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T O P I C R E V I E WBismarckSo apparently, according to Todd, this is a relationship destroyer. Anybody have any experiences with it? Does anything alleviate it? Hikaru29Hmm... my friend and her ex-husband have this in Composite. Both also have the same aspect in Natal which may have been the reason why they lasted for 16 long years.General interpretation to this is that the harsh aspects make a couple vulnerable to r/s difficulties and they tend to break up easily when the going gets tough. The harmonious aspects, on the other hand, aid in strengthening the bond between two and there's a higher chance for them to stick together through difficult times.Another friend of mine also has this aspect with a guy she loves. Within less than a year, they've broken up twice and reconciled twice so I guess despite the square, it makes it hard to let go. Extremely volatile nonetheless. They might just break up a 3rd time.todd quote:Originally posted by Hikaru29:Hmm... my friend and her ex-husband have this in Composite. Both also have the same aspect in Natal which may have been the reason why they lasted for 16 long years.General interpretation to this is that the harsh aspects make a couple vulnerable to r/s difficulties and they tend to break up easily when the going gets tough. The harmonious aspects, on the other hand, aid in strengthening the bond between two and there's a higher chance for them to stick together through difficult times.Another friend of mine also has this aspect with a guy she loves. Within less than a year, they've broken up twice and reconciled twice so I guess despite the square, it makes it hard to let go. Extremely volatile nonetheless. They might just break up a 3rd time."Both also have the same aspect in Natal which may have been the reason why they lasted for 16 long years."I have found that true. if both natals have the hard aspect that is in the composite then, the most difficult composite aspects can work. it seems that if both partners have worked with the difficult aspect in their lives, then they know before hand how to deal with the energies of the hard aspect in a composite.just a note. an aspect in a composite chart can appear with neither partner having the aspect natally or a composite aspect can appear when both have the aspect in their natal charts.toddBismarck quote:Originally posted by todd: "Both also have the same aspect in Natal which may have been the reason why they lasted for 16 long years."I have found that true. if both natals have the hard aspect that is in the composite then, the most difficult composite aspects can work. it seems that if both partners have worked with the difficult aspect in their lives, then they know before hand how to deal with the energies of the hard aspect in a composite.just a note. an aspect in a composite chart can appear with neither partner having the aspect natally or a composite aspect can appear when both have the aspect in their natal charts.toddSurely there must be something that can alleviate it other than having the aspects natally?Can you check out the charts I posted in another thread and tell me what you think, todd? Here's the thread: http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum35/HTML/008761.html toddhi Bismarckthe sun/moon square to chiron is also not very favorable for the long term because arguments can be very nasty.you are in a definitive period for this relationship because the the nodal axis is transiting through your mars/venus square. definitive because this period should be very loving and affectionate. if it is not good right now then there will never be a time when this relationship will work. I would have thought that you got together inn November past, and currently that node is squaring mercury. so if there are arguments right now that is extremely unfavorable because with the node square to mercury you and she should be opening up and sharing your thoughts of love and life.toddBismarck quote:Originally posted by todd:hi Bismarckthe sun/moon square to chiron is also not very favorable for the long term because arguments can be very nasty.you are in a definitive period for this relationship because the the nodal axis is transiting through your mars/venus square. definitive because this period should be very loving and affectionate. if it is not good right now then there will never be a time when this relationship will work. I would have thought that you got together inn November past, and currently that node is squaring mercury. so if there are arguments right now that is extremely unfavorable because with the node square to mercury you and she should be opening up and sharing your thoughts of love and life.toddThanks, but i'm only interested in her. We don't know eachother yet. Regardless, thank you for your input. Question though: doesn't chiron square sun signify a permanent limitation or wound in the relationship? RandallBump!RandallBump!Bismarck2 quote:Originally posted by todd:hi Bismarckthe sun/moon square to chiron is also not very favorable for the long term because arguments can be very nasty.you are in a definitive period for this relationship because the the nodal axis is transiting through your mars/venus square. definitive because this period should be very loving and affectionate. if it is not good right now then there will never be a time when this relationship will work. I would have thought that you got together inn November past, and currently that node is squaring mercury. so if there are arguments right now that is extremely unfavorable because with the node square to mercury you and she should be opening up and sharing your thoughts of love and life.toddShe has both sun/saturn square and sun/chiron square natally, btw. http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum35/HTML/008761.html Hikaru29I just want to give you some silver lining if you're still interested in her. Another couple I know also has Pluto/Saturn square in Composite. The guy has the same aspect in natal but not his wife. They've been married for about 20yrs. Granted they have their difficulties (well, all couples have!) but I don't see divorce happening.Bismarck2 quote:Originally posted by Hikaru29:I just want to give you some silver lining if you're still interested in her. Another couple I know also has Pluto/Saturn square in Composite. The guy has the same aspect in natal but not his wife. They've been married for about 20yrs. Granted they have their difficulties (well, all couples have!) but I don't see divorce happening.Nice to know, thanks! What other aspects do they have? Hikaru29 quote:Originally posted by Bismarck2: Nice to know, thanks! What other aspects do they have? Their main challenge is their Mars/Saturn conjunction square Pluto opposite Venus/Jupiter t-squares. Besides this, they also have Uranus opposite Sun/Mercury.They have a lot of other aspects:Sun/Mercury/Chiron conjunctSun sextile Moon/VertexSun quintile SaturnMoon conjunct LilithMoon trine Mars/Saturn/UranusMoon square Neptune/NodesMercury sextile MarsVenus conjunct Jupiter/ErosVenus trine NN, square VertexMars trine Uranus/LilithJuno trine Jupiter, sextile Pluto, square MoonUranus trine Vertex, opposite Chiron/Ceres conjunctionAnd several quincunxes, sesqui.. etcBismarck2 quote:Originally posted by Hikaru29: Their main challenge is their Mars/Saturn conjunction square Pluto opposite Venus/Jupiter t-squares. Besides this, they also have Uranus opposite Sun/Mercury.They have a lot of other aspects:Sun/Mercury/Chiron conjunctSun sextile Moon/VertexSun quintile SaturnMoon conjunct LilithMoon trine Mars/Saturn/UranusMoon square Neptune/NodesMercury sextile MarsVenus conjunct Jupiter/ErosVenus trine NN, square VertexMars trine Uranus/LilithJuno trine Jupiter, sextile Pluto, square MoonUranus trine Vertex, opposite Chiron/Ceres conjunctionAnd several quincunxes, sesqui.. etcWow, a mars/saturn conjunction square pluto? That sounds really bad. I'm surprised they lasted that long. Hikaru29 quote:Originally posted by Bismarck2: Wow, a mars/saturn conjunction square pluto? That sounds really bad. I'm surprised they lasted that long. He told me that they argue a lot. I guess it really depends on how much 2 people wanna make it work?Bismarck2 quote:Originally posted by Hikaru29: He told me that they argue a lot. I guess it really depends on how much 2 people wanna make it work?A Sun/Uranus opposition wouldn't do much for the stability either. Weird. Hikaru29 quote:Originally posted by Bismarck2:A Sun/Uranus opposition wouldn't do much for the stability either. Weird. I believe there're other stuff that kept them together. Chiron is binding... they also have a grand kite in water/earth signs and Saturn/Mars is in this formation trining Moon/Uranus, sextile Mercury. This gives Saturn/Mars an outlet to release the tension from the t-squares. In their Davison, they have 2 mystic rectangles and a grand cross. He said that he won't ever leave her because she has sacrificed a lot for him... in Synastry, they have Saturn-Venus DW. Says much. We all know Saturn is binding and karmic, and seems even more so when in DWs. Bismarck2 quote:Originally posted by Hikaru29: I believe there're other stuff that kept them together. Chiron is binding... they also have a grand kite in water/earth signs and Saturn/Mars is in this formation trining Moon/Uranus, sextile Mercury. This gives Saturn/Mars an outlet to release the tension from the t-squares. In their Davison, they have 2 mystic rectangles and a grand cross. He said that he won't ever leave her because she has sacrificed a lot for him... in Synastry, they have Saturn-Venus DW. Says much. We all know Saturn is binding and karmic, and seems even more so when in DWs. Saturn putting in work. That explains it. AriesLilithHey guys, I hope you don’t mind me joining in because this topic is something I often think about.I’ve been together with my husband for 14 years. We have a composite with many nice aspects, like Venus/Mars/Juno conjunction trine to Saturn and oppose to Jupiter, and a few nice midpoints. But we also have an ugly pattern of 2 yods involving Chiron, Moon, NN, Pluto, Neptune. Saturn/Pluto midpoint forming tsquare to Nessus and Mercury, Psyche. Moon square Neptune and midpoint square Saturn kind of aspects.There is friendship, attraction, laugher, a child-like love (Sun/Moon midpoint and Eros/Psyche midpoint aspects), and so on. Strong desire of commitment and family building.But the blockage of emotional and mental connection has always been there. The pain and resentment, instability (Saturn/Uranus midpoint aspecting angles) has always been there.I’ve wondered for a long time why I always stayed. Despite what I consider fundamental lacking. Was it the good aspects?But in my natal chart I have Saturn/Ixion and Saturn/Pluto square Nessus. I’ve realised recently, by reflecting on my past and childhood, how I’m too used to emotional negligence and attract people who are too cinical and critical.I often internalized as my own fault too even thought I complained about the lack of something. As I could see with more clarity now I see why I accepted all these trying to think as acceptable or normal.So maybe by having similar patterns or same aspect in natal can show a person who is better worked the difficulty, or that some lessons needed to be learned. Because we are oblivious and can’t see the pattern clear.I don’t think that good aspects would make bad ones forgotten. It makes the relationship better but issues can still be there.Since then I’m learning a lot about my own patterns.It’s so strange because I began to notice how a few men in my life, including my father and best friend are cinical and critical. Very Ixion and sometimes Nessus. I just never reslly paid attention. Now I find it a turn-off, and I don’t like this energy as it brings down people around and Iprefer more positive people.But until I noticed I was just comfortable with them. Even thought certain things were not ideal.Bismarck2 quote:Originally posted by AriesLilith:Hey guys, I hope you don’t mind me joining in because this topic is something I often think about.I’ve been together with my husband for 14 years. We have a composite with many nice aspects, like Venus/Mars/Juno conjunction trine to Saturn and oppose to Jupiter, and a few nice midpoints. But we also have an ugly pattern of 2 yods involving Chiron, Moon, NN, Pluto, Neptune. Saturn/Pluto midpoint forming tsquare to Nessus and Mercury, Psyche. Moon square Neptune and midpoint square Saturn kind of aspects.There is friendship, attraction, laugher, a child-like love (Sun/Moon midpoint and Eros/Psyche midpoint aspects), and so on. Strong desire of commitment and family building.But the blockage of emotional and mental connection has always been there. The pain and resentment, instability (Saturn/Uranus midpoint aspecting angles) has always been there.I’ve wondered for a long time why I always stayed. Despite what I consider fundamental lacking. Was it the good aspects?But in my natal chart I have Saturn/Ixion and Saturn/Pluto square Nessus. I’ve realised recently, by reflecting on my past and childhood, how I’m too used to emotional negligence and attract people who are too cinical and critical.I often internalized as my own fault too even thought I complained about the lack of something. As I could see with more clarity now I see why I accepted all these trying to think as acceptable or normal.So maybe by having similar patterns or same aspect in natal can show a person who is better worked the difficulty, or that some lessons needed to be learned. Because we are oblivious and can’t see the pattern clear.I don’t think that good aspects would make bad ones forgotten. It makes the relationship better but issues can still be there.Since then I’m learning a lot about my own patterns.It’s so strange because I began to notice how a few men in my life, including my father and best friend are cinical and critical. Very Ixion and sometimes Nessus. I just never reslly paid attention. Now I find it a turn-off, and I don’t like this energy as it brings down people around and Iprefer more positive people.But until I noticed I was just comfortable with them. Even thought certain things were not ideal.Interesting. I never bothered to consider midpoints in a midpoint chart. Can you post the composite please for further demonstration? AriesLilith quote:Originally posted by Bismarck2: Interesting. I never bothered to consider midpoints in a midpoint chart. Can you post the composite please for further demonstration? Sure. Here it is: Bismarck2 quote:Originally posted by AriesLilith:[B] Sure. Here it is:........Where are the yods? I see Saturn makes a minor hard aspect to the moon. That might also explain the lack of connection. AriesLilith quote:Originally posted by Bismarck2: Where are the yods? I see Saturn makes a minor hard aspect to the moon. That might also explain the lack of connection. Moon sextile AC/Chiron/NN both quincunx Pluto, and Pluto sextile Neptune both quincunx AC/Chiron/NN.Other hard aspects include Sun square Pluto and Moon square Neptune.Underneath the compatibility and nice aspects, we both have unconscious issues that keeps conflicting in the relationship. Personal baggages that keeps surfacing and inhibiting the necessary vulnerability and empathy to allow emotional connection.Bismarck2 quote:Originally posted by AriesLilith: Moon sextile AC/Chiron/NN both quincunx Pluto, and Pluto sextile Neptune both quincunx AC/Chiron/NN.Other hard aspects include Sun square Pluto and Moon square Neptune.Underneath the compatibility and nice aspects, we both have unconscious issues that keeps conflicting in the relationship. Personal baggages that keeps surfacing and inhibiting the necessary vulnerability and empathy to allow emotional connection.I see. It's good that you stuck it out for so long, and with such humility. Seems like a very saturnian relationship. RandallBump!
Does anything alleviate it?
General interpretation to this is that the harsh aspects make a couple vulnerable to r/s difficulties and they tend to break up easily when the going gets tough. The harmonious aspects, on the other hand, aid in strengthening the bond between two and there's a higher chance for them to stick together through difficult times.
Another friend of mine also has this aspect with a guy she loves. Within less than a year, they've broken up twice and reconciled twice so I guess despite the square, it makes it hard to let go. Extremely volatile nonetheless. They might just break up a 3rd time.
quote:Originally posted by Hikaru29:Hmm... my friend and her ex-husband have this in Composite. Both also have the same aspect in Natal which may have been the reason why they lasted for 16 long years.General interpretation to this is that the harsh aspects make a couple vulnerable to r/s difficulties and they tend to break up easily when the going gets tough. The harmonious aspects, on the other hand, aid in strengthening the bond between two and there's a higher chance for them to stick together through difficult times.Another friend of mine also has this aspect with a guy she loves. Within less than a year, they've broken up twice and reconciled twice so I guess despite the square, it makes it hard to let go. Extremely volatile nonetheless. They might just break up a 3rd time.
"Both also have the same aspect in Natal which may have been the reason why they lasted for 16 long years."
I have found that true. if both natals have the hard aspect that is in the composite then, the most difficult composite aspects can work. it seems that if both partners have worked with the difficult aspect in their lives, then they know before hand how to deal with the energies of the hard aspect in a composite.
just a note. an aspect in a composite chart can appear with neither partner having the aspect natally or a composite aspect can appear when both have the aspect in their natal charts.
todd
quote:Originally posted by todd: "Both also have the same aspect in Natal which may have been the reason why they lasted for 16 long years."I have found that true. if both natals have the hard aspect that is in the composite then, the most difficult composite aspects can work. it seems that if both partners have worked with the difficult aspect in their lives, then they know before hand how to deal with the energies of the hard aspect in a composite.just a note. an aspect in a composite chart can appear with neither partner having the aspect natally or a composite aspect can appear when both have the aspect in their natal charts.todd
Surely there must be something that can alleviate it other than having the aspects natally?
Can you check out the charts I posted in another thread and tell me what you think, todd? Here's the thread: http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum35/HTML/008761.html
the sun/moon square to chiron is also not very favorable for the long term because arguments can be very nasty.
you are in a definitive period for this relationship because the the nodal axis is transiting through your mars/venus square. definitive because this period should be very loving and affectionate. if it is not good right now then there will never be a time when this relationship will work.
I would have thought that you got together inn November past, and currently that node is squaring mercury. so if there are arguments right now that is extremely unfavorable because with the node square to mercury you and she should be opening up and sharing your thoughts of love and life.todd
quote:Originally posted by todd:hi Bismarckthe sun/moon square to chiron is also not very favorable for the long term because arguments can be very nasty.you are in a definitive period for this relationship because the the nodal axis is transiting through your mars/venus square. definitive because this period should be very loving and affectionate. if it is not good right now then there will never be a time when this relationship will work. I would have thought that you got together inn November past, and currently that node is squaring mercury. so if there are arguments right now that is extremely unfavorable because with the node square to mercury you and she should be opening up and sharing your thoughts of love and life.todd
Thanks, but i'm only interested in her. We don't know eachother yet. Regardless, thank you for your input.
Question though: doesn't chiron square sun signify a permanent limitation or wound in the relationship?
She has both sun/saturn square and sun/chiron square natally, btw. http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum35/HTML/008761.html
quote:Originally posted by Hikaru29:I just want to give you some silver lining if you're still interested in her. Another couple I know also has Pluto/Saturn square in Composite. The guy has the same aspect in natal but not his wife. They've been married for about 20yrs. Granted they have their difficulties (well, all couples have!) but I don't see divorce happening.
Nice to know, thanks! What other aspects do they have?
quote:Originally posted by Bismarck2: Nice to know, thanks! What other aspects do they have?
Their main challenge is their Mars/Saturn conjunction square Pluto opposite Venus/Jupiter t-squares. Besides this, they also have Uranus opposite Sun/Mercury.
They have a lot of other aspects:
Sun/Mercury/Chiron conjunctSun sextile Moon/VertexSun quintile SaturnMoon conjunct LilithMoon trine Mars/Saturn/UranusMoon square Neptune/NodesMercury sextile MarsVenus conjunct Jupiter/ErosVenus trine NN, square VertexMars trine Uranus/LilithJuno trine Jupiter, sextile Pluto, square MoonUranus trine Vertex, opposite Chiron/Ceres conjunction
And several quincunxes, sesqui.. etc
quote:Originally posted by Hikaru29: Their main challenge is their Mars/Saturn conjunction square Pluto opposite Venus/Jupiter t-squares. Besides this, they also have Uranus opposite Sun/Mercury.They have a lot of other aspects:Sun/Mercury/Chiron conjunctSun sextile Moon/VertexSun quintile SaturnMoon conjunct LilithMoon trine Mars/Saturn/UranusMoon square Neptune/NodesMercury sextile MarsVenus conjunct Jupiter/ErosVenus trine NN, square VertexMars trine Uranus/LilithJuno trine Jupiter, sextile Pluto, square MoonUranus trine Vertex, opposite Chiron/Ceres conjunctionAnd several quincunxes, sesqui.. etc
Wow, a mars/saturn conjunction square pluto? That sounds really bad. I'm surprised they lasted that long.
quote:Originally posted by Bismarck2: Wow, a mars/saturn conjunction square pluto? That sounds really bad. I'm surprised they lasted that long.
He told me that they argue a lot. I guess it really depends on how much 2 people wanna make it work?
quote:Originally posted by Hikaru29: He told me that they argue a lot. I guess it really depends on how much 2 people wanna make it work?
A Sun/Uranus opposition wouldn't do much for the stability either. Weird.
quote:Originally posted by Bismarck2:A Sun/Uranus opposition wouldn't do much for the stability either. Weird.
I believe there're other stuff that kept them together. Chiron is binding... they also have a grand kite in water/earth signs and Saturn/Mars is in this formation trining Moon/Uranus, sextile Mercury. This gives Saturn/Mars an outlet to release the tension from the t-squares. In their Davison, they have 2 mystic rectangles and a grand cross.
He said that he won't ever leave her because she has sacrificed a lot for him... in Synastry, they have Saturn-Venus DW. Says much. We all know Saturn is binding and karmic, and seems even more so when in DWs.
quote:Originally posted by Hikaru29: I believe there're other stuff that kept them together. Chiron is binding... they also have a grand kite in water/earth signs and Saturn/Mars is in this formation trining Moon/Uranus, sextile Mercury. This gives Saturn/Mars an outlet to release the tension from the t-squares. In their Davison, they have 2 mystic rectangles and a grand cross. He said that he won't ever leave her because she has sacrificed a lot for him... in Synastry, they have Saturn-Venus DW. Says much. We all know Saturn is binding and karmic, and seems even more so when in DWs.
Saturn putting in work. That explains it.
There is friendship, attraction, laugher, a child-like love (Sun/Moon midpoint and Eros/Psyche midpoint aspects), and so on. Strong desire of commitment and family building.
But the blockage of emotional and mental connection has always been there. The pain and resentment, instability (Saturn/Uranus midpoint aspecting angles) has always been there.
I’ve wondered for a long time why I always stayed. Despite what I consider fundamental lacking. Was it the good aspects?
But in my natal chart I have Saturn/Ixion and Saturn/Pluto square Nessus. I’ve realised recently, by reflecting on my past and childhood, how I’m too used to emotional negligence and attract people who are too cinical and critical.I often internalized as my own fault too even thought I complained about the lack of something. As I could see with more clarity now I see why I accepted all these trying to think as acceptable or normal.
So maybe by having similar patterns or same aspect in natal can show a person who is better worked the difficulty, or that some lessons needed to be learned. Because we are oblivious and can’t see the pattern clear.
I don’t think that good aspects would make bad ones forgotten. It makes the relationship better but issues can still be there.
Since then I’m learning a lot about my own patterns.
It’s so strange because I began to notice how a few men in my life, including my father and best friend are cinical and critical. Very Ixion and sometimes Nessus. I just never reslly paid attention. Now I find it a turn-off, and I don’t like this energy as it brings down people around and Iprefer more positive people.But until I noticed I was just comfortable with them. Even thought certain things were not ideal.
quote:Originally posted by AriesLilith:Hey guys, I hope you don’t mind me joining in because this topic is something I often think about.I’ve been together with my husband for 14 years. We have a composite with many nice aspects, like Venus/Mars/Juno conjunction trine to Saturn and oppose to Jupiter, and a few nice midpoints. But we also have an ugly pattern of 2 yods involving Chiron, Moon, NN, Pluto, Neptune. Saturn/Pluto midpoint forming tsquare to Nessus and Mercury, Psyche. Moon square Neptune and midpoint square Saturn kind of aspects.There is friendship, attraction, laugher, a child-like love (Sun/Moon midpoint and Eros/Psyche midpoint aspects), and so on. Strong desire of commitment and family building.But the blockage of emotional and mental connection has always been there. The pain and resentment, instability (Saturn/Uranus midpoint aspecting angles) has always been there.I’ve wondered for a long time why I always stayed. Despite what I consider fundamental lacking. Was it the good aspects?But in my natal chart I have Saturn/Ixion and Saturn/Pluto square Nessus. I’ve realised recently, by reflecting on my past and childhood, how I’m too used to emotional negligence and attract people who are too cinical and critical.I often internalized as my own fault too even thought I complained about the lack of something. As I could see with more clarity now I see why I accepted all these trying to think as acceptable or normal.So maybe by having similar patterns or same aspect in natal can show a person who is better worked the difficulty, or that some lessons needed to be learned. Because we are oblivious and can’t see the pattern clear.I don’t think that good aspects would make bad ones forgotten. It makes the relationship better but issues can still be there.Since then I’m learning a lot about my own patterns.It’s so strange because I began to notice how a few men in my life, including my father and best friend are cinical and critical. Very Ixion and sometimes Nessus. I just never reslly paid attention. Now I find it a turn-off, and I don’t like this energy as it brings down people around and Iprefer more positive people.But until I noticed I was just comfortable with them. Even thought certain things were not ideal.
Interesting. I never bothered to consider midpoints in a midpoint chart. Can you post the composite please for further demonstration?
quote:Originally posted by Bismarck2: Interesting. I never bothered to consider midpoints in a midpoint chart. Can you post the composite please for further demonstration?
Sure. Here it is:
quote:Originally posted by AriesLilith:[B] Sure. Here it is:........
........
Where are the yods? I see Saturn makes a minor hard aspect to the moon. That might also explain the lack of connection.
quote:Originally posted by Bismarck2: Where are the yods? I see Saturn makes a minor hard aspect to the moon. That might also explain the lack of connection.
Moon sextile AC/Chiron/NN both quincunx Pluto, and Pluto sextile Neptune both quincunx AC/Chiron/NN.
Other hard aspects include Sun square Pluto and Moon square Neptune.
Underneath the compatibility and nice aspects, we both have unconscious issues that keeps conflicting in the relationship. Personal baggages that keeps surfacing and inhibiting the necessary vulnerability and empathy to allow emotional connection.
quote:Originally posted by AriesLilith: Moon sextile AC/Chiron/NN both quincunx Pluto, and Pluto sextile Neptune both quincunx AC/Chiron/NN.Other hard aspects include Sun square Pluto and Moon square Neptune.Underneath the compatibility and nice aspects, we both have unconscious issues that keeps conflicting in the relationship. Personal baggages that keeps surfacing and inhibiting the necessary vulnerability and empathy to allow emotional connection.
I see. It's good that you stuck it out for so long, and with such humility. Seems like a very saturnian relationship.
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