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Author Topic:   composite of abuse?
cherryann
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posted July 10, 2018 05:45 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for cherryann     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
hey all

this is the composite with a very significant man in my life
it looks a bit rough and i'm so curious what you will say about this i learn so much from this forum!

the only nice aspect is moon trine venus the rest of it looks...i don't know scary
we have mars square pluto and mercury opposite mars
moon in the 8th but in conjunction to saturn and uranus

is it moon conjunct saturn who glues us together? we are not together physically but on a mental level we can't let each other go
or is it just mars square pluto and the passion that unions us?

now jupiter transits our dc and is in the 7th house can this transit mark a reunion? also transit pluto squares the composite north node and conjunct composite mars

what do you think about this transits?

is it in any way possible that this composite shows a good relationship? which kind of relationship is this? an abusive relationship with on and off tendencies and sex is the instrument to not kill each other?

so aprecciating your comments i look at this chart for 2 years now and can't understand


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LunaIscariot
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posted July 10, 2018 06:11 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for LunaIscariot     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Mars square the ASC/DSC axis with Pluto involved is definitely an indictor of abuse.
Mars is about conflict, aggression.
Pluto about control.
Mars square Pluto can mean the man in the relationship is very selfish and only interested in sex.
But usually just means both people have ego battles/struggles with each other. Itís like they are constantly irritated/competitive with each other but itís on a very subtle and psychological level since Pluto is involved. Usually a very destructive aspect to have in the composite, and even in synastry or natal.
The two people donít back down from each other, one is always battling for control or the upper hand and the two peoples egos donít blend well, so harmony is hard to come by. When they do fight, itís very intense or cruel/spiteful and just wants to win. Mars/Pluto doesnít compromise or have empathy. It goes for blood. So the nature of your arguments or any conflicts you have tend to have this ruthless quality that is very destructive to any relationship.
On the plus side, it usually leads to intense magnetic sexual attraction that is very passionate, maybe even BDSM or has a quality of domination or aggression to it. Some people really like this.

Mercury opp Mars can mean verbal arguments, or verbal abuse. You challenge each otherís opinions and ideas. On the plus side you are more verbally assertive and able to express yourself together and might think or talk quicker, Mars energizes mercury. But this can lead to being easily snappy or irritable towards each other too.
Since mercury/mars are the fastest planets, itís like impatience when talking to each other. One person might even cut the other person off when talking etc.
Again since mars is competitive, one person can try be the intellectual superior of the other. Or both.

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LunaIscariot
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posted July 10, 2018 06:37 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for LunaIscariot     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
The nice thing about this composite is that Venus (the ASC) ruler is happy in the 5th not afflicted at all making nice trines to the moon, Uranus and Neptune.
Sun and mercury conjunct the IC is also really nice. You two may spend a lot of time together at home or have a strong desire to ďnestĒ and live together or retreat from the world.

Moon is in the 8th (itís also the IC ruler) which shows deep emotions and lots of intimacy/bonding mainly through sex. Sex makes you too feel connected and triggers deep emotions.
But moon is conjunct Saturn and Uranus which isnít ideal, but since Saturn and Uranus are sort of the antithesis of each other, Saturn balances and stabilized the otherwise erratic, unstable and changeable energy of Uranus. So it works.

Mercury and mars are the main afflicted planets in this composite. Since neither make any harmonious aspects to other planets. Mercury rules the 2nd/6th houses and the 7th/12th. So these are the areas of life you two will really struggle agreeing or connecting on. So thatís values/money (2nd), lifestyle/health and daily habits or issues of neatness/cleanliness (6th), spirituality (12th) and the relationship itself (7th).

But overall this composite isnít that good OR bad. It has its positives and negatives. But I donít think itís strong enough to maintain a lasting relationship or to be able to truly connect. No conjunctions between the inner planets with each other, and not enough positive trines/Sextiles especially to override the negatives.
And 2 personal planets (mercury and mars) being afflicted meaning only making hard aspects, is tough.


You should post the synastry though, synastry explains how the two people feel about each other. Composite is just the dynamic/themes and how well the two people can connect and sustain the relationship. So itís shows longevity and how strong the relationship itself is.

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cherryann
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posted July 10, 2018 07:11 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for cherryann     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
thank you

you are right about the communication he is the one who can turn cold with his words
and thats also true there is a intense sexual attraction
fighting with him is no fun it's intense

he has natal mars square pluto and moon in scorpio conjunct pluto so the composite mirrors his mars pluto aspect

i feel he uses sexuality for dealing with his inner anger, this anger would turn in destructive behavior against himself

my connection with him is intense and on one side totally familiar and warm and sweet and on the other side there is ignorance, anger, coldness there is nothing in between

in our synastry i like moon venus aspects
but the pluto theme shows also up his sun and moon in aspect with my pluto and his pluto conjuncts my venus

overall no sun moon, moon moon aspects
no mars venus...


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todd
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posted July 10, 2018 08:12 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for todd     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I have to agree ,it does look abusive and actually potentially violent because the mars/pluto midpoint is conjunct the Saturn/Uranus conjunction/midpoint. these being opposed to chiron.

I have to assume you are hanging in there because you think this will lead to a committed relationship or marriage as Jupiter is opposed thevertex and square to the sun. this aspect does give very positive feelings when you are not fighting but vertex aspects can be very deceiving in that the promises it holds more often than not , do not manifest in the chart. so though you feel this will become committed, the chances are it will not because the mars/pluto energies are so powerful and ultimately destructive for your self esteem. yes the sex can be over powering but it often includes physical abuse. he is enjoyingthe abusive aspects of the sexual relationship and not interested in any emotional intimacy.

you are correct that you stay with him because of the moon/Saturn conjunction. this aspect shows great devotion even if the relationship is bad or destructive as this one seems. with Uranus involved, this has to be a off and on attraction between you.

Neptune square the node indicates that drugs/alcohol are also a big part of the chemistry here which in the long run will bite you in your bum. as his Saturn is conjunct your Neptune ,it is clear drugs are part of the attraction and itseems you are deluding yourself about him..

todd

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cherryann
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posted July 10, 2018 08:57 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for cherryann     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
wow thats correct he drinks to much alcohol we meet in a time where i go out on weekends and liked to party and we had so much fun together, but my lifestyle changed completely
his is still the same it's worst!

and you are so right with the point about my self-esteem i feel like i have to fight for it and protect myself when i'm with him in a discussion or disagreement he hurt with his attitude towards me and the coldness and he never say sorry for what he did or say he becomes so easy offended


but you described it very well there is this feeling (sounds crazy) he is the one for me a feeling of we should be together
in synastry we have moon venus aspects i thought this is the point of positive feelings between us
but what holds him in this connection?

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todd
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posted July 11, 2018 03:06 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for todd     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by cherryann:
wow thats correct he drinks to much alcohol we meet in a time where i go out on weekends and liked to party and we had so much fun together, but my lifestyle changed completely
his is still the same it's worst!

and you are so right with the point about my self-esteem i feel like i have to fight for it and protect myself when i'm with him in a discussion or disagreement he hurt with his attitude towards me and the coldness and he never say sorry for what he did or say he becomes so easy offended


but you described it very well there is this feeling (sounds crazy) he is the one for me a feeling of we should be together
in synastry we have moon venus aspects i thought this is the point of positive feelings between us
but what holds him in this connection?


as I have already mentioned, Saturn conjunct the moon strong devotional feelings even is the relationship is toxic to the max.
in addition, I think he stays with it because you are the perfect victim. that is you suffer through his abuse. he is looking for some one to victimize and you seem to fit the bill.

todd

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cherryann
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posted July 11, 2018 03:27 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for cherryann     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
thank you for your answer astrology is such a great tool to bring the unconsious to the light

this rethinking about our connection is the last step to cut him out of my life and my thoughts i haven't feelt like a victim but this connection can turn in something really ugly i bewared myself and stepped back

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LunaIscariot
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posted July 11, 2018 03:37 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for LunaIscariot     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
You have a need for drama and intensity in your relationships and you attract these types of people into your life. You have to be careful because having venus in Scorpio conjunct Pluto in your 7th means you have a tendency to get into abusive or toxic relationships. Remember that obsession/passion is NOT love. Love is easy and light and carefree, no drama involved. Itís peaceful and brings a sense of calm and comfort/security. Thatís the nature of Venus and the 7th house. Balance/harmony and equality, equal give and take.
The unhealthy manifestation of Pluto in the 7th is drama, too much intensity that it causes disruptive emotions and anxiety, fear, co-dependency, jealousy and suspicion or resentment. And power plays/manipulation.

The healthy version is 100 trust and loyalty. And being in a partnership that EMPOWERS you, not takes it away but you giving it all away to your partner, hence making you insecure or co-dependent.

I have Scorpio DSC with Pluto there myself so I know how important it is to get a good understanding and handle on this placement (Pluto in the 7th house).

Itís funny too because my ex is a Scorpio moon with mars square Pluto exactly like this guy and 100 the same thing I dealt with. Him never saying sorry, being crazy defensive (thatís the mars/Pluto) and being very cold and hurtful with his words. It was a toxic relationship just like yours sounds.
Realize that itís not your fault he acts like this, this is something HE has to mature out of and fix. And you need to respect yourself enough to leave this unhealthy dynamic 👍

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cherryann
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posted July 11, 2018 05:08 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for cherryann     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
thank you
yes i work on myself i try to reflect my feelings and intentions but in some cases it's hard to seperate love and obsession/posession it is this level of intensity i feel so drawn to it feels so real and present but the downside isn't worth anything else
in my relationships pluto is always strong not only in love also in platonic friendships and most of my close friends have scorpio ac

it's hard for me to find love it's like you wrote i attract this relationships (only 2 in my life) this guys are coming towards me they are the only ones who are interrested, guys without pluto issues are scared of me :/

but i will work and i can see now the signs of toxic relationships and will never get involved

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