posted November 26, 2018 05:40 PM            

You guys have no idea how much I suffered for this man some years ago. We met by tinder and developed a strong relationship in so little time. 3 months was enough for us to live and feel things in which a lot of couples get to feel after 1 year, in the time of our relationship we used to talk about how "deep" our connection was, cause it felt like we knew each other so well, in levels that only few people could get to knows us in so little time. I felt like we really belonged each other at a soul level.

He had bad mood swings and was pretty indecisive himself, about almost everything in his life, including me. Some days he loved me like no one else, but others he didn't want me near and just wanted to be by himself, of course, I respected that and gave him the space he needed cause it was like me, my myself could feel his needs. After 3 months he finally decided to get back to his homecountry (he is french) so he broke up with me with a really stupid and nonsense excuse. So it left me feeling DEEPLY broken, like never before and never again. I used to cry everyday because of him.

After a year I learned he had a new gf thanks to facebook and it hurt me, again, really bad. The pain was so unberable cause I realized he was not coming back and probably getting over me while I spent the whole year mourning, so I decided to take past-lives therapy with an amazing therapist. In the past life regression I learned a lot about him, me, and our connection and why some things happened as they did. It opened my eyes, made me forgive him and kinda move on easily. Months later, he contacted me, confessing his feelings for me, telling me that he missed me and how I was really important hor him and his life. It was cute and made my heart sing, cause I finally was hearing the things I wanted to hear after he went.
Now, one year later, sometimes he writes me to check how my life is going but the feeling of belonging and being familiar and the connection at soul level never really fades away, everytime we get in touch all the love, admiration and connection comes back in the game as it was before, we both can feel it cause we get so romantic and affective with each other. Now he has a girlfriend and he moved on with her, but he still comes back once in a while to me with all the connection that I find really nice, but lately I feel it overwhelming too, would it always be like that? a push and pull, yes-no, hot-cold? Everytime he comes back to me I feel the love but I also feel the pain he put me through and scares me a little bit. It excites me but scares me at the same time. Our connection scares me as well, it's really good but not enought to be physically together again, what is the best that I can do? Why do I feel this doesn´t have an end? Why it never fades completely away?

Synastry (I'm blue, he's red)

posted November 27, 2018 11:47 AM            

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Originally posted by Marandana:
Why do I feel this doesn´t have an end? Why it never fades completely away?

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I'm not an expert in reaching charts but just based on your story, I feel that you should not allow him to waltz in and out of your life as he deems fit. You will never move on like this...

Your Pluto on his Venus is probably the reason why you're feeling so intense towards him. Pluto wants to possess Venus. But c.Uranus/Saturn are right next to your Sun/Venus. Not favourable. Uranus is the cause of this on/off and him blowing hot/cold, and while Saturn can glue, it can also block so unless the two of you are very committed to work on being together while allowing each other freedom? Then again, he has a gf now so what does he want?

posted November 27, 2018 01:10 PM            

you simply can't let go

posted November 28, 2018 05:07 PM            

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Originally posted by Orange:

Why it didn't manifest into a commitment - maybe because none of your Saturn is activated in your synastry. Saturn makes people wanting to work on issues and stick to each other.

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Yeah I'm sure it is, 3 months and that was it. He was the one who broke up, obviously he thought the commitment was not worth it.

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Originally posted by Hikaru29:
Uranus is the cause of this on/off and him blowing hot/cold, and while Saturn can glue, it can also block so unless the two of you are very committed to work on being together while allowing each other freedom? Then again, he has a gf now so what does he want?

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Sure. The breakup was totally uranian, never saw that coming. I was about to introduce him to my parents by the time he ended everything. And that's my question. why does he come back when he already has a girlfriend? Kinda nonsense to me, unless I look at the chart and see those aspects, well... it makes a little more sense, but still.

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Originally posted by girlwiththerainysoul:
you simply can't let go

(but most probably eventually will

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posted December 07, 2018 05:42 PM            

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Originally posted by Hikaru29:
I'm not an expert in reaching charts but just based on your story, I feel that you should not allow him to waltz in and out of your life as he deems fit. You will never move on like this...

Your Pluto on his Venus is probably the reason why you're feeling so intense towards him. Pluto wants to possess Venus. But c.Uranus/Saturn are right next to your Sun/Venus. Not favourable. Uranus is the cause of this on/off and him blowing hot/cold, and while Saturn can glue, it can also block so unless the two of you are very committed to work on being together while allowing each other freedom? Then again, he has a gf now so what does he want?

My advice is if you feel overwhelmed being in contact with him, then cut him off to protect your own sanity. I wish you all the best.

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posted December 08, 2018 12:49 AM            

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Originally posted by kani:
But isn't Venus magentically attracted to Pluto as well? I thought it's the outer planet who functions like a magnet. That would explain his behaviour as well

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In my experience both are enthralled and that will explain his initial attraction to you.. but it swiftly faded on his end like you said and he left. The fact that you have nice aspects doesn't mean that the feelings will be there forever.

posted December 08, 2018 01:04 AM            

For one obvious example, he will have Venus conjunct Pluto to many people. And will perhaps then, be very used to intense love affairs. Perhaps you're not the only one he keeps in contact with?

You do have that nice Jupiter conjunction too. That will make him remain fond of you.

You never know hat someone's motives are; he may genuinely care for your wellbeing. Or he maybe scoping his options. Or enjoys the ego boost when he needs it.

posted December 08, 2018 05:54 AM            

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Originally posted by Hikaru29:
In my experience both are enthralled and that will explain his initial attraction to you.. but it swiftly faded on his end like you said and he left. The fact that you have nice aspects doesn't mean that the feelings will be there forever.

I had sun/moon conjunct, moon/asc conjunct and venus/Mars trine DW with my ex but my attraction towards him only lasted a few months...after that it was just pain and tears. We didn't have a fantastic composite - lotsa Saturn and Neptune squares.

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Hi hikaru,

posted December 08, 2018 09:10 AM            

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Originally posted by kani:
Hi hikaru,

I'm not the OP here
I was just wondering about that Venus Pluto aspect because while browsing this site I read so many times that the Venus feels completely magentised by the Pluto person and those threads are mostly written by the Venus person.

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Oops, I replied on my phone and didn't realise (hahaha)... the words are too small.

posted December 08, 2018 10:51 AM            

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Originally posted by Hikaru29:
Oops, I replied on my phone and didn't realise (hahaha)... the words are too small.

Anyway, I actually think it's felt both ways. E.g. my Pluto is conjunct my guy's Moon and I feel obsessed. When my ex's Pluto sextile my Moon, I also felt obsessed but less intense. With the conjunction and being Pluto, I feel that I wanna devour the Moon. And when we meet we feel like devouring each other. Our eyes say it all.

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posted December 08, 2018 11:14 AM            

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Originally posted by kani:
Oh yeah definitely mutual I agree with that. My Pluto is conjunct a guy's Venus and I want to devour him too haha. He is intensely attracted to me as well but also intimated

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posted December 08, 2018 04:47 PM            

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Originally posted by Hikaru29:
The moon I'm trying to devour doesn't seem intimidated hahaha... he has the same aspect natally so I guess he's familiar with this energy and thrive on it. Sometimes I feel that we try to outdo each other to see who gets "eaten" lol. It gets quite fun at times... Really seductive.

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posted December 08, 2018 08:22 PM            

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Originally posted by kani:
Yeah if he has that aspect then he won't be easily intimidated. I have moon square Pluto natally and I don't feel intimidated easily. I do the intimidating (at first but those who care to stay find out I'm not that scary after all haha)

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Does people with Moon-Pluto get obsessed in relationships easily? My bestie has Moon square Pluto too and she needs to feel the intensity of her lover or she's not happy.

posted December 09, 2018 06:31 AM            

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Originally posted by Hikaru29:
Does people with Moon-Pluto get obsessed in relationships easily? My bestie has Moon square Pluto too and she needs to feel the intensity of her lover or she's not happy.

My Moon conj Pluto guy would tell me not to think of him too much but when I cool off he'll ask if I don't care about him anymore. Sometimes he'll give me that moody vibe...keeps looking at me but when I go near he "floats" away and goes back to staring at me secretly. Very confusing.

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posted December 09, 2018 06:33 AM            

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Originally posted by Hikaru29:

My Moon conj Pluto guy would tell me not to think of him too much but when I cool off he'll ask if I don't care about him anymore. Sometimes he'll give me that moody vibe...keeps looking at me but when I go near he "floats" away and goes back to staring at me secretly. Very confusing.

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posted December 09, 2018 07:03 AM            

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Originally posted by kani:
I would say yes I am quite obsessive and I attribute it to my moon sq Pluto (I also have Pluto in 4 and mercury in 8). I can't even imagine being interested in a guy and not excessively think about him, imagining us having sex (I had that for the past couple of months with a guy I was purely sexually interested in). If it's very obsessive I tend to overdo it and then cool off for a while, which I think is only natural as you can't keep up such a high level of obsession for too long. That is with the guy I just mentioned. My Pluto is conj his Venus and we have several Lilith contacts. That of course adds to the intensity but in the first place it's the natal and I love to indulge in sexual thoughts about him lol. I've cooled off now and maybe it won't come back. Let's see

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You seem to be describing me and I don't have pluto-moon in natal (haha) but my Pluto is in 5th which makes me obsessive in intimate relationships. With my guy we also have my Venus conjunct his Lilith.

posted December 09, 2018 07:08 AM            

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Originally posted by Hikaru29:
You seem to be describing me and I don't have pluto-moon in natal (haha) but my Pluto is in 5th which makes me obsessive in intimate relationships. With my guy we also have my Venus conjunct his Lilith.

I'm just very curious how he feels because he holds it in so well that sometimes I'm convinced he doesn't feel the same way until he tells me outta the blue that he has been thinking about us etc. Then he goes back to being very cool. Tsk.

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posted December 09, 2018 07:41 AM            

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Originally posted by kani:
It sounds as if he is trying to keep control somehow. I was like that with the guy I described before. He was very open with his attraction towards me and complained that I'm not. But I felt like I can't be as open because I have to keep my cool. I'm not like that with all men i find hot but I am/was with him.

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Why do you feel a need to keep cool with this guy? Are you afraid of your emotions overflowing?

His cool exterior makes me feel quite dejected at times like I'm the only one feeling all these, so recently I tried to break it off but he refused.

posted December 09, 2018 07:46 AM            

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Originally posted by Hikaru29:
Why do you feel a need to keep cool with this guy? Are you afraid of your emotions overflowing?

His cool exterior makes me feel quite dejected at times like I'm the only one feeling all these, so recently I tried to break it off but he refused.

Marandana, sorry for hijacking your thread!

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posted December 09, 2018 08:27 AM            

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Originally posted by kani:
Can I write you a personal message so we stop hijacking her thread? lol
Edit: can't seem to be able to yet though

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