posted November 18, 2018 03:40 AM            

I read that this aspect can cause someone to reject love/not able to show love, is it true? Cafeastrology says - "They are masters at protecting their feelings, and do whatever they can to avoid letting others know of their vulnerabilities." - which sounds like the guy I'm seeing now.

I also read this - "why they might remain loyal to a challenging marriage can be a fear of letting down family and of what he or she feels would be a blow to the reputation." - and it really sounds like my best friend who also has this aspect.

For those with this aspect (or the squares, opp, trines etc), can you share your experience and how do we reach out to you in love? What will make you break down your barriers? What natal aspect in a partner will be a good match?

posted November 18, 2018 04:15 AM            

In all honesty I'm not sure why I act the way I act when I like someone... Perhaps it's my Cancer Venus/Mars too. Or my Pluto aspects to my Sun/Mars... But the more I like someone, the less obvious it'll be. I'll just start acting weird and something I really cannot control lol. It'll either be too serious, or too not serious (Saturn oppose Jupiter, not sure which one kicks in when).

posted November 18, 2018 04:44 AM            

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Originally posted by Brenda_S:
I've got the quincunx... Not sure if that would be in any way similar... But I feel that it would act somewhat like a Uranus aspect, which I have natally opposing my Venus too so it might not be what you're looking for...

In all honesty I'm not sure why I act the way I act when I like someone... Perhaps it's my Cancer Venus/Mars too. Or my Pluto aspects to my Sun/Mars... But the more I like someone, the less obvious it'll be. I'll just start acting weird and something I really cannot control lol. It'll either be too serious, or too not serious (Saturn oppose Jupiter, not sure which one kicks in when).

I've told I like a guy just recently... And my actions don't match up for sure. I act hot and cold. My Cancer Mars just passionately kicks in every now and again and then just backs off. Like dunno wtf I'm doing I'm so weird and I guess I'm lucky I haven't scared the guy off yet lol maybe he's just confused (which is what I've been told I am).

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Hi Brenda, that's really great info you gave! My guy with Venus conj Saturn also has Mars in Cancer and what you've just described really sounds like him as well... He'll give me the cold shoulder the whole night and then tell me he's been wanting to kiss me, so yeah, you guys are confusing as hell, LOL!

Does your Venus-Saturn quincunx makes you feel apprehensive about love?

posted November 18, 2018 05:17 AM            

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Originally posted by Hikaru29:
Hi Brenda, that's really great info you gave! My guy with Venus conj Saturn also has Mars in Cancer and what you've just described really sounds like him as well... He'll give me the cold shoulder the whole night and then tell me he's been wanting to kiss me, so yeah, you guys are confusing as hell, LOL!

Does your Venus-Saturn quincunx makes you feel apprehensive about love?

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Normally if I like you but act cold 'the whole night', it must be something you triggered for me to act that way. Sometimes it might be regret even, which has nothing with you. Probably rather the case of a one night stand thingy lol. But if it's someone I already know and consistently sleep with, and act cold... It might be because you somewhat portrayed those same actions and kinda made me feel insecure to some extent. Actually that's a big one. Or you must've said something (or not said something). But it's true the next day I'll think I'm an idiot for reacting that way and will be all Cancer-y in its' positive light again lol.

Just to give you an example...I was with this guy, and he was asking me a question which we already had an entire conversation about. I was so insulted that he didn't remember lol (he's got his Sun/Moon/Mercury/Venus in his 12th and Moon/Mercury in Pisces which is very typical of them for stuff to not seep in) I didn't even react immediately, only like a while later when the topic was about something completely different, which is what he thought I was affected by...

So yeah you'll probably never know unless something else happens, sometimes completely unrelated and I'll just be p*ssed for everything at once. And if you know how to hit my soft spot I might tell you what triggered it all. Otherwise you'll just go in rounds like forever lol.

BTW one thing that might help you... This guy I'm talking about also had a Cancer Mars so kinda knew how to deal with it. But if you wanna get anything outta him if he's distant, don't be like 'if you wanna share it, share it'. That'll never work. I want you to be on my *ss till you get it out of me. Like I really wanna be sure that you're fully interested in what I have to say and the being vulnerable part won't just be another random fact I'm sharing.

posted November 18, 2018 05:50 AM            

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Originally posted by Brenda_S:
Normally if I like you but act cold 'the whole night', it must be something you triggered for me to act that way. Sometimes it might be regret even, which has nothing with you. Probably rather the case of a one night stand thingy lol. But if it's someone I already know and consistently sleep with, and act cold... It might be because you somewhat portrayed those same actions and kinda made me feel insecure to some extent. Actually that's a big one. Or you must've said something (or not said something). But it's true the next day I'll think I'm an idiot for reacting that way and will be all Cancer-y in its' positive light again lol.

Just to give you an example...I was with this guy, and he was asking me a question which we already had an entire conversation about. I was so insulted that he didn't remember lol (he's got his Sun/Moon/Mercury/Venus in his 12th and Moon/Mercury in Pisces which is very typical of them for stuff to not seep in) I didn't even react immediately, only like a while later when the topic was about something completely different, which is what he thought I was affected by...

So yeah you'll probably never know unless something else happens, sometimes completely unrelated and I'll just be p*ssed for everything at once. And if you know how to hit my soft spot I might tell you what triggered it all. Otherwise you'll just go in rounds like forever lol.

BTW one thing that might help you... This guy I'm talking about also had a Cancer Mars so kinda knew how to deal with it. But if you wanna get anything outta him if he's distant, don't be like 'if you wanna share it, share it'. That'll never work. I want you to be on my *ss till you get it out of me. Like I really wanna be sure that you're fully interested in what I have to say and the being vulnerable part won't just be another random fact I'm sharing.

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It could have been something I did/didn't do..I've a Gemini venus and can be a bit flirty. Perhaps he feels insecure? I don't know.. then again, he's flirty as well! He won't come near me the whole night but he'll stare at me when I talk to other guys. Recently he saw me dancing with a gay friend and subsequently said something weird to me and I got upset.. then I realised that he didn't know that guy was a gay. He probably thought I danced with another guy to get a jealous reaction out of him. Another time he suddenly said something about our r/s not working out.. I thought he wanted to stop seeing me, then he said I haven't contacted him much lately and he loves talking to me. Could that be the "trigger"?? *confused*

How do I get this crab to come out of his shell?

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[b]And about the apprehension... Do you mean about being scared to fall in love? I wouldn't say that I am... But if I'm unsure about the person then yeah maybe. Unless I'm not understanding your question properly?[b]

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What I mean is do you have difficulty opening your heart to fall deeply in love with someone? To let your affection flow... I read that ppl with Venus-Saturn sometimes hold back their affection.

posted November 18, 2018 07:04 AM            

It's very likely that that's in fact the reason...

And about what you said him thinking it ain't working out... With me, if I think I want out, I'm very abrupt about it. There's no 'discussing' it. I'm just out. But if I bring it up as a form of discussion, it's in my mind still workable but I want you to be aware that there's something bothering me here.

I was with my husband for 6 years. I mentioned the working part at our second. He figured it's a joke or something. When I was at the peak of it, we were separated in a week and divorced a month later. At that point I shut my feelings off and there was no way I was gonna change my mind. (And funny up until our separation it's not like there was this heavy vibe surrounding the wanting to separate kinda thingy, like it was super casual topically just like it was a year/2/3/4 prior - it was literally 'like that' that it all changed)

So yeah if he brings it up... Well don't take it lightly is all I can say lol.

posted November 19, 2018 12:31 AM            

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Originally posted by Brenda_S:
Lol I can be flirty too. Gemini moon and rising and Mercury in Aries in my eleventh. But if you trigger me in the wrong ways... I convert into a complete Cancer it's not even funny.

It's very likely that that's in fact the reason...

And about what you said him thinking it ain't working out... With me, if I think I want out, I'm very abrupt about it. There's no 'discussing' it. I'm just out. But if I bring it up as a form of discussion, it's in my mind still workable but I want you to be aware that there's something bothering me here.

I was with my husband for 6 years. I mentioned the working part at our second. He figured it's a joke or something. When I was at the peak of it, we were separated in a week and divorced a month later. At that point I shut my feelings off and there was no way I was gonna change my mind. (And funny up until our separation it's not like there was this heavy vibe surrounding the wanting to separate kinda thingy, like it was super casual topically just like it was a year/2/3/4 prior - it was literally 'like that' that it all changed)

So yeah if he brings it up... Well don't take it lightly is all I can say lol.

And about the letting emotions flow... It's tough to say. I've been told that I don't. But to me it feels that I try to at least. But I certainly need to feel at ease or that I won't be judged for it. But again I think the other aspects to my Venus would play a role here as well. It's Uranus and Neptune opposing it so not sure. Although the Saturn is a tighter orb, Jupiter is semi sextile my Venus so I believe there would be a bit of both there. Like very forward or very much not. But I certainly need to feel triggered at least if I'm gonna say something affectionate.

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I don't take him lightly. When he said it I was sad and I backed off a little but 2 weeks later he gave me that 'I-miss-you-so-much' look and we reconciled. Recently he asked if I loved him..I said I do, and when I asked him back, he gave me an answer which I couldn't understand..something like "of course I've feelings for you if not why would I be with you..". I wasn't happy as I wanted a direct 'yes/no' answer. Another time he asked what I like about him... it seems he wanted a lot of validation. Is this due to his Venus-Saturn aspect or Mars in Cancer?

He has quite a busy Moon - square Mars/Jupiter/Asc, sextile Neptune, conj Pluto/NN/Pallas/Psyche, trine Lilith, semisquare Saturn, semi-sextile Uranus, sesqui Vertex.

posted November 19, 2018 02:01 AM            

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Originally posted by Hikaru29:
I don't take him lightly. When he said it I was sad and I backed off a little but 2 weeks later he gave me that 'I-miss-you-so-much' look and we reconciled. Recently he asked if I loved him..I said I do, and when I asked him back, he gave me an answer which I couldn't understand..something like "of course I've feelings for you if not why would I be with you..". I wasn't happy as I wanted a direct 'yes/no' answer. Another time he asked what I like about him... it seems he wanted a lot of validation. Is this due to his Venus-Saturn aspect or Mars in Cancer?

He has quite a busy Moon - square Mars/Jupiter/Asc, sextile Neptune, conj Pluto/NN/Pallas/Psyche, trine Lilith, semisquare Saturn, semi-sextile Uranus, sesqui Vertex.

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The aspects you just described to his moon... The overall feel I'm getting of this is him wallowing in his own emotions with the Neptune/Pluto aspects. It might be intense and confusing at the same time. And the Saturn/Uranus combo... Makes him feel like 'forget it she's not getting me' if he feels it's a bit shaky, hence just murmuring some words and leaving you wondering what he means by it. And all this is brought to the forefront with the square from his Jupiter/Mars to his ascendant. Hence him asking you all these questions to satisfy what's beneath.

His moon is what he feels. His Venus is him expressing those positive affections, if any.

If you were just Geminianizing his question with 'yeah I like you' and he didn't feel it from you. You asking the same question in return might have just thrown him off balance and not wanting to express the same in return. He didn't feel the depth when you were saying it. (I once expressed a certain trait I like in a person to someone... When I had previously mentioned that he possessed that trait. He asked me, you mean 'like like?' I just responded with this face like 'duh you didn't just ask me that' - it was instantaneous that I felt super embarrassed for even thinking in that direction - just didn't feel like being forward about it when I wasn't sure about his stance - terrible crush on that person FYI lol don't think he knows the extent of it, if even at all - so your guy not saying anything could be him just being crushed from the inside - if he actually feels that about you that is...)

That's the vibe I'm getting from your guy. I might be wrong (I doubt it though - I think it's very Mars Cancer, maybe even Saturn aspects). But that's probably why he asked to describe what you like about him, so he can see the depth of your 'love'.

posted November 19, 2018 02:39 AM            

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Originally posted by Brenda_S:
The aspects you just described to his moon... The overall feel I'm getting of this is him wallowing in his own emotions with the Neptune/Pluto aspects. It might be intense and confusing at the same time. And the Saturn/Uranus combo... Makes him feel like 'forget it she's not getting me' if he feels it's a bit shaky, hence just murmuring some words and leaving you wondering what he means by it. And all this is brought to the forefront with the square from his Jupiter/Mars to his ascendant. Hence him asking you all these questions to satisfy what's beneath.

His moon is what he feels. His Venus is him expressing those positive affections, if any.

If you were just Geminianizing his question with 'yeah I like you' and he didn't feel it from you. You asking the same question in return might have just thrown him off balance and not wanting to express the same in return. He didn't feel the depth when you were saying it. (I once expressed a certain trait I like in a person to someone... When I had previously mentioned that he possessed that trait. He asked me, you mean 'like like?' I just responded with this face like 'duh you didn't just ask me that' - it was instantaneous that I felt super embarrassed for even thinking in that direction - just didn't feel like being forward about it when I wasn't sure about him - terrible crush on that person FYI lol don't think he knows the extent of it, if even at all - so your guy not saying anything could be him just being crushed from the inside - if he actually feels that about you that is...)

That's the vibe I'm getting from your guy. I might be wrong (I doubt it though - I think it's very Mars Cancer, maybe even Saturn aspects). But that's probably why he asked to describe what you like about him, so he can see the depth of your 'love'.

What I'm picking up from all this is that he just feels insecure and not sure where you stand in this.

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LOL, when that guy asked you that qn it could be him trying to ascertain what your "like" means. I've also ever asked my guy what he means when he says he likes me v much. Friendship like? Romantic like? I need to know...

Like you said, it could be that he's not getting the answers he wants. He asked me how much I love him but I couldn't answer.. not becos I doubt my feelings but I didn't put a ruler in my heart. When I love someone, I just love... It could be that very stabilising feel he gives me or the way he smiles but if I were to tell him this, it might not satisfy him, like... is that it? lol. However, I did eventually answered his qn: that I like that he's stable and serious yet he can be humorous or maybe he wasn't trying.. his mannerism is just adorable. I also like his gentle and easy-going manners. There's many more...

posted November 19, 2018 02:46 AM            

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Originally posted by Brenda_S:
Wanna post your synastry chart minus the asteroids? Assuming you have his TOB. (might not do it immediately though since gotta have the patience, but in case I do...)

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I have it here - http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum35/HTML/008413.html
You may want to scroll a little further down to see the edited charts.

What I'm hoping is also to get some insights into our Composite/Davison but I welcome more inputs to our Synastry as well.

This is his Natal:

posted November 19, 2018 02:57 AM            

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Originally posted by Hikaru29:
LOL, when that guy asked you that qn it could be him trying to ascertain what your "like" means. I've also ever asked my guy what he means when he says he likes me v much. Friendship like? Romantic like? I need to know...

Like you said, it could be that he's not getting the answers he wants. He asked me how much I love him but I couldn't answer.. not becos I doubt my feelings but I didn't put a ruler in my heart. When I love someone, I just love... It could be that very stabilising feel he gives me or the way he smiles but if I were to tell him this, it might not satisfy him, like... is that it? lol. However, I did eventually answered his qn: that I like that he's stable and serious yet he can be humorous or maybe he wasn't trying.. his mannerism is just adorable. I also like his gentle and easy-going manners. There's many more...

Right now I feel that he's gotten all the answers he wants from me but I'm not getting the answers I want.

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Lol I hope you're right about it. I know I'm not helping if I'm throwing mixed signals... This game is just 😏

But to potentially help you out, I wouldn't tell a friend I like them very much, ever. I'd coat it with a sentence or something that they shouldn't think it's anything serious. And certainly wouldn't stress on it or bring it up 'just like that'. Only if say I wanna call them out on something, I'll try to mitigate it by telling them 'I mean I like you, but...'

posted November 19, 2018 03:12 AM            

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Originally posted by Brenda_S:
Lol I hope you're right about it. I know I'm not helping if I'm throwing mixed signals... This game is just 😏

But to potentially help you out, I wouldn't tell a friend I like them very much, ever. I'd coat it with a sentence or something that they shouldn't think it's anything serious. And certainly wouldn't stress on it or bring it up 'just like that'. Only if say I wanna call them out on something, I'll try to mitigate it by telling them 'I mean I like you, but...'

And just be persistent with what you were saying to him. If he in fact likes you, guaranteed you'll be getting the answers you want. You just need to be persistent.

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I would think so too. He has said he likes me in a special way...his feelings for me are sincere... he cares about me... he feels attached to me, etc. He has expressed it in many ways except saying he loves me. And I've Pluto in the 5th house so I need to know. I'm obsessed with getting an answer, lol, that's before my Sagi Moon gets tired of it.

posted November 19, 2018 03:24 AM            

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Originally posted by Hikaru29:
I would think so too. He has said he likes me in a special way...his feelings for me are sincere... he cares about me... he feels attached to me, etc. He has expressed it in many ways except saying he loves me. And I've Pluto in the 5th house so I need to know. I'm obsessed with getting an answer, lol, that's before my Sagi Moon gets tired of it.

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Lol good that his 5th house ruler is Pluto too conjunct his moon in 3rd aspected by Mars/Jupiter. Otherwise I don't think you'll ever get what you want with Saturn being his seventh house ruler so close to his Venus. But again the synastry should certainly say more. Like if you have what it takes to trigger his 5th house or Venus...

posted November 19, 2018 03:40 AM            

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Originally posted by Brenda_S:
Lol good that his 5th house ruler is Pluto too conjunct his moon in 3rd aspected by Mars/Jupiter. Otherwise I don't think you'll ever get what you want with Saturn being his seventh house ruler so close to his Venus. But again the synastry should certainly say more. Like if you have what it takes to trigger his 5th house or Venus...

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