosing my licence. And Its also pretty unethical as a Kinesiologist to date clients.

posted January 04, 2017 08:04 PM            

When I say I "can't", If my life purpose is beyond having a relationship, changing it "can't" help.

I just have to learn to let things go.