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Author Topic:   I need help if he's that into me - he said he is but I don't feel it
SimplyLuna
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posted November 01, 2021 10:32 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for SimplyLuna     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
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athenaia
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posted November 01, 2021 11:56 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for athenaia     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Well... the situation is only going to get worse because transit Saturn is inching that much closer to your giant Aquarius stellium in the composite. Things should actually be amazing right now because transit Saturn is not yet in orb to the composite Venus, and transit Jupiter is currently conjunct c. Mars, c. DSC, and opposite c. Moon.

You are the Aries Sun/Libra Moon, right?

I think that in so many ways he is your ideal partner since your DSC is in Capricorn and he's putting his stellium on your DSC/7th house, but they (more often than not) are very, very cold in relationships (yes, there are always exceptions but lets be real, they're exceptions for a reason). I am a Capricorn connoisseur, I've dated SO many of them and honestly it's very rare (especially for Capricorn stelliums like this dude) to melt the sheet of ice that surrounds their heart and to get into the gooey center.

Your Libra Moon in the 5th (I am a fellow air moon in H5) needs happiness, sweetness, light-heartedness, big romantic gestures, words of affirmation, thoughtful gifts, eskimos kisses, beautiful nights out on the town, you need your heart to SING - a Gemini/Cap dude is likely not going to be it. I've been dating someone all year that's a Gem Sun/Venus/Jupiter with a Cap ASC/Moon/Saturn/Neptune/Uranus and yeah, they are workaholics and prefer to keep things as surface level as possible, not matter how much you work to create a loving, romantic ambiance to get lost in

Plus his Moon is in your 12th so maybe... just maybe, let's say he does love you more than he's ever loved anyone else. Maybe this is true. But due to the nature of the 12th house, you're not gonna feel it. Not with an Aries Venus (I am also an Aries Venus) and an Air Moon in H5. We want passion, obsession, a fun chase... and I must say, as a fellow Venus in Aries, I have not found Aries Mars men to really be my cup of tea for some strange reason.

Also the Saturn/Venus in the synastry could mean long term devotion, yeah, but it is quite dry.

I noticed this guy was born in China, perhaps he's expressing cultural affection in a way you just find unsatisfactory?

Tbh I say cut your losses but ultimately it's up to you. You should still be in the honeymoon phase of this relationship and like I said, the transits are only going to make this more dreary and they haven't even activated yet

Also, I feel like it's important to mention that you wanted to put in the motions for a breakup and he rationalized that away, saying he wants to stay together, and you agreed. *Has* his behavior changed at all since this talk? If not..

Honestly, last year I got into a relationship and initially I thought it would be great (our synastry/composite was and I was very attracted to them), but it fell flat for me. About 5 months in I wanted to break up, the person said no no and convinced me not to. I stayed in that relationship for 14 months and its one of my biggest regrets. If you ever want to leave a relationship because you don't feel loved, don't look at the astrology. Listen to how you feel inside. Not feeling loved is a VERY big deal this early into a relationship and your emotions are trying to tell you something serious.

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AlmaRegulus
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posted November 02, 2021 06:46 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for AlmaRegulus     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I think it's a major Pluto-Uranus conflict.

You have Moon widely conjunct Pluto (and from your description it seems that the orb close to 7* is quite functional), and he has Sun-Uranus tight conjunction. So despite all Cappy stuff he also needs Aqua space.

As someone with a lot of Aqua and yet some Scorpio, I can't imagine wanting to spend an HOUR by phone with someone even if I were completely obsessed with him and would actually spend more time obsessing about our synastry. Especially if it's something planned like a chore. I mean if it happens and the talk is so interesting, it can last way longer, but planning for it??!

Your Venus is on his Dsc & Mars, so he might be quite sincere about feelings for you. Your Jupiter on his North Node is nice. Your composite is nicely shaped. Even with Saturn transits you will also have Jupiter transiting in your 7th house, so not necessarily things would get worse. And Saturn could give commitment. Is there any way you could move closer to each other?

And in Venus-Saturn you are actually Saturn, so it's him who might feel unloved or constrained.

What might be difficult is your Asc-Dsc axis on his Chiron-Saturn opposition. I don't have a good grasp of it but you might research more into it. Either way it's not something easy to have on Asc-Dsc.

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anska5
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posted November 02, 2021 08:58 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for anska5     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
It sounds to me this feeling of not getting enough love/feeling of scarcity is down to your mutual saturn synastry. His saturn on your mars and dc, your saturn on bis venus.Also his moon falling in your 12th house may make it difficult for you to grasp his emotions/level of feeling.
And no, I definitely don't think it's because he has a stellium in capricorn. I'm a triple capricorn (sun, mercury, venus) and I am not cold, in fact most capricorns, when they commit are anything but cold and very sensual. It's such a cliche. To me it sounds exactly like the situation I had with my triple Aries boyfriend (Sun, moon, venus in aries) back at college. Only the roles were reversed then: I as the capricorn was the one who felt completely neglected by him due to his 24/7 work schedule. (was drowning in work, studying for his phd and working on the side.) Hindsight is 20/20 but it is clear now, that he indeed truly loved me, actually loved me more than I did, but the constant nagging due to me feeling neglected and then the relationship turned into a long distance relationship, killed it in the end.

I would trust his declaration that he is in love, but given that it sounds his crazy hours are going to continue, I'm not sure your venus in aries will be happy in the long rund.

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athenaia
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posted November 02, 2021 03:31 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for athenaia     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Gee anska5, it's almost like you're a woman and women are socialized to be more emotionally expressive than men, even when they're Capricorns. Plus I said that of course there are exceptions.

Look, I have no idea what I've done to you, but throughout the years on this forum you always have passive aggressive things to say to my posts. I have no idea why! If I've ever offended you, I'm very sorry about that. Certainly wasn't intentional. But these little pithy quips to my posts are getting old. I always admire and respect the things you say personally. Just wanna put that out there.

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anska5
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posted November 02, 2021 05:20 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for anska5     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
@athenia,
Jesus, I honestly have no idea who you are, I'm rarely on here, so I don't have the various user names on radar with the exception of people like Stoika and Randall If you feel that I'm picking on your comments (and over the years???) it's in no way intentional and purely coincidental. Given that from your comment you have not a great rapport with capricorns anyway, take it just as another sign of incompatibility with capricorns if a capricorn (me) keeps disgreeing with your comments (from your point of view).P.S. all I said is that it's a cliche that capricorns are cold which is true (the cliche) as I keep reading it. And by the way didn't I pinpoint also like you the moon in her 12th as one of the culprits. If you are on a forum it's a given that a number of people will disagree with you, it's not personal.

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SimplyLuna
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posted November 02, 2021 07:39 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for SimplyLuna     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
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GalacticCoreExplosionV2
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posted November 02, 2021 08:40 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for GalacticCoreExplosionV2     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I both folks above.

Perhaps I am an exception with having Cap Sun and Merc, but am definitely quite an exception. Burning white hot center, though I can temporarily make self quite cold and detached.

As to Luna and her connection, Saturn closely conjunct another's Venus can be tough at times. Sometimes the Saturn person, though they don't mean to, can have a heart closing/constricting effect on the Venus person. It can be due to various reasons, but usually it relates to the fears and insecurities of the Saturn person. Saturn person can demand overtures of affection, time, etc due to these, and it can feel or become a bit overbearing or heavy feeling to the Venus person. Sometimes the Venus person will seem or feel a bit shallow or not as committed, to the Saturn person.

If the couple can work through these, and deal with the core and real issues, then a real depth and consistency of connection can develop.

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SimplyLuna
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posted November 02, 2021 09:21 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for SimplyLuna     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
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SimplyLuna
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posted November 02, 2021 10:08 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for SimplyLuna     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hey all,

I think I know what I need to do from here on. I appreciate the astrollectual insights.

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Stoika7
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posted November 03, 2021 01:33 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Stoika7     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hi SimplyLuna!

I think he feels a bond a with you, his Saturn is conjunct to your DSC, and north node is conjunct to your Jupiter square your Saturn... let alone your Venus conjunct his DSC. You seem to trigger a lot of insecurity though in his life balance... his Chiron is conjunct your ASC and opposite his Saturn, and he has Mercury in the third house square Mars, so he's likely insecure and can't find a way to express his feelings, which results in "coldness" (his Moon opposite your Uranus)....

Composite Moon/Saturn midpoint is opposite Jupiter square Lilith and this shows devotion and committment expectations, but also that there may be unconscious dynamics making things emotionally unstable. Moon/Jupiter midpoint is conjunct Chiron in 10th house and opposite Saturn in 4th house... this is the emotional distance you feel, likely the Chiron midpoint in the 10th house shows career matters interferring with the stability of the relationship, but this can also turn out as a very intimate aspect the more the two get intimately closer and committed. The nodes are square Neptune and this is usually a sign of indecisiveness and that the direction and future of the relationship is unclear... The stellium in the sixth house sextile Jupiter actually suggests that the relationship can work out with more dedication and it requires some "work" and patience to develope positively.
At this time transiting Saturn is square to Composite Pluto, so it's a test, transiting Jupiter is conjunct DSC opposite Moon, so I think you may have to take the chance for this test to sort things out, get to know each other closely and understand where the other comes from and make things clearer. Transiting Uranus retrograde square the stellium is making things pretty unstable and unpredictable... Honestly I don't think this will be long term, because transiting Neptune is square to Saturn and when transiting Jupiter is square to Saturn and the nodes square to the stellium, you may break up. It seems bad timing to me, according to the transits, cause the Composite itself shows potential loving committment... maybe if you endure despite this instability you may find a balance with time, but it requires accepting the differences between you two while building a much more "grounded" intimacy.

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AlmaRegulus
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posted November 03, 2021 05:46 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for AlmaRegulus     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
SimplyLuna, if you want to pass this instability period a remedy might be making your own life extremely busy. Maybe that's what Cappy Dsc is calling you for! This way you will find a partner within yourself.

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SimplyLuna
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posted November 03, 2021 09:27 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for SimplyLuna     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
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Stoika7
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posted November 03, 2021 11:22 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Stoika7     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hey SimplyLuna ❤️ I can imagine how you feel!

Chiron oppposite Saturn/Uranus can actually point to "bad timing"... and an overall instability of the relationship which doesn't change over time. But to me it depends more on the transits at this time, cause there are other elements in the chart itself which may work out. Transiting Neptune square Saturn is adding a lot of unclear dynamic to the already uncertain vibe of Neptune square the nodes... this is a very spiritual, romantic, idealistic and platonic aspect, but also casting a big question mark on everything. The problem is that transiting Neptune (square saturn) is retrograde and it's veryyy slooow... (I'm having this square my natal MC and I feel lost since so long, not knowing literally anymore why I am on this planet!). So this transit is unfortunately taking long before getting direct and leaving the square to Saturn... and then Pluto square Saturn add a blocking energy to this insecurity. Maybe you (both) need to understand more deeply the feelings for each other and how much you're willing to "work" and be patient in order to keep your relationship...

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SimplyLuna
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posted November 04, 2021 05:00 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for SimplyLuna     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
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GalacticCoreExplosionV2
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posted November 07, 2021 10:12 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for GalacticCoreExplosionV2     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by SimplyLuna:
GalacticCoreExplosionV2,

Saturn demanding more affection and time from the Venus person? I thought it was Saturn who denies it. That really sucks if I am the damper. But wouldn't my Jupiter square to his Venus ease this Saturn?

I just "text" it out with him, he said he feels a distance from me just how I am with him when we are apart. But how can someone feel close over texting. Wouldn't you want to put an effort to see them in person? He doesn't like phonecalls/video calls so I don't know anymore. I think I'm out of ideas how to get to the root of the problem. Maybe this is a LDR issue now and working a lot combination now. I'm losing... hope in us (5th moon house problem being dramatic)


I've seen it go both ways. Yes, the Jupiter square can counterbalance some of that Saturnian heaviness.

I can't speak for others, but yes, if I felt attracted to and close with someone, I would want to spend in physical time with them, and while I'm not a huge fan of phone time, I would do that at least occasionally over just texting only. Unfortunately, a percentage of men have heart openness issues. And it often manifests in communication.

In any case, hoping for your highest long term good, SimplyLuna.

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SimplyLuna
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posted November 08, 2021 05:04 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for SimplyLuna     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
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Randall
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posted November 19, 2021 05:08 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Bump!

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