posted September 05, 2018 07:53 AM            

I have been going through this transit for a year now but I haven't really been feeling the effects until it opposed my Moon. My partner is going through the same transit on his own and it has not been good. Saturn is currently touching a t-square in his natal chart. It is conjunct his Moon and Jupiter right now, trigerring our synastry Moon-Moon opposition as well.

He's feeling more of it than I am. He's been dealing with depression and anxiety lately. He always says he's always miserable no matter what, but this time, even more so. I, on the other hand, promised and refused to give up on him and everything we have planned for both of us. But that has been increasingly difficult as he wallows in his misery and forgets that I am still here.

I am currently at a loss. He has been so stressed out that he's flipping out more often about small things. It triggers me when he does this because my own abusive dad flipped out on every little thing that I didn't do right. But unlike my dad, he never gets violent, physically. He just gets mad.

I've also been feeling like I haven't been taking care of myself enough anymore--like my energy is put more towards other people and nothing left for myself. And especially for him. I always put his needs first before mine and I've been feeling drained. I tried to explain this to him, everything that I'm feeling, only to be met with a cold shoulder.

posted September 06, 2018 03:15 PM            

Cancer Moon is a lot tougher & resilient than appearance suggests. And the truth is that they WANT to open up emotionally as their emotional nature is fluid & dynamic.

So emotions NEED release as they come so that their minds can be open to other thought patterns.

But when they hold things in, moodiness results and insecurity mounts as imaginings work on overdrive.

And that means that defensiveness can start. After that Cancer is sullen,sulky, whiny and unpleasant to be around.

Cap is more reserved when it comes to the "softer" sides of their emotions. But are proactive when it comes to "productive" things or the more tangible stuff.

So unlike Cancer,you can ask a Cap to talk about feelings & emotions,they become awkward. You ask them to talk about work,they have more to say.

The current Saturn transit may be forcing a lot of suppressed feelings to the fore. As depression is momentum of chronic thought patterns. Cynicism and a narrow outlook occurs.

So this is the "outcome" of much in-held insecurities & feelings that are now finding expression.

But to you he looks unrecognizable as this
is the emotional aspect of the Moon that is coming out. And its coming out in a destructive way as a result of suppression(I suspect)

I won't tell you what to do. But I will say as a Cancer Moon myself, we are quick to internalize tension and take on people's negative vibes(all water Moons can do this)

But for other Moon signs(earth and air), its not that personal and they are able to differentiate or detach their own feelings from those of their partner or someone close to them.

With the Cancer Moon however, one is so sensitive and "open" that the longer they are with someone the more they "merge" with them.

And so you expect the person you are with to reciprocate in kind i.e. to treat you with as much kid gloves as you do them. As you consider yourself a part of them.

So it hurts when they don't. But that is also because they are presently unkind to themselves. And that means they just don't know how to be kind to you.

Detach... Detach...Detach. In order for you to survive, consider him as going through what he is going through and support where you can. But don't be a Martyr.

It may be hard given that your nature is to take care of someone/save them. But consider yourself as the person in need of saving first. And then keep yourself out of harms way.

You can't be sad enough to make the person you love believe you understand what they are going through. Nor can you feel sad enough to make the person you love happy.

You need to set the tone here and control your own emotions. If he decides to get on the bandwagon,he is more than welcome to. But for now you will Zing! Whilst he Zangs!

Be happy. Allow yourself to feel happy. It will pass.

posted September 06, 2018 03:56 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
Oh wow Solar_Leo_Queen

Cancer Moon is a lot tougher & resilient than appearance suggests. And the truth is that they WANT to open up emotionally as their emotional nature is fluid & dynamic.

So emotions NEED release as they come so that their minds can be open to other thought patterns.

But when they hold things in, moodiness results and insecurity mounts as imaginings work on overdrive.

And that means that defensiveness can start. After that Cancer is sullen,sulky, whiny and unpleasant to be around.

Cap is more reserved when it comes to the "softer" sides of their emotions. But are proactive when it comes to "productive" things or the more tangible stuff.

So unlike Cancer,you can ask a Cap to talk about feelings & emotions,they become awkward. You ask them to talk about work,they have more to say.

The current Saturn transit may be forcing a lot of suppressed feelings to the fore. As depression is momentum of chronic thought patterns. Cynicism and a narrow outlook occurs.

So this is the "outcome" of much in-held insecurities & feelings that are now finding expression.

But to you he looks unrecognizable as this
is the emotional aspect of the Moon that is coming out. And its coming out in a destructive way as a result of suppression(I suspect)

I won't tell you what to do. But I will say as a Cancer Moon myself, we are quick to internalize tension and take on people's negative vibes(all water Moons can do this)

But for other Moon signs(earth and air), its not that personal and they are able to differentiate or detach their own feelings from those of their partner or someone close to them.

With the Cancer Moon however, one is so sensitive and "open" that the longer they are with someone the more they "merge" with them.

And so you expect the person you are with to reciprocate in kind i.e. to treat you with as much kid gloves as you do them. As you consider yourself a part of them.

So it hurts when they don't. But that is also because they are presently unkind to themselves. And that means they just don't know how to be kind to you.

Detach... Detach...Detach. In order for you to survive, consider him as going through what he is going through and support where you can. But don't be a Martyr.

It may be hard given that your nature is to take care of someone/save them. But consider yourself as the person in need of saving first. And then keep yourself out of harms way.

You can't be sad enough to make the person you love believe you understand what they are going through. Nor can you feel sad enough to make the person you love happy.

You need to set the tone here and control your own emotions. If he decides to get on the bandwagon,he is more than welcome to. But for now you will Zing! Whilst he Zangs!

Be happy. Allow yourself to feel happy. It will pass.

Remind me of these same words when Saturn transits my Moon later on. Right now , it sits on my Sun by conjunction. Not fun!

---

These are great insights and suggestions, Aries23Degrees - especially the bit about detachment. OP, wish you and your partner a lot of healing. Please make sure to focus on something that makes you feel like you're using a talent, something you couldn't really teach anyone else even if you wanted to. What I mean by this is create a safe and enjoyable space for yourself. It will make the world of difference.

And while you try to tend to your own needs, please don't put off setting clear boundaries about what kind of behaviour you will put up with. We're grown ups now, for better or worse, and we can draw lines to how we deserve to be treated. Take care of yourself! Be well. Saturn is a tough teacher.

posted September 15, 2018 11:29 PM            

Cognitive defusion techniques help create distance from your emotions while also acknowledging what you are feeling, it helps you feel your emotions in a more detached way by helping you create some distance from them, so it helps reduce the intensity (good for when your emotions or thoughts are overpowering you), it helps with emotional regulation but if you are feeling numb then that means you are dissociating and you need to engage in grounding techniques not cognitive defusion techniques so it depends.

posted September 16, 2018 11:32 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by hypatia238:
Saturn in hard aspect to the Moon is rough, I seem to find the square the hardest. I actually feel that saturn in hard aspect to the moon does make you more detached as you get used to the transit and gives you thicker thin but bc you are more detached you feel more alone and disconnected, you can be around people and still feel alone, you feel depressed during that transit bc you feel numb actually so is like you are too detached. I feel it helps build up your resilience the transit but is painful.

Cognitive defusion techniques help create distance from your emotions while also acknowledging what you are feeling, it helps you feel your emotions in a more detached way by helping you create some distance from them, so it helps reduce the intensity (good for when your emotions or thoughts are overpowering you), it helps with emotional regulation but if you are feeling numb then that means you are dissociating and you need to engage in grounding techniques not cognitive defusion techniques so it depends.

That been said you will not be able to avoid the pain of such transit but with coping skills it will help reduce the intensity of the pain to a point that is manageable and you can function. Beyond that you have to just ride it out. You cannot take care of him per say specially when you are feeling like you are drowning yourself but you can do self-care stuff together as a couple.

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I remember having the square in 2013/2014 when Saturn was in Libra. While I didn't think much about it then, I realized a lot of things back in the day. I was in high school at time. I had so many friends and was popular and well-known throughout the school. But at the end of the transit, I realized I was truly alone and that I really only had one to three true friends. The others were either wanting to get some popularity through me or just wanted to be around me because everyone else was. When I wasn't in school, I spent my days sitting in my room feeling so miserable. I tried to counteract it by going on social media and "reaching out" to people to hang out. The hanging out part didn't always happen, but I did talk to people through social media. It was my way of comforting myself and avoiding the real issue. At the end of it all, I learned to be comfortable with being myself and not trying to change just so a lot of people will like me. I could care less nowadays.