posted June 02, 2006 11:45 PM            

Across A Crowded Room

It happens all the time… Maybe it's at a party... a ball game... the grocery store or the post office… You see a certain someone across a crowded room… They've caught your eye, and you're not quite sure why… It feels strangely exhilarating and vaguely uncomfortable...

No Rhyme or Reason
There's no rhyme or reason, but there's definitely something "interesting" about that person… There's an undefinable quality that draws you in and attracts you to that person... and upon closer examination, you realize this felt "connection" somehow extends far beyond good looks or mere physical attraction...

So Familiar...
And while you're pretty sure you've never seen them before - they still seem so very, very familiar… and they seem so very attractive. Perhaps, no words are exchanged (since you're happily married and have four kids at home)… So you momentarily, silently muse: "What was it about that person?" And then you happily go on with your life.

Or perhaps (if you're not happily married with four kids at home), a conversation is somehow started... Perhaps the attraction instantly withers and wanes. And then you silently mutter to yourself, "Just what in the hell was that all about?" Or perhaps, a conversation is started... And then, whether you know it or not, you've just encountered someone who'll possibly take you on "the roller coaster ride of your life!"

It's A Family Affair
Popular author/marriage therapist, Harville Hendrix, chalks up this sort of instant attraction to an unconscious recognition of your childhood family issues in that other person. According to Hendrix, in all of our romantic entanglements as grown adults – we're simply continuing on with the working through of dysfunctional childhood issues we experienced growing up in our dysfunctional families. We've somehow unconsciously "recognized" all our "Mom and Dad stuff" cleverly disguised as a fascinating, alluring stranger.

For more years than I care to admit, I stubbornly refused to give any credence to this theory of romantic attraction. (And I still don't buy it all.) But astrology and the concept of "shared affinities" at least partially confirm his idea.

Shared Affinities
(Where Synastry Comparisons and Composites Leave Off)

Have you ever compared the charts of two romantic lovers – and, in the end, you were stymied, stumped and basically bewildered as to what the attraction between the two people might be? Then look for "shared" affinities in the birth chart. Shared affinities say: "Don't I Know You?" Shared affinities say: "We've been dealing with the same "stuff" all our lives…"

What's An Affinity?
Okay... Here's an example of an affinity... Sun in Aquarius is similar in energy to the Sun in aspect to Uranus. Both of which are similar in energy to the Sun placed in the 11th house.

Extending it, they're also similar to Uranus in Leo and Uranus in the 5th house.

Some astrologers go as far as using the formula:

Sun in Aquarius = Sun aspect Uranus = Sun in the 11th House = Uranus in Leo = Uranus in the 5th house.

While I don't take it quite that far - the energies (and resulting life task issues) are most definitely similar. And for simplicity sake – I'll be using this formula in subsequent examples.

You And Me Against the World
If two people share one of these affinities (similar energies) – the shared affinity says that these two people have experienced and are working through some of the same core, life task issues. And that's the bond! Shared affinities shout out: "Hey! I know you! We've been dealing with the same "stuff" all our lives…"

Example of shared affinity:

Here's the Formula:
A. Sun in Aquarius = Sun aspect Uranus = Sun in the 11th House = Uranus in Leo = Uranus in the 5th house

B. Moon in Aquarius = Moon aspect Uranus = Moon in the 11th House = Uranus in Cancer = Uranus in the 4th house

She
A. Sun conjunct Uranus, Sun in the 11th house
B. Moon conjunct Uranus, Uranus in Cancer, Moon in the 11th house

He
A. Sun trine Uranus
B. Moon sextile Uranus, Uranus in Cancer

These two people are dealing with the same life task issues encircling the archetypal energy of Uranus and "independence, freedom, excitement."

Okay now… Would this "shared affinity thing" be a wee bit more convincing... if I further told you that every "life-changing She" this guy has been involved with - the "life-changing She" has had the Sun in aspect to Uranus (and most had their Moon in aspect to Uranus)?

Another example:
Sun in Virgo = Sun aspect Mercury = Sun in the 6th House = Mercury in Leo = Mercury in the 5th house

She
Sun in Virgo, Mercury in Leo

He
Sun in the 6th house, Mercury in the 5th house

Exciting, but Tough Stuff
And while all shared affinities appear to have some validity in mutual attraction…. Shared affinities involving the Sun, Moon, Venus, and Mars aspecting the transpersonal planets of Uranus, Neptune, and Pluto appear to be the most earth-moving, shattering, difficult, compulsive, transformative, and exciting affinities. (i.e. They have the old "Yee Haw," "Ooh baby, Ooh baby" effect!)

Sun Masculine Parent (Father)
Moon Feminine Parent (Mother)
Mars Masculine lover
Venus Feminine lover

Uranus independence, freedom, excitement
Neptune dependence, transcendental love, one with the cosmos
Pluto passion, desire, control

Final example:
Let's mix it up a little:

Here's the formula:
A. Sun in Scorpio = Sun aspect Pluto = Sun in the 8th House = Pluto in Leo = Pluto in the 5th house

B. Moon in Scorpio = Moon aspect Pluto = Moon in the 8th House = Pluto in Cancer = Pluto in (or conjunct) the 4th house

C. Venus in Scorpio = Venus aspect Pluto = Venus in the 8th House = Pluto in Taurus or Libra = Pluto in the 2nd or 7th house

D. Mercury in Scorpio = Mercury aspect Pluto = Mercury in the 3rd or 6th House* = Pluto in Gemini or Virgo

* [I think, this is a mistake. It should be Mercury in the 8th House not the 3rd or the 6th House]

E. Sun in Aquarius = Sun aspect Uranus = Sun in the 11th House = Uranus in Leo = Uranus in the 5th house

She
A. Scorpio Sun
B. Moon in the 8th house
C. Venus in 8th House, Pluto in the 7th house
D. Mercury in Scorpio, Mercury sextile Pluto, Pluto in Virgo
E. Sun square Uranus, Uranus in Leo

He
A. Scorpio Sun, Sun squared Pluto, Pluto in Leo
B. Moon squared Pluto, Pluto conjuncting the 4th house (from the 3rd house)
C. Venus in Scorpio
D. Mercury in Scorpio, Pluto in the 3rd House
E. Sun trine Uranus

Three guesses on the dynamics and life tasks contained in this relationship? (And the first two guesses don't count...)

posted June 03, 2006 03:48 PM              

There are lots of these. I am not sure how relevent the ones I mentioned are. We just mesh so well together. Our minds think alike on a lot of topics..We both LOVE to learn, read, and explore. I feel like we have known each other before.

posted June 05, 2006 10:40 PM              

His Sun in Virgo - likes her Sun/Mercury conjunction
His Mars in Scorpio - likes her 8th house Mars
His Mars in aspect to sun - likes her Mars in Leo
His Moon in Leo - likes her Sun/Moon opposition (His moon in Leo especially likes it's conjunction to her Sun)
His moon in aspect to Mercury - likes her moon in aspect to Mercury

Gosh, this could go on all night! But, yeah, it definately puts a new spin on things!!

Another area of interest is the aspects between their ascendant/descendant rulers.

Example: He has Leo Rising, Leo is ruled by the sun - She has Sagittarius rising, ruled by Jupiter - and guess what, her Jupiter conjuncts his Sun.
His Jupiter (ruler of her asc.)also falls in her 7th house
Her moon (co-ruler of his asc.)falls in his 7th house

She has Gemini on the descendant, ruled by Mercury, he has moon & mercury conjunct his ascendant - They have a three-way love fest going on in his first house, her 8th involving both of their Mercury's, his moon & her sun. All 4 of the chart rulers between these two are definately in cahoots together.

posted June 11, 2006 04:41 PM              

Not too long ago, I was writing about a similar formula on my own, for my personal study. When I write like that, and I can't keep up with what's being "channeled through me", I know that it's on a universal scale, as in, universal consciousness. So it's cool to see someone take the same basic concepts and follow through with it.

And especially because you WILL receive a ton of information springing from that, such as what lioneye68 added. That's why, sometimes I don't care what the "books" say - I mean - I'd rather be here working in realtime.

posted June 11, 2006 09:21 PM            

Very cool! I'm always interested in spiritual connections to the collective consciousness.

Do you call what you do when you are channeling "automatic writing"? I have dabbed in it, but never have received a lot of information. I do get messages in my dreams and when performing daily tasks when I'm not trying to actively get messages.

posted June 16, 2006 10:23 PM              

It's a huge undertaking and intersting for sure. Like today I was doing something mindless, and like you, that's when all the good stuff arrives ... but I was thinking the above regarding Asc's - such as a Sun in Cancer Conj Asc. I wonder if it's more difficult to get to know someone who has the a Conj Sun/Asc? What do you's think?