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T O P I C R E V I E WmereiposaThis is the relationship I refer to a lot, and have based all subsequent relationships on since. He came into my life, but it was so unstable and he didn't want anything other than physical and lightheartedness. It was on off until I broke it off. This happened twice. He came back again recently, and we approached it as just friends. But staying just friends is not an option. It doesn't work with us. But he is very different this time. As am I. I am not under his spell like I was, but I am so afraid of this relationship blowing up again. I dream about him, and they are usually premonition or symbolic dreams. He was the one with the control and the power previously, but I feel a subtle shift. I think it's me now. I am comfortable with our synastry, but our composite is what I am unsure of.In the composite I see all the outer planets fighting everything else. There is definitely love, and our composite hits many significant points in our charts, midpoints too. But so many struggles.Could you take a look please and help me see?Me: Him: Composite: Lucia23I wish I could read composites! But something jumped out at me in the synastry and I just read your other thread (re transits to your NN)....his Jupiter on your NN. It's like he represents everything that expands and brings joy, luck and abundance to your lifepath. That's just one element in a very complex synastry...I hope some real astrologers will comment and help. But your NN is getting hit up the wazoo, and whatever else happens with this relationship, you should take note of the example he sets in Virgo and 10th house areas--the vibe he sends out, how he handles his career, calling, and daily routines--because his way of being has something to teach you about what would fulfill you in terms of your own life, whatever happens in the relationship. One of the reasons the connection may have felt precarious to you or like you were the one who needed more from it might have been that NN contact--he has or embodies or does something you want for yourself--there's some way you want to be like him.mereiposaThanks Lucia,I have never looked at it like that. I do need things he has. He is going where I came from, and I'm going where he was (NN/SN opposites). My ex-husband was born two weeks after this man, so the natal charts are somewhat similar and the composite similar too. I have to remind myself that there are significant differences, and for the composite the houses are different. But I know how my marriage ended and I just don't want this to go that route.I've never had a composite full of trines and ease, and In my heart I believe I need these tensions to propel me to where I need to be. Even my best friends have a tension filled composite with me. But trusting that this will be ok is hard!girlwiththerainysoul quote:Originally posted by mereiposa:[B] I am so afraid of this relationship blowing up again. I dream about him, and they are usually premonition or symbolic dreams. I can tell that the main reason for your attractions can be:- your ascendants aren't square but in signs which are naturally square: this usually happens with the fixed signs too, and I have seen attractions happening a lot and very often between Leo AS and Scorpio AS, as those two signs are all about sex and power underneath. - your marses again square or in signs naturally square (yours in virgo, his in sag)- his moon conjunct your neptune: this is why you can tend to idealize each other and have profound dreams of one another. in my own personal experiences, hard neptune aspects (conjunctions, opposition and square) to the sun, moon and/or venus, can often lead to the neptune person "fading away" as in physically disappearing. as neptune is all about ideal love and once the pressures of "real" life happen, neptune tends to feel that this isn't ideal and so he/she leaves. and the reason you have fear about the relationship ending, is because of chiron in the 8th composite house. composite charts can never be controlled by the two people in the relationship (in contrast to natal charts, where a person can choose to modify his/her energies to some extent in life), as they show circumstances or themes which always be present in the relationship. when two people choose to enter a relationship, it would be very beneficial to look at the composite and tell them what exist there, if they choose to enter this together, as it will never change. with chiron in the 8th, there can be constant fears about being cheated on or one person abandoning the other. chiron in your composite is also opposite uranus which rules divorce. so it is as if both of you feel that anything can happen in this relationship, and there can be very little feeling of security or trust here.------------------pisces moontaurus midheavenleo ascendanttaurus suncancer mars and venusmereiposaWell our ASC are actually trine. I'm Scorp 28, and he's Cancer 29. And would the Moon Neptune DW not help the neptune issues? His Neptune trines my Sun and sextiles my Moon. We also have Moon Pluto DW. I think these are things that keep us returning to each other. I think our friendship is coming from Sun sextile Venus DW (they are wide, but from my understanding bcs it's a DW they count) and his Venus trine my Moon. His Jupiter to my Sun and Moon, my Jupiter to his Venus. Uranus opp Chiron in composite rules divorce? I think I remember that from somewhere, but my recent searches haven't shown that again yet. That would hold true with my marriage. And many broken or severed friendships. Unfortunately, I have that aspect with everyone. Across a wide range of ages. I don't need to get married again, but I do want a companion in my life. And I do want that companion to be long term, as in forever! Chiron in the 8th interpretation is one I had not heard. I suppose as Chiron is about healing, this fear can be addressed and healed. I don't have a fear of being cheated on, but I did in my marriage. A huge one in fact. Our chiron was in the 6th though. With this man, it may come in to play if our relationship were to sustain itself for a long period of time. So the question I posed on the other thread, would that troubling Uranus square and opposition in the composite be easier to deal with if both people had challenging Uranus in their natal charts? I suppose theoretically, yes. But who knows what challenges it will actually bring. One other thing, in the other forum an old post of IQs on Sabian symbols came up. Our composite hits a lot of these important Sabian degrees. Our Sun and Venus for example. So the identity of and our love within the relationship may bring with it profound growth and contribution to our individual paths. Knowing my personal journey, I am thinking this is an important relationship for my spiritual growth. And in that mindset, I need to focus on the present moment. Let go of the past, and not worry about the future. I cannot change things, and if I try to avoid hurt I will miss the gifts this exchange could bring. girlwiththerainysoul quote:Originally posted by mereiposa:[B]Well our ASC are actually trine. I'm Scorp 28, and he's Cancer 29. oops I am sorry for this mistake. this past couple of days I came across a few relationships between Leo ASs and Scorpio ASc and my careless, hasty aries mercury presumed that yours is another one and saw his AS at the beginning of leo.------------------pisces moontaurus midheavenleo ascendanttaurus suncancer mars and venusEmGemId love to hear Todd's take on your composite! He's an expert on midpoints.Mereiposa, I can relate to a few things you have mentioned and this quite possibly is because of your chart being so similar to my progressed, as we've discovered before When did your marriage end just out of interest? girlwiththerainysoul quote:Originally posted by mereiposa:[B]Uranus opp Chiron in composite rules divorce? uranus alone rules divorce, separation or long-distance themed relationships. I have found uranus very present in the composites of couples where one or both have a prominent scorpio.Naturally, people with sun, AS, or personal planets in Scorpio will almost never trust another person, not even their closest one. So they prefer to keep a certain amount of distance for their own reasons. Others usually find these people quite intense too, especially if they have the sun or the moon in a mutable or incompatible sign. This can result in a relationship where distance is mutually preferred.house 8th is whatever is felt deep beneath the surface of the relationship and yet one that the two prefer to keep a secret to themselves and never talk about. In your composite chiron is there, and there is a chance that you guys will almost never trust one another enough to open up about your traumas to one another, as you may fear that the other may abandon you for this. On the contrary, if you decide together to be honest about everything, and decide on mutual trust, a great deal of closeness and healing is possible. but chiron has this characteristic which is in fact never being satisfied and "full". there can be endless loops of trying to trust, and trust being broken.when composite uranus is threatening the 8th house, it worsens all that exists there. lots of upheaves are expected anyway.------------------pisces moontaurus midheavenleo ascendanttaurus suncancer mars and venusgirlwiththerainysoul quote:Originally posted by mereiposa:So the identity of and our love within the relationship may bring with it profound growth and contribution to our individual paths. Knowing my personal journey, I am thinking this is an important relationship for my spiritual growth. And in that mindset, I need to focus on the present moment. Let go of the past, and not worry about the future. I cannot change things, and if I try to avoid hurt I will miss the gifts this exchange could bring. I very much agree and encourage you to show this man the green light if you sensed his attraction too. But also don't hesitate to leave if you weren't treated the way you desire. remember that relationships are about give and take and "both" people must enjoy, and feel loved and comfortable in the relationship. What you need the most, is what will bring you the most growth and joy. But not necessarily everybody who comes into your path will bring you that.My personal belief is that whenever we feel a possible connection, there sure is a part of ourselves that we are looking at through the mirror of the other. So we start to give and watch the other's reaction. if they give back, this relationship has potential for greatness. if the other is still unmature (no matter what their age) and a small person, the relationship is only a waste of time and money, no matter how tightly the venus and mars are conjunct or the man's sun is square the woman's moon.------------------pisces moontaurus midheavenleo ascendanttaurus suncancer mars and venusgirlwiththerainysoulwith his sun in your 8th house, I can understand how magnetic his presence must be for you. something keeps telling you to get involved with him. I'd say that do go for it. and after the relationship is officially formed, you can start working together on things like chiron in the 8th opposite uranus.and just because I am a sucker for matchmaking, I am also interested to know if such man will ever come across path and how you guys will end up!his AS in virgo or capsun in Libramoon in late scorpio------------------pisces moontaurus midheavenleo ascendanttaurus suncancer mars and venusgirlwiththerainysoulcan I ask, is this relationship in anyway considered an "unorthodox" relationship or one that some people may frown upon? because in the composite I see chiron widely square moon and closely square sun. sun square chiron usually happens in homosexual couples charts, or in the relationships where the two often feel that there is something fundamentally wrong and painful about their relationship.------------------pisces moontaurus midheavenleo ascendanttaurus suncancer mars and venusmereiposa quote:Originally posted by EmGem:Id love to hear Todd's take on your composite! He's an expert on midpoints.Mereiposa, I can relate to a few things you have mentioned and this quite possibly is because of your chart being so similar to my progressed, as we've discovered before When did your marriage end just out of interest? Yes I remember! My marriage ended three years ago this Sept. Ironically, my composite with my exhusband is very similar to this, because he and this man were born two weeks apart. Houses are different, and degree of the sun mercury and venus stellium.I am afraid of Todd's read! Sorry Todd! I love to read your views, but they are pretty harsh. mereiposaWow, girl. you are on it!Our relationship is in round three. We never formally dated, it was very much about being together at home. Maybe this is the unorthodox quality? None of my friends or family approve because we don't date, and we don't spend the night at each other's houses, and we don't attend get togethers with each other. It's hidden, but not secret. However this is strange since our stellium is in the 10th, a very public place. I am good with this. I would like to go do fun things with him from time to time, but between our schedules we always opt for being together at one of our houses (composite moon 4th house rings very true here). I broke it off initially because it definitely was not fulfilling emotionally, but I have never stopped wanting to be with him. And as he is the one that returns and asks to start up again, he feels the same. I know where the on/offs are. We have talked about them. He's afraid of being hurt again, as am I. So we are addressing these chirotic 8th house fears. We both are very independent and want space. I am wondering if accepting an unconventional setup (separate houses, no marriage- which is what I want with him) is management of these challenges.The concern for me is that my ex-husband is two weeks younger than this man, therefore the composite is ridiculously close. As I said to EmGem, houses and degrees of the stellium and moon are different.And PS: Boy do I really appreciate your input, Girl and EmGem! There is such support from a group of people helping to talk it out and walk through these tangles in a relationship.mereiposaAlso, I just met a man with a Libra sun, ASC on my NN in Virgo, along with mercury and moon. His venus was in Libra, exactly on my sun/moon midpoint. Nothing. Nada. No connection! I felt like he had no depth. He came across as shallow, immature, and inconsiderate of other. Which was a bummer because I was very excited about the potential. I like NN connections and don't have that many of them in my composites.mereiposaCan I bump this please for more insight?Thank you!EmGemMereiposa, no matter what astrology says, take some time to sit with this rel and note how it truly feels in your body (which doesn't lie) and on your heart especially. Analyses aside, does it 'feel' right? Go from there take a chance, life is too short. I would t worry that the chart is similar to your ex's. Even people born on the same day may be entirely different. For what it's worth my uncle and aunt have been together 30 years and they have Venus square Uranus on their composite (although yours is a little wide) - with some hiccups of course but never broken up. Also I like to look at pattern completion and you guys have an almost envelope which must be a good thing! mereiposaThank you EmGem. You're right, and I know it. I am looking for answers that don't exist. The truth is that I don't feel like I can walk away from him. I would always wonder, what if. And I am using the chart as a crutch. These are my fears and perfectionistic tendencies all rolled up in one. I don't want to screw up another relationship. I want permanency. And that's just not something anyone can guarantee. Interestingly, every time he is back in my life, I see 1111 everywhere. When he is gone, I don't. I feel strongly we are supposed to have something together, I just don't know what it entails or how long it lasts. So thank you for your insight, because you're right. Relationships are hard. Trusting is hard. EmGemHell yes I hear you! I want permanency too. To feel safe, valued and heard. Absolutely there are no guarantees. Trusting and letting go are the hardest things to do especially when it comes to love..I think taking a chance on love is the best option here because you don't want to live with regrets. But at the same time I wonder if you could seek counsel and work on these aspects of yourself to allow you to truly feel safe within your own body no matter what. Whether the rel succeeds or not. The most important thing is to feel whole and enough within you, to know you can survive whether he is there or not. This will stand you in good stead for the relationship or any for that matter because you will be coming from a place of security as opposed to insecurity. Hope that makes sense Oh 11:11 I have seen every day since I met my soulmate argh.... I feel you!
I dream about him, and they are usually premonition or symbolic dreams. He was the one with the control and the power previously, but I feel a subtle shift. I think it's me now. I am comfortable with our synastry, but our composite is what I am unsure of.
In the composite I see all the outer planets fighting everything else. There is definitely love, and our composite hits many significant points in our charts, midpoints too. But so many struggles.
Could you take a look please and help me see?
Me:
Him:
Composite:
But your NN is getting hit up the wazoo, and whatever else happens with this relationship, you should take note of the example he sets in Virgo and 10th house areas--the vibe he sends out, how he handles his career, calling, and daily routines--because his way of being has something to teach you about what would fulfill you in terms of your own life, whatever happens in the relationship.
One of the reasons the connection may have felt precarious to you or like you were the one who needed more from it might have been that NN contact--he has or embodies or does something you want for yourself--there's some way you want to be like him.
I have never looked at it like that. I do need things he has. He is going where I came from, and I'm going where he was (NN/SN opposites). My ex-husband was born two weeks after this man, so the natal charts are somewhat similar and the composite similar too. I have to remind myself that there are significant differences, and for the composite the houses are different. But I know how my marriage ended and I just don't want this to go that route.
I've never had a composite full of trines and ease, and In my heart I believe I need these tensions to propel me to where I need to be. Even my best friends have a tension filled composite with me. But trusting that this will be ok is hard!
quote:Originally posted by mereiposa:[B] I am so afraid of this relationship blowing up again. I dream about him, and they are usually premonition or symbolic dreams.
I dream about him, and they are usually premonition or symbolic dreams.
I can tell that the main reason for your attractions can be:- your ascendants aren't square but in signs which are naturally square: this usually happens with the fixed signs too, and I have seen attractions happening a lot and very often between Leo AS and Scorpio AS, as those two signs are all about sex and power underneath. - your marses again square or in signs naturally square (yours in virgo, his in sag)- his moon conjunct your neptune: this is why you can tend to idealize each other and have profound dreams of one another. in my own personal experiences, hard neptune aspects (conjunctions, opposition and square) to the sun, moon and/or venus, can often lead to the neptune person "fading away" as in physically disappearing. as neptune is all about ideal love and once the pressures of "real" life happen, neptune tends to feel that this isn't ideal and so he/she leaves.
and the reason you have fear about the relationship ending, is because of chiron in the 8th composite house. composite charts can never be controlled by the two people in the relationship (in contrast to natal charts, where a person can choose to modify his/her energies to some extent in life), as they show circumstances or themes which always be present in the relationship. when two people choose to enter a relationship, it would be very beneficial to look at the composite and tell them what exist there, if they choose to enter this together, as it will never change. with chiron in the 8th, there can be constant fears about being cheated on or one person abandoning the other. chiron in your composite is also opposite uranus which rules divorce. so it is as if both of you feel that anything can happen in this relationship, and there can be very little feeling of security or trust here.
------------------pisces moontaurus midheavenleo ascendanttaurus suncancer mars and venus
I think our friendship is coming from Sun sextile Venus DW (they are wide, but from my understanding bcs it's a DW they count) and his Venus trine my Moon. His Jupiter to my Sun and Moon, my Jupiter to his Venus.
Uranus opp Chiron in composite rules divorce? I think I remember that from somewhere, but my recent searches haven't shown that again yet. That would hold true with my marriage. And many broken or severed friendships. Unfortunately, I have that aspect with everyone. Across a wide range of ages. I don't need to get married again, but I do want a companion in my life. And I do want that companion to be long term, as in forever!
Chiron in the 8th interpretation is one I had not heard. I suppose as Chiron is about healing, this fear can be addressed and healed. I don't have a fear of being cheated on, but I did in my marriage. A huge one in fact. Our chiron was in the 6th though. With this man, it may come in to play if our relationship were to sustain itself for a long period of time.
So the question I posed on the other thread, would that troubling Uranus square and opposition in the composite be easier to deal with if both people had challenging Uranus in their natal charts? I suppose theoretically, yes. But who knows what challenges it will actually bring.
One other thing, in the other forum an old post of IQs on Sabian symbols came up. Our composite hits a lot of these important Sabian degrees. Our Sun and Venus for example. So the identity of and our love within the relationship may bring with it profound growth and contribution to our individual paths. Knowing my personal journey, I am thinking this is an important relationship for my spiritual growth. And in that mindset, I need to focus on the present moment. Let go of the past, and not worry about the future. I cannot change things, and if I try to avoid hurt I will miss the gifts this exchange could bring.
quote:Originally posted by mereiposa:[B]Well our ASC are actually trine. I'm Scorp 28, and he's Cancer 29.
Mereiposa, I can relate to a few things you have mentioned and this quite possibly is because of your chart being so similar to my progressed, as we've discovered before When did your marriage end just out of interest?
quote:Originally posted by mereiposa:[B]Uranus opp Chiron in composite rules divorce?
uranus alone rules divorce, separation or long-distance themed relationships. I have found uranus very present in the composites of couples where one or both have a prominent scorpio.
Naturally, people with sun, AS, or personal planets in Scorpio will almost never trust another person, not even their closest one. So they prefer to keep a certain amount of distance for their own reasons. Others usually find these people quite intense too, especially if they have the sun or the moon in a mutable or incompatible sign. This can result in a relationship where distance is mutually preferred.
house 8th is whatever is felt deep beneath the surface of the relationship and yet one that the two prefer to keep a secret to themselves and never talk about. In your composite chiron is there, and there is a chance that you guys will almost never trust one another enough to open up about your traumas to one another, as you may fear that the other may abandon you for this. On the contrary, if you decide together to be honest about everything, and decide on mutual trust, a great deal of closeness and healing is possible. but chiron has this characteristic which is in fact never being satisfied and "full". there can be endless loops of trying to trust, and trust being broken.
when composite uranus is threatening the 8th house, it worsens all that exists there. lots of upheaves are expected anyway.
quote:Originally posted by mereiposa:So the identity of and our love within the relationship may bring with it profound growth and contribution to our individual paths. Knowing my personal journey, I am thinking this is an important relationship for my spiritual growth. And in that mindset, I need to focus on the present moment. Let go of the past, and not worry about the future. I cannot change things, and if I try to avoid hurt I will miss the gifts this exchange could bring.
I very much agree and encourage you to show this man the green light if you sensed his attraction too. But also don't hesitate to leave if you weren't treated the way you desire. remember that relationships are about give and take and "both" people must enjoy, and feel loved and comfortable in the relationship. What you need the most, is what will bring you the most growth and joy. But not necessarily everybody who comes into your path will bring you that.
My personal belief is that whenever we feel a possible connection, there sure is a part of ourselves that we are looking at through the mirror of the other. So we start to give and watch the other's reaction. if they give back, this relationship has potential for greatness. if the other is still unmature (no matter what their age) and a small person, the relationship is only a waste of time and money, no matter how tightly the venus and mars are conjunct or the man's sun is square the woman's moon.
and just because I am a sucker for matchmaking, I am also interested to know if such man will ever come across path and how you guys will end up!
his AS in virgo or capsun in Libramoon in late scorpio
quote:Originally posted by EmGem:Id love to hear Todd's take on your composite! He's an expert on midpoints.Mereiposa, I can relate to a few things you have mentioned and this quite possibly is because of your chart being so similar to my progressed, as we've discovered before When did your marriage end just out of interest?
Yes I remember!
My marriage ended three years ago this Sept. Ironically, my composite with my exhusband is very similar to this, because he and this man were born two weeks apart. Houses are different, and degree of the sun mercury and venus stellium.
I am afraid of Todd's read! Sorry Todd! I love to read your views, but they are pretty harsh.
Our relationship is in round three. We never formally dated, it was very much about being together at home. Maybe this is the unorthodox quality? None of my friends or family approve because we don't date, and we don't spend the night at each other's houses, and we don't attend get togethers with each other. It's hidden, but not secret. However this is strange since our stellium is in the 10th, a very public place. I am good with this. I would like to go do fun things with him from time to time, but between our schedules we always opt for being together at one of our houses (composite moon 4th house rings very true here). I broke it off initially because it definitely was not fulfilling emotionally, but I have never stopped wanting to be with him. And as he is the one that returns and asks to start up again, he feels the same.
I know where the on/offs are. We have talked about them. He's afraid of being hurt again, as am I. So we are addressing these chirotic 8th house fears. We both are very independent and want space. I am wondering if accepting an unconventional setup (separate houses, no marriage- which is what I want with him) is management of these challenges.
The concern for me is that my ex-husband is two weeks younger than this man, therefore the composite is ridiculously close. As I said to EmGem, houses and degrees of the stellium and moon are different.
And PS: Boy do I really appreciate your input, Girl and EmGem! There is such support from a group of people helping to talk it out and walk through these tangles in a relationship.
I just met a man with a Libra sun, ASC on my NN in Virgo, along with mercury and moon. His venus was in Libra, exactly on my sun/moon midpoint.
Nothing. Nada. No connection! I felt like he had no depth. He came across as shallow, immature, and inconsiderate of other. Which was a bummer because I was very excited about the potential. I like NN connections and don't have that many of them in my composites.
Thank you!
You're right, and I know it. I am looking for answers that don't exist. The truth is that I don't feel like I can walk away from him. I would always wonder, what if.
And I am using the chart as a crutch. These are my fears and perfectionistic tendencies all rolled up in one. I don't want to screw up another relationship. I want permanency. And that's just not something anyone can guarantee.
Interestingly, every time he is back in my life, I see 1111 everywhere. When he is gone, I don't. I feel strongly we are supposed to have something together, I just don't know what it entails or how long it lasts.
So thank you for your insight, because you're right. Relationships are hard. Trusting is hard.
Oh 11:11 I have seen every day since I met my soulmate argh.... I feel you!
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