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T O P I C R E V I E WhannaramaaI had a dream my roommate plotted to kill all our other roommates for some money. I don't know how she got the money or where she found it, but she planned to get them in a room together and blow them all up. I never liked the idea but I didn't know how to stop her until the day she set the actual trap (which included lining the room with money, by the way.)I got a piece of paper and wetted it with water (like, cupped it) and threw it all around the room in which she'd lined the bomb. I think she went in there early or was in there with me but didn't see me, and the bomb went off, scarring one side of her. I remember next being in the middle of my driveway watching her hobble up as fast as she could to me, with her arm and fist aimed to punch me. Her other hand was in a fist but she was pressing it against her groin area and keeping that arm straight. I found the position odd, so I mentioned it here. I called 911 and told them where I lived but I couldn't say my house number right at first. The next scene I saw we were in court on the stand, and I was sobbing, but she wasn't. I'd also gotten arrested and was hoping the judge would see how genuinely bad I felt and let me off with a lighter sentence.I should also add she got the idea for the bomb from our place of work after our security officer was monitoring a homeless man outside the store muttering to himself. They kept emphasizing he might be a serial bomber and I was afraid our officer would go outside and get killed. There was a romantic undertone between him and I in that scene too. They kept calling this serial bomber the "Jelly Bomb" or something, and vaseline was a key ingredient. Weird. Joy11What is your room mate's personality like?Do you remember what numbers you ended up saying when you called 911 and couldn't say the numbers right? Any numbers jumping out to your memory?------------------I can help you figure out your dreams, and guide you in how to use them to transform your life.www.sleepingrealities.comFollow me on Facebook!facebook.com/sleepingrealitiesFollow my blog!http://sleepingrealities.blogspot.comhannaramaa quote:Originally posted by Joy11:What is your room mate's personality like?Do you remember what numbers you ended up saying when you called 911 and couldn't say the numbers right? Any numbers jumping out to your memory?I don't actually have a roommate in real life, although in the dream we were in my actual driveway which has the main house on the left and the guest house on the right. I remember saying 10270, 10207, and I couldn't remember the last two digits before I finally got it right. The real life numbers are 10201.Also something that stuck out to me were her knuckles. As she's walking towards me keeping that arm pressed down, she's extending her other limb towards me and I can clearly see her knuckles but they look too big for her hand.Joy11 quote:Originally posted by hannaramaa:I had a dream my roommate plotted to kill all our other roommates for some money. I don't know how she got the money or where she found it, but she planned to get them in a room together and blow them all up. I never liked the idea but I didn't know how to stop her until the day she set the actual trap (which included lining the room with money, by the way.)I got a piece of paper and wetted it with water (like, cupped it) and threw it all around the room in which she'd lined the bomb. I think she went in there early or was in there with me but didn't see me, and the bomb went off, scarring one side of her. I remember next being in the middle of my driveway watching her hobble up as fast as she could to me, with her arm and fist aimed to punch me. Her other hand was in a fist but she was pressing it against her groin area and keeping that arm straight. I found the position odd, so I mentioned it here. I called 911 and told them where I lived but I couldn't say my house number right at first. The next scene I saw we were in court on the stand, and I was sobbing, but she wasn't. I'd also gotten arrested and was hoping the judge would see how genuinely bad I felt and let me off with a lighter sentence.I should also add she got the idea for the bomb from our place of work after our security officer was monitoring a homeless man outside the store muttering to himself. They kept emphasizing he might be a serial bomber and I was afraid our officer would go outside and get killed. There was a romantic undertone between him and I in that scene too. They kept calling this serial bomber the "Jelly Bomb" or something, and vaseline was a key ingredient. Weird. You're dealing with an issue of trying to contain a very explosive situation and/or set of feelings. The officer with the homeless man is the masculine (yang, if you will) side of the issue, and you with the room mate is the feminine (yin) side of the issue. Masculine and feminine symbols represent our outer and inner worlds, respectively. Both external and internal events in your life are mirroring each other. Do you feel like something has happened recently that "dropped a bomb" on you, so to speak?The homeless man and the money-greedy room mate are both in need of resources and trying to get them by force, and you're desperately trying to hold back this powerful force inside you. We must maintain balance in our lives and learn to love every part of ourselves, not just the pretty parts. Otherwise our imbalance will cause some difficult "explosions" in life!The number 7 got mixed up with 1, which is an easy thing to mix up, if you are looking at the numbers visually. Also, the posture of your room mate as she was chasing you was kind of like a 7, at least in my mind's eye-- one arm straight out, and the other arm down. :PNumbers in dreams are significant. Somehow, the number 7 is being brought to your attention as related to the feelings around this dream. Was there any issue you can think of that brings up similar feelings as today, perhaps when you were 7? 7 years ago (2005?) 7 months ago (November?)Huge knuckles-- Knuckles can be used for punching, but they are also important joints for allowing our fingers to move, increasing our ability to communicate and feed ourselves. I almost want to say something painful, like arthritis, would be causing these knuckles to be bigger than they should be. I think this room mate of yours represents a part of you that is in pain and needs some nourishment.How am I doing so far? ------------------I can help you figure out your dreams, and guide you in how to use them to transform your life.www.sleepingrealities.comFollow me on Facebook!facebook.com/sleepingrealitiesFollow my blog!http://sleepingrealities.blogspot.comhannaramaaI feel okay in my every day life. If I had to think of any situation that pressing it would be trying to figure out the actual security guard at work lol. I am usually not so patient with people, usually have an easier time getting a grip on their intentions but with him not so much. I think that is the bomb I'm waiting for so to speak although it wouldn't phase me much outwardly. You're right, she would be a bit like a 7! And you know her arm wasn't even straight out but it was cocked back like she was going to punch me. No difference though, I like that 7 idea, and it's very clever how the homeless man and the rooomate both correspond. I missed that as well. I remember looking down (as if I was observing and not actually part of the dream) at the homeless man sitting in a car in the parking lot with the driver's side door open. He was in the driver's seat and that's when it switched to the scene with the roommate. She had big curly hair, was African American and skinny. Also, I quit my job in November for 10 days to go work at another place I though I would be a better fit in, but I ended up going back. I also very briefly dated a man in November too. Other than that November isn't significant for me. My birthday is on the 7th though.Joy11The security guard at work--do you feel an actual romantic attraction to him, like in the dream, or are you trying to figure him out for another reason? Based on what you've managed to ascertain about him so far, how would you describe his personality, his energy?Imagine back into the dream and bring up the room mate and the homeless man. Can you tell me what you feel about their personalities/energies too, please?You said that you have a guest house on the right and the main house on the left. Which part of the house did the room mate blow up, the left or the right? Which side of her got scarred by the explosion, do you remember?When you moved to a different job briefly 7 months ago, what about the job made you feel that you didn't fit there, so you had to go back to the original one? What about the relationship back then didn't work out?Sorry, lots of questions. I've got some hunches, but I want to make sure I'm on the right track. ------------------I can help you figure out your dreams, and guide you in how to use them to transform your life.www.sleepingrealities.comFollow me on Facebook!facebook.com/sleepingrealitiesFollow my blog!http://sleepingrealities.blogspot.comhannaramaaSecurity guard - I do, but it's small. It used to be HUGE but the more I get to know him the more I realize how much he still needs to grow up if he wants to date me. He has very feminine, permeable energy and is very soft-hearted. I think he's depressed at the moment. His energy reminds me of a high schooler's, or that's what I think of when I see and talk to him. ETA: It occurred to me I often refer to him in my head as being so lost in life, and that would kind of make sense with the homeless guy - right?The homeless man - Well, I was inside the store looking out at him so we never interacted. I didn't feel anything from him. He didn't scare me but since everyone else was worried about him, I noticed and observed what he was doing. All I remember is watching him walk to a car from a distance, then I turned to look at the guard.The roommate - She was pushy when telling me about the plan to bomb the house. Stubborn, alpha-ish. After the explosion she was silent and the right side of her is what I remember being scarred, but to be honest I think her face was marred overall. She blew up the right side, I think. The job - I was hired as a seasonal worker and hoped I would get hired on full time but my personality didn't seem to fit very well with the other girls. They weren't that entertaining, plus I most had a problem with my boss because she would give me 3-hour shifts only to cut me loose and let me go home within 1 hour anyway. It was an uncomfortable atmosphere because I think they all knew I would be leaving in a couple months anyway (since I was seasonal) but were also familiar with me as a customer and knew how bad I wanted to work there.The guy - Well I wasn't attracted to him at ALL for starters. We had nothing in common intellectually, and he man handled me. He was a gross person in general but we got set up by friends.Joy11The dream starts with you looking down at the situation, not really a part of it. This shows that your consciousness is not connected to the feelings involved in this part of the dream. They are deeply unconscious; they have probably been pushed away because you don't really want to feel them... maybe they are too painful, or indicting, or whatever.If we don't have a conscious relationship with any part of ourself, it can easily overpower us whenever it wants to. On the other hand, usually all it needs is conscious acknowledgement and an intentional "feeling fully" of the emotions, then it doesn't cause us harm. This seems counterintuitive, but it's how the psyche seems to work. I feel that the issue your dream is raising is related to feelings of neediness, insecurity, and homelessness. This feeling expresses in two ways-- retreating, or pushing. It's like you can't find a balance between backing away / driving away when you feel insecure, or becoming pushy and alpha. I think you usually choose to back away, but this makes you angry inside.In the day or two before you had the dream, something must have triggered some feelings of neediness and homelessness deep inside you. You have learned throughout your life to push these needy/homeless feelings so far from you, that you can't even connect with them in dreams. But your dream is giving you the message that this issue is there and wants your attention.The serial bomber part indicates that this is a long-standing emotional issue for you that has caused you problems in the past, even though you aren't fully aware that this is the "root" of the problem. This homeless feeling in you is what's really "driving" your life in many ways.You do feel an emotional connection to your sense of "security," as a way to try to NOT feel your insecurity. I would be willing to guess that if I met you in waking life and asked if you felt insecure, you would say "no, not really, not often." You tend to connect better with your secure side. But since your feelings about the waking-life security guard are that he's rather immature, high-school-ish, and lost in life, it shows that YOUR sense of security you are clinging to has some maturing to do, as well. Perhaps you picked up your ideas about security in life while you were actually in high school. Ironically, it will only be by facing and connecting with your deep insecurity, that you will be able to have a more mature, lovely, true security.The room mate in the dream is another iteration of the homeless man, as I referred to earlier, but this is from a different angle. They both needed money, which refers to your life's energy and resources, attention, talents, etc. (This could be reflecting on your waking life relationship with real money but it's more likely reflecting your relationship with your internal energies and resources. Money is a resource, a flow that we need in life.) The homeless man was lost in life, but the room mate wanted to be ALPHA! She was pushy. This stubborn alpha part of you is feeling desperate for more resources, more of your energy and attention, and she's willing to make an explosion (an internal energy pushing its way OUT) to get it! Even the large fists-- that could be indicating a grabbing kind of energy, like "fists full of money," kind of idea?Your ego is really trying to keep this part of you under control, put out the fires, so to speak. It has managed to silence this inner voice for now, but I'm sorry to say, you can't get rid of it; you have to face it and accept it. When you do, though, you'll find it transforms into something very positive for your life. It's a paradox.I'm so glad you said the right side of the body and the right side of the house were burned; that's the side I would have guessed. The right side of our brain is our yin, our feminine, creative, wholistic-thinking side. By suppressing this deep inner need in yourself and turning its explosive energies back onto itself, you are damaging your yin, your feminine side. I notice you didn't say she "burned" her face, but she "scarred" her face. This points to the fact that this is a long-standing issues, and you have some scars.The scene with the judge sheds some light onto the matter. Perhaps the reason you feel unable to connect with these deep feelings is that you fear a sense of judgement about these qualities. You've learned it's "against the law" so to speak, to be needy, to be alpha, to be insecure, to be pushy, and so on. So you "judge" them in yourself. You then disconnect further with these feelings, hoping to evade the judgement!Have a think about how the number 7 might fit into all of this. What you describe 7 months ago might fit-- you weren't pushing your way into the job, and it didn't really open up for you-- Perhaps you can think of other issues in life at different time periods where these feelings in life might have developed, where you have been scarred. Again, this is all happening at the unconscious level, so it might come as a surprise to you that these issues are there. But the more you live with it and ponder it, the more it will open up and reveal itself to your consciousness. I hope this resonates with you, though.I have a few ideas, if you'd like to face these inner feelings, accept them lovingly into yourself, and not have a need for any more "explosions" in your life:1) Do a visualization. Imagine you're back on the judge's stand with the stubborn room mate. Feel as much of the emotion and sensation as you can... the anxiety, the guilt, the sorrow, the anger... And then the judge says to both of you, "The verdict is.... Friends!" You feel such relief! Everything is OK! Turn and look at your room mate and give her a big hug. Tell her you'll always be there for her, and as you do so, you watch her face magically heal and transform into a radiant, loving angel. She tells you she'll always support you. Do this visualization several times a day for 2 weeks; then repeat as necessary.2)You could draw or write a "contract" between you and your room mate. Include terms like "We are allowed to feel our feelings as needed; we are always safe at home; we allow ourselves to put ourselves first, since we can't help others if all our resources are drained; we don't judge each other or ourselves," and whatever else comes to mind. The important part is to feel a sense of connection with this "room mate" part of yourself, and give it a guarantee that it has a voice too. Bring as much emotion into it as you can. Read it several times a day for 2 weeks.Some advice: As you work through these dream-activities, you may feel a deepening of your emotions, and there might be some depression or sadness or anger or other feelings that come up that you're not comfortable with. These are the feelings you haven't allowed yourself to feel. Lovingly let them come, and pass whenever they are ready. It's always shorter than we think. Keep doing the visualization and/or reading of your contract (or whatever activity YOU might come up with based on the dream), and within a month you'll probably feel a difference.------------------I can help you figure out your dreams, and guide you in how to use them to transform your life.www.sleepingrealities.comFollow me on Facebook!facebook.com/sleepingrealitiesFollow my blog!http://sleepingrealities.blogspot.comhannaramaaSo to sum it up, are you saying my dream was about accepting flaws? (Being insecure, needy, etc.) I'm amazed at those connections you made! I'm going to start having to record more of my dreams and think about the patterns in them. Also something I realized (and you may have said this, just in a different way) is the homeless guy needed money and my room mate had money and was blowing it up. She was alpha, the homeless guy wasn't. Yeah...that's definitely yin/yang but perhaps even there's a theme of disrespect? Like I'm not respecting myself because I try super hard to not be needy?Also you're right. I often times don't feel insecure. I didn't think it was a bad thing but I guess when there isn't balance then it becomes one.Another thing to add is I frequently dream about toilets being full to the brim. Some of my dreams they've been overflowing but many of them they are just full. It's interesting because I looked it up and found it represented emotions not being expressed. i'm an Aries, lol. I can't help but be alpha but a lot of the times with men I try to tone it down because I'll either scare them away or attract more sensitive and frail type of men. I'm trying to find a balance so that I might attract another balanced person but it's difficult. Something I didn't even connect until I analyzed my dream again was the exploding part! I didn't even realize the homeless guy is blowing up cars and the room mate is blowing up money. It's so obvious though. She needed a get away car (I mean in my dream that was never an issue but if you just blew up money, wouldn't you want some place to escape?) and the homeless guy needs money but they're both destroying their resources.RandallYou're pretty good at this, Joy.------------------"Never mentally imagine for another that which you would not want to experience for yourself, since the mental image you send out inevitably comes back to you." Rebecca Clarkhannaramaa quote:Originally posted by Randall:You're pretty good at this, Joy.I agree. I was also going to mention I glanced at something about you needing testimonials, I'd be happy to offer one if you want.Joy11Thanks Hanarama. I haven't been able to get on this forum for awhile, so sorry for the late reply. I'm happy to help, and I love dreams! Feel free to email me at sleepingrealities@gmail.com You can type up the testimonial, and put either your name, or initials, and where you're from.I appreciate it very much!! ------------------I can help you figure out your dreams, and guide you in how to use them to transform your life.www.sleepingrealities.comFollow me on Facebook!facebook.com/sleepingrealitiesFollow my blog!http://sleepingrealities.blogspot.com
I got a piece of paper and wetted it with water (like, cupped it) and threw it all around the room in which she'd lined the bomb. I think she went in there early or was in there with me but didn't see me, and the bomb went off, scarring one side of her.
I remember next being in the middle of my driveway watching her hobble up as fast as she could to me, with her arm and fist aimed to punch me. Her other hand was in a fist but she was pressing it against her groin area and keeping that arm straight. I found the position odd, so I mentioned it here.
I called 911 and told them where I lived but I couldn't say my house number right at first. The next scene I saw we were in court on the stand, and I was sobbing, but she wasn't. I'd also gotten arrested and was hoping the judge would see how genuinely bad I felt and let me off with a lighter sentence.
I should also add she got the idea for the bomb from our place of work after our security officer was monitoring a homeless man outside the store muttering to himself. They kept emphasizing he might be a serial bomber and I was afraid our officer would go outside and get killed. There was a romantic undertone between him and I in that scene too. They kept calling this serial bomber the "Jelly Bomb" or something, and vaseline was a key ingredient.
Weird.
Do you remember what numbers you ended up saying when you called 911 and couldn't say the numbers right? Any numbers jumping out to your memory?
------------------I can help you figure out your dreams, and guide you in how to use them to transform your life.www.sleepingrealities.comFollow me on Facebook!facebook.com/sleepingrealitiesFollow my blog!http://sleepingrealities.blogspot.com
quote:Originally posted by Joy11:What is your room mate's personality like?Do you remember what numbers you ended up saying when you called 911 and couldn't say the numbers right? Any numbers jumping out to your memory?
I don't actually have a roommate in real life, although in the dream we were in my actual driveway which has the main house on the left and the guest house on the right.
I remember saying 10270, 10207, and I couldn't remember the last two digits before I finally got it right. The real life numbers are 10201.
Also something that stuck out to me were her knuckles. As she's walking towards me keeping that arm pressed down, she's extending her other limb towards me and I can clearly see her knuckles but they look too big for her hand.
quote:Originally posted by hannaramaa:I had a dream my roommate plotted to kill all our other roommates for some money. I don't know how she got the money or where she found it, but she planned to get them in a room together and blow them all up. I never liked the idea but I didn't know how to stop her until the day she set the actual trap (which included lining the room with money, by the way.)I got a piece of paper and wetted it with water (like, cupped it) and threw it all around the room in which she'd lined the bomb. I think she went in there early or was in there with me but didn't see me, and the bomb went off, scarring one side of her. I remember next being in the middle of my driveway watching her hobble up as fast as she could to me, with her arm and fist aimed to punch me. Her other hand was in a fist but she was pressing it against her groin area and keeping that arm straight. I found the position odd, so I mentioned it here. I called 911 and told them where I lived but I couldn't say my house number right at first. The next scene I saw we were in court on the stand, and I was sobbing, but she wasn't. I'd also gotten arrested and was hoping the judge would see how genuinely bad I felt and let me off with a lighter sentence.I should also add she got the idea for the bomb from our place of work after our security officer was monitoring a homeless man outside the store muttering to himself. They kept emphasizing he might be a serial bomber and I was afraid our officer would go outside and get killed. There was a romantic undertone between him and I in that scene too. They kept calling this serial bomber the "Jelly Bomb" or something, and vaseline was a key ingredient. Weird.
You're dealing with an issue of trying to contain a very explosive situation and/or set of feelings. The officer with the homeless man is the masculine (yang, if you will) side of the issue, and you with the room mate is the feminine (yin) side of the issue. Masculine and feminine symbols represent our outer and inner worlds, respectively. Both external and internal events in your life are mirroring each other. Do you feel like something has happened recently that "dropped a bomb" on you, so to speak?
The homeless man and the money-greedy room mate are both in need of resources and trying to get them by force, and you're desperately trying to hold back this powerful force inside you. We must maintain balance in our lives and learn to love every part of ourselves, not just the pretty parts. Otherwise our imbalance will cause some difficult "explosions" in life!
The number 7 got mixed up with 1, which is an easy thing to mix up, if you are looking at the numbers visually. Also, the posture of your room mate as she was chasing you was kind of like a 7, at least in my mind's eye-- one arm straight out, and the other arm down. :PNumbers in dreams are significant. Somehow, the number 7 is being brought to your attention as related to the feelings around this dream. Was there any issue you can think of that brings up similar feelings as today, perhaps when you were 7? 7 years ago (2005?) 7 months ago (November?)
Huge knuckles-- Knuckles can be used for punching, but they are also important joints for allowing our fingers to move, increasing our ability to communicate and feed ourselves. I almost want to say something painful, like arthritis, would be causing these knuckles to be bigger than they should be. I think this room mate of yours represents a part of you that is in pain and needs some nourishment.How am I doing so far?
You're right, she would be a bit like a 7! And you know her arm wasn't even straight out but it was cocked back like she was going to punch me. No difference though, I like that 7 idea, and it's very clever how the homeless man and the rooomate both correspond. I missed that as well. I remember looking down (as if I was observing and not actually part of the dream) at the homeless man sitting in a car in the parking lot with the driver's side door open. He was in the driver's seat and that's when it switched to the scene with the roommate. She had big curly hair, was African American and skinny.
Also, I quit my job in November for 10 days to go work at another place I though I would be a better fit in, but I ended up going back. I also very briefly dated a man in November too. Other than that November isn't significant for me. My birthday is on the 7th though.
Security guard - I do, but it's small. It used to be HUGE but the more I get to know him the more I realize how much he still needs to grow up if he wants to date me. He has very feminine, permeable energy and is very soft-hearted. I think he's depressed at the moment. His energy reminds me of a high schooler's, or that's what I think of when I see and talk to him. ETA: It occurred to me I often refer to him in my head as being so lost in life, and that would kind of make sense with the homeless guy - right?
The homeless man - Well, I was inside the store looking out at him so we never interacted. I didn't feel anything from him. He didn't scare me but since everyone else was worried about him, I noticed and observed what he was doing. All I remember is watching him walk to a car from a distance, then I turned to look at the guard.
The roommate - She was pushy when telling me about the plan to bomb the house. Stubborn, alpha-ish. After the explosion she was silent and the right side of her is what I remember being scarred, but to be honest I think her face was marred overall. She blew up the right side, I think.
The job - I was hired as a seasonal worker and hoped I would get hired on full time but my personality didn't seem to fit very well with the other girls. They weren't that entertaining, plus I most had a problem with my boss because she would give me 3-hour shifts only to cut me loose and let me go home within 1 hour anyway. It was an uncomfortable atmosphere because I think they all knew I would be leaving in a couple months anyway (since I was seasonal) but were also familiar with me as a customer and knew how bad I wanted to work there.
The guy - Well I wasn't attracted to him at ALL for starters. We had nothing in common intellectually, and he man handled me. He was a gross person in general but we got set up by friends.
The room mate in the dream is another iteration of the homeless man, as I referred to earlier, but this is from a different angle. They both needed money, which refers to your life's energy and resources, attention, talents, etc. (This could be reflecting on your waking life relationship with real money but it's more likely reflecting your relationship with your internal energies and resources. Money is a resource, a flow that we need in life.) The homeless man was lost in life, but the room mate wanted to be ALPHA! She was pushy. This stubborn alpha part of you is feeling desperate for more resources, more of your energy and attention, and she's willing to make an explosion (an internal energy pushing its way OUT) to get it! Even the large fists-- that could be indicating a grabbing kind of energy, like "fists full of money," kind of idea?Your ego is really trying to keep this part of you under control, put out the fires, so to speak. It has managed to silence this inner voice for now, but I'm sorry to say, you can't get rid of it; you have to face it and accept it. When you do, though, you'll find it transforms into something very positive for your life. It's a paradox.
I'm so glad you said the right side of the body and the right side of the house were burned; that's the side I would have guessed. The right side of our brain is our yin, our feminine, creative, wholistic-thinking side. By suppressing this deep inner need in yourself and turning its explosive energies back onto itself, you are damaging your yin, your feminine side. I notice you didn't say she "burned" her face, but she "scarred" her face. This points to the fact that this is a long-standing issues, and you have some scars.
The scene with the judge sheds some light onto the matter. Perhaps the reason you feel unable to connect with these deep feelings is that you fear a sense of judgement about these qualities. You've learned it's "against the law" so to speak, to be needy, to be alpha, to be insecure, to be pushy, and so on. So you "judge" them in yourself. You then disconnect further with these feelings, hoping to evade the judgement!
Have a think about how the number 7 might fit into all of this. What you describe 7 months ago might fit-- you weren't pushing your way into the job, and it didn't really open up for you-- Perhaps you can think of other issues in life at different time periods where these feelings in life might have developed, where you have been scarred. Again, this is all happening at the unconscious level, so it might come as a surprise to you that these issues are there. But the more you live with it and ponder it, the more it will open up and reveal itself to your consciousness. I hope this resonates with you, though.
I have a few ideas, if you'd like to face these inner feelings, accept them lovingly into yourself, and not have a need for any more "explosions" in your life:1) Do a visualization. Imagine you're back on the judge's stand with the stubborn room mate. Feel as much of the emotion and sensation as you can... the anxiety, the guilt, the sorrow, the anger... And then the judge says to both of you, "The verdict is.... Friends!" You feel such relief! Everything is OK! Turn and look at your room mate and give her a big hug. Tell her you'll always be there for her, and as you do so, you watch her face magically heal and transform into a radiant, loving angel. She tells you she'll always support you. Do this visualization several times a day for 2 weeks; then repeat as necessary.2)You could draw or write a "contract" between you and your room mate. Include terms like "We are allowed to feel our feelings as needed; we are always safe at home; we allow ourselves to put ourselves first, since we can't help others if all our resources are drained; we don't judge each other or ourselves," and whatever else comes to mind. The important part is to feel a sense of connection with this "room mate" part of yourself, and give it a guarantee that it has a voice too. Bring as much emotion into it as you can. Read it several times a day for 2 weeks.
Some advice: As you work through these dream-activities, you may feel a deepening of your emotions, and there might be some depression or sadness or anger or other feelings that come up that you're not comfortable with. These are the feelings you haven't allowed yourself to feel. Lovingly let them come, and pass whenever they are ready. It's always shorter than we think. Keep doing the visualization and/or reading of your contract (or whatever activity YOU might come up with based on the dream), and within a month you'll probably feel a difference.
I'm amazed at those connections you made! I'm going to start having to record more of my dreams and think about the patterns in them.
Also something I realized (and you may have said this, just in a different way) is the homeless guy needed money and my room mate had money and was blowing it up. She was alpha, the homeless guy wasn't. Yeah...that's definitely yin/yang but perhaps even there's a theme of disrespect? Like I'm not respecting myself because I try super hard to not be needy?
Also you're right. I often times don't feel insecure. I didn't think it was a bad thing but I guess when there isn't balance then it becomes one.
Another thing to add is I frequently dream about toilets being full to the brim. Some of my dreams they've been overflowing but many of them they are just full. It's interesting because I looked it up and found it represented emotions not being expressed. i'm an Aries, lol. I can't help but be alpha but a lot of the times with men I try to tone it down because I'll either scare them away or attract more sensitive and frail type of men. I'm trying to find a balance so that I might attract another balanced person but it's difficult.
Something I didn't even connect until I analyzed my dream again was the exploding part! I didn't even realize the homeless guy is blowing up cars and the room mate is blowing up money. It's so obvious though. She needed a get away car (I mean in my dream that was never an issue but if you just blew up money, wouldn't you want some place to escape?) and the homeless guy needs money but they're both destroying their resources.
------------------"Never mentally imagine for another that which you would not want to experience for yourself, since the mental image you send out inevitably comes back to you." Rebecca Clark
quote:Originally posted by Randall:You're pretty good at this, Joy.
I agree. I was also going to mention I glanced at something about you needing testimonials, I'd be happy to offer one if you want.
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