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Author
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Topic: 2 Fish in a Bowl..Relationship Unfulfillment
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Starry~*
Knowflake Posts: 649
From: New York, USA
Registered: Nov 2011
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posted November 15, 2018 12:01 PM
  
Hi everyone,I'm posting for a friend of mine who would like some insight with her current boyfriend.
They started dating in April but things were rocky at the start. They didn't officially become a couple til recently (Nov). The man had asked her to be his GF to which she is hesitant because she's not sure if he is ready (i.e., she is concerned that he may not have enough experience and that she's wary he might not be able to meet her needs in a commitment). I took a look at their charts and I felt that since they are both Pisces, there'd be mutual understanding. I like that they have NN/Sun and Sun/Venus but I can't seem to pick up anything too bad besides the Mercury sq Moon and Pluto Would anyone like to shed some insight on these charts and take a pass at whether or not there's potential for them to reconcile their differences (if any) or if the man is willing to learn? My friend is inside, man is outside:  Composite:  IP: Logged |
LunaIscariot
Knowflake Posts: 2649
From:
Registered: Aug 2014
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posted November 15, 2018 12:25 PM
Nope. Not great synastry or composite.
This definitely isn’t going to last, can almost guarantee it. Tell her to cut her losses 👍 The composite Venus is a mess, only making harsh aspects, to the outer planets nonetheless. In synasty, there isn’t much interaspects between each other. The relationship rulers aren’t stimulated enough and there isn’t enough symbolism matching between them for each other’s type. Sure the sun/Venus conjunction is nice but it’s her venus would be better if it was the man. Very basic/average synastry you could find a dime a dozen. IP: Logged |
ana_bee
Knowflake Posts: 241
From:
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted November 15, 2018 12:52 PM
Composite Venus is indeed badly aspected, but they have a strong core with Sun, Moon, Pluto forming a grand trine.
Comp Jupiter makes a trine to their Sun, Mars, NN Conjunction! This relationship will be quite dynamic and ultimately lead to advancement in some way.Too bad that Venus is that afflicted. This could be a real stumbling block towards a fulfilling love relationship. @lunalscariot
But seriously.. you can’t recommend someone not to pursue a relationship just based on Astrology!! No professional astrologer would do that. Every relationship serves a purpose, and is a step towards self actualization. Where would we be if we only waited for ‘forever after’.. most people would stay forever single or start their first relationship in their 50s  Maybe this is exactly what they need, as a step forward. Who knows what ultimately comes out of it..
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LunaIscariot
Knowflake Posts: 2649
From:
Registered: Aug 2014
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posted November 15, 2018 01:16 PM
She already stated they’ve been having problems since the beginning and it’s pretty obvious why...she also literally asked us to state our opinion on whether or not she should do just that. Pursue this etc.
she asked if it’s going to work out and I’m giving my honest opinion. I don’t think it will.
Sure you could force it “cuz every relationship has potential for growth”,
But the lesson with this one if anything would be, to not force it lol if it’s not working from the beginning, it’s usually for good reason 👍 no point staying in a mediocre relationship or one that’s already having issues from the start just to see if there is a lesson involved.
But this is also just my opinion and I’m entitled to it. You don’t have to agree with me  IP: Logged |
Starry~*
Knowflake Posts: 649
From: New York, USA
Registered: Nov 2011
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posted November 15, 2018 01:24 PM
Thank you both for your input!I am close to my friend and she has mentioned time and time again how she is unsure if he can learn how to develop a deep meaningful and intimate relationship. Some examples that she gave were:
- Asking him to reach out to her more, get to know her more. She claims that he isn't really doing it and they have 1 way conversations with her initiating them. However, he doesn't really reciprocate.
- She wants him to initiate things with her and plan dates. He is slowly trying here and there but not to her satisfaction...yet. She's not sure if this is because of his lack of experience in dating or if it's his indifference. The mutual attraction is present. But my friend is concerned about his level of effort. I suspect this to be the incompatible Mars signs..hers in Gem and his in Cap. Very different approaches. Cap mars like to build from ground up and that means taking time. Gem mars? Not sure. IP: Logged |
margym0o
Knowflake Posts: 1118
From: Canada
Registered: Jul 2014
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posted November 16, 2018 11:32 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Starry~*:
Thank you both for your input!I am close to my friend and she has mentioned time and time again how she is unsure if he can learn how to develop a deep meaningful and intimate relationship. Some examples that she gave were:
- Asking him to reach out to her more, get to know her more. She claims that he isn't really doing it and they have 1 way conversations with her initiating them. However, he doesn't really reciprocate.
- She wants him to initiate things with her and plan dates. He is slowly trying here and there but not to her satisfaction...yet. She's not sure if this is because of his lack of experience in dating or if it's his indifference. The mutual attraction is present. But my friend is concerned about his level of effort. I suspect this to be the incompatible Mars signs..hers in Gem and his in Cap. Very different approaches. Cap mars like to build from ground up and that means taking time. Gem mars? Not sure.
Judging from this scenario I'd say it's more a question of her age, her patience and if she's willing to put in the time/effort to give this relationship a fair shot. If she's at a point where the clock is ticking then I'd also suggest she cuts her losses and moves on to someone who fulfills her needs to her satisfaction (hopefully from the onset and not with her badgering him). If not, then perhaps she can allow herself the time to see it through and help him grow, especially if there is mutual attraction and interest. It's complicated, because IME men mature much slower, so if he is a good man but just needs a little "fine-tuning" if you will, then it is acceptable to go through these hurdles and hopefully he becomes a more nurturing person because of it. However if he is one who should already be mature and have learned his life-lessons, then perhaps it boils down to true incompatibility (as the charts are suggesting) and she would be better off with someone else, despite the attraction. The worst thing she can do is become his "babysitter" in a way because it will be draining on her in the long run. The date-planning thing is not as concerning because with a little effort someone can become better at that, but what is REALLY alarming to me if she is always having to initiate conversations with him and not getting any engaging interest in return. That will get old REAL fast, and it kind of shows he doesn't have much interest in her as a person (which is obviously not genuine love and clearly NOT acceptable in a lasting relationship). It could be laziness also, but I think it could also just be mental incompatibility because she doesn't stimulate his mind. If he talks to his friends/family etc. with ease but has a hard time talking to her, then that might tell you everything you need to know. IP: Logged |
Nezumi
Newflake Posts: 16
From:
Registered: Jul 2012
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posted November 16, 2018 12:35 PM
The guy is Pisces Sun with Mars conjunct Neptune... I mean what he does now regarding courtship it's probably the way things are always going to be between them. Plus he has an Aries Venus so maybe he is expecting a woman to take charge and chase him. 
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Lalafortunaea
Knowflake Posts: 879
From:
Registered: Jul 2017
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posted November 17, 2018 11:10 AM
Yes typically fire Venus men want an assertive woman who'll pursue him. IP: Logged |
Hikaru29
Knowflake Posts: 40
From: Asia
Registered: Nov 2018
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posted November 18, 2018 05:12 AM
I don't think fire Venus typically likes to be pursued. My guy with Leo Venus said he likes to be the chaser. It may make him feel good to be pursued but you're not gonna have a special place in his heart.Back to the synastry...his Mars in Capricorn may be the reason why he's not taking much initiative... Capricorns are quite calculated in their approach and may appear cool/aloof. Is her Mars in Gemini? These are 2 very different energies. Gemini Mars will need to slow down her pace. IP: Logged |
HelixID
Knowflake Posts: 286
From:
Registered: Jun 2014
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posted November 18, 2018 06:18 AM
They are too similar. Both Pisces Suns, both Leo Asc, both have Dsc ruler in Cap. Both want the same from a partner and neither gets what they want because they are too much alike. There's no reciprocal understanding, their personalities don't complement each other, there's just stagnation.IP: Logged |
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