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T O P I C R E V I E WLEXXI added a "q" and an "e" and changed an "s" to a "z" to get past censor.Go the fucqk to sleep - Presentation Transcript http://www.slideshare.net/spencermolly/go-the-f-to-sleep-7940745 quote:“Total genius.” –Jonathan Lethem, father of two. quote:“This is no-guilt funny and a godsend!” –Cristina García, mother of one.Go the **** to Sleep by Adam Mansbach illustrated by Ricardo Cortés!""# $%&()# $*)*$+*,-& for Vivien, without whom none of this would be possible! quote:The cats nestle close to their kittens now.The lambs have laid down with the sheep.You’re cozy and warm in your bed, my dear. Please go the fucqk to sleep.The windows are dark in the town, child.The whales huddle down in the deep.I’ll read you one very last book if you swear You’ll go the fucqk to sleep.The eagles who soar through the sky are at rest And the creatures who crawl, run, and creep.I know you’re not thirsty. That’s bullshite . Stop lying.Lie the fucqk down, my darling, and sleep.The wind whispers soft through the grass, hon.The field mice, they make not a peep.It’s been thirty-eight minutes already.Jesus Christ, what the fucqk? Go to sleep.All the kids from day care are in dreamland.The froggie has made his last leap.Hell no, you can’t go to the bathroom.You know where you can go? The fucqk to sleep.The owls fly forth from the treetops.Through the air, they soar and they sweep.A hot crimson rage fills my heart, love.For real, shut the fucqk up and sleep.The cubs and the lions are snoring,Wrapped in a big snuggly heap.How is it you can do all this other great shite But you can’t lie the fucqk down and sleep?The seeds slumber beneath the earth now And the crops that the farmers will reap.No more questions. This interview’s over.I’ve got two words for you, kid: fucqking sleep.The tiger reclines in the simmering jungle.The sparrow has silenced her cheep.Fucqk your stuffed bear, I’m not getting you shite.Close your eyes. Cut the crap. Sleep.The flowers doze low in the meadowsAnd high on the mountains so steep.My life is a failure, I’m a shittay-azs parent.Stop fucqking with me, please, and sleep.The giant pangolins of Madagascar are snoozing.As I lie here and openly weep.Sure, fine, whatever, I’ll bring you some milk.Who the fucqk cares? You’re not gonna sleep.This room is all I can remember.The furniture crappy and cheap.You win. You escape. You run down the hall.As I nod the fucqk off, and sleep.Bleary and dazed I awaken To find your eyes shut, so I keep My fingers crossed tight as I tiptoe awayAnd pray that you’re fucqking asleep.We’re finally watching our movie.Popcorn’s in the microwave. Beep.Oh shite. Godtdamm!t it. You’ve gotta be kidding.Come on, go the fucqk back to sleep.Adam Mansbach’s novels include The End of the Jews, winner of the California Book Award, and the bestselling Angry Black White Boy, a San Francisco Chronicle Best Book of 2005. His fiction and essays have appeared in The New York Times Book Review, The Believer, Granta, The Los Angeles Times, and many other publications. He is the 2010-11 New Voices Professor of Fiction at Rutgers University. Ricardo Cortés has illustrated books about marijuana, electricity, the Jamaican bobsled The End team, and Chinese food. His work has been featured in The New York Times, Vanity Fair, Entertainment Weekly, New York Magazine, The Village Voice, and on CNN and FOX News. He lives in Brooklyn, NY, where he is working on a book about the history of Coca-Cola and cocaine. You can see his work at: Rmcortes.com http://boingboing.net/2011/04/26/go-the-**** -to-sleep.html http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/11192642-go-the-**** -to-sleep------------------~The present time is theirs, but the future is mine.~Nikola Tesla~There is no box.~H♥~Balance is not letting anyone love you less than you love yourself.~Felipe ~I remember, therefore I am immortal~LEXX ~It is far better to regret wrong paths taken than to regret the paths not tried~Giselle }><}}}(*>~juniperbsaronna, I deleted your post. If English is your second language, I understand the post may not have the intention as it read. If it was an error in your English, I apologise for the deletion and please do repost ------------------~The Earth Laughs In Flowers~... EmersonLEXXThank you juniperb.I will clue Randall in.E-mail me if you want.juniperbthanks lexx ------------------~The Earth Laughs In Flowers~... EmersonsaronnaJuniperb, post wasn't intended to be offensive. I can't remember what i posted. thanks for deleting post.AbsintheDragonflyOMG I so NEEDED one of those when the older 3 were toddlers!!!! I would have given one of my limbs some nights...insideintrovertReminds me of the night my oldest kid, when she was 3 years old, she kept on jumping up out of bed and was running around the apartment. I must have put her in her bed at least 50 times that night and I was so distressed about it. I wish this book was around when she was acting up like that because I would have had a very good laugh.SunChildI'm lucky I've never had that problem Lexx, they love sleep... usually both asleep by 7.30 every night, no problem. Let's hope it continues with the next one. My 3 y/o has never got out of bed before the morning. Sometimes I think I'm in an alternate Universe compared to my friends kids, geez I would go nuts!LEXXAbsintheDragonfly 'insideintrovert SunChild Oh yes, you are lucky! ghanima81Mine is like that too, SC. Granted she is up later than most (9-9:30 pm) but sleeps through the night since 3 months old until 7:30 am during the week and 8:30 on weekends. AMAZING. Hilarious story though. My bestie in Ireland would love this. Hers is a beast!SunChildThis was a news story a few nights ago. saronnaI heard it on live news
Go the fucqk to sleep - Presentation Transcript http://www.slideshare.net/spencermolly/go-the-f-to-sleep-7940745
quote:“Total genius.” –Jonathan Lethem, father of two.
quote:“This is no-guilt funny and a godsend!” –Cristina García, mother of one.
Go the **** to Sleep by Adam Mansbach illustrated by Ricardo Cortés
!""# $%&()# $*)*$+*,-& for Vivien, without whom none of this would be possible!
quote:The cats nestle close to their kittens now.The lambs have laid down with the sheep.You’re cozy and warm in your bed, my dear. Please go the fucqk to sleep.The windows are dark in the town, child.The whales huddle down in the deep.I’ll read you one very last book if you swear You’ll go the fucqk to sleep.The eagles who soar through the sky are at rest And the creatures who crawl, run, and creep.I know you’re not thirsty. That’s bullshite . Stop lying.Lie the fucqk down, my darling, and sleep.The wind whispers soft through the grass, hon.The field mice, they make not a peep.It’s been thirty-eight minutes already.Jesus Christ, what the fucqk? Go to sleep.All the kids from day care are in dreamland.The froggie has made his last leap.Hell no, you can’t go to the bathroom.You know where you can go? The fucqk to sleep.The owls fly forth from the treetops.Through the air, they soar and they sweep.A hot crimson rage fills my heart, love.For real, shut the fucqk up and sleep.The cubs and the lions are snoring,Wrapped in a big snuggly heap.How is it you can do all this other great shite But you can’t lie the fucqk down and sleep?The seeds slumber beneath the earth now And the crops that the farmers will reap.No more questions. This interview’s over.I’ve got two words for you, kid: fucqking sleep.The tiger reclines in the simmering jungle.The sparrow has silenced her cheep.Fucqk your stuffed bear, I’m not getting you shite.Close your eyes. Cut the crap. Sleep.The flowers doze low in the meadowsAnd high on the mountains so steep.My life is a failure, I’m a shittay-azs parent.Stop fucqking with me, please, and sleep.The giant pangolins of Madagascar are snoozing.As I lie here and openly weep.Sure, fine, whatever, I’ll bring you some milk.Who the fucqk cares? You’re not gonna sleep.This room is all I can remember.The furniture crappy and cheap.You win. You escape. You run down the hall.As I nod the fucqk off, and sleep.Bleary and dazed I awaken To find your eyes shut, so I keep My fingers crossed tight as I tiptoe awayAnd pray that you’re fucqking asleep.We’re finally watching our movie.Popcorn’s in the microwave. Beep.Oh shite. Godtdamm!t it. You’ve gotta be kidding.Come on, go the fucqk back to sleep.
------------------~The present time is theirs, but the future is mine.~Nikola Tesla~There is no box.~H♥~Balance is not letting anyone love you less than you love yourself.~Felipe ~I remember, therefore I am immortal~LEXX ~It is far better to regret wrong paths taken than to regret the paths not tried~Giselle }><}}}(*>~
If it was an error in your English, I apologise for the deletion and please do repost
------------------~The Earth Laughs In Flowers~... Emerson
I would have given one of my limbs some nights...
insideintrovert
SunChild Oh yes, you are lucky!
Hilarious story though. My bestie in Ireland would love this. Hers is a beast!
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