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Author Topic:   @graham how do you see these charts?
efaki94
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Posts: 137
From: thessaloniki,greece
Registered: Jun 2020

posted October 13, 2020 09:16 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for efaki94     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hello Graham
Sorry to ask
But I saw in other topics that you
are familiar with harmonics
And I wish if you could give me your insight about this relationship.
Hope I don't bother you

Thanks in advance.

Synastry
I'm outside

Composite


Davison Chart

Draconic synastry

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Graham
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From:
Registered: Apr 2019

posted October 14, 2020 02:15 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Graham     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote

Because of your reference to harmonics, efaki ... I am not sure what you want from me here ... particularly as there are other members of this forum who are better-equipped than I am to interpret these relationship charts.

So ... please specify what you want me to look at in these charts.

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efaki94
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Posts: 137
From: thessaloniki,greece
Registered: Jun 2020

posted October 14, 2020 05:29 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for efaki94     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Graham:

Because of your reference to harmonics, efaki ... I am not sure what you want from me here ... particularly as there are other members of this forum who are better-equipped than I am to interpret these relationship charts.

So ... please specify what you want me to look at in these charts.



well thanks for your response graham.you are right it was to general.

i saw that you were referring to harmonics
like this
"Venus is 170degs 48mins 37secs from Pluto ... and 37/78ths of the 360degrees circle = 170degs 46mins 9secs"

i dont have any idea what this could mean and have no idea about harmonics
and how they can play in a synastry but i
want to learn and
thats what i wish you could tell me.

this relationship is about 2-3 years and
im not sure how faithful he is( he didnt do any wrong but my mind makes bad scanarios for some reason especially the last months)
also should we stay together according to the stars?
also in the beginning of reraltionship
he was more close to me and i was more indepedent and now it the completely opposite
with me being very clingy and pressing but in the same time im thinking to end this relationship(very confused i know).
is there something in our charts that show
these things playing out?

thanks in advance again

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Graham
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Posts: 1768
From:
Registered: Apr 2019

posted October 15, 2020 01:21 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Graham     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by efaki94:

well thanks for your response graham.you are right it was to general.

i saw that you were referring to harmonics
like this
"Venus is 170degs 48mins 37secs from Pluto ... and 37/78ths of the 360degrees circle = 170degs 46mins 9secs"

i dont have any idea what this could mean and have no idea about harmonics
and how they can play in a synastry but i
want to learn and
thats what i wish you could tell me.

this relationship is about 2-3 years and
im not sure how faithful he is( he didnt do any wrong but my mind makes bad scanarios for some reason especially the last months)
also should we stay together according to the stars?
also in the beginning of reraltionship
he was more close to me and i was more indepedent and now it the completely opposite
with me being very clingy and pressing but in the same time im thinking to end this relationship(very confused i know).
is there something in our charts that show
these things playing out?

thanks in advance again


I think the best approach here will be to first look at the davison chart (to ascertain the purpose of the relationship); next the synastry/individual charts (to ascertain the issues which each person brings to the relationship) and then the composite chart (to ascertain how others see the relationship, as a two-person team). ...And, to refer to the Draconic Chart only if/when it might add something to our conclusions from the other three explorations.

I shall need to do this in more than one session at my computer . ... So, to keep all my analyses in one "reply" space on this thread, I shall keep returning/adding to my next reply (immediately beneath this one) until stating there that "my analysis is now completed". ... In the meantime, please "watch that space" for any updates by me, and ask any questions that you have as/when they arise (but also in only one reply space, reserved specifically for your questions about my analyses.)

Finally, bear in mind that (except for Chiron) I do not use asteroids in my analyses of charts and shall not attempt to do so here. ... However, (imo) these bodies do provide additional information that will "add flesh" to my planets-only analyses here.

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Graham
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Posts: 1768
From:
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posted October 15, 2020 01:39 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Graham     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
THE DAVISON

As in all natal charts, the purpose is to "make the Sun shine" ... and, for this 6th house Aquarius Sun, my guess is that will be achieved if/when both partners "stop procrastinating".

But what is particularly interesting, efaki ... (because you noticed/picked-up the harmonics comments on other threads) ... is that Sun-Mars-Pluto are in a (very close-orbed, so very strong) 24th harmonic aspect triangle. ... [Coincidence? Serendipity? Or, activation of the current sextile from transit Saturn to Davison Pluto?] ... And the 24th harmonic = ease/pleasure in persisting with something - whilst Sun, Mars and Pluto are all in signs that point to the "something" being procrastination.

Then ... further astrological indicators of potential procrastination are ... Saturn in mutual reception with Uranus; the 3 minutes orb of the Uranus-Neptune conjunction (making these two planets "too close to separate") and the sequence/order in which progressions and transits activate both partners (Uranus->Neptune->Sun->Mercury->Saturn ... toning down the initial Uranus+Neptune urge to act/"rock-the-boat", until it becomes a rational/Mercury+Saturn decision to conform/"not-rock-the-boat".

Moreover ... there are other strong harmonic aspects in this chart that you/we might want to explore later ... Moon-Venus (9th harmonic) : Moon/Uranus+Neptune (10th harmonic) : Venus/Mars (7th harmonic) : Uranus-Neptune (every harmonic from 1st to 32nd) : and more.

However ... I now need feedback from you (on whether or not procrastination is a significant issue in this relationship).

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

THE SYNASTRY

Here ... our focus should be upon aspects between his outer planets and your inner planets, plus your outer planets to his inner planets. ... Because these reveal long-term issues that (if not addressed) can/will destroy the relationship ... (Whereas, inner to inner planet contacts reveal personality clashes - and outer to outer planets reveal issues due to age differences.)

Those outer to inner contacts are ... his Venus conjunct your Chiron : his Mars opposite your Saturn : his Mars conjunct your Chiron and his Saturn trine your Moon.

However, long-term issues can also arise from outer planet contacts of partner A to the angles + nodes of partner B. ... And these are ... his Pluto square your MC : his Pluto conjunct your north node : his Ascendant square your Uranus and his Ascendant square your Neptune.

1. his Venus conjunct your Chiron ... His Venus-in-Virgo/11th way of socially interacting with others may (subconsciously) remind you of the difficulty you experienced when socially interacting with others (during childhood and adolescence. So, if you cannot handle that, the potential problem here is that you will try to change/suppress his natural behaviour (rather than grasp the opportunity to experience/explore/confront your childhood-conditioned emotional pain). And, in not allowing/encouraging him to behave naturally (or to "be himself"), you will sow the slow-growling seed of a relationship breakdown in the future.


2. his Mars opposite your Saturn ... With this contact, the Saturn partner often states (as you do, in reply 2) "in the beginning of the relationship he was more close to me and I was more independent, and now it the completely opposite with me being very clingy and pressing".

This is because sexually-orientated Mars perceives the cool/controlled Saturn as a hard-to-win potential partner, and the Saturn person sees in Mars a spontaneous expression of passion/sexuality (which Saturn herself/himself feels he/she lacks). ... Thus, Mars makes Saturn feel like "a complete person".

Hence, the potential problem here is that the initial passion of Mars (inevitably) cools when the partner has been "won" - and the cooling of that passion causes Saturn to feel "incomplete". So, when (not if) this happens, Saturn punishes Mars by leaving the relationship (i.e.. depriving him/her of their hard won trophy - and thus, reigniting their initial desire/passion to have Saturn as a partner). ... Tragic/ironic, since both partners may still be very much in love.


3. his Mars conjunct your Chiron ... Same issue as with his Venus conjunct your Chiron - but compounded by him being able to treat everyone as "people" (rather than males/men and females/women).


4. his Saturn trine your Moon. ... This is a benevolent aspect that is capable of holding the relationship together, no matter what other issues there might be. If/when mature, he will be more than capable of helping you to get your emotions/anxities into perspective. ... (Assuming that you have not left the relationship due to not confronting the issue created by the opposition of his Mars and your Saturn.)


5. his Pluto square your MC ... He can make you feel that you are under-achieving in your career. [Note the connection of career/MC (10th and work/NN (6th).]


6. his Pluto conjunct your north node ... He can help you to achieve the objectives of your Scorpio/6th North Node. {Note the connection of work/NN (6th) and career/MC (10th)]


7. his Ascendant square your Uranus ... This indicates a relationship which is based upon love at first sight - with both partners sensing an opportunity to explore their individuality by interacting with each other. ... The potential problem is that it becomes a relationship in which they cannot live without each other, but find it increasingly difficult to live with each other. ... And the root cause will be your (subconscious) fear that loving him poses a threat to your independence - causing you to behave in a way that will eventually makes him end the relationship "before he really gets hurt".


8. his Ascendant square your Neptune. ... Without realising, you may have put him on a pedestal - seeing all the best attributes of his Libra Ascendant (whether he has them or not) and few (if any) of the faults. ... So, the potential problem is that you might perceive him as a near-angelic being who needs to be protected from the harsh realities of life - and that opens a door for the kind of self deception that prevents "elephant in the room" issues from being confronted, which can eventually result in the relationship breaking down.

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

THE COMPOSITE

The 12th house Mercury is a "hidden enemy" in this chart, and competing with the Sun for rulership of it. ... So, note how its symbol stands on the Ascendant, looking like a Venus fly trap that is about to capture the Sun.

Since that image may be telling us that overthinking creates a barrier/threat to self-expression in this relationship, let's explore Mercury in more detail :-

1) It's close proximity to the Ascendant makes Mercury a contender for rulership of this chart. ... But, that role actually belongs to the Sun - which rules the Ascendant and disposals all of the inner/personal planets (including Mercury).

2) It is behind the Sun and (on the day of birth) the Moon was moving slowly in the charts of both partners. ... So, as a couple, you are "deliberate thinkers" - http://cafeastrology.com/articles/mentalchemistry.html - receiving and processing information slowly and deliberately.

3) Progressions and transits (through any sign) contact natal planets in the order of lowest-to-highest degree. And, in this composite chart that planetary order is Mars -> Moon -> Sun -> Venus -> Mercury -> Uranus -> Neptune -> Pluto -> Saturn -> Jupiter.

So, an event created by a progression/transit ... happens (Mars) -> generates an emotional/subjective response (Moon) -> which is then expressed (Sun) -> before being evaluated (Venus) -> and considered rationally/objectively (Mercury).

However ... if Mercury rules the chart/couple (rather than the Sun) ... nothing will be said/expressed until after it has been considered rationally/objectively.

But ... both Sun and Mercury are in the 12th house (of hidden psychological enemies) ... indicating that neither spontaneously expressing (Sun-ruler) nor deliberately suppressing (Mercury-ruler) the emotions (Moon) will produce a "healthy" relationship.

4. The Moon is exalted in Taurus, and the most visible planet in the chart (because it is closest to the MC). ... This obliges the Moon to "always be on best behaviour". ... So, my guess is that (for a psychologically healthy relationship) emotions should be released/expressed spontaneously - but with both partners being aware of the need to subsequently evaluate/rationalise them, and to be willing to bite-the-bullet of doing so.


___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

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efaki94
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Posts: 137
From: thessaloniki,greece
Registered: Jun 2020

posted October 15, 2020 04:27 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for efaki94     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Graham:
[b]THE DAVISON

As in all natal charts, the purpose is to "make the Sun shine" ... and, for this 6th house Aquarius Sun, my guess is that will be achieved if/when both partners "stop procrastinating".

But what is particularly interesting, efaki ... (because you noticed/picked-up the harmonics comments on other threads) ... is that Sun-Mars-Pluto are in a (very close-orbed, so very strong) 24th harmonic aspect triangle. ... [Coincidence? Serendipity? Or, activation of the current sextile from transit Saturn to Davison Pluto?] ... And the 24th harmonic = ease/pleasure in persisting with something - whilst Sun, Mars and Pluto are all in signs that point to the "something" being procrastination.

Then ... further astrological indicators of potential procrastination are ... Saturn in mutual reception with Uranus; the 3 minutes orb of the Uranus-Neptune conjunction (making these two planets "too close to separate") and the sequence/order in which progressions and transits activate both partners (Uranus->Neptune->Sun->Mercury->Saturn ... toning down the initial Uranus+Neptune urge to act/"rock-the-boat", until it becomes a rational/Mercury+Saturn decision to conform/"not-rock-the-boat".

Moreover ... there are other strong harmonic aspects in this chart that you/we might want to explore later ... Moon-Venus (9th harmonic) : Moon/Uranus+Neptune (10th harmonic) : Venus/Mars (7th harmonic) : Uranus-Neptune (every harmonic from 1st to 32nd) : and more.

However ... I now need feedback from you (on whether or not procrastination is a significant issue in this relationship).

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

THE SYNASTRY

Comments to be added

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

THE COMPOSITE

Comments to be added

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________[/B]


First thanks you so much for your time
Really thank you Graham.

About procrastinating
I'm not sure I get the meaning of it
But do you mean cancel things?
Well the truth is that he want to move in a home with me but I don't feel ready enough
But then I think it again and I think I want it. And I have changed my mind twice about that thing and he doesnt take it well saying I don't want him enough.
the last weeks after a lot of thinking
I decided to search for a job after 6 months unemployed
And take the risk and move with him.
But I have to find the right job first
And its not easy and I'm taking my time
I don't want to stress over it.
So yes there is definitely some procrastination especially in me


Also another issue is that when we argue
Which happens often
I am the one who wants to talk about it
And not just let it dissappear
And he act like nothing happen even some hours later.

Those harmonics sounds good but I don't have idea what could that mean.
Sun pluto mars sound really dynamic for example but how could they play out?
Also that venus moon seems good

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Graham
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Posts: 1768
From:
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posted October 16, 2020 01:29 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Graham     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
__________________________________________________ MY REPLIES TO FEEDBACK FROM EFAKI __________________________________________________


Originally posted by efaki (on 15 Oct 2020) :-

quote:
yes there is definitely some procrastination especially in me


Also another issue is that when we argue
Which happens often
I am the one who wants to talk about it
And not just let it dissappear
And he act like nothing happen even some hours later.



Thank you for confirming that procrastination is an issue in your relationship. ... And for pointing out the (related) issue of your partner's reluctance to engage in difficult/emotional "elephant-in-the-room" confrontations.


quote:
Those harmonics sounds good but I don't have idea what could that mean.
Sun pluto mars sound really dynamic for example but how could they play out?
Also that venus moon seems good


Venus-9H-Moon = a very loving and compatible relationship. ... Sun-Mars-Pluto = a mechanism for overcoming the issue of procrastination.

But, before looking at the davison in more depth, my intention is to take an initial/superficial look at the synastry (and perhaps the composite) ... because that might reveal something which helps me to better interpret the davison chart's astrological indicators.
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Originally posted by efaki on 16th October 2020 :-

quote:
Glad to here for that good aspect between venus and moon.
Is it truth that venus and moon represent
The female in composite? Or both of the couple?


Venus and Moon represent values and emotions ... which can apply to either (or both) of the partners.


quote:
[/b]
In synastry :
The first thing that worry me is
My saturn opposite his stellium in virgo.
This stellium falls in my 4th and I can relate to the things that others saying about this house.
We enjoy home moments... I have a good relationship with his family but he isn't so close to mine I tend to avoid it to be honest.[/b]

The issue here is that you "tend to avoid it". Better to confront/discuss the issue, and then agree upon how it is to be handled (by each of you) in the future.


quote:
Another thing is that my venus don't have any aspect in his personal planets expect an contraparallel to his pluto.

The absence of personal-to-personal planet contacts are unlikely to have a significant impact upon relationships. ... So, stop worrying about this.

quote:
By the way I can tell if it falls in his 11th or 12th because it seems really close to his 12th.

Your natal Venus is in his natal 11th house.

quote:
Also my mars only contra parallel his uranus and sesqui quadrate his saturn.

Contra-parallel and sesquiquadrate aspects between inner and outer planets are likely to have a significant impact upon the relationship.


quote:
My chiron conjuct his stellium in virgo
Which I can feel the most of the time
He is the first person which I really
Feel that cares for me deeply.


Chiron contacts to a partner's personal planets will have a significant impact upon the relationship.


quote:
Also my moon in his 8th contra parallel and trine his saturn.. Square his stellium in virgo. which I'm not sure how could play out. I have read that this house have a plutonic sense.

I have not considered parallel and contra-parallel aspects, but these are likely to have a significant impact if made by the outer planets of one partner to the inner planets of the other.

Pluto is the natural ruler of the 8th, so the activities of that house are indeed "plutonic".


quote:
Also I can feel his moon in my 11th because we can be true Friends expect from couple.

Yes.


quote:
For the composite :

I think that this trine of venus moon and uranus/neptune seems great and may soften other bad aspects.

There is also that t square of pluto saturn and chiron which from what I heard is a toxic one aspect. I think it could play out like big ego from both of us and especially when we argue there is a big need for each one to be the one right and to prove oneself to the other. (by the way sorry for my English hope all of this make sense)

Pluto in 4th moon in 10th and the stellium in 12th catch my eye but I don't know how to interpret them.


My guess is the composite chart confirms that (for this to be a psychologically healthy relationship) emotions should be released/expressed spontaneously - but with both partners being aware of the need to subsequently evaluate/rationalise them, and to be willing to bite-the-bullet of doing so.

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efaki94
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Posts: 137
From: thessaloniki,greece
Registered: Jun 2020

posted October 16, 2020 05:44 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for efaki94     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Graham:
__________________________________________________ [b]MY REPLIES TO FEEDBACK FROM EFAKI ____________________________________________
Thank you for confirming that procrastination is an issue in your relationship. ... And for pointing out the (related) issue of your partner's reluctance to engage in difficult/emotional "elephant-in-the-room" confrontations.

Venus-9H-Moon = a very loving and compatible relationship. ... Sun-Mars-Pluto = a mechanism for overcoming the issue of procrastination.

But, before looking at the davison in more depth, my intention is to take an initial/superficial look at the synastry (and perhaps the composite) ... because that might reveal something which helps me to better interpret the davison chart's astrological indicators.
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________[/B]


Glad to here for that good aspect between venus and moon.
Is it truth that venus and moon represent
The female in composite? Or both of the couple?


To be honest I'm not very good to interpret a chart.. The things I know is what I have read on internet and what other members of this forum (like stoika and Todd) have told me.

Ill give it a try.
In synastry :
The first thing that worry me is
My saturn opposite his stellium in virgo.
This stellium falls in my 4th and I can relate to the things that others saying
About this house.
We enjoy home moments... I have a good relationship with his family
But he isn't so close to mine I tend to avoid it to be honest.


Another thing is that my venus don't have any aspect in his personal planets
Expect an contraparallel to his pluto.
By the way I can tell if it falls in his 11th or 12th because it seems really close to his 12th.

Also my mars only contra parallel his uranus and sesqui quadrate his saturn.

My chiron conjuct his stellium in virgo
Which I can feel the most of the time
He is the first person which I really
Feel that cares for me deeply.

Also my moon in his 8th contra parallel and trine his saturn.. Square his stellium in virgo. which I'm not sure how could play out. I have read that this house have a plutonic sense.

Also I can feel his moon in my 11th because we can be true Friends expect from couple.


For the composite :
I think that this trine of venus moon and uranus/neptune seems great and may Soften
Other bad aspects.

There is also that t square of pluto saturn and chiron which from what I heard is a toxic one aspect. I think it could play out like big ego from both of us and especially when we argue there is a big need for each one to be the one right and to prove oneself to the other. (by the way sorry for my English hope all of this make sense)

Pluto in 4th moon in 10th and the stellium in 12th catch my eye but I don't know how to interpret them.


Thank you for your interest again 🙏

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Graham
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posted October 17, 2020 04:16 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Graham     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote

To keep all my analyses in one "reply" space on this thread, I shall keep returning/adding to the 4th reply space on this thread - until stating there that "my analysis is now completed".

In the meantime, please "watch that space" for any updates by me, and ask any questions that you have as/when they arise (but also in only one reply space, reserved specifically for your questions about my analyses.) ... And, I shall keep returning/adding to the 6th reply space to answer them/respond to your feedback.

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efaki94
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From: thessaloniki,greece
Registered: Jun 2020

posted October 18, 2020 06:49 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for efaki94     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
REPLY SPACE


OK GRAHAM
I'll keep this space for my Feedback t you.

THE SYNASTRY

1. his Venus conjunct your Chiron ... His Venus-in-Virgo/11th way of socially interacting with others may (subconsciously) remind you of the difficulty you experienced when socially interacting with others (during childhood and adolescence. So, if you cannot handle that, the potential problem here is that you will try to change/suppress his natural behaviour (rather than grasp the opportunity to experience/explore/confront your childhood-conditioned emotional pain). And, in not allowing/encouraging him to behave naturally (or to "be himself"), you will sow the slow-growling seed of a relationship breakdown in the future.


I'm not sure I had socially interacting problems when I was younger
I think I was cooler than today. Haha
But sometimes yes I feel that he is
So social and can handle a big group of people and I'm more introvert and little jealous of that. You are right sometimes
I suppress him. Don't know why.

2. his Mars opposite your Saturn ... With this contact, the Saturn partner often states (as you do, in reply 2) "in the beginning of the relationship he was more close to me and I was more independent, and now it the completely opposite with me being very clingy and pressing".

This is because sexually-orientated Mars perceives the cool/controlled Saturn as a hard-to-win potential partner, and the Saturn person sees in Mars a spontaneous expression of passion/sexuality (which Saturn herself/himself feels he/she lacks). ... Thus, Mars makes Saturn feel like "a complete person".

Hence, the potential problem here is that the initial passion of Mars (inevitably) cools when the partner has been "won" - and the cooling of that passion causes Saturn to feel "incomplete". So, when (not if) this happens, Saturn punishes Mars by leaving the relationship (i.e.. depriving him/her of their hard won trophy - and thus, reigniting their initial desire/passion to have Saturn as a partner). ... Tragic/ironic, since both partners may still be very much in love.

Thats totally true. He was all over me when i firstly met him. Couldnt keep his hands of me. Now I feel like he still wants me but if I deny having sex with him he
Will be more turned on than if I just have sex with him.
3. his Mars conjunct your Chiron ... Same issue as with his Venus conjunct your Chiron - but compounded by him being able to treat everyone as "people" (rather than males/men and females/women).


4. his Saturn trine your Moon. ... This is a benevolent aspect that is capable of holding the relationship together, no matter what other issues there might be. If/when mature, he will be more than capable of helping you to get your emotions/anxities into perspective. ... (Assuming that you have not left the relationship due to not confronting the issue created by the opposition of his Mars and your Saturn.)

The most of the time he is very supportive
But when we argue is like this saturn contra parallel my moon play out.
Like he can't understand the way I feel
And being cold and distant.
5. his Pluto square your MC ... He can make you feel that you are under-achieving in your career. [Note the connection of career/MC (10th and work/NN (6th).]

Couldn't describe it better
Sometimes he makes comments
Bacause I don't have a Carrer plan
Like he do. Also he works for many hours a day and now that I'm unemployed he takes the opportunity to say that to me and make me feel a little bad about it.

6. his Pluto conjunct your north node ... He can help you to achieve the objectives of your Scorpio/6th North Node. {Note the connection of work/NN (6th) and career/MC (10th)]

Thats sounds nice. Hope t see it play out.

7. his Ascendant square your Uranus ... This indicates a relationship which is based upon love at first sight - with both partners sensing an opportunity to explore their individuality by interacting with each other. ... The potential problem is that it becomes a relationship in which they cannot live without each other, but find it increasingly difficult to live with each other. ... And the root cause will be your (subconscious) fear that loving him poses a threat to your independence - causing you to behave in a way that will eventually makes him end the relationship "before he really gets hurt".


Thats what we experince the last months
He talks about family kids and living together
And I want to leave my family home first find a new job and be independent again.
I think I'm too young to talk about these things but he keeps pressing me about it.
I can't break up with him but can't hide my needs.

8. his Ascendant square your Neptune. ... Without realising, you may have put him on a pedestal - seeing all the best attributes of his Libra Ascendant (whether he has them or not) and few (if any) of the faults. ... So, the potential problem is that you might perceive him as a near-angelic being who needs to be protected from the harsh realities of life - and that opens a door for the kind of self deception that prevents "elephant in the room" issues from being confronted, which can eventually result in the relationship breaking down.

Yeah definitely I have idealise him. I tend to idealise all my boyfriend for some reason. But I think he is the one who try to protect me from the harsh reality.

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

THE COMPOSITE

The 12th house Mercury is a "hidden enemy" in this chart, and competing with the Sun for rulership of it. ... So, note how its symbol stands on the Ascendant, looking like a Venus fly trap that is about to capture the Sun.


Since that image may be telling us that overthinking creates a barrier/threat to self-expression in this relationship, let's explore Mercury in more detail :-

I WOULD SAY tha im the one that overthinks
everything
and he use to tell me that i should
live in here and now and not playing different scenarios in my mind.

1) It's close proximity to the Ascendant makes Mercury a contender for rulership of this chart. ... But, that role actually belongs to the Sun - which rules the Ascendant and disposals all of the inner/personal planets (including Mercury).

2) It is behind the Sun and (on the day of birth) the Moon was moving slowly in the charts of both partners. ... So, as a couple, you are "deliberate thinkers" - http://cafeastrology.com/articles/mentalchemistry.html - receiving and processing information slowly and deliberately.

3) Progressions and transits (through any sign) contact natal planets in the order of lowest-to-highest degree. And, in this composite chart that planetary order is Mars -> Moon -> Sun -> Venus -> Mercury -> Uranus -> Neptune -> Pluto -> Saturn -> Jupiter.

SORRY IM NOT SURE I GOT THE MEANING OF THIS EXPLANATION

So, an event created by a progression/transit ... happens (Mars) -> generates an emotional/subjective response (Moon) -> which is then expressed (Sun) -> before being evaluated (Venus) -> and considered rationally/objectively (Mercury).

However ... if Mercury rules the chart/couple (rather than the Sun) ... nothing will be said/expressed until after it has been considered rationally/objectively.

But ... both Sun and Mercury are in the 12th house (of hidden psychological enemies) ... indicating that neither spontaneously expressing (Sun-ruler) nor deliberately suppressing (Mercury-ruler) the emotions (Moon) will produce a "healthy" relationship.


IF I GOT IT RIGHT
WE DONT HAVE THE BEST COMMUNICATION
each of us try to dominate the conversation
when we argue
when we have different perspectives on things
we try to mind-wash the other.
and like i said before
im the one who wants to analyse and talk about every issue
and he is the one who refuse
and just act like these issues doesnt exist
or by saying that conversation want help
to slove these problems.

4. The Moon is exalted in Taurus, and the most visible planet in the chart (because it is closest to the MC). ... This obliges the Moon to "always be on best behaviour". ... So, my guess is that (for a psychologically healthy relationship) emotions should be released/expressed spontaneously - but with both partners being aware of the need to subsequently evaluate/rationalise them, and to be willing to bite-the-bullet of doing so.
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________


another question
about davison
pluto in 4th and venus in 8th seems good?
because they say that water houses show deep bond??

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Graham
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posted October 19, 2020 01:03 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Graham     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
The Davison Venus-Pluto trine is a really nice aspect. ... Transformational Pluto is "at home" in analytical Scorpio and comfortable in 4th house of psychological foundations ... Venus is exalted in Pisces and comfortable in 8th house of other people's values.

So, this trine provides a mechanism for each of you to respectfully transform the values of the other. ... But, that will not happen if he continues to believe that "talking does not help".

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efaki94
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posted October 19, 2020 02:38 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for efaki94     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Sounds nice
But you are right
There is that issue with communication

Do you think that this mars opposite neptune
Urnaus is to wide to play out in our relationship?
Because I heard is a cheating aspect??

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Graham
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posted October 21, 2020 01:30 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Graham     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by efaki94:
Sounds nice
But you are right
There is that issue with communication

Do you think that this mars opposite neptune
Urnaus is to wide to play out in our relationship?
Because I heard is a cheating aspect??

I think it is indeed too wide to be affecting your relationship.

But ... if you confront problems, and he avoids them ... why are you torturing yourself (by living with your fear that he might be cheating) rather than confronting him directly about this elephant-in-the-room issue?

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efaki94
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posted October 22, 2020 03:38 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for efaki94     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Graham:
I think it is indeed too wide to be affecting your relationship.

But ... if you confront problems, and he avoids them ... why are you torturing yourself (by living with your fear that he might be cheating) rather than confronting him directly about this elephant-in-the-room issue?



Well you have a point here.
I have discuss this issue so many times
Especially when we argue I keep trying to
Talk about the thing that happened but as I want to solve the problem he keeps trying to avoid it and I keep pushing him and goes that way.
So I don't think it will ever change.
Maybe if I will be more sweet and not so pressing when I do that.


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Graham
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posted October 22, 2020 04:05 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Graham     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by efaki94:

Well you have a point here.
I have discuss this issue so many times
Especially when we argue I keep trying to
Talk about the thing that happened but as I want to solve the problem he keeps trying to avoid it and I keep pushing him and goes that way.
So I don't think it will ever change.
Maybe if I will be more sweet and not so pressing when I do that.


When raising "the thing that happened", what are you trying to confront/talk about though? ... Him actually cheating - or you suspecting/fearing that he cheated?

Or ... to put it another way ... are you pushing for a discussion about him, rather than for a discussion about you (or/and the relationship)?

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posted October 23, 2020 03:58 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Graham     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote

My analysis of the Davison, Synastry and Composite charts is now completed, efaki. ... But do you still have questions that I have not yet answered?

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efaki94
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posted October 25, 2020 09:42 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for efaki94     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Graham:
When raising "the thing that happened", what are you trying to confront/talk about though? ... Him [b]actually cheating - or you suspecting/fearing that he cheated?

Or ... to put it another way ... are you pushing for a discussion about him, rather than for a discussion about you (or/and the relationship)?

[/B]



Graham sorry I didnt reply earlier.
I didn't have internet access.
I think I do the second one
I suspecting fearing that he cheated or he will.
For example the next week he will start
Teaching other people driving to take driver license.
The majority of that people will be young one and I explained to him that I'm jealous of that but I said it in a sweet
Kind way without complain.
He said that nothing has happen yet so
It's not necessary to worry about it and to talk about it.
I said that I just want him to calm with his words and just to talk about my feelings.
Then we started arguing about that
With him saying that I discuss something that doesn't even exist and with me complaining that he doesn't get me.
Hope this makes sense.

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efaki94
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posted October 25, 2020 09:46 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for efaki94     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Graham:

My analysis of the Davison, Synastry and Composite charts is now completed, efaki. ... But do you still have questions that I have not yet answered?


Thank you so much for your time Graham.
You really helped here.
I want to ask you about declination.
Do I have to consider them?
We have 2 harsh aspects venus contraparallel pluto
Which I have read that means a lot of manipulation and separation
And saturn contraparallel moon which means
Distance and coldness??
He is the outer planet in both aspects

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Graham
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posted October 25, 2020 12:33 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Graham     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by efaki94:

Graham sorry I didnt reply earlier.
I didn't have internet access.
I think I do the second one
I suspecting fearing that he cheated or he will.
For example the next week he will start
Teaching other people driving to take driver license.
The majority of that people will be young one and I explained to him that I'm jealous of that but I said it in a sweet
Kind way without complain.
He said that nothing has happen yet so
It's not necessary to worry about it and to talk about it.
I said that I just want him to calm with his words and just to talk about my feelings.
Then we started arguing about that
With him saying that I discuss something that doesn't even exist and with me complaining that he doesn't get me.
Hope this makes sense.


Not only does it make sense, it confirms that the main problem in this relationship is your FEAR rather than him/his behaviour or anything he has actually done.

So ... the solution is for you to confront those childhood-conditioned fears ... with a friend, therapist or another third-party that he is ok with you doing so.

However ... if you allow him to prevent you from exploring those fears (either with him or someone else) ... "what is within you and not brought out will eventually destroy this relationship".

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Graham
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posted October 25, 2020 12:59 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Graham     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by efaki94:

Thank you so much for your time Graham.
You really helped here.
I want to ask you about declination.
Do I have to consider them?
We have 2 harsh aspects venus contraparallel pluto
Which I have read that means a lot of manipulation and separation
And saturn contraparallel moon which means
Distance and coldness??
He is the outer planet in both aspects


Contraparallel aspects manifest like oppositions. ... And a Pluto-Venus opposition can cause him to attempt to control your physical appearance (or values), whilst Saturn-Moon can cause the him to respond harshly/unkindly to your need for constant reassurance about your emotions/feeling/fears.

Both of these things are indeed apparent in this relationship ... but he does not yet seem to be ready to see that they are caused by the childhood-conditioning of BOTH of you. ... So, at this stage, you have to focus 100% upon changing your own behaviour (by confronting your own subconscious fears) rather than upon changing him.

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efaki94
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posted October 25, 2020 03:34 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for efaki94     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote

Well I had a therapist 1 year ago
But I didn't felt very understood
I also felt bad sometimes with her words so I stopped seeing her.
My bf knew about that and he hadn't told me anything bad about it he was OK with that. Now I tend to talk with my friend.

You must be right but the thing is I can't
Always see if it is my fear that take me to these situations with him OR if my suspicions are right. Sorry for my English.

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efaki94
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posted October 25, 2020 03:40 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for efaki94     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I'm Not sure about the appearance but he
Definitely try to change my values about family relationships kids etc.
As for saturn moon I totally relate to your words.

You think is our childhood that causes these situations?
Is it obvious to our charts?


Also could I ask you about
composite venus/mars midpoint
Square pluto
Opposite saturn
And conjuct chiron??
Other members have told me that it's a very harsh combination

By the way composite moon parallel chiron
Could Soften these aspects?

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Graham
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posted October 26, 2020 03:05 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Graham     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by efaki94:

Well I had a therapist 1 year ago
But I didn't felt very understood
I also felt bad sometimes with her words so I stopped seeing her.
My bf knew about that and he hadn't told me anything bad about it he was OK with that. Now I tend to talk with my friend.

You must be right but the thing is I can't
Always see if it is my fear that take me to these situations with him OR if my suspicions are right. Sorry for my English.


You probably felt bad because the therapy was making you conscious/aware of something that is buried in your subconscious mind ... and you were not yet ready to confront whatever that was.

However, experiencing painful emotions is a part of the process of identifying (and confronting/dealing with) the root cause of them. ... And it is psychologically safer to do that with a trained therapist than with an untrained partner or friend.

At the moment though, you just need to ensure you do not allow your partner's belief (that "there is nothing to discuss") to prevent you from confronting/talking out your subconscious fears with someone.

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Graham
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posted October 26, 2020 03:10 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Graham     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Originally posted by efaki :-

quote:
I'm Not sure about the appearance but he
Definitely try to change my values about family relationships kids etc.
As for saturn moon I totally relate to your words.
You think is our childhood that causes these situations?
Is it obvious to our charts?


Yes ... I do think these situations are caused by emotionally painful events that happened in childhood.

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efaki94
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posted October 26, 2020 03:20 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for efaki94     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
[QUOTE]Originally posted by Graham:
You probably felt bad because the therapy was making you conscious/aware of something that is buried in your subconscious mind ... and you were not yet ready to confront whatever that was.

However, experiencing painful emotions is a part of the process of identifying (and confronting/dealing with) the root cause of them. ... And it is psychologically safer to do that with a trained therapist than with an untrained partner or friend.

At the moment though, you just need to ensure you do not allow your partner's belief (that "there is nothing to discuss") to prevent you from confronting/talking out your subconscious fears with someone.[/QUOTE


Off course not
I feel it deep down in my heart
That there is something to discuss
It may has not anything to do with him
But I know it's there.


Graham thank you again so much for your time and your interest.

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