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Author
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Topic: Why was my older brother abusive toward me when I was a child?
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Lalafortunaea
Knowflake Posts: 142
From:
Registered: Jul 2017
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posted September 21, 2017 10:17 PM
  
I'm wondering if there's anything in our synastry that could possibly explain abuse between siblings? Or why one would feel the need to be so? I don't just mean occasional fist fights or normal sibling fights. I mean actual severe beatings, gaslighting, lying to everyone around me, my family, my friends, controlling everyone's behavior and turning people against me, sabotaging me no matter what I did, humiliation and ridicule. I did not do the same as him, though, being quite small, I still did fight back when he would beat me, but I didn't possess the same malevolent mind or intent on psychological and physical abuse and subterfuge. So, what would indicate this?
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Randall
Webmaster Posts: 85803
From: From a galaxy, far, far away...
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted September 22, 2017 12:26 PM
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hearttreasure
Knowflake Posts: 777
From:
Registered: Jan 2015
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posted September 22, 2017 01:17 PM
Which one are you?Are your parents treating both of you equal? Or you get more attention than your brother? Are you the only sibling he did that to you or to others too? IP: Logged |
Lalafortunaea
Knowflake Posts: 142
From:
Registered: Jul 2017
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posted September 22, 2017 02:50 PM
quote:
Originally posted by hearttreasure:
Which one are you?Are your parents treating both of you equal? Or you get more attention than your brother? Are you the only sibling he did that to you or to others too?
Sorry, I should have made that clear. I am on the outside. And this was many years ago. Nowadays, we barely speak or interact with each other, or see each other. He was mostly like that with me, and not my other siblings. I am/was the youngest so it was easy for him to shape everyone's view about me as a liar if I complained. As for treatment - well, it wasn't always peachy but he was just simply easily swayed early on by bad opinions and substances. I wouldn't say I got more attention. If anything he spent a lot of time isolating me. I'd say my eldest got the most attention. I didn't come from a family into crime or deviancy, but he displayed a desire to seek out those areas of life, and was nearly taken away in his mid teens for his bad behavior. IP: Logged |
GrandFireT
Knowflake Posts: 190
From: Out There
Registered: Dec 2016
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posted September 23, 2017 05:57 PM
In asking if you got more attention than your brother, Hearttreasure seems to be hinting of jealousy as a possible explanation for your brothers bad treatment of you.Often times the youngest (or younger of two) has to face up to this reality, especially in early years. Some sources, including the Holy Scriptures, talk of jealousy as one of most wicked conditions of the human mind. It can be touched off by the most irrational and seemingly insignificant detail. IP: Logged |
Lalafortunaea
Knowflake Posts: 142
From:
Registered: Jul 2017
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posted September 23, 2017 06:28 PM
quote:
Originally posted by GrandFireT:
In asking if you got more attention than your brother, Hearttreasure seems to be hinting of jealousy as a possible explanation for your brothers bad treatment of you.Often times the youngest (or younger of two) has to face up to this reality, especially in early years. Some sources, including the Holy Scriptures, talk of jealousy as one of most wicked conditions of the human mind. It can be touched off by the most irrational and seemingly insignificant detail.
Like I said, my eldest got the most. But me personally, no, I did not get more than him. In general he did get a lot, a lot more than I did, even. And I hear you. Jealousy is a horrible green eyed monster. But the thing is, everyone has jealous moments. It doesn't mean we're all going to act the same about it.
And to be a bit clearer - I do understand that siblings together can get rowdy, and fight and such, but through it all they're still siblings and it's all just part and partial of the whole sibling gig. The way my brother treated me was in no way normal, in my eyes. He was very cunning, very skilled at lying and controlling essentially anyone, and very charming as well. However, as soon as he was alone with me, when no one was looking, that's when he'd let it all out.
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hearttreasure
Knowflake Posts: 777
From:
Registered: Jan 2015
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posted September 26, 2017 05:37 PM
I'm not very skilled on synastry thing as I am the type of comparing the two person energy (looking at each other natal chart) if problems occured not making it in one plate like synastry unless it is a cooperative relationship. I'm sorry if this is not very helpful. 
I also have a bad experience with mars in Aquarius, my best friend in high school. I have venus in Pisces. She likes to bully me in a fun way, at first I find it funny too but not so much after some times. She gets too far with it but doesn't see how insensitive her actions are even when I try to say it's not nice.
The thing with air mars is, IF they have anger issues, they are very cold, insensitive, unemotional, and WILL hurt you with words or intellectually switch the scene. They like to do this to people who they think are dumb or weak, meaning: emotional and sensitive people who look like can't stand for themselves. Libra moon likes balance life. Maybe he sees you as the one who make his/family life or certain situations unbalance and his angry mars looks insensitive to you as you have moon in Pisces. His sun also has given him a cold nature which different with yours. His moon conjunct Pluto (is it?) makes him having extreme emotions to achieve balance life, and I don't know what terms he has about it. Maybe you need to have an open communication to him so your wounded heart can be healed. IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 72070
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted September 26, 2017 07:09 PM
He could have tried to shock you. He could have treated you in a way that you felt unsafe.------------------
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manderin
Knowflake Posts: 547
From: New York, NY USA
Registered: Nov 2013
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posted September 27, 2017 03:13 PM
Your Rahu is conjunct his mars. (Rahu is the Vedic name for the North Node... but I'm using vedic principles here anyway.) Rahu exacerbates the malefic properties of mars. Mars is our aggression and here your Rahu is exaggerating and exacerbating his aggressive nature. Add to this the fact that he has Saturn conjunct Moon which can make a person prone to depressive thoughts and darker thoughts. Because your rahu is close to his mars he was probably more aggressive around you than with others. He may have even set aside time in his life specifically to make you miserable since Rahu has an obsessive quality to it. So he may have had a slight obsession or pre-occupation with being aggressive or abusive towards you. This is not your fault as these energies work subconsciously. Quite simply something about you and he didn't even really know what (It was Rahu) ignites his anger and aggression (mars). This is a combination that Vedic astrology generally frowns upon in relationships because they can potentially become physically violent. It's not generally good to be around someone who's mars sits on your rahu. I don't think you should re-establish a close bond with your brother unless he becomes spiritually mature enough to handle this malefic energy within him. IP: Logged |
Melinn
Knowflake Posts: 66
From: Sweden
Registered: Jul 2017
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posted September 28, 2017 01:50 PM
So interesting. My almost 2 years younger brother has Mars in Aries 12 degrees from my n.node, too wide I know.As I have Venus in Aries we get along well WHEN we are relaxed and just having fun. The same sence of humor etc. But When he reached his twenties he started to become more frustrated because of different reasons and he usually took that out on me and my mother. Aries Mars you do the math! In his defence (and mine) our mother is a rage monster and becomes completely hysterical and we have learned from her that when you are stressed, angry, unhappy, sad, you lash out to your family and take out all that neg energy on them. She is still doing it and she is in need of theraphy. He either throw around and brook things like tables, chair etc. Or he sometimes attacked me. BUT never full on strong, so he never hurt me, but the energy itself made me feel violated and very hurt.
He has now settled down since he married. IP: Logged | |
Lindaland
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