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T O P I C R E V I E WEleanoreSomeday when my children are old enough tounderstand the logic that motivates a parent, I willtell them, as my Mean Mom told me: I loved youenough . . to ask where you were going, with whom,and what time you would be home. I loved you enough to be silent and let youdiscover that your new best friend was a creep. I loved you enough to make you go pay for thebubble gum you had taken and tell the clerk, "Istole this yesterday and want to pay for it." I loved you enough to stand over you for two hourswhile you cleaned your room, a job that should havetaken 15 minutes. I loved you enough to let you see anger,disappointment, and tears in my eyes. Children mustlearn that their parents aren't perfect. I loved you enough to let you assume theresponsibility for your actions even when thepenalties were so harsh they almost broke my heart. But most of all, I loved you enough . . . to sayNO when I knew you would hate me for it. Those were the most difficult battles of all. I'mglad I won them, because in the end you won, too.And someday when your children are old enough tounderstand the logic that motivates parents, youwill tell them. Was your Mom mean? I know mine was. We had themeanest mother in the whole world! While other kidsate candy for breakfast, we had to have cereal,eggs, and toast. When others had a Pepsi and aTwinkie for lunch, we had to eat sandwiches. And youcan guess our mother fixed us a dinner that wasdifferent from what other kids had, too. Mother insisted on knowing where we were at alltimes. You'd think we were convicts in a prison. Shehad to know who our friends were, and what we weredoing with them. She insisted that if we said wewould be gone for an hour, we would be gone for anhour or less. We were ashamed to admit it, but she had the nerveto break the Child Labor Laws by making us work. Wehad to wash the dishes, make the beds, learn tocook, vacuum the floor, do laundry, empty the trashand all sorts of cruel jobs. I think she would lieawake at night thinking of more things for us to do. She always insisted on us telling the truth, thewhole truth, and nothing but the truth. By the timewe were teenagers, she could read our minds and hadeyes in the back of her head. Then, life was reallytough! Mother wouldn't let our friends just honk the hornwhen they drove up. They had to come up to the doorso she could meet them. While everyone else coulddate when they were 12 or 13, we had to wait untilwe were 16. Because of our mother we missed out on lots ofthings other kids experienced. None of us have everbeen caught shoplifting, vandalizing other'sproperty or ever arrested for any crime. It was allher fault. Now that we have left home, we are all educated,honest adults. We are doing our best to be meanparents just like Mom was. I think that is what's wrong with the world today.It just doesn't have enough mean moms! ------------------"To learn is to live, to study is to grow, and growth is the measurement of life. The mind must be taught to think, the heart to feel, and the hands to labor. When these have been educated to their highest point, then is the time to offer them to the service of their fellowman, not before." - Manly P. HallRainbow~ sue gI would replace the word "mean" with kind.....Mean has a very negative connotation.....like with Mr Scrooge.......mean: miserly, ungenerous, petty dispicable, callous...I would not want my son to go on to be "mean" to his children.......kind but firm would be more appropriate noreenzHI SUE!!!! well, I'm all for mean moms, in fact I pride myself on being a "meany mommy" lol, it was always a joke I had with my children, their friends and my neices and nephews. When asked "Whose the meanist Mommy?" replies varied, "You are", "Meany Nee-nee" (Nee-nee, short for Noreen) "Auntie MeanyNee-nee"!!! "Yes children you are correct, and don't you forget it", lol ....Bows. Azalaksh(apologies to soozi, but.....) I got my Black Belt recently in the Meanest Mom in the Universe Tournament..... Thanks Eleanore!'Zalasue gAAaaah wellI always did stand apart from the crowd.....hahahhaha !!!And how can the lovewoman be "mean".....nah they dont really go together do they guys? love and kindnessxxxxx1scorp That is the perfect truth. My mom (a strong Taurus) was (is) very much what was described. Some of my extended family thought she was "mean". Yeah, I may have had a lot rules and guidelines to adhere to when I was a kid... but I love her for it. She taught me responsibility, respect, and discipline. Now when I see her with my lil' Aqua and they butt heads ... I just laugh... I'm always grateful and awe of this woman.I still wrestle with some of the necessary tough love that comes with being a mom. This post helped. ___________________________________________Scorpio sun, venus, mars, mercury, and uranusLibra moon, pluto, and asc. pinkfairyOI met themostwonderfulof young men a while agoand askedwhataccountedfor hiscalm andkinddispositionhe said"Omy motherI supposeshe wasalways sokindandgentle andwhen shedid haveto say noI couldalways seelove in hereyes.....Onomeanmummythere !!OWaterNymphOooooooooooh I never thought I would ever say this…but I’m glad my mum did what she did Shock horror right? Of course she’s not perfect…and as a result, I’m not perfect. But I love her for it And if I have kids, I’ll tell them I had the most wonderful mother. And I’ll raise them completely differently how she raised me EleanoreLOLYou do realize that the word "mean" is used in a tongue-in-cheek sense in that first post, right? I mean, I thought that was pretty dern obvious from the content of the post. As in, from a child's perspective at that time they would probably think your rules, etc. are "mean" but they're really not. Like, when you want to know where your teen is going and with whom ... they might think you're being "mean" to them but in reality you're concerned about their well-being because you love them. Glad to know some of you got it. Anyhoo, that was sent to me in an e-mail from my sister. I know my mom is a great mom, but even I'll admit that in my younger years of attempted rebellion I sometimes thought she was being "mean" for not letting me do whatever I wanted. Heaven bless her for not being one of those moms who wasn't interested in my life or who was too afraid to be stern with me for fear that it would ruin our relationship or my perception of her as a "good" mom. We honestly have a wonderful relationship now and I know I'll take her approach on many issues with my children ... even if they do think I'm being "mean" when they're 16 and I don't let them stay out as late as they want with people I've never met. ------------------"To learn is to live, to study is to grow, and growth is the measurement of life. The mind must be taught to think, the heart to feel, and the hands to labor. When these have been educated to their highest point, then is the time to offer them to the service of their fellowman, not before." - Manly P. HallCancerianMoonEleanore Thats my challenge...with 6 children to raise and remaining to be a mean mum!!! Thanks for the reminder and the inspiration!just some months ago i had my daughter tell me she hated me (aries girl) because of the things i didnt allow her to do and the things i also expected her to do...and now i think to that and smile..she loves me i know it(rarely tells me in words but always in cuddles and touches)...and that time will always be in my mind..while it was difficult it made us both pass a milestone We are closer now than ever.. sue gEleanoreNah I didnt understand what you meant girl......I am from Ireland remember......we have different attitudes here.....hahaha !!Mean means......mean here......mean as in cruel, unfair blah blah blah.....LibraSparkleHi Eleanore! Nice to see you around these parts!That was nice... and I am PROUDLY a mean, mean mama!Soogie! How are you? it's nice to see you around here too!Alma SunThanks for posting this, I loved it. For me though, I would replace 'mean mom' with 'responsible/respectable dad'. There needs to be more moms and dads like that. ------------------"All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt." — Charles M. Schulz ☺1-scorp"I loved you enough to let you see anger,disappointment, and tears in my eyes. Children mustlearn that their parents aren't perfect."I wrestle with this sometimes. This was perfect. Randall RandallI can only imagine how tough it must be to be a mommy or daddy.------------------"The stars which shone over Babylon and the stable in Bethlehem still shine as brightly over the Empire State Building and your front yard today. They perform their cycles with the same mathematical precision, and they will continue to affect each thing on earth, including man, as long as the earth exists." Linda GoodmanStarry, Starry NightYou don't know the half of it, the worst is teething, terrible twos, teen years and then they leave the coup. The best is being a grandmother when you spoil then hand them back. Hahaha1-scorpI dread the "leaving the coup". Randall ------------------"Never mentally imagine for another that which you would not want to experience for yourself, since the mental image you send out inevitably comes back to you." Rebecca ClarkRandallGrandparents are evil.------------------"Never mentally imagine for another that which you would not want to experience for yourself, since the mental image you send out inevitably comes back to you." Rebecca ClarkAlma Sun ------------------"The snake which cannot cast its skin has to die. As well the minds which are prevented from changing their opinions; they cease to be mind." --- Friedrich Nietzsche
------------------"To learn is to live, to study is to grow, and growth is the measurement of life. The mind must be taught to think, the heart to feel, and the hands to labor. When these have been educated to their highest point, then is the time to offer them to the service of their fellowman, not before." - Manly P. Hall
Mean has a very negative connotation.....like with Mr Scrooge.......
mean: miserly, ungenerous, petty dispicable, callous...
I would not want my son to go on to be "mean" to his children.......kind but firm would be more appropriate
well, I'm all for mean moms, in fact I pride myself on being a "meany mommy" lol, it was always a joke I had with my children, their friends and my neices and nephews. When asked "Whose the meanist Mommy?" replies varied, "You are", "Meany Nee-nee" (Nee-nee, short for Noreen) "Auntie MeanyNee-nee"!!! "Yes children you are correct, and don't you forget it", lol ....Bows.
Thanks Eleanore!
'Zala
I always did stand apart from the crowd.....hahahhaha !!!
And how can the lovewoman be "mean".....nah they dont really go together do they guys?
love and kindness
xxxxx
That is the perfect truth. My mom (a strong Taurus) was (is) very much what was described.
Some of my extended family thought she was "mean".
Yeah, I may have had a lot rules and guidelines to adhere to when I was a kid... but I love her for it. She taught me responsibility, respect, and discipline.
Now when I see her with my lil' Aqua and they butt heads ... I just laugh... I'm always grateful and awe of this woman.
I still wrestle with some of the necessary tough love that comes with being a mom.
This post helped. ___________________________________________Scorpio sun, venus, mars, mercury, and uranusLibra moon, pluto, and asc.
I met themostwonderfulof young men a while ago
and askedwhataccountedfor hiscalm andkinddisposition
he said
"Omy motherI supposeshe wasalways sokindandgentle andwhen shedid haveto say noI couldalways seelove in hereyes.....
O
nomeanmummythere !!
Shock horror right? Of course she’s not perfect…and as a result, I’m not perfect. But I love her for it
And if I have kids, I’ll tell them I had the most wonderful mother. And I’ll raise them completely differently how she raised me
You do realize that the word "mean" is used in a tongue-in-cheek sense in that first post, right? I mean, I thought that was pretty dern obvious from the content of the post. As in, from a child's perspective at that time they would probably think your rules, etc. are "mean" but they're really not. Like, when you want to know where your teen is going and with whom ... they might think you're being "mean" to them but in reality you're concerned about their well-being because you love them.
Glad to know some of you got it. Anyhoo, that was sent to me in an e-mail from my sister. I know my mom is a great mom, but even I'll admit that in my younger years of attempted rebellion I sometimes thought she was being "mean" for not letting me do whatever I wanted. Heaven bless her for not being one of those moms who wasn't interested in my life or who was too afraid to be stern with me for fear that it would ruin our relationship or my perception of her as a "good" mom. We honestly have a wonderful relationship now and I know I'll take her approach on many issues with my children ... even if they do think I'm being "mean" when they're 16 and I don't let them stay out as late as they want with people I've never met.
Thats my challenge...with 6 children to raise and remaining to be a mean mum!!! Thanks for the reminder and the inspiration!
just some months ago i had my daughter tell me she hated me (aries girl) because of the things i didnt allow her to do and the things i also expected her to do...and now i think to that and smile..she loves me i know it(rarely tells me in words but always in cuddles and touches)...and that time will always be in my mind..while it was difficult it made us both pass a milestone We are closer now than ever..
Nah I didnt understand what you meant girl......I am from Ireland remember......we have different attitudes here.....
hahaha !!
Mean means......mean here......mean as in cruel, unfair blah blah blah.....
Nice to see you around these parts!
That was nice... and I am PROUDLY a mean, mean mama!
Soogie! How are you? it's nice to see you around here too!
There needs to be more moms and dads like that.
------------------"All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt." — Charles M. Schulz ☺
I wrestle with this sometimes. This was perfect.
------------------"The stars which shone over Babylon and the stable in Bethlehem still shine as brightly over the Empire State Building and your front yard today. They perform their cycles with the same mathematical precision, and they will continue to affect each thing on earth, including man, as long as the earth exists." Linda Goodman
------------------"Never mentally imagine for another that which you would not want to experience for yourself, since the mental image you send out inevitably comes back to you." Rebecca Clark
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