Hello darling Knowflakes ,I've decided that I absolutely need a career change before I rip my freaking eyeballs out. I'm having trouble deciding what I want to do because I'm not in the position to go back to college for a new bachelor's degree nor do I have any particular "expertise" that I want to spend 4 years and thousands of dollars pursuing.
A little background information: I went to college and studied Journalism. I couldn't finish because of my mother. My mother cancelled my student loans by saying that she never consented to co-sign. My mother is just… insane and thought it would be better for me to not have student loans and tried to force my dad to pay for my tuition as a power move. She and my father have been trying to divorce for five years now (I know… a very long time. Give it to an Aries man and a Cancer woman to "amicably" divorce…), and she's just very selfish and vindictive. She's also just… insane.
Anywho, my dad couldn't pay for my tuition, so instead I taught English abroad in Korea for a semester then moved to NY when I came back to the US. I moved to NY because where else do you move when you have nothing to lose and everything to gain? It was such an amazing, magical time in my life… I really was Super Woman back then. I saved $2,200 while in Korea, found an apartment 3 days after moving to NY while living in a hostel for $15 a day, and found a job as a personal assistant to a fairly well off public relations and marketing guru after a WEEK of searching. I made 500 a week - paid in cash - and met the love of my life (Mr. Cancer) at a summer concert in the park with mutual friends. I quit my job as a personal assistant after a month when my boss decided to go on several month hiatus to do whatever it is rich people do when they don't feel like working… I interviewed at another job at a PR firm after 2 days after I quit. I got the assistant job a week later.
At the PR firm, I had lied about graduating and put down on my resume that I had graduated a year early. I initially had lied in my cover letters to see if having a college degree even made a difference in the application process - and quickly discovered that it really didn't… Jobs were sparse no matter what. Even with a degree, your chances of finding a job was increased only by maybe… 15%? All the while, I didn't know a single soul in the city and couldn't even ask for a favor from everyone. All I did was spend every second on Craigslist sending out my resume and praying that I could just find something to keep me afloat.
Fast forward about 4 months, the Mr. Cancer is going back to LA after his summer hiatus in NY, and I'm in love with him. Incidentally, my roommates are a nightmare and my job was moving offices… to New Jersey. Not only did I have to find a new apartment, I needed to find an apartment in MANHATTAN and commute to NJ to keep my job. There's no way on God's earth that I would pay to live in the city only to have to COMMUTE to NJ. So I decided to just move to LA and see what would come my way without knowing a single soul or any clue what trouble I was going to get into.
Two years later, here I am. I've worked several personal assistant/publicist jobs to music industry moguls and at a fashion brand that I can only describe as the worst hell I've ever experienced so far in my life. I now work at a web development agency/ "startup" that I truly believe is a PONZI SCHEME… as the go-to office pet/girl friday and "publicist" assistant. While I do have an interest in social media marketing and PR, I just don't have a strong enough interest to make a career out of it. Most careers in social media are ******** anyway if you're not a developer/designer or community manager. We have a "sales" team that does **** , and snobby spoiled rich kids who have no clue what the fck they're during as executives. I haven't even told you guys the bad side of things!
To say the least, this is far more than hating my job. I need a new shift in consciousness and a new path to pave for myself. I just can't stare at my computer anymore, and the superficiality of where I live and where I work is starting to take a serious toll on my soul… and my mental stability lol. I need a new job!!!
There are several things that I really want to do want that feels the best for me, like:
1) Move out of the "city" as I am no longer happy with life in Los Angeles. I've lived in a lot of places, including New York City, and LA is the worst when it comes to people. I have never met more people living off of their parents' money - both rich and poor! I've met so many scammers, scumbags, and assholes in my time here. I'm just so sick of it.
Unfortunately, the Mr. Cancer works in film and does not want to move, thus I must stay to be with him. I want to move to one of the small towns outside of LA (Ojai, California is my top choice at the moment) so I can drive into LA to come see him or he can drive out to stay with me during the weekend. We've discussed it, and he's totally willing to make the commute to see me; I feel the same way about him. He really is worth all the trouble .
2) Start my own business. I absolutely CANNOT stand working in an office anymore. All of my adult life has been spent in offices taking orders from people who could never do their work as well as I did for them (not an exaggeration, I'm a hard worker!). I hate the time constraints, the pressure to perform for the benefit of something that doesn't truly benefit humanity in any shape or form, and I just want to work on my own terms! I want the freedom to dictate my own time, work, and still have fun!
My main serious ambition right now is going to culinary school and making my own catering business. I also would love to buy land and create a small sustainable farm where I can teach cooking classes and sustainable living to kids! I've always been a curious cook and I think I'm pretty good.
Just the other day I made lemon cheesecake stuffed strawberries dipped in chocolate. Try it! Lemon cheesecake is super easy to make at home, too.
I plan on making my final decision on October 28th because a lot of major changes in my life have been made on those days... and it's also the feast day of St. Jude... the patron saint of desperate cases lol.
Here is my progression chart with my natals. Please help me out as I could use all the advice that I get! Thank you for looking and reading so much!